I am really really sorry that it took me so long to update. First I had a bad head cold, then work was insane as always, and when I finally had spare time all I wanted to do was sleep. I hope you all aren't too angry with me. This is a nice and long chapter, over 3,000 words, my longest yet for this story. I hope you like this chapter, and as always thank you so very much for your reviews because they give me the inspiration to write! Let me know what you think!

Disclaimer: I own nothing associated with Lord of the Rings.

Note: The few sentences of dialouge in bold are spoken in Elvish.

Chapter 10

Mandawen was burping Elenion as she had just finished nursing him, when there was a knock on her door. "Come in!" she called as she danced around the room a bit with Elenion. She turned around as she heard the door open and saw Glorfindel standing there. "Hello," she said with a slight smile and Glorfindel returned her smile and bowed his head.

"Hello," he said. "Are you and Elenion ready to walk through the garden?" he asked.

"Nearly," she replied quickly. "I just have to get my cloak and wrap him in his blanket." She moved over to Elenion's cradle and smoothed out his thick blanket once again and wrapped him warmly into the soft fabric. Mandawen picked him up. He started to fuss and she rocked him as she walked over to Glorfindel. "Would you mind holding him for just a moment while I get my cloak?" she asked and Glorfindel shook his head and took the squirming child who settled as soon as Glorfindel took him in his arms. Mandawen looked at Elenion and then at Glorfindel with a smile. "Well," she said softly and Glorfindel looked at her. She laughed and shook her head before she turned and grabbed the warm cloak Alya had given her.

Slightly surprised that Elenion stopped crying when he took him; Glorfindel turned his eyes from Mandawen and looked at the child. He had gotten much bigger since he had last seen him, and his hair was just as thick as it laid this way and that on top of his small head. Elenion's eyes were closed but they slowly opened and dark blue eyes, much like Mandawen's, looked back at him. The nearly two month old baby cooed and smiled a toothless smile up at him before he turned his face and pressed it against Glorfindel's chest. The Elvin lord chuckled softly and spoke gently in Elfish as he rocked Elenion and waited patiently for Mandawen.

Mandawen was fastening her cloak when she heard Elenion coo and she paused and turned around. Glorfindel was smiling down at Elenion and talking quietly in the beautiful Elvin tongue. She finished fastening the clasp and listened carefully to what he was saying, for she had managed to understand much of the language, and she understood some of what he was saying.

"You look much like your father," he said and Mandawen did not move. "However, you carry your mother's eyes. You will grow to be a strong man, this I can see. You're mother will have much joy in her life because of you." Mandawen hesitated a moment, but then quickly moved over to Glorfindel who looked up and gave her a smile. "Are you ready?" he asked and she nodded before she reached to take Elenion. "I shall carry him." Mandawen nodded her head and opened the door for him. Glorfindel chuckled and walked from the room with Mandawen following and soon falling in step with him.

"It is getting warmer," she said softly as they walked through the open corridors. "I hadn't realized it when I had gone to the dining hall with Alya."

"It is almost the first of April, there is little time left of the winter. Spring is quickly approaching," Glorfindel said as they moved down the steps and down the path towards the large garden. Mandawen smiled and nodded her head.

"It's hard to believe that it's been six months already," Mandawen found herself saying as they walked past the pathway that would lead to Heldreg's resting place.

"You said not long ago that it seems as if a great deal of time had past," Glorfindel said gently. Mandawen sighed and looked at him before she glanced at Elenion and then turned her eyes to the path ahead of them once more.

"In a way it does feel as though much time has past, but here," she said as she placed her hand over her heart, "here it feels much shorter." Glorfindel nodded his head and looked down at Elenion who had started to fall asleep. They continued to walk in silence until they came to a small stone courtyard where three benches sat. Alya was there with Benion and Alya stood at seeing the pair.

"It is good to see you finally leaving your room," Benion said as he too stood from their bench. Mandawen smiled and shook her head as a soft breeze blew around her and she pulled at her cloak.

"It is good to be out of it," Mandawen said. Alya moved over to Glorfindel with a smile as she turned her eyes to the child and saw that Elenion was nearly completely asleep. Mandawen followed Alya's eyes and sighed softly. "Perhaps it is time I return to it, it looks as though my son is ready for bed." Alya shook her head.

"Nonsense, you and Lord Glorfindel continue your walk," Alya said. "Benion and I shall take Elenion to your chamber and I will sit with him until you return." Mandawen opened her mouth to object but Alya refused to let her. "No arguments. I know you love your son, but you do need some time to rest. Now, enjoy the time while I let you, when this little man learns to walk and becomes the terror he is bound to be, I will be no where to be found to watch him." Mandawen laughed softly and Alya took Elenion away from Glorfindel.

