Author's Notes #1: Surprise! I updated early!
Thanks to everyone who reviewed! (Could I ever give you enough thanks?) Hope you like this chapter!
How I wish I had a better title for this chapter!
Chapter Ten: Words of Encouragement
Encouragement Day.
Quite possibly the most tooth-achingly sweet "holiday" Roxas's school ever conceived.
On Encouragement Day, students would anonymously give each other notes of encouragement, about anything at all, whether it be a test, a family situation, or the death of a loved one. Sometimes, students would give each other gifts instead of notes, and most of the time, they weren't anonymous. In some people's eyes, including Roxas's, that ruined what little spirit the "holiday" had. It was fun to try to figure out who had been kind enough to send you a note, as if that person was some mysterious guardian angel watching over you. It was fine to give each other gifts. Just don't show off and blab about it.
The "holiday" was invented by some student council of the distant past out of necessity. Two of the students had gotten into an argument and, before they knew it, it turned into a bloody fistfight, greatly upsetting the parents of both kids. They thought that by having the students give each other words of encouragement, they would keep the peace and prevent any future fights.
Strangely, one of those kids' names happened to be Cloud Strife. Roxas's father told this story to him every morning at the breakfast table.
His school celebrated Encouragement Day every year on October 6th.
When Roxas had lived through Encouragement Day in his freshman year, he was feeling exhausted from lack of sleep and did not think much of the small Post-it note he found stuck to his locker or the brand-new skateboard that appeared at his doorstep.
'Good luck in History!' the small note said, followed by what looked like an attempt at a smiley face, but ended up looking more like a misshapen oval with lines. It was left anonymous, the way it was meant. He simply dismissed it as an extra act of kindness from his girlfriend.
If he only knew.
Brrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiinnnnng...!
Roxas heard the bell and cursed it for its terrible timing.
"Huh?' Namine looked around at the rush of students. "Oh, class is starting. Sorry, Roxas, can we talk about this later? We're gonna be late."
"B-but..." What? Later? No! He needed to talk about this now!
She turned, away from him, and ran into a nearby classroom, books in hand. "Tell me later!" she called out. He could've chased after her, but she soon became lost in the sea of students. Goddamn it, people! Find your classrooms!
Roxas sighed in defeat. It looked like it would have to wait. Now he had to deal with Mr. Saix and History. Not a good time to break up with your girlfriend of two years. Or rather, one month, in this case.
"C'mon Axel, let's go." he called.
There was no response.
"...Axel?" he asked again. Roxas looked around the now empty halls. Where was he?
It turned out the halls were not so empty. There was a single student, running as fast as he could -in other words, not very fast- trying not to be even later than he already was.
"Hey, you!" Roxas called out to him. "Do you know where Axel Parr went?"
"I have a name." The boy said defiantly. "It's Hayner."
Roxas rolled his eyes. "Yeah, whatever- Where'd he go?"
"Last I heard, he went to the principal's office."
"Got in trouble again?"
"Guess so. Listen," he said, irritated. "I have to get to class. Don't you have to get to yours?"
"Yes, Mr. Strife, don't you?"
The cold voice of Mr. Saix interrupted the two boys' conversation. Roxas felt a hand grip his shoulder so tightly, it hurt.
'Crap.'
"Crap!" Hayner shrieked. "I-I've got to get going now!" He promptly ran away screaming, leaving Roxas under the teacher's cold stare.
'Thanks a lot, Hay-freakin'-ner.'
"I'll get to class now," he murmured timidly, slowly trudging into the classroom and taking his seat.
"Class, I apologize for the interruption." Mr. Saix announced once he returned to his rightful place at the front of the room. "It seems that some of us would rather talk to our friends than attend class."
Roxas sank lower into his seat.
