South Park With An Odd Twist
The characters, events and references to persons, places or things in this fanfiction are nearly entirely fictional. There may be some portions of the aforementioned articles that are reality, however the majority is fiction. This fiction may have some qualities that appear to be slanderous, however no slander is intended with these pieces of writing.
Also, serious situations and circumstances may be dealt with in this fanfiction in a sense that may seem demeaning or naïve. All these things have been written with full understanding of the seriousness of the situation/circumstance and have not been taken lightly.
In conclusion, this fanfiction, much like the television show it is based off of has been written purely for humerous reasons. If one cannot deal with aforementioned appeared slandering and supposed naïve dealings with serious situations, it is advisable that one does not continue reading.
Due to such, as well as coarse language and potentially detailed horrific scenes, reader discretion is advised.
A Note Before We Begin: This Episode of South Park With An Odd Twist has been based off of an MSN conversation pertaining to Chinpokomon. All dialogue said by the characters Carl, Bob, Janice, Jeanette, Laura and Demmanu is what was actually said during this conversation. So, this is almost a collaboration of many different people. Dialogue said by Stanley Marsh, Kyle Broflovski and Eric Cartman was made up to fit the story. They were not part of the original conversation.
Episode 11: The Chinpokobattle Rages On, Part I
The three eight-year-olds, Stanly Marsh, Kyle Broflovski and Eric Cartman walked into the school gymnasium, where there was apparently something going on. They'd heard that there was some sort of Convention coming to be hosted in South Park, however they were very vague on all the details. As per usual, of course; there was no surprise that the Mayor was just as clueless as the rest of the populace as it had happened so many times before.
The three young males looked up at the banner draped across the gym doors, knowing that that would be the indicator of what was going on, or that was what was expected anyway. What they saw painted sloppily in the golden letters though only caused their jaws to drop and their faces to twist in disgust. This was some form of a joke, right?
"What? We pushed through all of those people to see this? A Chinpokomon Convention?" Cartman roared with anger, annoyed that his time had been wasted yet again.
"What losers still play with those dumb things?" Kyle questioned aloud, staring at all the people crowding around the different areas set up in the gym.
"It looks like these people do," Stan stated the obvious.
The gymnasium of the South Park Elementary School was only one of the locations in which the Chinpokomon pandemonium had been set up. This appeared to be the battle area though, as there were many large groups of people huddled around watching several others fight. It was a ridiculous sight to see the young children pushing their way through the crowd to try and see what was happening in the battle, but there were several attempting to accomplish this task.
"Liar!" they heard the shout from within the center of a mass of people and this shout caused several gasps.
"I wonder what's going on," Kyle questioned, the curiosity within the young boy beating out the thought that he was surrounded by losers.
The shout had come from within the center of a rather large crowd near the center of the gym. Most of the people were trying to force their way in to see what exactly was going on in that area alone, indicating that it was perhaps a really 'fierce' battle. This only caused Cartman to scoff though and even laugh at those who were being pushed to the ground.
"Who cares? It's just some dumb Chinpokobattle," Cartman crossed his arms over his large chest.
"I'll kill you!" came another voice after the first. This caught the attention of many of the people in the gymnasium, including Cartman. There was going to be death?
"Let's go see!" Stan said, leading the way as they began to push through the people to attempt to see what was so bad that that kind of declaration would be made.
Since they were all rather short, they were having a bit of trouble pushing the others out of their way. These people might as well have had their feet cemented to the damn floor, that's how difficult it was to get through. When they finally made it through to see what was happening, God only knows how they did considering the situation, they saw a redheaded girl duck in cover behind someone else. Perhaps she was the one who had a death threat placed upon her?
"I'd like to see you try!"
Their attention was brought to the left of them, where they saw two girls standing, though one seemed to be more fiercely into the battle. This girl, they guessed, was a teenager. Her shorter light brown hair was pulled back out of her face in a ponytail to reveal light coloured eyebrows narrowed over bluish eyes. Her stance indicated that she was ready to fight, whether it be through a Chinpokobattle or through physical force.