The baby sighed and settled into Alya's arms before he was once again sound asleep. The two dark haired elves quietly made their way from the courtyard and Mandawen heard Alya's soft laughter before the pair was completely out of sight. She looked at Glorfindel who held out his arm to her. With a smile, Mandawen linked her arm with his and he continued to lead her through the vast valley gardens.

"She thinks my son will become a terror," Mandawen said and Glorfindel laughed.

"Yes, well, Alya has only Estel to compare with," Glorfindel said and Mandawen raised a dark eyebrow. "You have not met him, but he is the foster son of Lord Elrond. He was raised in Rivendell and is of mortal kind." Mandawen nodded. "He was a little rambunctious, but a good child all the same."

"Elenion will not be a terror," Mandawen said firmly. "I will be sure of that." Glorfindel smiled and nodded. They walked in silence for a little longer before Mandawen asked the question she had wanted to ask him since he had given her son his name. "I've been wondering why you had chosen Elenion's name, why you had selected the name with the meaning of 'a star' for him?" Glorfindel looked at her and then looked at their path. He was silent for a moment before he spoke.

"When Heldreg passed," he said slowly, "darkness settled into your eyes, a deep unrelenting darkness. A darkness that I had seen in only one other's eyes, an elleth I had watched fade after I told her of the death of her husband as he fought in battle many years ago. Then you gave birth to your son, and when you held him in your arms a light filled them. The darkness was and is nearly gone; he filled your eyes with the light of the stars once again. So, I thought it fitting," he finished. Mandawen stopped walking causing him to stop as well and he looked at her. She looked up at him and Glorfindel wanted to smile at the confused look that graced her face.

"Was it truly that obvious that Elenion brought a new hope?" Mandawen asked him slightly embarrassed. Glorfindel slid her hand from the crook of his elbow and took her hand into both of his.

"It was only obvious to those that know you," he told her softly and she smiled at him. Glorfindel kept her hand held with his left and raised his right hand to her face. He tucked the dark strands of her hair away from her face and behind her ears before he let his fingers trail down her jaw line. Mandawen was lost in his light blue eyes that reminded her of Heldreg, but they were different. They were lined with silver with silver flecks in them that made them seem to glow as he looked down at her.

She swallowed hard as he once again started to lean down bringing his face ever closer to hers. She could not pull away, and she found herself closing her eyes as his breath danced across her face. Glorfindel could feel his heart race as his lips closed in on hers. He wanted to kiss her; he felt the need to kiss her, if only to know the feel of her lips. His lips brushed against hers so lightly, Mandawen was not sure she felt them when suddenly he pressed his lips to hers more firmly.

Glorfindel did not plan to pull her close to him as he kissed her. He did not plan for her to throw her arms around his neck and then bury her fingers in his hair. Nor did he plan for her to hold onto him like he was her lifeline or for him to cling to her as his lips ravaged hers as if she was the air he needed to breath. He found then that he could not get enough and the spark that lit inside him when his lips touched hers didn't want him to stop, ever.

Mandawen whimpered against his lips, but found that she didn't want him to stop. He kissed her with a fire and she felt heat fill her cheeks as dark thoughts filled her mind. Mandawen pulled her lips away then and staggered back from him. She turned around and faced away from him, failing to see the confused and desire filled expression on his face. Mandawen raised trembling hands to her lips and shook her head. They tingled and she could still taste his kiss on them. She sighed and lowered her hands before she wrapped her arms around her stomach.

"I'm sorry," she whispered as she turned her head slightly and glanced over her shoulder. Her hair hid his face from her view and she quickly moved back down the path they had just traveled down. However, she didn't go to her room. She turned down a familiar path and through the nearly bare trees she moved effortlessly and into the stone courtyard. Heldreg's stone was covered with dead leaves and the flowers she had laid there before Elenion was born were dead and dry. She moved over to the stone and kneeled before it brushing away the leaves and tossing the flowers aside. She ran her fingers across the carvings that wrote out Heldreg's name and she closed her eyes before she lowered her hand and clasped them in her lap.

"I am sorry, Heldreg, I did not mean to kiss him back," she whispered. "It is just . . . I, oh Heldreg, I miss you so very much, and I fear I am putting him in your place." She let out a soft cry and laid her head and left hand against the stone. The setting sunlight that filtered in through the trees sparkled off the ring Heldreg had given her, and she closed her eyes and sighed. She let her hand slide down the stone, but she kept her head resting against it. "I am sorry, my love." She couldn't get herself to move from her place as she kneeled there, and as the sun vanished she gave into sleep, her shoulders and head resting against the cold stone and her mind lost to the world of dreams.

