Total Drama Alphabet
Chapter 10: Day 5: Part 2: Food That's Plastic, It's Fantastic
"And we're back!" Izzy exclaimed, striking her hand up, standing next to Bridgette on the Dock of Shame. "When we left off, everyone had to cook something yummy!" Izzy pat her stomach. "Yum yum!"
"And maybe even a little healthy," Bridgette said, with her hands in her pockets.
"Don't care," Izzy said. "If it tastes good, Izzy approves!"
"But both would be better, right?" Bridgette asked. Izzy simply shrugged.
"Did anyone notice where Katrina ran off?" Rachel asked. "Not that I'd blame her for leaving, but I am curious."
"Why don't you go and look for her," Alistair said, irritated. "Give us some peace."
"I want to watch Frederique blow this," Rachel said, grinning. "We are going to want to witness the reason we're voting him off, right?"
"I thought it was because he was mean to us," Xuxa said, confused. Rachel slapped her own face in frustration and shook her head.
"Pie," Frederique said, stroking his chin. "Izzy likes pie, right?"
"Everyone who isn't Jennie likes pie," Rachel said, smirking. "Do you know how to make a pie?"
"Flour, water, baking powder, fruit, I can handle it," Frederique said, confident. He then nervously looked around, and grabbed a bag of apples, and put it on his counter space. "Apple pie! Izzy likes that, right?"
"Ooh, thank you, need this!" Katrina exclaimed, zipping past, snagging the bag of apples, then hurrying out of the area.
Rachel blinked. "OK, I'm a little worried for her sanity."
"OK, so much for apple pie," Frederique said, scratching his head, then shrugged as he put a bag of blackberries on the counter. "Blackberry pie it is!"
"Yes, thank you, that'll be good too!" Katrina exclaimed, zipping through to take the bag of blackberries, then left as quickly as she appeared. Frederique was getting obviously angry.
"OK, I'm a little worried about her, but this is still funny," Rachel said, laughing slightly. "Any other fruits you want to try?" Rachel asked, feigning innocence. "I mean, aside from yourself?"
"Hardy har har," Frederique said, sarcastic. "I've still got blueberries here." Frederique lifted a bag of blueberries, and closely guarded them near his body. "And she's not getting these!"
"She's probably making some sort of recipe behind our backs," Alistair said, with his head buried in a book.
Rachel raised an eyebrow. "That doesn't even make sense."
"Only in her own mind," Alistair said. "Like you said, she's mental."
"I never said that!" Rachel yelled.
"Didn't you," Alistair said. "You tell yourself that."
"I will!" Rachel yelled.
Confession Vending Machine Room
Rachel: Urgh! Alistair is so infuriating! What is his problem?
"Here comes the fruit train, rolling on in!" Katrina exclaimed, as she walked toward Zack, sitting in front of the punishment room, looking in a bit of a daze. "Chew chew, thirty-two times before you swallow!"
"I'd really rather not," Zack said, inhaling the blackberries, probably not chewing at all.
"I wouldn't want you to choke, though," Katrina said. "I don't know the Heimlich maneuver." Katrina tapped her chin. "Accidentally got City Hall attacked that way." Katrina shrugged. "I'll never remember that i before e rule."
"It's i before e, except after c, or when sounding like-"
"I was kidding," Katrina said, giggling. "I know the rule, and I know it only works about half the time. Not much of a rule, really."
"Oh," Zack said, a little confused, as he took an enormous bite into an apple, and swallowed. "I'm sorry. I'm not used to having girls talk to me." Zack tapped his chin. "Or boys, for that matter."
"I'm sorry," Katrina said, looking sympathetic. "Everyone just kind of ignored you here, I was in my own little world, too busy to notice… I can be a bit scatterbrained sometimes."
"I'm used to it, really," Zack said. "I'm used to not having people notice me."
"Now I feel bad," Katrina said, looking slightly pouty, putting her arm around Zack. "You don't seem so bad."
"Thanks," Zack said, smiling nervously.
Katrina smiled nervously back, and started twirling her two pointer fingers together. "Forgive me if I'm out of line here, but I was hoping I might ask a favor of you."
"Sure!" Zack exclaimed. "Anything!"
"The other girls and I need you to vote for Frederique when we lose the challenge tonight." Katrina wiped her forehead with her hand.
Zack cocked his head, confused. "I thought Rachel and Xu… um, what was her name? I have trouble remembering that one."
"Xuxa," Katrina answered.
"I thought they liked Fred," Zack said, still a bit confused.
"Turns out he's not very nice," Katrina said, almost sounding bored as she started playing with her fingers. "We figured that out, and now we want him gone."
"Well, he wasn't really nice to me," Zack said. "Didn't seem to mind Alistair sticking me in here."
"Well we'll show them," Katrina said, grinning. "They will be shown."
Confession Vending Machine Room
Zack: (nervously looking at the camera) Does Katrina like me? It's so hard for me to tell. Am I looking too much into things?
"Why are we making homemade bread?" Hank asked, annoyed. "We could just heat some of the rolls in the pantry."