The girl beside her had a similar appearance, though her long, darker hair was definitely a noticeable difference. Grey-blue eyes stared incredulously at the girl beside her, perhaps questioning her sanity. This female wore a long dark trench coat and her hands were shoved in the pockets of this coat. She didn't appear inviting, but definitely looked calmer than the first girl.
The first girl, her name being Laura, ran away suddenly as something was thrown in her direction. When this something was on the ground, they saw that it was a pink, stiletto shoe. It sat on the ground harmlessly, its pink colour glaring up at Laura. When she noted its immobility, she ran over to it, somehow producing a can of gasoline and pouring said gas onto the shoe. She then lit a match and threw it into the depths of this shoe as an evil-like laughter escaped her throat.
"The hell?" Stan asked, not understanding what had just happened. Was there something they were unaware of about this shoe, perhaps? It seemed like a normal shoe to him though…
"I have no idea, dude," Kyle said, have the same feeling of oblivion running through him.
"I! I have made fire!" Laura pointed aggressively at the flaming shoe, mimicking Tom Hank's character in the movie Cast Away.
"No you didn't," the trench-coated female, Demmanu, spoke. "You merely-" This sentence was not finished though.
"No!" Laura shouted at the pink stiletto exploded in her face, a loud kaboom ringing through the gym.
"Oh my god!" Kyle exclaimed, shielding his eyes from the pieces of shoe flying in their direction.
"Since when has Chinpokomon been this violent?" Stan shouted over the loud explosion sound.
"Heheh, I remembered to pull out the pin this time," said one of two females on the other side of the circle once the sound level died down. She was referring to a grenade, implying that she rarely remembered to pull the pins out of the grenades before she threw them. This person held the name Bob, though a female.
Her short, dyed, black hair fell just above her shoulders, hanging around her face without being in the way of it. Her stance was cocky, as if she'd just won some award or battle without much difficulty. It seemed that the latter fit the situation better for there didn't appear to be any awards around them.
Beside her stood Carl, another female with a male name, with a look of complete alarm on her face. She held a similar appearance to Bob, though her hair was slightly longer, pulled back and the natural light brown of her hair colour was almost defeating the black dye. After a moment though, a grin crept upon her face, followed by laughter. This situation had somehow become funny.
"These guys are crazy!" Cartman yelled, drawing the attention of a few around him, but not too many were interested in what the fat child had to say.
"Shoe! I choose you!" they saw the redheaded girl come out from her hiding place and throw in her Chinpokomon, Shoe. Shoe flew through the air in the direction of the center of the circle.
"Hah!" came the voice of Laura, seemingly unaffected by the grenade that had just been unleashed upon her. "I will counter with my own Chinpokomon!" She proceeded to pull out a Chinpokoball. "Shoe! I choose you! My shoe will definitely beat your shoe! Shoelace attack!" Laura declared categorically as the two Shoes collided in mid-air and fell to the ground.
The redheaded girl, her name being Janice, blinked at the two Shoes collided and fell to the ground. "Mine is winning!" she shouted as the two Chinpokomon sat on the ground lifelessly.
Janice's red hair was definitely the shortest of all the girls in the battle. At her ears, it flared out, creating the appearance of wings in a sense. She was also the oldest of the all of them fighting, yet she seemed to be just as immature as the other four. No one noted this though, too intent on watching the Chinpokobattle, though perhaps it was because they were just as immature as well.
Carl threw in her Chinpokomon without either of the two Shoe owners really noticing at first, but Cartman noticed and didn't hesitate to point it out.
"What the hell is that?" he pointed at what appeared to be a boot.
"No mine is!" Laura declared, retaliating to what Janice had said, but she then noticed the boot. "Oh! It's Shoe's evolved form! Steel-toed Boot!"
Demmanu had a look of disbelief on her face, as if she couldn't grasp at what was happening before her very eyes. The insanity was all before her though, so she felt that she couldn't deny what was happening.
