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STORM SONG
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.part ten.
The morning smelled moist and raw and pungent, like the crumbled earth had been turned over and its essence now mingled with the air. Uncharacteristically, I slept past the sunrise, and was woken by Kagome's knocking. She had brought me my shoes and a cup of coffee she'd pilfered from the kitchens.
We need to go now, she said. Sesshoumaru-san is in a bad mood.
I grimaced.
I changed into my rumpled clothing from last night and followed Kagome out. She seemed ill at ease in the large building. Kagome was always a cozy sort of person. Mansions aren't her thing.
As we stopped at the bottom of the stairs, for Kagome to adjust her shoe straps, I heard a fragment of speech through an open door, made by Rin in her voice of chimes and chirps.
—a point, you know. If you'd be more courteous toward her—
I saw a flash of brilliant hair, white as angel wings, as the door to your den closed.
We left without breakfast, though there were a few stragglers still taking advantage of the Inumura hospitality. Inuyasha drove as if the speed limit were a figment of the imagination. Kagome yelled at him to slow down, he yelled back at her to shut up, and I only leaned my head against the window, trying not to remember last night.
I wasn't in love with you.
And Rin, she couldn't possibly be speaking to you.
A fortnight after the brief and unpleasant stay at your gaudy self-monument of a house, I found myself ensconced daily at libraries, conducting research. Desire, I'd decided, proved detrimental to all areas of healthy living. Thus resolute, I spent my time in the most non-personal, efficient way possible: gathering and sorting data. I was not about to allow my concentration to waver in my work any more than it had already; particularly, I would no be outdone by Kurosawa Tsubaki, who would gloat any triumph in classwork over me.
Typhoon season had not quite ended. One Thursday night, I realized nearing night o'clock that I must leave soon, before the rain that threatened in every swell of those slate, laden clouds began their tumbling fall.
The library I left from was in the Public Records Department of the financial district, and the bus stop was further than I'd supposed, since I didn't usually find myself among the affluent business community. As I walked, the night grew heavy and ripe, the air swollen with intent. I did not look forward to being drenched again. The winds, which had died down before the time I'd left the building, started whipping, rolling, and howling again.
—But you know all of that, because you were there too.
I saw you first, striding in the meandering crowd with a hassled aura. Your tie (why hexagonal flowers? In red?) was loosened to the brink of slovenliness. Our last encounter was less than peaceful, and a replicate did not appeal. I wanted to run. I stood stock-still.
Your eyes were absently scanning the crowd. When you saw me, however, you stopped and gawked. In that constantly undulating sea of pedestrians, only we had come to a stop, still as stone—like lighthouses built too close. We caught the beams from each other's gazes, and the darkness seemed to fracture with reflection, refraction.
In your face, in the one that had that most bland and stoic expression possible, I caught the twitch of your eyebrow. You were annoyed.
You're lost – a statement made in that endearingly rude way of yours.
No, I'm heading home.
Do you wonder, even now, why we have such rapport? It isn't because we're right, like Inuyasha and Kagome, or we're so deeply in love… like your stepmother, Izayoi and your father. No, it's because we're wrong, wrong for that interdependent spiral of life, that network and of friends and lovers. Life is about empathy and connections, but I love you because of disconnect. We're both disconnected, because we don't comprehend the others. We stand, both of us, outside of life's cabins of camaraderie, looking in. And finding another lost one is an aphrodisiac—at last someone who knows.
You regarded me, almost appraisingly. The corners of your lips tugged downward. Then, contrary to all of those bitter, knife-edged words we'd vaulted at each other the last time we'd met, you came by my side. For a moment I thought you were going to grab me, to some way take a hold of me, but you only stepped beyond me into the street, where dirty gutter water began to sully your shoes. You hailed a cab, and pushed me in.
I seem to recall you giving money to the driver, and calling up my address. How did you know my address? Oh, right, Inuyasha. I was silent as I rode home. I was silent when I entered the house. I was silent as Kagome recruited me for a family card game. Amidst the laughter and the cheering, I thought. I wondered about your act of generosity, wondered what it meant. I kept arriving at the obviously erroneous conclusion it was because you wished to be kind and courteous to me. As I laid down my jack of hearts, I spotted Inuyasha reluctantly apologizing to Souta.
Comprehension dawned—you were making up for the discourtesy you'd treated me with that night. It wasn't that you wanted to, but that your sense of honor and dignity forced you to.
I sighed, tucked a strand of hair behind my ears. I knew your motives. I know you. And at that moment, I wished to God I didn't.
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Thanks to CrisscrossAnime, Cold Kikyo, EnigmaticArsenic, Azn kawaii kikyo the devil, Lieberesse, and roxworld for reviewing.
roxworld : thank you, I try my best to make everyone as in character as possible…(Except Rin, because she plays a role that someone I know in real life is exactly the same way.)
This is a short read. I had so much trouble deciding what this chapter should be about. I considered having Rin join one of Kikyou's classes early, and considered having her meet with Suikotsu, but I believe that this little move that Sesshoumaru made is pivotal to the story. The demon prince is loosening up… IRL (in real life), classes start on Monday, and I will be hard pressed to work. I'll try to get another chapter up soon, but I can't promise anything. (-checks date-) Wow, it's been almost a month since my last update. Damn.
My little philosophical rant about "disconnect." That actually is one of my strongest reasons for the Sesshoumaru x Kikyou pairing. They both have no equals. They have people they care about, but no one to respect and share success with. With Inuyasha, he has Kagome, Miroku, and Sango. (And I don't really care whether Naraku has equals or not…. -sweatdrop-) Sesshoumaru and Kikyou, whenever they see each other in the anime/movies, has a grudging respect for each other, and that makes them a great pair.