"Homemade is better," Stephanie insisted, with her hands on her hips, then went over to a large pot on the stove, put a spoon into it, took a taste of the sauce inside, and she looked like she wanted to gag. She then placed the spoon into a garbage can.
"Isn't that kind of wasteful?" Jennie asked, annoyed. "You could have reused the spoon, you know."
"I am just being considerate," Stephanie said. "I know if someone else put their mouth on the spoon, I would not want their mouth germs to go back into the pot. That is disgusting."
"You could have rinsed the spoon off!" Jennie yelled, turning red, then stormed over and took the spoon out of the garbage can and started licking it. Jennie then turned green. "OK, I'll admit that was an ill thought out way of making my point."
"Really," Stephanie flatly stated. "I thought you enjoyed being green."
"Is my face really-eww!" Jennie squealed, running off toward the bathroom.
Confession Vending Machine Room
Jennie: (wiping her tongue with a towel) That was disgusting! I'm pretty sure rotting meat touched that spoon. I'm not sure whether I'm more disgusted that it was rotting or that it was… OK, OK, I'm being a little ridiculous here. The rotting was the worse part, but I did not care much for the meatiness, either.
"Now, does anyone have a proper set of directions on how to cook a prime rib?" Stephanie asked. "I would love some directions on cooking this to its most flavorful."
"I'd recommend not including the murder victim, period," Jennie said, disgusted.
"I thought you weren't going to complain," Stephanie said.
"The pasta's bad enough. Do we really need a steak?"
"Yes," Stephanie said. "Yes, we do."
Jennie sighed. "Couldn't I at least make-"
"No!" Stephanie yelled, throwing her arms into the air. "We need this meal to be perfect! And it's not going to be perfect if we throw in your inedible nature faux food!"
"It's real food!" Jennie yelled. "And it's delicious, I'll have you know!"
"Vegetables aren't very good," Veronica said. "They taste terrible."
"I don't eat vegetables," Jennie said. "If you're going to create straw arguments about what I eat not tasting very good, then maybe you should actually learn about what I eat."
"You eat vegetables," Veronica said, then sighed. "They suck."
"I don't eat vegetables!" Jennie shouted. "Which part of that don't you get?"
"I thought vegetarians ate vegetables," Hank said, confused. "Don't they?"
"She's a fruitarian," Stephanie said. "I don't understand it, and I don't want to understand it, but let us at least belittle her eating beliefs properly if we must belittle her eating beliefs."
Jennie blinked. "I'm not sure whether you were defending me, or-"
"Neither. I don't care what you call yourself as long as you aren't bothering me." Stephanie shuddered. "And as long as you stop trying to insert your horrible meals into the challenge."
"I really do wish you would reconsider," Jennie said.
"Not happening," Stephanie said.
Confession Vending Machine Room
Jennie: (with her arms crossed over her chest) I can totally cook. Kind of have to: I would go mad if I couldn't find new ways to prepare my meals. And I really don't appreciate Stephanie assuming that I can't make anything decent. I'll just need to prove her wrong.
"Who is he?" Rachel asked, raising a pair of sunglasses for a better look at Zack, standing in front of her. "Are you sure he's a contestant?"
"Yes," Katrina said, grinning. "He's on our team, even."
"What is he doing here?" Alistair was lounging in his seat as he sneered as he saw Zack before him. "He's supposed to be out of the way."
"We know," Katrina said, smirking. "We know all about what you did."
"Well, tell someone who cares," Alistair said. "I really don't."
"Tsk, tsk," Katrina said, cutely waving a finger in Alistair's face. "You aren't going to last very long with that attitude."
"Too bad you need my brains," Alistair said. "I'm the only one with any on this team."
"I'm smarter than you," Rachel said, relaxing in her chair. "And Katrina's a genius. We'll do fine without you."
"But Frederique's evil!" Xuxa exclaimed, worried. "We need to vote him off!"
"We will," Rachel said. "We can wait to eliminate Alistair after Figglehorn."
"That's not my name," Frederique said, frustrated.
Rachel put her finger to her mouth. "I'm sorry." Rachel then glared at Frederique, putting her hands on her hips. "If I actually respected you, I might even care."
"You don't even like anyone here!" Frederique shouted, exasperated. "You just think of everyone here as your little slave!"
"Ideally, yes," Rachel said, admiring her nails.
Confession Vending Machine Room
Isis: I have this sudden urge to sock Frederique and Rachel all of a sudden. Not really sure why, but they probably deserve it.
"But-but we're friends," Xuxa said, rubbing her arm nervously. "Right.""Truth? No," Rachel said, annoyed. "I merely tolerate you."
Xuxa tapped her chin, then glomped Rachel, who looked uncomfortable. "I knew it! We are friends!"
"No, no we're not!" Rachel yelled, tensing up.
Katrina grinned. "It's so nice to see you two getting along so well."
"Lovely," Rachel said, rolling her eyes.
Jennie nervously walked over to Rachel, and extended her hand. "You're like the leader of this team, right?"
Rachel looked at Jennie's hand carefully, then shook it. "That would be me, Rachel B. Statler, at your service."
"The B stands for 'bitch,'" Alistair said, not even looking up. "And I don't remember anyone proclaiming you as our leader, either."