"What?" Cartman questioned, wondering if he'd heard correctly amongst all the cheering that was suddenly happening around them.
"Maybe they've come up with other Chinpokomon since we last played," Stan shrugged, staring at the boot in much the same way as his two friends.
From within the crowd pushed a long, dark haired girl. She seemed very hesitant about what she was doing, but she got close to the fray all the same, eyeing the fighters cautiously. It indicated that she didn't have her own Chinpokomon, but she was still ready for battle. Why she would want to join the madness was beyond them, yet she was there all the same.
"Is it safe?" the girl, Jeanette, asked, though she wasn't sure if anyone heard over all the noise.
Carl merely erupted into laughter, watching as her Chinpokomon, Steel-toed Boot, crushed both of the Shoes. Though all three items, which would normally be considered footwear, sat in the middle of the circle, unmoving, the laughter continued. After a moment though, she stopped to stare, as did Janice.
"No! My Chinpokomon!" Laura cried, mourning the apparent defeat of her beloved Shoe.
"You're all nuts," Demannu scoffed, wondering what the hell was wrong with all of them and why the hell she was even there with them.
"Do something!" Carl shouted after a moment, walking over to Steel-toed Boot and smacking it.
Laura looked up, seeing that Steel-toed Boot was not moving. "Steel-toed Boot seems hesitant… Shoe may have a chance yet!" A grin crept across her face as it seemed she regained hope. "Go Shoe! Attack now!"
Janice walked over to her Chinpokomon, picking up and staring for a moment. "You are useless," she told it before throwing it on the ground aggressively and returning to her spot.
Suddenly, it seemed that Carl had another Chinpokomon she was willing to use as she shouted, "Wire! I choose you!" She threw the metal wire, which appeared to be in the form of a skeleton of some sorts, into the battle.
"Dude, this is way too weird," Kyle mused, thinking that it was like a bad car accident. It was just far too disturbing and yet one couldn't rip their eyes from the scene.
"Hah, HAH!" Carl shouted as Wire sat in the battle area. "I have backup!"
As this was happening, Jeanette back away slowly, as if too horrified by the situation to remain any longer. She was, however, blocked by the mass of people standing around and unable to move any more than a few steps. She looked around for another escape, but saw none.
Wire did nothing but sit upon the two Shoes and Steel-toed Boot, like it had no idea what it was supposed to be doing. This caused Carl to exclaim, "God damn it!" before storming off, though she didn't go far. She too was blocked by the mass of people and she also wanted to continue with the battle.
"No fair! You can't summon another Chinpokomon in the middle of a battle!" Laura pointed accusingly at Carl, suddenly realizing that she'd summoned yet another Chinpokomon.
Carl stopped her storming and walked over to Steel-toed Boot, picking it up. She then proceeded to walk over to Laura and whack her across the head with this Chinpokomon, somehow sending the girl flying into the depths of the crowd. Many people flailed about as the body flew at them and it nearly caused a domino effect, yet somehow everyone managed to stay standing.
"Auto-hit," Carl said blandly as Laura's form went flying.
"Ah!" Laura cried out, trying to get back to face Carl yet again. "You fiend!" she shouted once back in sights of Carl. Laura didn't have too much difficulty getting up from her spot on the floor. She'd been the only to fall and since she was in battle, the crowd was eager to see it continue so they let her through.
Though laughing at Laura's predicament, Janice picked up her Shoe and threw it at Carl, though it seemed to have no effect at all since it merely flopped onto the ground. What did happen though, was that Wire finally took action. Wire didn't seem to know who the correct opponent was as it attacked its own Chinpoko-Master, stabbing her in the middle of her back.
"Oh! Me eye!" Carl shouted, making this shout seem inane considering she'd been stabbed in the back.
Laura laughed, instantly joined by Bob as well, watching as Carl fell to the ground, bleeding profusely. No one seemed to notice how serious a situation this was, even as Wire continued to wedge itself deep into the bone of her spinal column. There was high potential that she would die, yet no one seemed to care at all. Chinpokomon was just that enthralling to them.
