Chapter 10
Around two weeks later, all the students were standing in the big hall they had once gathered in for the first time. Sasuke and Neji were standing next to each other, their bags next to them. It was the last day and everyone was about to go home. Sasuke kept looking at Neji awkward, obviously wanting to say something.
"..Well.. I guess I'll speak you soon through the phone hm." Neji said, looking at Sasuke with a slight smile.
"..Yeah.. Maybe.." Sasuke said and gave Neji a fake smile back.
"Maybe?" Neji asked, looking at Sasuke.
"..Well.. I wanted to tell you before, but I.. I think we should just, not see each other anymore from now on." Sasuke answered, looking away.
Neji frowned.
"..Why not?" He asked.
"Because we wouldn't be able to meet each other. I don't want you to get hurt in my city." Sasuke answered.
"..But.. you could come to me as well right?" Neji asked.
"I don't have the money to travel there, I already told you that once." Sasuke said.
"..But I can come to a point where it's not dangerous for me and you can walk to there as well right?" Neji asked.
"I'm not strong enough to defend you and just me walking beside isn't gonna stop anyone from hurting you." Sasuke said and shrugged. "It's too hard for a relationship to work."
Neji frowned.
"But I don't want to stop seeing you." Neji said. "..You could hop on my scooter and then we could drive to my house.. Sasuke please.."
"I just don't think it's a good idea. I can't even go to you that much, I work all day and have school and stuff." Sasuke said.
Neji frowned now.
"...Alright." He muttered.
"I don't wanna hurt you you know.. I had a lot of fun and I really do like you a lot.. I just don't think it's wise." Sasuke softly said.
"..If you think it's best." Neji said, shrugging. "..I would've liked it to continue, but well."
"I do too, but I don't think it'll work.. I'm sorry." Sasuke said, looking away as he noticed Neji was not gonna say how he really felt about it.
"..Alright.." Neji said, sighing, looking at the ground.
They kept silent now until Sasuke's teachers called for their students. Their buss had arrived. Sasuke turned to Neji now.
"So I guess this is goodbye then right?" He said.
"I guess so." Neji said, nodding. He looked at Sasuke, and then gave him a kiss on the mouth, after he had sighed another time.
Sasuke grabbed Neji's hands and pulled him closer, giving Neji a last passionate kiss. He then broke it and looked at Neji.
"..I'll miss you." He softly said.
"I'll miss you too." Neji said.
Sasuke gave Neji a small kiss on the lips and then turned around, quickly walking away. He knew he was making a big mistake. But somehow he couldn't stop himself from making it.
Neji watched Sasuke go and then sighed, looking away. He bit his lip and then turned around. He grabbed his bag and then walked to his own bus. Back to his school then.
That evening, Sasuke came home and opened the door to his flat. He walked in and put his luggage away.
"Itachi, I'm home." Sasuke said, walked in and dropped face first on the couch. He felt bad.
"Hey." Itachi said, from where he was cleaning the table. "How was it?"
"Fun until we had to leave.." Sasuke mumbled, his face in a pillow. He was laying on the couch as if someone had dropped him there and he hadn't moved since.
"I thought you didn't like it there." Itachi said.
"Neji and me made up and then it was fun. But we broke it off now." Sasuke answered.
"Why?" Itachi asked, frowning.
"Because I'm stupid..." Sasuke softly said.
Itachi pulled up an eyebrow.
"Can you just tell me what happened?" He asked.
"..Nothing happened. We had fun and I said I thought it wouldn't work for God knows what reasons.." Sasuke said.
"And why did you say that then?" Itachi asked, as he started to clean the door now.
"..I don't know. I said it was because it was too dangerous for Neji here.. It is, but still.." Sasuke softly said.
"Hm.. he was that rich kid right?" Itachi asked.
"Yes.." Sasuke said. "You're not really helping or anything."
"I was going to say you made a good decision." Itachi said.
"..Why?" Sasuke asked, sitting up and looking at Itachi, frowning a little.
"Well, I guess you don't want your boyfriend to be beaten up all the time right." Itachi said, shrugging.
"No but.. I thought you were gonna say you thought I was stupid.." Sasuke said.
"I'm not saying you're stupid the whole time Sasuke." Itachi said.
"Well all the other times I did something you did." Sasuke said shrugging. "..That reminds me. When should I move out?"
"You don't have to." Itachi said.
"Yes I do. I already said I was going to." Sasuke said.
"I don't want you to go." Itachi said.