"I appointed myself, silly man," Rachel said. "Katrina seconded the nomination."
"Right," Katrina said, giving a quick nod.
Confession Vending Machine Room
Katrina: Or technically, I did no such thing, but it seemed like going along with Rachel's lie was the best move for every, really. Or at least for me and Rachel.
"Well, I wanted to make your team an offer," Jennie said. "Allow me to cook something delicious, and I will allow you to use it for your meal."
"Are you trying to sabotage us?" Rachel asked, raising an eyebrow.
"No," Jennie said, holding her hands together nervously. "My team isn't letting me cook, and I really wanted to cook for them and show them that I can really do this. I want to prove to my team that I can really do this!"
"OK, definitely no, then," Rachel said, glaring suspiciously at Jennie. "We don't really want to win."
Jennie blinked. "You don't want to win?"
"We want to get rid of Frederique tonight," Rachel said. "We don't really like him much."
"OK," Jennie said, nervously rubbing the back of her neck. "Can I make something for my team, then?"
Rachel grinned. "Since I am a very nice, caring, and giving person, I shall allow it."
"How about no?" Frederique said, angry. "I'm cooking here!"
"And we wish you would stop that," Rachel said. "Everyone wants you gone!"
"No, not everyone wants me gone!" Frederique yelled. "What did I even ever do to you?"
"You're kidding," Rachel stated. "Are you seriously that dense?"
"You're all sexist against men!" Frederique yelled. "All of you girls, banded together, to get rid of the men!"
"He really is this dense," Rachel said, slapping her own face. "I do not believe it."
"And people think sexism's dead," Alistair muttered, still not bothering to look up.
"Seriously, stop while you're ahead," Rachel said, then looked up to the sky. "Actually, it's too late for that."
"I'll just… don't mind me, I'll just quietly work here," Jennie said, trying to smile.
Confession Vending Machine Room
Jennie: Seriously, though, Alistair and Frederique need to shut up. In that fast a time I was feeling icky listening to them. (Jennie taps her cheek.) And Percy, too, but mostly because he kept staring at me. (Jennie shudders.)
"What are you doing?" Danielle asked, looking concerned as Ophelia had a corn cob under a microscope. "Are you even cooking?"
"Shhh!" Ophelia fiddled with the corn cob under the microscope using a pair of tweezers. "This… is… science!"
"Yes, we all know cooking involves science," Danielle said. "We learned that in school. But it doesn't really answer what you're doing."
"Science!" Ophelia exclaimed, as she heated the corn with a Bunsen burner. "In order to make the most delicious dish possible, I must convert this ordinary corn into delicious high fructose corn syrup!" Ophelia proudly held the corn high above her head.
"You know, we have sugar," Danielle said. "We could just use that."
Ophelia gasped. "Corn syrup tastes better! It's taste in its purest, most concentrated form!"
"Well, I was planning on taking some of your hair and making a red velvet cake out of it," Danielle said, smiling.
"Great idea!" Ophelia exclaimed, then put her hair into her mouth, chewing on it for a few seconds before making a face and spitting it out. "Eww, tastes like hair."
Danielle blinked. "That… you know that was a joke."
"I know, cat," Ophelia said, winking. "I was just playing along."
Confession Vending Machine Room
Danielle: Ophelia's annoying, but she's got good taste in television, at least.
Ophelia: My cat tricked me into eating my hair, too. (Ophelia crosses her arms over her chest and pouts.) Said it tasted like chicken Parmesan.
Danielle was watching George, amazed at his mixing dough ingredients together. "That is amazing!"
George smiled. "It's just bread. Anyone can do this."
"But you can't even see what you're adding-how do you know you're adding the right ingredients?"
"I smell them. I feel them. I weigh-"
"Wait," Danielle said, looking a bit disgusted. "You touch the ingredients?"
"Not here, no, but at home, I do," George said. "Helps me tell the difference between the cake flour and the bread flour. Isis gave me the bread flour for this, though."
"That's disgusting, I hope you're aware."
"I wash my hands first," George said.
"Well," Danielle said, unsure, "um, disgusting!"
"That's been assessed already, I do believe," George said.
"It bore repeating," Danielle stated. "Still, good job."
Confession Vending Machine Room
Danielle: George is a pretty nice guy, don't get me wrong. Just too bad he's defective. I do deserve someone as perfect as I, after all. (Danielle smiles brightly.)
Ophelia: (standing on her head) I don't even know why I'm in here! I just wanted to stand on my head! (Ophelia takes her hands off the floor.) Look ma, no-whoa! (Ophelia falls onto her back.) Ouch. That kind of hurt.
"Perfect!" Stephanie exclaimed, showing off the prime rib, with a sprig of parsley on the plate with it. "The perfect prime rib!"
"It looks carcinogenic," Todd said, smirking. "I love it!"
"No," Stephanie said, indignant. "I followed the directions exactly. This steak is perfect!"
"It does look a little well," Nicole said, looking confusedly at the steak.
"A lot of people enjoy a steak that's well done," Stephanie boasted.
"Didn't the recipe say medium rare?" Nicole asked.
"The recipe was wrong," Stephanie said. "But Izzy may enjoy a well done steak."