"AGH! Don't attack me, you bitch!" Carl ordered, though it seemed redundant as Wire only continued with what it was doing.
Bob, meanwhile, was on the floor laughing uncontrollably. She clutched her stomach as she rolled around, finding this situation all too funny. Pain shot through her stomach with this laughing, but she continued to laugh all the same. While many around thought that this was rather disturbing, Bob's laughter refused to cease, ringing over the growing silent crowd.
"Wire!" Laura exclaimed in sudden realization. "It must be a darkness type Chinpokomon! So evil! Shoe! Help her!" What met Laura's eyes though was a merely motionless Shoe. "Oh dear! Shoe must be out of energy! What ever shall we do?" she began to ponder, trying to think up a solution.
"I don't know," Janice spoke from her spot on the battle field, watching at Wire continued to wedge its way into Carl's spine.
Carl managed to get a hold of Wire, pulling the vile Chinpokomon out of her back. This, however, only caused the girl to get her spine snapped, thus killing her. Wire didn't seem to mind though, moving now to attack Laura's Shoe, attempting to devour it.
"No! Shoe! Fight it! Shoelace attack now!" Laura shouted, watching as the evil Chinpokomon attempted to devour her precious Shoe.
Shoe's shoelaces flopped about feebly, trying to defeat the other Chinpokomon with whatever little bit of energy it had left.
"Go Shoe! Save the other Shoe!" Janice shouted, waiting for her Shoe to jump immediately into action, however it merely sat there for a moment before tying its own laces together and running off. "Stupid Shoe!"
"Your Shoe is a coward!" Laura shouted vehemently, watching as the other shoe ran away.
"I know," cried Janice in return, glowering in the direction that her Shoe had gone.
Wire continued to viciously attack Shoe, growling and pulling out its laces before spitting them out at Shoe's owner. Laura merely gawked, wondering why Wire was so evil. Sure, it being a darkness type Chinpokomon made sense, however it was just too strange.
"That's sick!" Kyle declared, watching the motionless form of Carl lying on the ground, almost waiting for her to jump up and say that it was all a joke. Nothing of that sort seemed to be happening though, especially since the blood continued to seep from her body.
Janice pulled out another Chinpokoball, proceeding to throw that into the ring as well. "Go Flip Flop!" she shouted and Flip Flop emerged from within the Chinpokoball.
"Shoe!" Laura cried as Shoe was defeated, her eyes wide with shock and sadness.
The Chinpokomon Flip Flop flopped around, waiting for its turn in this battle to begin. Wire, however had other plans. Flicking Flip Flop aside, it went straight for Flip Flop's Master, Janice. Wire began attempting to maul Janice to death, perhaps in the same fashion that it'd struck down its own master.
"Flip Flop! Help!" Janice shouted out, ignoring the crying coming from Laura's end of the battle area.
Flip Flop pathetically chose to run away though, much in the same way that Shoe had. People in the crowd parted as the Chinpokomon hopped by. No one wanted to even attempt to catch it, since it seemed so useless. The people stayed parted though as Wire was hot in pursuit of Flip Flop.
"No breeding outside of your own species, bitch!" Carl's voice met their ears, yet when they looked she still appeared to be as dead as she'd been when they last looked.
Jeanette seemed intent on joining the battle, throwing in what she thought was Wire's worst enemy, String. Though Wire was already gone, she thought that perhaps String would chase after and defeat Wire. String was released from the flying Chinpokoball and sat on the floor looking confused. She then realized that Wire already ate another version of String and panicked.
Running away from the deadly Wire, though Wire wasn't chasing her at the moment, she said, "Awh, curd muffins."
Bob decided to enter her own version of a Chinpokomon, Sting! Surprisingly, Sting appeared within the gymnasium, right in the middle of the battle. Where he'd come from, God only knew. Sting merely looked insanely confused and even a little uncomfortable standing in the circle of people, not knowing what to do.
To Be Continued...