"I know.. But I have to." Sasuke said, looking to the ground.
"Who told you that?" Itachi asked, putting up an eyebrow again.
"No one. I figured it out myself." Sasuke answered.
"Then you are stupid." Itachi stated.
"I know that by now, thanks to you reminding me of it every single day." Sasuke said, turning away.
"Stop sulking, this is the first time I said it instead of thinking it." Itachi snapped.
"No it's not. You say it all the time, probably even without realising it." Sasuke said back. "It's like you love putting me down and I know, I'm overreacting and being a drama queen. It doesn't really matter because you don't listen to what I say, it's all bullshit anyway."
"I don't know where you got this, but it's not true." Itachi said, glaring at Sasuke. "You're probably imaging things. You know I only lie when I know others will get hurt if I tell the truth."
"This isn't about lying, it's about you calling me stupid every day." Sasuke snapped. "It's about you looking as me as if I'm the worst thing in the world. And don't go telling me that you do so much for me and work for me, because dad did that as well and we all know how he felt about me."
"You're obviously telling me I'm lying, since you just said to me that I call you stupid all the time while that's not true." Itachi snapped back. "And I'm not even going to make excuses for my behaviour around you because you won't listen to me anyway. I don't feel like explaining everything I say or do anymore."
"No, you never do. I just have to take your word for everything. Even if what you say and do are completely the opposite." Sasuke snapped. "And I'm not saying you're lying, I never said anything like that, I'm just telling you you have to stop calling me stupid."
Itachi glared at Sasuke now.
"Sasuke shut your mouth and go to your room." He snapped. "I've had it with this nagging of you. And no I don't want you to move out, I just want you to stop complaining about every single move I make. Whatever I do, it's never good with you. You always get angry at me. Just learn to accept people for who they are, instead of trying to form them into your own mother and father 'and' brother, in one form. Because that's just not possible."
"If you don't wanna be a mother or father for me then stop frigging treating me like I'm your son. You can't send me to my room, you can't tell me what to do and you certainly can't act like I'm the worst person in the world." Sasuke snapped, got up and stormed to his room, throwing it closed with a loud bang.
Itachi stared at the table now, still looking angry. He then closed his eyes, heavily breathing, as he shook his head. What did he had to do now?
A little later, Sasuke was sitting in his room on the bed as he suddenly heard someone cry. And it couldn't be anyone but Itachi. Sasuke frowned and looked to the floor. Itachi never cried. He must have been horrible. Like he always was. Sasuke got up and went to the livingroom, where Itachi was sitting at the table.
"..I'm sorry.." He softly said.
Itachi now turned away from Sasuke, not wanting Sasuke to see him cry. He started wiping away his tears like mad now.
"..D-don't.." He muttered.
Sasuke walked to Itachi and suddenly hugged him tight. He couldn't bear it to see Itachi this hurt. He was so horrible for hurting him like that.
Itachi frowned now, as he kept shaking and tears kept coming out. Why was Sasuke hugging him now..?
"I'm so sorry.. This is exactly why I should move out.." Sasuke softly said as he let go and looked to the floor, feeling his own eyes water. But he wasn't gonna cry now.
"..I don't w-want you to leave." Itachi softly said, as he shook his head.
"..But I'm hurting you.. All the time." Sasuke said, looking away.
"..I d-don't care.. I love you.." Itachi sobbed, putting a hand in his hair.
"..You shouldn't.." Sasuke said. "..I'm just a horrible person.."
"You're not.." Itachi said, as he shook his head.
"..I am and.. I just so sorry.. I really don't wanna hurt you.. I don't know why I do.." Sasuke said as a tear escaped his eye.
"..You c-can't help it, I guess I'm just overreacting." Itachi said, as he wiped away his tears again.
"You're not overreacting.. God I just can't do anything right.. You shouldn't want me to stay.." Sasuke said, as more tears escaped his eyes and he looked up to keep them away.
"..I do w-want you to stay.." Itachi sobbed, using his sleeve to wipe away his tears now.
"Well I don't get it.. I've been wanting you to say that I should just go for so long.." Sasuke said, his eyes still wet as he looked at Itachi.
"..The worst thing you can do t-to me is leave me.." Itachi said, as he shook his head.
"I don't get it.. I just don't.. Why would anyone want me to stay?" Sasuke asked.
"..I j-just.. I love you.." Itachi sobbed. "..Just stay.. p-please.."
"..I'll stay.. But if I ever hurt you again then please just throw me out or hit me or whatever.." Sasuke softly said.