"As I was saying, some of you may have heard the news about my front yard. Let me tell you that it will take thousands of munny to pay for the damage done. Therefore, I am in a bad mood today, so if any..." He made eye contact with every student in the class. "...of you little pissants get on my nerves today, you'll be spending the rest of your school life here rotting in detention. But rest assured, when I find the person responsible, they will suffer a far worse fate."
Damn, Mr. Saix was scary. However, this was pre-cigarette, so Mr. Saix wasn't angry at him in particular. That was good. That was a good thing.
He looked to his side to see if Axel was just as freaked out as he was, then he remembered Axel wasn't there. It hurt a lot more than he expected it to.
He tried to listen to Mr. Saix. He actually tried to pay attention to whatever he was saying, because it had been a long time since he wasn't singled out as his object of torture. Unfortunately for him, he thought more about what he would have to do later. How Namine would react. And the more he thought about it, the more he felt bad. And the more he felt bad, the more he thought maybe he shouldn't go through with it after all.
That was bad. Roxas rarely did anything this bold. He needed to do it while he was still up for it, or else he wouldn't be able to do it. He needed to break up with her as soon as possible.
An easy way of dealing with it would be to send her the infamous "text message breakup." Namine didn't check her messages until after school hours because of the rules, and by then, he would be at home, locked up in his room and away from any bitter feelings she may have about it. But he wouldn't do that. He wouldn't run away. He would break up with her with dignity. With class.
He would pass her a note.
Get it over with as soon as possible, right? No one else would know, and it wasn't like she could react to it too much in class, right? He would explain it to her later.
"Hey," he whispered to the girl sitting in front of him. She yawned and slightly turned her head. "Could you pass this to Namine?" He could only hope that she wouldn't open it up and read it.
She scoffed, taking it. "Whatever. I don't want to get in the way of your lovey-dovey romance or whatever." She tiredly held it out in front of her.
'Yes!'
"Passing notes in class, are we, Mr. Strife?" the stern voice of Mr. Saix interrupted. Somehow, he had managed to teleport from the front of the classroom to beside his desk without him noticing.
'No!'
"I'll take that." He snatched it away from the girl's hand. He did it quite easily, too, since she was too tired to get a good grip on it. "Let's see what's so important." Roxas could only watch in horror as he unfolded it and cleared his throat.
"Uhh, I don't think you want to do that!" he said frantically. Okay, he could understand confiscating it, but reading it aloud to the class?
"Namine," Mr. Saix began to read. "I'm sorry to break it to you like this, but..."
No! Namine wasn't supposed to hear it like this! Now, everyone would know! Oh, this was such a bad idea! What was he thinking? He had to stop him. "No, don't read it! It's stupid anywa-"
"...I want to break up. I'll explain later. -Roxas"
"It's a lie! I didn't write that!" Too late.
Everything became eerily quiet. Roxas could only hope that no one was paying attention and that Mr. Saix wouldn't continue to talk about this. No one was saying or doing anything. He was sweating in his seat wishing that something would happen to distract him from this suspense.
Then he heard the whispers. Whispers from all around the classroom. He could hear some of them quite clearly. Some people were shocked that he would break up with her after the two of them looked so happy together. Others thought he was an ass.
"Breaking up? On Encouragement Day?"
"I know! The nerve!"
The point was, everyone in the classroom had heard it. Even the students who never paid attention in class heard it.
Even Namine heard it.
CRASH!
Roxas could only see books and papers fly and scatter as a desk was violently flipped over. The lights dimmed, the Earth stopped moving, Hell froze over, and in the middle of it all, Namine, eyes ablaze and teeth clenched, growled out with all the fury of a woman scorned,
"WHAAAAAT?"
Oh wait, no. That was just Roxas's imagination. Thank god. What really happened was…
"Roxas?"
Namine's voice sounded weak and hurt. She was looking at him disbelievingly, searching his face for something that said he was just kidding, that it was just a joke. She didn't find anything but shock and horror.
"Namine, let me explain!"
