"How did this happen to me?
"I don't know, Lee-lee."
"Stop saying that."
"I'm sorry."
"Stop saying that, too."
Her words hung heavily around them. It was just before dawn as they sat on the edge of the cliff overlooking the beach. Far off in the horizon, specks of light began to make their way across the water. The air was cold, but sweet and full. The soft grass beneath their legs left patterns of dew. Leah stared at the ground, running her palms through the moisture, collecting it on her fingertips, smoothing it gently across her face. Sam stared solemnly out to sea, looking for answers he wouldn't find in La Push, and might never find at all.
Leah had cried for a long time that night. Wrapped in Sam's arms, it was easy to push back the whys and the hows and all the rest of the awful questions, letting raw emotion take over.
When her eyes had finally run dry, it was time to talk. Leah found herself at the cliff with him, listening to him explain things she'd only dreamed of, things she'd discounted as campfire myths; the legends, the stories, werewolves, vampires, the treaty with the Cullen's, the super strength, the linked minds. Imprinting. She listened until she was numb.
Imprinting. Whatever the hell that was about.
She'd asked questions; open, probing, rude questions, and he'd answered her honestly.
"Why didn't you fight for me?"
"Wh—what?" he asked, stumbling over the word as her question broke him from his trance.
"You said you loved me. But did you really?"
"Leah…"
"No. Don't Leah me. It's magic. Fine. Whatever. But you say you loved me. So did you even try to fight for me?"
"I…"
"It's not hard, Sam. Either you did or you didn't. But the Sam I knew wouldn't have taken that bullshit lying down. Not if he really loved me."
"It's not that simple, Leah. I loved you, so much more than you can imagine. It's like a… a faded picture now, but I can still remember it. But imprinting… it's… it's gravity. You can't fight gravity."
"Bullshit. You didn't even try."
He sighed. "I guess… I guess I never thought to. I've accepted my fate."
She turned her head from him and stared out over the ocean. The ebb and flow of the waves mocked her. Who were the waves trying to kid? Nothing was that stable, least of all nature.
"I think you're a coward."
"I know," he sighed.
"This doesn't change anything. I'm not just going to suddenly forgive the two of you just because I'm forced in on your wolfy little secret. You don't get to blame magic for your own fuck-ups."
"I wish you could understand it, Leah. I wish you could feel the iron chains locking my heart to hers. I had no other choice."
"There's always another choice. And I hope to hell and back I never understand."
"I'm sorry."
"I don't want to be a werewolf. I don't want to be a part of a 'pack' or whatever, especially not with those idiots. And Seth? And God knows the last thing I want is to be anywhere near you."
He winced visibly and she rolled her eyes.
"What the hell did you expect, Sam?"
"I stopped expecting things a long time ago."
"Yeah, well, so did I."
They sat again in silence. There were mere feet between them, but it felt like miles. Or maybe eons. How had he gotten this way? How long had it taken destiny to break him? He was stoic, staring into the sea as if it kept all his secrets. When had he become this resigned, this willing to let fate, to let an abstraction, lead him blindly through life like a dog on a leash? Her Sam was gone. He was no longer the care-free boy who had promised her the moon. He was man, and animal. Leah wondered if he missed her Sam as much as she did. Would fate even allow him such thoughts, or were those no longer his to rule, either?
She vowed, as she sat there watching him watch empty space, that that would never be her.
"Sam! Leah!"
Both looked up at the sudden intrusion. Jacob was stumbling through the brush near the cliff's edge, pulling his shorts on after phasing back to human. They stood up as he skidded to a stop in front of them.
"Old Quil sent me to get you guys. You gotta come quick," he said, his voice panicked.
"What is it, Jacob?" Sam asked.
"Your mom, Leah, she didn't want to bug you unless it was an emergency. Seth's with her at the hospital," he said in a rush. "They thought they'd have time to give you some space, but you gotta come, quick."
"What? Why are they at the hospital?"
"You… you didn't see? When you… you know, phased?"
"I…"
Jacob looked at Leah. She could see it there in his eyes, flecks of the same expression he'd worn at his mother's funeral some years ago.
"Leah… it's… it's your dad…"