"You might want to make sure it's edible first," Hank said, poking at the steak, though Stephanie quickly pulled it away.
"No touching!" Stephanie shouted. "You probably didn't even wash your hands. And I will show you all how delicious this steak is!" Stephanie started to cut the steak, more and more rigorously, until after a couple of minutes, she cut off a bite-sized piece.
"Are you sure you want to do that?" Nicole asked, concerned. "I'm not sure it's safe."
"Of course it's safe," Stephanie said. Immediately after, the steak on the plate caught on fire. "I must have left the stove on."
Nicole looked confused. "But the steak isn't on the-"
"I obviously left the stove on," Stephanie declared, then put the bite on her fork into her mouth. Stephanie immediately looked like she wanted to vomit.
"So how does it taste?" Nicole asked, smirking.
"Delicious," Stephanie said, then very forcefully swallowed. "I wish I could-excuse me for a moment." Stephanie immediately ran off to the bathroom, and the others could hear the vomiting noises from outside.
Confession Vending Machine Room
Stephanie: (shaking her head, covered by her hand) I'm so ashamed of that display. I cannot allow myself to show such weaknesses.
Nicole: Something I learned a long time ago: you can't trust recipes. I once had a recipe for cake that called for sixteen pounds of butter. Not going to work well, it turns out.
Frederique was cautiously peeking his head in the main kitchen, then casually walked in. He looked around the kitchen and gathered chicken breasts, tortillas, and more ingredients.
Confession Vending Machine Room
Frederique: I was desperate! If my team wasn't going to let me cook in our little outdoor kitchen area, I had to hit the main kitchen! And cross my fingers that Chef wouldn't walk in.
Katrina: It's too bad Chef didn't see Frederique in his kitchen without his permission. That would've taught him a lesson. But then, he didn't know I was watching. (Katrina grins.) Advantage: Katrina.
"Ooh, what does this button do?" Ophelia asked, pressing a button on the range.
Danielle sighed as she was mixing meat, eggs, and various spices together, wearing gloves. "It increases the oven temperature by five degrees, please don't do that."
"And this one?" Ophelia asked, pressing another button.
"It turns the oven light on, now could you please stop touching things?"
Ophelia crossed her arms and pouted. "You're so mean."
"I'm trying to cook my famous meat loaf," Danielle said, smiling confidently. "Everyone loves my special recipe!"
"Ooh, I want to try it!" Ophelia stuck her hand in the beef mixture and took out a globful and put it in her mouth. She started chewing, then made a funny face and spit it out. "Eww, tastes awful! Taste like raw beef and eggs."
"It was raw beef and eggs, you idiot!" Danielle shouted, shaking in anger. "And now you've ruined the whole thing! I need to start all over again, thank you!"
Ophelia cocked her head, confused. "I ruined the whole thing?"
"Yes," Danielle said. "You've got your Ophelia germs all in the meatloaf, and now it's ruined! Thanks!"
Ophelia sniffled and shed a tear, then glomped Danielle. "I'm sorry."
"I really don't feel like playing around," Danielle said. "Go bug someone else. I need to start over."
Ophelia let go and looked down, rubbing her shoe on the ground. "No, I mean it. I got carried away, and I forgot you're a little grumpy sometimes, and I'm sorry. I like you, and I didn't want to annoy you." Ophelia smirked. "Too much."
Danielle smiled slightly. "Thank you. I'd hug you, but I have these disgusting gloves-"
"Don't care!" Ophelia exclaimed, and put Danielle's arms around her. Danielle looked confused, but smiled.
Confession Vending Machine Room
Danielle: All of my friends at home, take note: some people actually appreciate how special I am! You all should be embarrassed.
Frederique took the chicken enchiladas out of the oven in Chef's kitchen, and cut off a piece to taste. "Perfect," he said, then started to set them out on a serving dish, in a beautiful array. Frederique smiled, then walked out the kitchen.
Half a minute later, Katrina casually walked into the kitchen, carrying a paper bag. She casually tossed the chicken enchiladas into the bag, then walked out the same way.
Confession Vending Machine Room
Katrina: I never claimed to be Little Miss Perfect. But when someone hurts someone I care about, they go down! (Katrina shakes a fist toward the camera.)
Frederique: What those girls don't know won't hurt me. Just cook someplace else! What can go wrong?
Izzy and Bridgette were in the dining room, sitting in a booth, with the contestants watching. "We are ready to dine!" Izzy exclaimed, then bit off the end of her fork. "I'm starving!"
"Is that good for you?" Bridgette asked, worried.
Izzy shrugged. "Might have iron, I don't know, really. Can't be that bad, though. Though it might hurt when it comes out the other end."
"We really didn't need to know that," Bridgette said, disgusted.
"What?" Izzy asked, confused. "I mean, it's common knowledge, that unless my stomach acids can digest the fork-"
"We know, we know!" Bridgette shouted, nervous. "We just don't need you to tell us!"
"Oh, OK!" Izzy exclaimed, looking eager. "Team Himalayas, we await your dish!"
"George's bread, you must try!" Danielle sang, skipping from the kitchen, toward Izzy and Bridgette. "George's bread, worth to die!"