She shook her head. She didn't want to hear it. "You think this is stupid?" she whispered. He opened his mouth to tell her that wasn't what he meant, but she already shot out of her seat and ran out of the classroom, head down and eyes wet.
He stood up to chase after her, ignoring the whispers. He needed to explain.
"Look at him. That's so pathetic."
"-made her cry. Then he has the nerve to-"
"Can you believe it?"
The whispers faded out when he reached a certain hallway. He leaned against a locker, trying to catch his breath. He didn't know Namine could run that fast. He had lost sight of her, and now he didn't have a clue where she was. He considered walking back to History. Mr. Saix was going to have his hide for running out of class like that.
Suddenly, he heard a voice. A girl's voice. He peeked around the corner, hoping it was Namine, but to his disappointment and disgust, he instead found Marluxia and Larxene passionately kissing each other against the lockers. Weren't they supposed to be in their classes?
He couldn't help but smile a little, though. When the two of them announced they were a couple, no one thought it would last more than an hour. Two years later, even at the time he died, they were still going out. The fact was made even more surprising when you thought about how the two of them were fine examples of the worst people you could ever meet.
"Get a room you two, would you?" He whispered under his breath. Honestly, they were going to disturb some of the classes with their moaning.
"That's not funny."
Roxas stiffened when he heard Marluxia's stern voice. He was afraid to turn around, expecting to see him standing there, furious at him for eavesdropping.
'I'm sorrysorrysorry! I didn't mean it!'
But he soon realized that the upperclassman was talking to Larxene. The two of them must've stopped for air and were now arguing about who-knows-what. Wow, he sure sounded angry. Sure, he'd seen Marluxia get angry at Larxene before, but this time, he even sounded a little hurt. Looks like he and Namine weren't the only couple in the school who had problems today.
"It's true." Larxene's smug voice said. "If it's any consolation, I heard Parr's failing every other class. He could keep you company next year."
His ears perked up when he heard "Parr." Axel? Why were they talking about Axel? What did he have to do with this?
Marluxia mumbled the next part, and he couldn't make it out, but soon he heard him, voice raised to an angry growl, "-xtra help. You're right. Saix has it in for me. It's not fair! It's not my fault he's a crappy teacher! I hate him. I hate him for failing me. Me! The president! I'm better than the other trash in this school!"
Roxas thought over those words. He had noticed the tensity between Mr. Saix and Marluxia, but he didn't know it bothered him this much. He really seemed to hate him. What if he...
Roxas froze, a thought creeping itself into his skull. It was possible. It was definitely possible. What if he... No, he wouldn't. He knew Marluxia was a bastard, but he was also the school president. Parents and teachers trusted him. He had morals. He had integrity. He had-
Then he heard it.
"He deserved to have his goddamn yard destroyed, the bastard!"
Marluxia's voice, ringing through the halls, confirmed all of Roxas's fears. It was one sentence. It was just one little outburst. But it was enough. It was enough proof for him.
'He did.'
He grew angry. Both at Marluxia and himself. Of course. Why didn't he see it before? If he had known- if he had been smart enough to figure it out the first time- it could've been avoided. He wouldn't have wasted time. It all could've been avoided.
He knew Marluxia was failing, but...
"You did it, didn't you?"
Marluxia Finch was not having a good day.
First, his alarm clock broke, making him get up late. Then, all of the hot water in his shower decided it hated him this morning, and he came out feeling like an icicle. Finally, he had gotten back the grade for his History test last week, his worst subject. He failed it, which meant he had to work harder than he already was to bring up his grade.
Today was being a bitch.
But somehow, after looking into Larxene's electric blue eyes, all of his frustrations and worries were chased away, far away from him and his girlfriend. For a while, he forgot about all his problems and could only focus on her. She was twisted. She was beautiful. She was perfect for him. It was unbelievable what just her eyes could do to him.
The intense making out helped a bit, too.
"Mmm... Marluxia," Larxene moaned. "Why is your skin so cold today?" Kiss. Kiss.