"..I w-won't.." Itachi said, as he shook his head.
"..But you have to.. If you don't hurt me back then I'll do it myself." Sasuke said.
Itachi bit his lip now and clenched his eyes shut, as he shook his head. He couldn't take this anymore.
Sasuke looked to the ground now as tears escaped his eyes again. He then suddenly sat down on his knees next to Itachi and place his hands and head on Itachi's leg.
"..P-please don't cry.. I can't take it anymore.. I need you to s-stop crying.. please.. I'm so sorry, I don't know what I'm doing anymore.. Oh G-God Itachi, I'm so sorry.." Sasuke sobbed, almost begging for forgiveness now.
Itachi now suddenly yanked Sasuke up and hugged him close, pulling Sasuke onto his lap. He just needed Sasuke close now.
Sasuke was startled at first, his eyes wide.
"..I.." He started but didn't know how to continue. He just wrapped his arms around Itachi and closed his eyes, letting his tears run.
Itachi was just silent as he hugged Sasuke close as well, sighed, a bit shaky.
Sasuke hugged back and they sat like that for a while. Sasuke was softly sobbing, trying not to let Itachi notice it. He wanted so bad to be stronger for once.
"..Just.. don't leave me." Itachi softly said.
"..I'm not.." Sasuke said back and sniffed. "I don't even want to leave.."
"..Then stay.." Itachi whispered.
"..I am staying.. I just.. I thought you would hate me by now.." Sasuke softly said.
"..I don't.." Itachi said. "...Sasuke, will you promise me that you won't leave?"
"..I promise.." Sasuke said after a while of silence. He still didn't get why Itachi wanted him there. But he would not go if Itachi didn't want to.
"...I'm just so sorry for being such a burden.."
"..Don't be.." Itachi said, as he shook his head. He sighed. "..Don't.."
Sasuke wrapped his arms around Itachi's neck and laid his head there as well.
"..I don't know why I keep doing it.. I don't want to fight you.." He softly said.
"..You're just in your puberty Sasuke, it's normal." Itachi said. "Because our parents aren't here anymore and I'm the eldest here, you go in against me."
"..I feel horrible about it.." Sasuke said. "I'm just so scared that if I don't fight you, you'll forget all about me."
"..I won't." Itachi said. "I'd never forget you."
"..I just don't know what to do with myself.. Promise me you'll never forget me.." Sasuke softly said, closing his eyes as he held Itachi tight.
"I promise.." Itachi said, nodding. "I swear to you I promise."
Sasuke sighed now, calming down. He knew Itachi was really promising this. Maybe they could just set their differences aside and finally get along all the time.
About a week later, Sasuke was sitting on the couch, watching some TV. Today was his day off, although he had to work that evening. He was home alone, since Itachi was working. The bell then rang and Sasuke frowned. Who could that be? Nobody ever came to the door. Sasuke got up and walked to the door, opening it. He frowned confused when he saw who was standing in the doorway. Neji.
Neji didn't said anything as he just pushed Sasuke back inside, shut the door and then grabbed Sasuke's head kissing him deeply.
Sasuke's eyes grew wide as he instantly grabbed Neji's waist. But he then pulled back and stared at Neji.
"What are you doing here?" He asked.
"..Visiting you." Neji said, looking at Sasuke. "..I just needed to see you, I'm sorry.. I know you didn't want me to come here, but I just had to see you."
"How did you even know where I lived? I told you it was dangerous here, are you nuts?" Sasuke asked and then grabbed Neji's head in return and kissed him deeply, before pulling away again. He was glad to see Neji, but somehow, he also wasn't. Neji could have been hurt.
"I asked your address at your school." Neji said. "And I know you told me, but it didn't stop me from going here."
"You weren't attacked or anything right?" Sasuke asked. "Jesus Christ, don't ever do this again. You can't risk your safety for something stupid as visiting me."
"I wasn't attacked no, there were some guys yelling at me though, but I biked past them as fast as I could..." Neji said, shrugging. "And well, I just want to keep seeing you."
"Well you can't, you don't have any idea how dangerous this place is." Sasuke said. "Who yelled at you?"
"..I don't know, some guys." Neji said, shrugging. "And indeed, I don't know."
"You're stupid. Really, really stupid. You could've been hurt." Sasuke said stern. At that moment, someone knocked on the door.
"I'm sorry." Neji said, frowning slightly. He then looked at the door. "Shouldn't you open the door?"
"I'm not sure.." Sasuke said, looking at the door suspicious. Neji said some people yelled at him.