"We could've done without the death part," Bridgette said, taking a slice of bread.
"I dunno', I like the death part!" Izzy exclaimed, grinning mischievously as she took a slice of bread and stuck it in her mouth. Then took several more slices and stuck them in her mouth. "Twelve! New world record for bread mouth stuffing, made by Izzy, and the crowd goes wild!"
"The crowd is disgusted!" Danielle yelled, looking away.
"This is pretty good, though," Bridgette said.
"George made that," Danielle said, beaming as she swayed back and forth innocently. "Everyone on my team said he couldn't cook, since he's blind and all, but I stuck up for him!" Danielle rushed behind George and grabbed his shoulders, startling him for a moment. "I said that he could triumph adversity, that against all odds, he could make the bread to beat all bread!" Danielle made a fist toward the sky. "He would redefine what we call 'bread'! He would-"
"It's good, not great," Bridgette said, motioning with her hand for Danielle to stop. "I've had better."
"That didn't actually happen," Isis said, irritated. "Like not at all. You kept complaining about how disgusting it was!"
Danielle pouted. "It is!"
Confession Vending Machine Room
Danielle: OK, so I very, very slightly stretched the truth a bit. But it was for the best, right? I mean, what would all the people who look up to me as their hero, watching at home, think if they found out I did something very slightly unkind? It would have been selfish of me not to do that!
Ophelia: (pinching her wrist, holding back tears) I can't believe I said all of those mean things to George! I'm so ashamed… I can't even remember saying those horrid, horrid things… am I getting Old Timer's disease? Or maybe Young Timer's. I mean, if I'm so young that I can't even post my nude drawings of myself on DeviantArt, then I can't be that old, can I? (Ophelia taps her chin.)
Isis: I really need to kill Danielle. Deluded little witch, painting herself as a hero for the blind… urgh!
Danielle watched, nervous, as Izzy swished a bite of meatloaf around her mouth. "It is delicious, yes?"
"It's edible," Izzy said, then swallowed. "It's dry, and not very flavorful, but edible."
"You're kidding," Danielle said, taken aback. "I fix that for all of my friends, and they all love it!"
"Your friends are liars," Izzy said. "Sorry."
"Ooh, but you must have dessert!" Ophelia exclaimed, producing a couple of bright blue plastic cubes from behind her back. "You must take these!"
Bridgette looked concerned as Ophelia dropped one of the cubes in front of her. "Is there any hidden meat in this?"
"Oh, no!" Ophelia exclaimed. "No animal or animal by-products! Promise! Just pure flavor!"
"Don't be such a ninny," Izzy said, as she bit into one of the cubes, then immediately shoved the whole thing into her mouth. "Delicious!"
Bridgette scratched her head, then took a bite. She looked as if she were considering the taste for several seconds, then swallowed and smiled. "Pretty good. What's in it?"
Ophelia smiled wide. "Mostly corn. Corn syrup, specifically, but also a lot of trans fat to solidify it and make it even tastier! Ooh, and natural flavor!"
Bridgette looked like she wanted to gag, while Izzy put her arm around Bridgette. "It has natural flavor. That's healthy, right?"
Bridgette shook her head. "That's code for 'we don't want you to know what's in this, but it sounds healthy to most people, even though it isn't.'"
Ophelia gave a quick nod. "Can't really argue with her." Ophelia snapped her fingers. "She's too smart."
"People forget how smart she is, just because she looks like a typical dumb blonde, but she's like a genius!" Izzy exclaimed, glomping Bridgette, who looked uncomfortable. "Well, I mean, she's not as smart as me, of course, and Courtney and Noah are ahead of her, and probably Heather too, and-"
"Can we go on with the challenge?" Bridgette asked, slightly annoyed.
"Oops, sorry!" Izzy exclaimed, a bit sheepish, letting Bridgette go. "Team Moon is up!"
Confession Vending Machine Room
Stephanie: (nervously biting on a pen) We are so screwed. I just hope my teammates are intelligent enough to realize what an asset I am for this team when we lose. (Stephanie sighs.)
Stephanie was sweating profusely as Izzy and Bridgette each took a roll. A small roll that hadn't risen. Izzy and Bridgette both took a bite, and neither looked pleased.
"You like it, please say yes?" Stephanie asked, desperate.
"It was a little heavy," Bridgette said, rubbing the back of her neck. "Why don't we try the pasta?"
"Pasta time!" Izzy exclaimed, as she eagerly took a bite of the pasta in red sauce, and Bridgette also took a bite. Bridgette was making faces as she swished it around her mouth, while Izzy quickly swallowed, but didn't look pleased.
"You don't look pleased," Stephanie said.
"Uh, duh, the narrator just said that," Danielle said, rolling her eyes.
"I have no idea what you are talking about," Stephanie said, more worried than confused.
"It's a little… is this covered in ketchup?" Bridgette asked, as she ducked her head under the table, then shortly picked it back up, and was no longer chewing anything.
"No, it was a recipe I found for tomato sauce," Stephanie said.
"I think it's fun for a change of pace," Izzy said. "Not good, but fun. But now, Bridgette and I have a steak to attend to!"
