PhyscoBarbie

Left Behind

Chapter 8

Hey there, if you all haven't noticed I changed my name. Twice lol. I really couldn't chose, so eventually I just started asking around my house what would be a good pen name for me. I got a few weird ones... but finally I came to Sammy, my fifteen year old annoying as shit stepbrother. I love him and I hate him. Since he is my only sibling even close to my age we hang out a lot. And well... he understands me pretty fucking well. One thing I absolutely hate about him is his nicknames for me. One is Physco Barbie. (Another is Ice Queen, and one more is Firecracker) Well I decided I actually like Physco Barbie so now it's my pen name lol. What do you think? Should I change it to one of my previously mentioned ones? Or a totally different like... oh, I don't know... GreenEyes? Or should it stay Angel's Maiden? I don't know, help me out here!

~Jasper P.O.V.~

When I got back at Bella's place she was curled of on the couch lookin' entranced in a book, 'Wuthering Heights'. It looked old and raggedy, but I can't say much considering the books I have at the Cullens'. At that moment I realized something... I am homeless. I'm sure the surprise was evident on my face, and Bella would have immediately notice but she hadn't seen or heard be come in. I quickly masked it before she asked or noticed because truthfully I really didn't was to think about it much less talk about it.

Bella had taken off the little silk robe and was now more exposed. She was wearing a thin white camisole and her hair was pulled up into a messy ponytail, a few wavy tendrils falling loosely down her back. The robe was piled next to her on the couch. I could have watched her for hours, reading. The sight of her soft bare shoulders was nearly overwhelming. It was quite an effort to resist the urge to wrap my hands around them and then slide them down her arms. She looked so…touchable. I tried (and failed) to shake away those thoughts and walked to the couch. I tried to make some noise so as not to startle her, but when I tapped her on the shoulder she nearly jumped a mile, her book flying into the air.

The sight was so comical I couldn't help but laugh. Her eyes had almost popped out of her head and her lips formed a small 'O' shape. She narrowed her eyes upon hearing my laugh and shot forward. I was so surprised when she pounced I didn't do anything to prevent it from happened. She knocked me onto the floor and I'm sure my face was similar to what hers looked like earlier.

She crouched next to me, a smirk on her sweet lips and smacked my chest loudly.

"Think that's funny, you Ass? You should see your face!" She then proceeded to whip out a camera from off the coffee table and snap a picture of me. After that, imagine my shock when she put the damn thing down her shirt!

"What the fuck?" Was my intelligent response. She shook her head slightly with a full blown sexy smirk on her face.

"You suck." She turned on her heel and curled back up on the couch with her book.

Again, I just had to say it, "What the fuck?"

She smirked and winked then said, "Well, Jasper, Fuck is an English word that is generally considered profane which, in its most literal meaning, refers to the act of sexual interc-" I rolled my eyes at her then tossed the bag of chocolate on the seat next to her, cuttin' off the end of her sentence. I jumped up from the floor and stood at my full height.

"You got me my chocolate!" She grinned and stood up and fucking patted my head and said, "Atta boy!" Then began digging through the CVS bag. I shook my head, once again, and plopped down in her spot and picked up her book.

She grabbed the zero bar then pulled the wrapper off and came and sat next to me slowly, lookin' deep in thought.

"Penny for your thoughts?" I asked her softly, watchin' her hair dance in the breeze comin' from the window. A small smile graced her face.

"Just thinkin' about how I was left behind...," Her voice was soft and distant. I felt immensely guilty. It was my fault for losing control. I knew, the whole time, I knew, I shouldn't of stepped those few steps closer. But she was just so beautiful and entrancing. I couldn't help my self.

"I'm really sorry about that, Darlin'" I told her, my voice gentle. Her smile wavered as she turned toward me.

"Sugar, it wasn't your fault." She replied, "Not only were you feelin' your bloodlust, but also five other vampire's. Even if you fifteen feet away you wouldn't have been able to resist. I understand." She paused for a second, "Prayer, thought, virtually nothing can change the past, but the effect of the past can be changed so the negativity will have no emotional effect on us."

I was surprised. A moment ago she was completely playful and fun, and now she was serious and sincere... I think I'm gonna have whiplash.

"You're right." I told her with a smile.

She gave a small unladylike snort and replied, "'Course I am!" It was then I noticed the slight southern accent that she had likely picked up from Chief Swan.

A honey blonde lock fell into my eyes, absently Bella pushed it behind my ear. Her fingers lingered there, so I reached up, staring into her big, beautiful brown eyes and held her hand to my face. I gently nuzzled my cheek into her warm hand. She didn't do or say anything, just let me. Abruptly I realized what I was doin' and yanked my hand back and pulled away. She stared at me, hurt clear in her eyes.

"I-I'm sorry, it's just-" I started.

"It's fine," She produced a big fake smile.

"No, I don't want you to get the wrong idea-"

"What is the wrong idea, Jasper?" She asked.

"Just- that, I-I don't know. That I wouldn't do anything with you because you were my brother's ex. Or that I use it to think of you as a sister."

"Use to?"

"Well, I certainly hope most brothers don't think the thoughts I have been thinkin' bout you, about their sisters." I chuckled, "But anyways, before, I haven't touched a human in so long... and I forgot how warm ya'll are. That's all." And soft. Defiantly soft. Or was that just Bella?

Now she just looked amused, and didn't respond. I was incredibly frustrated and I just wanted to lean over and find out if her lips were as soft and warm as her hand. I stood and she continued to look amused as she watched me.

"Do you mind of I go in the library and read?" I asked.

"Not at all," She made a sweeping gesture, "Shoo."

I smiled at her and heard her heart beat faster.

"Shoo!" She repeated and I chuckled and made my way into her small library and begun lookin' through the books.