"Why not?" Neji asked, frowning. The bell rung another time.
"..Because nobody ever comes here." Sasuke said, but then decided to open the door anyway. They wouldn't have followed Neji right? When he opened the door though, it flew open as about five guys stormed in.
Neji frowned as he saw the guys pushing Sasuke out of the way.
"Out of our way, shrimp!" One of them snapped. Neji swallowed. Oh god.. those were a few of the guys that had yelled at him.
One of them stormed to Neji and pushed him against a wall and then hit him in the face.
"Hey motherfucker, don't you ignore us now." He snapped and hit Neji again.
"Hey! Get the hell out of my house!" Sasuke yelled, pulling at one of the guy's arms.
Neji let out a yelp as he tried to push the guy off of him.
"Leave me alone, what did I do to you?" He snapped, but he was answered with another fist, this time into his stomach.
"Fuck off you." The smallest of the group snapped to Sasuke, but even he was at least one head taller then Sasuke. He pushed Sasuke into his room and then stood against the door.
Another guy walked up to Neji and rammed him against the head twice and then pushed him to the floor, holding him there by pressing his hands on Neji's throat.
"Let me out! Get the hell out of my house! You fucking bastards, go away!" Sasuke yelled as he tried to get out of the room. The guy standing in front of it was too strong though.
Neji coughed now, as he gasped for breath and tried to get the guy off of him.
"..P-please stop.." He groaned, as he felt the guy pressing harder every second.
"Aaw, are we afraid now?" One of the guys standing next to where Neji was laying, said, smirking. Neji frowned as he kept trying to breath, while he tugged at the hands that held his throat.
The guy just pressed harder on Neji's throat now, trying to choke him.
"You're one of those rich bastards and we don't like them. So we'll get rid of you, you motherfucking asshole." The guy holding Neji snapped. Another one wanted to kick Neji's head, but then suddenly a loud bang was heard and the guy who was standing in front of the door, dropped to the floor, screaming.
Neji frowned as he looked at the guy now. What happened? The guys around him turned around, frowning.
"Ey, what's with you punk?" One of them yelled to the guy on the ground. But it was obvious now that the guy was dead.
"Now get the hell out of here or I'll use the fucking gun again!" Sasuke yelled from the other side of the door. He had just grabbed his and Itachi's gun for emergencies and fired one. He knew otherwise, Neji would be dead for sure.
The guy holding Neji let go now and got up.
"Let's get out of here." He snapped to the rest.
They all nodded to him and then quickly left the house. Neji sat up now, heavily breathing, while grabbing his throat.
Sasuke opened the door and ran to Neji, pulling him up and sitting him down on the couch. He put the gun on the table, but made sure he had a good eye on it. Then he quickly moved and closed the door.
"You ok?" He asked Neji.
Neji nodded, as he got his breath back. He then looked at Sasuke, frowning.
"...Y-you.. just killed someone.. hn.." He said.
Sasuke looked to the ground and took a deep breath as he locked the door.
"..I know.." He said. It was his second killing and it felt horrible. But there wasn't anything else he could have done.
Neji looked at Sasuke, swallowing.
"..I didn't know i-it was this bad.." He softly said, and then looked at the corpse, laying next to Sasuke's room. He was deeply shocked.
"..Then you know now." Sasuke said and started dragging the corpse now. He felt horrible for doing this, but he at least wanted it out of the way. He would wait for Itachi to come home to help him get rid of it.
Neji watched Sasuke, before he swallowed and spoke up again:
"..Can I help or..?" He asked.
"I'll just get it out of the way." Sasuke said and put the corpse in a corner then walked to the couch and sat down, taking deep breaths to calm down. It really shouldn't upset him that he killed someone. It happened all the time that people got killed.
Neji put his hand onto Sasuke's shoulder.
"I'm sorry.." he softly said. It was his fault this had happened.
"Don't be. This has happened before." Sasuke said. "It just sucks I had to kill someone for it."
Neji bit his lip and then nodded.
"..Should I leave..?" He asked.
"Well you can't leave now, you could get attacked again." Sasuke said.
"True." Neji said, nodding. "I'm sorry."
"I already said you don't have to be sorry. You couldn't have known." Sasuke said shrugging.
"You told me." Neji said, shrugging as well.
"I never told you people get killed here that easily." Sasuke said. "I only said you could get beaten up."
"Yeah true." Neji said, nodding.