"I don't eat meat," Bridgette said. "You know that."
Izzy waved dismissively to Bridgette. "This is charcoal. Not meat."
"It was a choice cut, I'll have you know!" Stephanie insisted.
"Was a choice cut," Izzy said, as she bit her teeth into the steak to tear off a piece. Or try to, anyway. She shook the steak in her mouth until it came loose from her mouth and hit Danielle in the face, who started screaming, and then ran out of the room, as almost everyone else started laughing.
Confession Vending Machine Room
Isis: On one hand, she's a brat and totally had that coming to her, but on the other hand, she didn't really deserve it right now. (Isis shrugs.) But then, I don't care, the way she treats me and everyone, bitch deserved it!
Danielle: (Danielle is crying a lot, quietly, using a lot of tissues, and with her makeup running.
"Well, this dinner's a failure," Izzy said. "Team Himalayas is winning so far, but we still have Team Amazon."
"Where is it?" Frederique screamed, from the kitchen. "It's missing!"
"Um, you didn't make anything, doy!" Rachel shouted.
"Yes I did!" Frederique yelled. "I made delicious chicken enchiladas, but they're gone!"
Confession Vending Machine Room
Katrina: (putting her hands on her cheeks) Whoops! Did I accidentally sneak the food that Freddy worked so hard on and toss them into the lake? (Katrina grins wickedly.)
"What did you do to my dinner?" Frederique yelled at his teammates.
"Some of us would have preferred we win," Alistair said, annoyed. "Don't get into this stupid 'we' crap."
"Oh, that," Rachel said, looking at her nails, not caring much for anything going on around her. "I set fire to it. Always wanted to burn something, and what better than the stuff you made for them to eat?" Frederique's eye was twitching, while Rachel walked up and put her finger to his chin, and stared him straight in the eye. "Don't mess with me."
Confession Vending Machine Room
Rachel: I didn't do it, but I needed to send everyone else a message: "don't mess with me." And I figure it had to be either Xuxa or Katrina who did it. If Xuxa got rid of the vomit Freddy cooked, then I deserve the credit more than her! And if Katrina did it, she's probably thankful that I'm taking the rap in her place. (Rachel looks directly into the camera.) You're welcome.
Katrina: I don't know why Rachel did that, but I'm kind of glad she did. I feel a little bad, getting off the hook like that, though.
"Well, it's obvious who the loser is," Izzy said. "Team Amazon, you have absolutely nothing to show for this challenge. You have disgraced the competition by not participating, and should be ashamed."
"It's not my fault!" Frederique yelled.
"I'm not finished," Izzy said. "Your nothing was still a lot better than Team Moon's something."
"But they didn't even make anything!" Stephanie yelled, indignant.
"You'd have been better off trying that strategy yourself," Izzy said, sticking her tongue out at Stephanie. "So I hereby declare-"
"Wait!"
Everyone turned around as Jennie rushed in, carrying a large tray of food, and placing it before Izzy and Bridgette. Stephanie slapped her own face in frustration. "You're on Team Moon, right?" Izzy asked.
"Yes, and I have desserts galore for you! Strawberry sorbet, a delicious cherry compote, caramel glazed oranges-"
"You're not allowed to eat that stuff!" Stephanie shouted. "That's not pure, raw fruit!"
Jennie rolled her eyes. "Why are you complaining? We're on the same team!"
"Good!" Izzy exclaimed, digging into the oranges. "Delicious! Five stars! Bravo!"
Bridgette sighed as she tasted the sorbet. "It's good, I guess."
Confession Vending Machine Room
Bridgette: OK, it was really good, but it's just hard to get enthusiastic over Jennie. I don't understand why she hates me. I mean, I understand her logic… I just don't understand her logic… or how I'm trying to word this without confusing myself.
Izzy and Bridgette were whispering to each other, then Izzy stood up. "Team Moon wins!"
"We liked the dessert," Bridgette said, shrugging.
"Team Moon gets the nice sleeping accommodations tonight!" Izzy exclaimed. Team Amazon, you're in last place. Choose who you want gone tonight."
"But that's not fair!" Danielle yelled, her body twitching. "Our team won! Jennie was too late! You can't just change your minds like that!"
"Um, we're the ones who lost because of Jennie, you know," Frederique said, glaring at Danielle.
"We can change our minds, and we did," Izzy said. "'Sides, challenge wasn't officially over yet, so it was perfectly legal."
Confession Vending Machine Room
Stephanie: (shaking her head, looking down) I'm a disgrace. I can never show my face in my home town again, it's that simple.
Jennie: Oh, get over yourself, Stephanie!
Rachel: (admiring her hand) Of course, all credit for allowing Jennie to use our kitchen should go to me. (Rachel stares straight into the camera.) You're welcome.
"I can't believe Rachel's not offering me anything," Percy whined, outside their cabin, near Alistair and Frederique.
"So glad you'd be willing to sell me out," Frederique said, rolling his eyes.
"Couldn't get Rachel to agree," Percy said, shrugging.
"All we need to do is get what's-his-face to see reason," Alistair said. "What was his name?"
"He wasn't a chick, don't know, don't care," Percy said, shrugging.
