Chapter 10.

So, Aragorn was riding along in his automobile…that he STOLE! How did he steal it? Well, he hotwired it and then shoved everyone in. Because they had to make a hasty getaway. You see, the security guards from the convention were after them. How did Aragorn know how to hotwire a car? Nobody knows.

"This is a sweet ride." said Gandalf.

"Whatever." replied Aragorn.

"There's a red light!" said Gandalf. But Aragorn didn't stop!

"STOP!!!" yelled Gandalf. Aragorn stopped the car and it screeched to a halt.

"What? Why?!" asked Aragorn.

"Your freakin' idiot! I thought you knew how to drive!" said Gandalf.

"I do! I just don't know what the lights mean." said Aragorn.

"Move over." said Elrond. He took Aragorn's spot and shoved him into the back seat.

"How do you know how to drive?" asked Gandalf.

"Rivendell driving school." said Elrond.

"Oh." said Gandalf.

"So, where are we going?" asked Pippin.

"To the airport." said Elrond, "We're getting out of this crazy place."

"We don't have tickets to get back." said Frodo.

"Shit." said Elrond.

The security guards had started to speed up. The fellowship was about to be caught. But Elrond had a plan.

"Lets see if you bastards can do 90." said Elrond looking in his review mirror. He started to speed up but just as he hit 88 miles per hour sparks started to fly and stuff. All of a sudden they were driving down a dirt road. For you see, the car that they stole was a Delorean! Now they were stranded in the year 1955. I guess.

Elrond stopped the car and everyone piled out.

"What happened?" asked Bilbo.

"Shit! I knew I should have stayed home!" yelled Elrond.

"Come on. It's not so bad," said Faramir consolingly, "Let's just find the nearest town."

So they started walking to the nearest town. They left the delorean there. Because they're idiots. Later some dude named Biff found it and he did some crazy things.

So, once the fellowship and co. found the nearest town they bought some clothes, which the could afford now because it was 1955 and everything was cheaper.

"Well, we need to get back to the future," Said Aragorn, "Because we definitely don't have a chance of going home here."

"You're right!" said Gandalf, "Everyone, put on their thinking caps!"

Everyone pulled out different types of hats from their pockets. There were party hats, top hats, bowlers, baseball caps, and really crazy hats that I can't even began to explain.

"I have an idea!" said Eomer, "We should go ask Saruman for help!"

"First of all, Saruman's still in the future," said Gandalf, "second of all, you're stupid because Saruman's evil."

"He's stuck in the future, is he?" said Eomer in a sinister voice, "Are you sure about that, now?"

All of a sudden Saruman fell out of the sky and started fighting with Gandalf. Then their staffs turned into light sabers.

"I have failed you, Saruman!" said Gandalf, "I have failed you."

"I should have known that the Wizards were trying to take over!" yelled Saruman.

"Saruman, Sauron is evil!" shouted Gandalf.

"From my point of view the wizards are evil!" said Saruman.

"Well then you are lost!" yelled Gandalf.

Then it was all like, Goozsh! Goozsh! With the light sabers and everyone was all like "Whoa! Dude!"

Then, Gandalf jumped over a river. Onto a hill or something.

"It's over, Saruman! I have the high ground." He stated.

"You underestimate my power!" yelled Saruman.

"Don't try it!" shouted Gandalf.

Saruman jumped and Gandalf chopped off both his legs and his arm. Then Saruman fell in the water and got washed away by the currant. Gandalf's light saber turned back into a staff and he slumped on the ground, exhausted. Everyone walked up to him.

"Well, we still have to figure out how to get back to the future." said Gandalf.

"I have an idea." said Pippin

Gandalf jumped up and everyone looked at Pippin for instructions.

"Now jump to the left." Said Pippin.

Everyone jumped to the left.

"And then step to the right!" Pippin continued.

"With your hands on your hips?" Merry asked.

"You bring your knees in tight!" Everyone sang.

"Let's do the time warp again!" everyone sang, dancing around like mad. "Let's do the time warp again!"

Everything disappeared in a whirl of color. All of a sudden they were in the middle of a big bustling city.

"Yatta!" they all yelled.

"Hello, New York!" shouted Merry.

Then a painting fell in front of them. It was a cheerleader and beneath her there were six words written. Aragorn picked it up and looked at it.

"Huh…" said Faramir, reading it over his shoulder, "'Save the Cheerleader. Save the world.' What do you suppose that means?"

"Who cares." said Aragorn chucking it behind him. It hit Sam and he died.

"Why did we end up in New York?" asked Frodo as they started walking.

"Because you guys can't sing for shit." said Pippin moodily.

"Shut up, bee-yatch!" exclaimed Aragorn.

"Hey!" some random lady yelled," Wow! You guys are those guys! Can I have your autographs?"

"Sure!" yelled Gimli.

"I don't want yours." said the lady. Gimli started crying.

"Why are you guys dressed like your from the 50s or something?" asked the random lady's best friend.

"We just came from a 50s dance." said Frodo.

"Really? Oh my gawd! That's so, like, kewl. If I had gone I would've worn, like, a poodle skirt or something." said random lady's best friend.

"Well, that's really interesting and everything but we gotta go." said Gandalf. Then he swept everyone away.

"Waaaaiiiiit!!" yelled the random lady, "I wanted your autographs!!" But they just kept on running. They ran for 10 minutes before they finally stopped.

"Oh shit. I think were missing something." said Legolas.

"What?" everyone asked.

"A plot." replied Legolas.

"You're right!" gasped Gandalf.

"Well, what do we do?" asked Elrond.

"Let's just run around like crazy people." said Pippin jokingly. Sam did just that and he ran into the street and died.

"Perhaps we could pretend like we're superheroes for a while." suggested Faramir.

"No, it has to be something funnier." said Aragorn.

"Maybe we should have just stayed at the Sci-Fi convention." sighed Gandalf.

"Well, we could have," started Elrond, "If somebody hadn't gone apeshit on us."

"Who did that?" asked Gandalf.

"You're fucking mom you retard!" yelled Aragorn.

"Relax! Maybe we should go consult the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles." said Eomer.

"Do they live in New York?" asked Gimli.

"Fuck if I know. I haven't watched that show in years." I said.

"There's that ominous voice again!" yelled Pippin.

"Stop hearing things Pippin, you jerk." yelled Merry.

"I'm not a jerk!" Pippin retorted. All of a sudden a card came out of the sky and landed at Sam's feet. He picked it up and looked at it.

"What does it say?" asked Gandalf.

"Rest on standing Astroturf." said Sam.

"What?" asked Frodo.

"Rest on standing Astroturf." repeated Sam.

"Let me see that." said Frodo trying to grab it from Sam.

"No! I know how to read!" said Sam trying to keep it away from Frodo. Frodo finally grabbed it from him and read it.

"It say's 'Rescue stranded Astronaut'" said Frodo.

"Fuck! Stop it! This isn't funny." yelled Elrond. Suddenly the card disappeared.

"I'm so tired." said Bilbo tiredly.

"We all are," said Gandalf, "We never got any sleep after that 20 hour flight."

"Well, let's all just fall asleep where we're standing." said Pippin. And they did just that.