"I'm sorry you had to see this.." Sasuke said. He was just so embarrassed of how he lived and what he had done just now. Neji was one of the few people who actually saw him as human. That was probably gone now as well.
"You couldn't help it Sasuke." Neji said, frowning.
"I know.. I just don't think you should've seen that. I didn't want you to. That's why I told you not to come here." Sasuke said.
"Like you would've known you'd kill someone in my presence." Neji said.
"No, but I knew something bad would happen. And I don't exactly like you seeing how I live either." Sasuke said, looking away.
"I expected worse, if you're talking about your house." Neji said.
"Well I mean just about everything. I don't feel very comfortable having you over." Sasuke said.
"Oh, sorry." Neji said, frowning.
"Stop apologising." Sasuke said and sighed.
"Well you keep making me feel guilty." Neji said, shrugging.
"You're one to talk." Sasuke said as he got up and walked to the kitchen, pulling out a beer. He had wanted to save it, but right now he could use something to keep him from stressing.
"..Are you angry at me?" Neji asked, looking at Sasuke.
Sasuke opened his can of beer and drank some of it. He then went back to the livingroom.
"I just don't get why you would come here." He said.
"Well, to see you." Neji said, frowning.
"I meant why you would go in against my advice." Sasuke said. He really didn't like the fact he had just killed someone. Let alone that it was still in the room.
"...I think I fell in love with you." Neji said.
Sasuke almost choked in his beer now, starting to cough.
"W-what?" He asked between his coughs.
"I fell in love with you." Neji softly said. "..I just wanted to see you again.. I missed you."
Sasuke stopped coughing after a little while and then looked at Neji, frowning.
"..I've only known you for a month." He said.
"It means you made quite an impression on me hm." Neji said, looking back at him, smiling a bit sadly at him. He hated it that he had fallen in love with Sasuke, because Sasuke hadn't wanted Neji to come to him.
"Why? We've only been on good terms for around two and a half weeks or so." Sasuke said, completely overwhelmed and confused.
"Well.. you were nice to me those weeks and we had more fun then I've had in more then four years or something." Neji said, shrugging. "You listened to my stories and understood me."
Sasuke just stared at Neji. What the hell was he supposed to do with this? He had to admit that he had been upset about the whole 'not seeing Neji anymore' thing. But this was a just a lot to comprehend. Especially after what had just happened.
Neji looked at Sasuke for some more time and then looked away, sighing. He understood the message.
"You can't really expect me to say anything about this now right?" Sasuke said, frowning. "I mean, I just frigging killed someone after you marched into my house. I don't even know what to say about this."
"..You were the one who asked me to explain it." Neji said, shrugging.
"That doesn't mean I have to respond." Sasuke said, staring at Neji still.
"I guess." Neji muttered. He then sighed. "If we clean up the body and hide it, I could call the police so they can pick me up."
"The police sucks, so no." Sasuke said. "They're gonna wonder about the blood and the hole in the wall."
"..But.. how do I get away from here then?" Neji asked.
"I don't know." Sasuke said and sighed.
"..Would it be wise if I'd call someone to pick me up with a car?" Neji asked.
"Not if it's one of your fancy friends." Sasuke answered.
"..What if it's an elderly and mean looking man?" Neji asked, frowning.
"If he drives a fancy car, then I still think he wouldn't want his car to be smashed or shot at." Sasuke said.
"And if it someone with bodyguards?" Neji asked.
Sasuke glared at Neji now and then got up and walked to the kitchen again, sitting down there and drinking his beer. Neji wasn't even taking this seriously.
"What, I'm only thinking of ways to get out of here." Neji said, following Sasuke. He frowned. "I was talking about my modelling coach, she has her own company and has lots of bodyguards as well. I thought that they'd perhaps be able to scare them away or something."
"Bodyguards aren't gonna save her here. They can take one bullet, not twenty or more." Sasuke snapped. "You still don't see how this place works do you?"
"No, because I wasn't shot twenty times when I drove through here with just my bike." Neji said, glaring at Sasuke.
"No because you didn't drive here with a fancy car." Sasuke snapped. "Go sit in the livingroom, you're confusing me." Sasuke pointed to the livingroom now and looked at Neji stern.
Neji looked back at Sasuke and frowned.
"..Sasuke.." Neji started.
"What?" Sasuke snapped, looking back at Neji. "No, I don't wanna hear it. Just go sit somewhere else."
Neji looked away now, and then walked back into the livingroom. He sat down with a sigh then, on one of the chairs. Damn.. what had he gotten himself into?