Confession Vending Machine Room
Alistair: Frederique is stupid, granted. It's just that the girls on our team are so much more annoying. His stupidity and neediness is relatively easy to tolerate.
"Hey, buddy!" Frederique exclaimed, walking toward Zack, who was playing paddleball, sitting on the grass, as Frederique sat down and pat Zack on the back. "How's it going?" Zack looked confused. "So, tonight, you're voting Katrina, right? We need to get her off."
"Why?" Zack asked, confused.
"She's evil, that's why," Frederique said. "She's convinced Rachel and Xuxa that I'm the enemy, but I'm not! I just want to be left alone! I already have a girlfriend back home, and I couldn't ask for anyone better!"
"That's ridiculous," Zack said, then started getting up. Frederique slapped his own face in frustration.
Confession Vending Machine Room
Katrina: You know, I actually thought Frederique was kind of cute. It's a shame he turned out to be evil beyond all belief, really. But no one treats my friends badly and gets away with it!
Xuxa: (foaming at the mouth) Freddy's going down!
Rachel: It's a shame, voting off the hottest guy here, but every now and then, appearances really are skin deep. Danielle and Frederique, both hot and evil, and Xuxa's… um… well, let's not worry about her. She's pretty vicious, really, and very not hot!
Percy: Katrina's leaving, I hope. She's just not that hot, but she's also not as ugly as Xuxa, so it wouldn't even be kinky. Just dull.
Nicole: Is Xuxa really that hideous? I mean, she's more than a little nuts, but I think she looks nice, really. She's a little overweight. I don't get the big deal.
That night, the seven members of Team Amazon were sitting in the comfortable chairs surrounding the campfire. Izzy was standing behind the podium, not looking happy, while Bridgette was standing next to her, holding a tray with six alphabet blocks on it.
"Can we just get this over with?" Rachel whined. "Just hurl Freddie into the stratosphere already. This is boring."
"It's building suspense," Izzy said, a bit irritated. "Building suspense isn't boring. It makes things more interesting. Or aggravating. Depends on your point of view, really." Izzy shrugged. "Either way, not boring."
"What suspense?" Rachel asked, yawning. "We all know Freddie's losing, so why even bother pretending otherwise?"
"You don't know that," Bridgette said. "You can't always trust everyone."
Izzy excitedly nodded. "Yeah, like back in the first season, Duncan totally should've lost in the hide and seek episode, but someone-gasp-betrayed Bridgette!"
"Geoff didn't vote me off," Bridgette said, a bit frustrated. "He wouldn't do that to me."
"I don't know who it was," Izzy said, then shrugged. "Probably Heather. She was mean back then, but anyway, onto the votes!" Izzy took a blue D block from off of Bridgette's plate. "As you can see, in my hand, is an alphabet block."
"Why is that a D, anyway?" Rachel asked. "No one on this team has a D name."
"Bridgette asked me that too, actually," Izzy said, grinning wide. "You'd be able to tell who was getting eliminated if we just had a letter specifically made for the people not going home. This way, you can't guess! Our letter selection today is D, G, L, S, T, and Z."
Katrina raised her hand. "We have a Z-named member here."
"I don't remember calling your name," Izzy said, narrowing her eyes toward Katrina.
"We weren't in school," Katrina said, blushing a bit.
"I know, so don't raise your hand." Izzy stuck her tongue out at Katrina. "You're silly, so I like you. But it isn't up to me whether or not you get to stay tonight." Izzy dramatically motioned to the Team Amazon members. "It's up to them."
"I'll be safe." Katrina tried to look confident, though she was nervously rubbing her pointer fingers together.
"Good luck, Kat," Bridgette said. Katrina noticeably cringed for a second before regaining her composure. Bridgette looked a bit confused, then shrugged it off and smiled. "I mean, I'm not allowed to interfere, really, but I really do hope you can make it far."
Confession Vending Machine Room
Katrina: (smiling nervously, holding her hands together) Truth? I have a bit of a temper, and I really want to keep that in check. I'd hate to go off at Bridgette, really. She's so sweet. (Katrina gives an enormous, closed-eyes smile for the camera, holding her hands tighter.)
Izzy held the blue D block up high. "If you receive one of these blocks, it means you are safe for tonight. If you do not get one, then you are a loser, and will be forcefully ejected from the game." Izzy started rubbing her hands together, rolling the block in her hands. "If I call your name, please come up and get your block."
"Rachel."
"Xuxa."
"Percy."
"Alistair."
Katrina, Frederique, and Zack were sitting in their chairs, while Izzy lightly tossed a yellow Z block in her hand. "This is the final block."
"It's not," Bridgette said. "There's another block after that one."
"Really?" Izzy asked, confused. "I could've sworn-"
"You forgot Zack," Bridgette said, shaking her head. "And he's safe."
"OK, Zack, come on up here," Izzy said. "Which ever one of you is Zack, anyway." Zack sighed, then walked up to collect his alphabet block, leaving Frederique and Katrina in their seats, both looking worried, though Katrina was trying hard to look confident. Izzy started tossing a blue T block lightly in her hand. "This is the final block. And this time, it really is! One of you is safe! The other is a loser! The person who will be staying with us tonight is…"
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"Katrina." Katrina put on a bright smile as she skipped over to Izzy and held out her hand, not paying any attention to the screaming Frederique who was flying high in the sky.