Mandawen found herself standing in a wide open plain with blowing long grass and mountains in the distance capped with snow. She frowned and looked all around her as panic began to fill her. Elenion, her son was no where near her and she was alone with no sign of other life within her vision. "Hello?" she called as she lifted her dark green skirts and walked through the grass.

"Mada," came a familiar voice from behind her and Mandawen froze. She slowly turned and her dark blue eyes met the light eyes of her fallen husband. Heldreg stood there with a smile on his face dressed in his dark green tunic and brown breeches.

"Heldreg," she breathed before she ran to him and threw her arms around him and held him tightly. Heldreg wrapped his arms around her in return and she lifted her head to kiss his neck, his cheek, and his chin before she pulled back and looked up at him with tear filled eyes. "How can you be here?" she asked and Heldreg sighed as he raised his hand to the back of her head.

"You are dreaming, love," he whispered and she frowned. "I decided it was time I came to you."

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"I have been watching you since I passed," he said softly and Mandawen's eyes widened. He raised his hands to the side of her face and held her face gently in his hands that were warm, rough, and familiar to her skin. "You have done nothing to shame my memory. You have grieved long enough, and it is time your heart moves on. Our son will only know a saddened part of his mother, of the woman I love more than anything, if you do not let go."

"How can you say that? I have shamed you . . . I . . . I," she didn't know how to tell him, but the smile that graced his face she knew he knew.

"Mandawen, you have done nothing wrong," he told her as he ran his thumbs across her cheeks. "I want you to be happy. I want you to live for the future, not dwell in the past of what was. We will meet again someday, my Mada, and when we do no matter what life you live from this moment on, I will greet you with open arms." He kissed her lips softly and slowly pulled completely away from her. She moved to close the distance but his form began to fade. "He will never hurt you. He will love you as I have if not more if only you let him." With that he was gone and Mandawen fell to her knees in the grass as she started numbly ahead, but her heart felt lighter. She closed her eyes and she let her tears fall, but a smile graced her lips before she laid back in the grass.

Mandawen sat up with a start. She was enveloped in darkness, but she was still where she had been before she had fallen asleep. She was still before Heldreg's stone, however, she did not feel sorrow as she looked at it. "Mandawen?" came Lord Elrond's voice and the woman stood quickly and turned to see him rushing into the clearing. "Are you well?" he asked quickly as he moved over to her surveying her in the dark.

"Aye, my lord," she whispered. "I am. I am," she said and as Lord Elrond met her eyes in the dark he seemed to understand. He nodded and took her arm.

"Alya has been worried sick and when Benion could not find Glorfindel, she panicked even more," he said and she frowned.

"Have you found him?" she asked and Lord Elrond shook his head.

"No, but he often travels the woods on a whim, he will return. Now come, it is growing too cold for you to be out," he said as he led her through the garden and back to her room. She did not think that Lord Elrond could tell that her heart was troubled. She had kissed Glorfindel, and shared a kiss with him unlike any of the kisses she had shared with Heldreg. Mandawen walked along in silence with the Lord Elrond, but her mind was racing. She did not think that she would be able to meet Glorfindel's eyes just yet, at least not until she figured out just what was happening in her heart and until she fully believed Heldreg's words. "Alya had said you were taking a walk with Glorfindel, but it had been hours since she had last seen you."

"After we had parted from Alya and Benion, we continued our walk, but soon parted," she said carefully, being sure not to mention the kiss they shared. "I went to Heldreg's marker, and I guess I lost track of time as I sat there. I had not been there since before Elenion's birth and I wanted to tell him of our son." Lord Elrond nodded his head as they walked but something told him, by the nervous and worried expression that was in her eyes. Soon, they reached Mandawen's room and when Mandawen stepped inside she was enveloped tightly by a very worried Alya.

"Thank the Valar," Alya whispered as she hugged Mandawen. "I fear the worst when you had not returned." Alya pulled back and at seeing Lord Elrond stepped back with a flushed face.

"I am sorry, Alya, when Lord Glorfindel and I parted I went to Heldreg's marker," Mandawen said softly. "I lost track of time. I did not mean to make you worry." Alya nodded and sighed quietly. "Thank you for watching Elenion for me."

"You are welcome," Alya said.

"Take rest," Lord Elrond said with a pause and both the elleth and the woman looked at him, "and we will see you in the morn." Mandawen nodded and Alya and Lord Elrond left her with Elenion and the candle filled room. Mandawen sighed softly and sat down on her bed as she turned her eyes to Elenion's cradle. Much was happening, and all too quickly. She just hoped that wherever he was that Glorfindel was well and unhurt, because she knew that her heart could not stand to lose him too.