"I'm really happy you're safe," Bridgette said, smiling bright. "I want to see you kick butt here!"
Katrina saluted Bridgette. "I shall not disappoint."
"You disappoint us all," Alistair said, angry. "At least Frederique wasn't utterly useless."
"Just evil beyond comprehension," Xuxa said, smiling bright. "I don't really like evil people. They're so evil."
"And you're so redundant," Alistair stated, tapping his hand with his finger. "It's truly a shame you haven't a brain in that empty skull of yours."
"Can't really argue with him there," Rachel said, bored.
"I thought we were friends now," Xuxa said, sticking her tongue out at Rachel.
"Friends tease each other," Rachel said, filing her nails. "Best friends tease each other over every little thing."
Confession Vending Machine Room
Rachel: We're not friends, anyway. She's a fat, ugly, obnoxious girl who needs to wear something that actually fits her. (Rachel looks around the room nervously.) But for a fat, ugly, obnoxious girl, she's not that bad. If I were forced at gunpoint to befriend someone so horrible, I suppose I could do worse than Xuxa. (Rachel nervously drums her fingers on the arm of the chair.) OK, I like her, happy? She's a sweet girl, and she needs my help to improve her social standing. Maybe I can use my charms to find her a worthy boyfriend. I'm sure she would appreciate that.
"And thus concludes another thrilling adventure thusly!" Izzy exclaimed, standing on her hands on the Dock of Shame, while Bridgette sat on the edge of the dock with her feet dangling over the edge, hitting the water. "Frederique is gone, and he was pretty mean, anyway."
"Was anyone nice to him?" Bridgette asked.
"Rachel and Xuxa, duh," Izzy said, crossing her eyes. "But he's gone, so we don't have to worry about his icky boy germs getting on us anymore!"
"There's still boys left in the game, you know," Bridgette said.
"But not Frederique boy germs," Izzy said, then shuddered, still standing on her hands. "Those are the worst! I give them an F!"
"Ha ha," Bridgette said, sarcastic.
"But whatever, Frederique is gone!" Izzy exclaimed, flipping onto her feet, shooting her arms straight out from her sides. "And that leaves twenty-one contestants remaining on the island! Who will go next? Who will not go next? And who will stay while doing something they regret and feel bad about for a while?"
"And who's going to edit that out if it doesn't wind up happening?" Bridgette asked, turning her head toward Izzy, smirking.
"We'll keep that in," Izzy said, grinning. "That way, you'll stay tuned to see if that, or anything else interesting happens, next time on Total Drama Alphabet!" Izzy yawned, then scratched her butt. "Whelp, I'm pooped. Time for me to howl at the moon."
"I'm comfortable here," Bridgette said, looking up. "The moonlight hitting the water just right, the sounds of nature-"
"Yeah, nature's pretty quiet tonight," Izzy said, stroking her chin. "Think all the animals died?"
"They're usually quiet," Bridgette said, giggling a bit. "That's nature."
Izzy shrugged. "Seems pretty boring to me. Oh well, see ya'!" Izzy then started cartwheeling away, while Bridgette continued sitting on the dock, enjoying the view, occasionally swishing her feet through the lake, relaxed for several minutes.
"Hi Bridgette!" Katrina said, waving as she walked over toward Bridgette, smiling nervously, and started rubbing her arm as she got closer. "I was hoping I might find you."
Bridgette stood up on the dock. "Looks like you found me," Bridgette said, then laughed a bit.
"I was just hoping… well, I wanted to ask a little favor of you," Katrina said, pinching her fingers together.
"I can't promise without knowing what it is," Bridgette said. "I mean, there're some things I'm not really allowed to do for you guys as co-host and all."
"It's nothing like that," Katrina said, laughing a little, though still uncomfortable. "Earlier tonight you called me Kat."
"You don't like that," Bridgette said, guilty.
"I don't really," Katrina said. "I really much prefer being addressed by my name proper."
Bridgette smiled, relieved. "I'm sorry. I won't call you that anymore."
"Thank you," Katrina said, smiling bright. "I'd give you a hug if I didn't have to get into the water to do so."
"I can always do a rain check, " Bridgette said, giggling a bit.
"That sounds wonderful, really," Katrina said, smiling bright. "I'll hold you to that!"
Votes
Alistair: Katrina
Frederique: Katrina
Katrina: Frederique
Percy: Katrina
Rachel: Frederique
Xuxa: Frederique
Zack: Frederique
Frederique: 4
Katrina: 3
Team Amazon: Alistair, Katrina, Percy, Rachel, Xuxa, Zack
Team Himalayas: Bob, Danielle, George, Isis, Ophelia, Ulysses, Yancy
Team Moon: Elizabeth, Hank, Jennie, Nicole, Quincy, Stephanie, Todd, Veronica
Losers: Leanne, Walter, Candice, Frederique
Hope you all like this chapter. I'm largely not happy with it… dunno' why I'm having such trouble. It sucks.