"Don't want to talk about it."
The story of how they got together was not nearly as romantic or as complicated as you might imagine.
They had the same last name. That was it. Marluxia and Larxene Finch.
It was purely by coincidence. They were not siblings, though a lot of people tended to think that they were. Everyone in school was pairing them together already, so it was only a matter of time before they became an item. Everyone was appalled to say the least that the alleged siblings were now engaged in an incestuous relationship, but they eventually stopped caring. He didn't care much, either. He'd do her sexy body even if they were related.
Not that he ever did. Secretly, the two of them were still virgins in almost every sense of the word. They've never even French kissed. It was always mouths closed. Larxene had a lot more class and dignity than one would expect, and unfortunately, he did, too. The fact that their pickiness regarding sexual activity was most likely the cause of their staying together for so long both annoyed him and restored his faith in humanity.
That didn't mean either of them had to be proud of it, though. Larxene was always making herself out to be some sort of whore, saying that she'd done it with guys much better looking than Marluxia.
Better looking and packing more meat.
"Y'know, Smith says he's running for school president this year." Larxene managed to get out in-between kisses.
"Yeah?" Kiss. "So?"
"Well..." Kiss. Kiss. "I think I'm going to vote for him this time. I bet he'd do a better job at it than the crappy performance you've been doing." Kiss. "He's larger, too. I know. I've seen it."
God, he hated the damn bitch.
"Whore."
"Bastard."
She broke the kiss and slapped his cheek as hard as she could before pressing her lips back against his.
He hated her.
But her kisses were amazing.
After a couple of minutes, they had to stop for air.
"You disappeared after the party this weekend." Larxene mentioned as they stood alone in the halls. "What happened?"
Marluxia paused a bit, trying to think of a good excuse. "I went home early. I had to study. There was a History test today, and I'm failing." He didn't bother to mention that he had failed the test anyway.
Larxene laughed. "You were so drunk. And you live, like, twenty miles from here. How the hell did you manage to drive home?"
He shrugged. "Luck?"
"Pfft. Whatever. Anyway, you could study all you want, Saix is gonna fail you, anyway. He hates you. He hates any student that has power in this hellhole. You're gonna have to get left back and repeat senior year all over again." She flipped her hair over her shoulder. "Not that it'll do you any good."
"That's not funny."
"It's true. If it's any consolation, I heard Parr's failing every other class. He could keep you company next year."
Marluxia scoffed and looked at a locker. At a wall. At a water fountain. Anywhere but her eyes. "I'm getting a tutor." he murmured. "A private one. My mom's making me." He growled. "It's so embarrassing! I feel retarded for needing 'extra help'. You're right. Saix has it in for me." His hands were clenched so tightly, they bled. "It's not fair! It's not my fault he's a crappy teacher! I hate him. I hate him for failing me. Me! The president! I'm better than the other trash in this school!"
He shouted the next part so that it echoed through the halls. "He deserved to have his goddamn yard destroyed, the bastard!"
He shut his mouth immediately after saying that, realizing his mistake. He shouldn't have said that. She would figure it out now. She would know that he...
No. She wouldn't. On some occasions, Larxene could be as dumb as a post. She wouldn't figure it out.
But what if she did? Larxene would tell others, if she thought it would benefit her in some way. That bitch. What if she...
Then, out of a hidden corner of the hall, he heard it. A voice, confirming all of his fears.
"You did it, didn't you?"
He slowly turned his head to see the punk who said that. Some blond kid was walking out from behind a corner of the wall. He was eavesdropping on them! Marluxia would've beaten the crap out of him if he wasn't scared stiff right now. Who was this kid, anyway? He looked a little familiar...
'Hey, isn't that that kid who hangs out with Parr? Aw, shit. I'm screwed.'
Larxene spoke up. "Did what? What are you talking about, Strife?"
"I think your boyfriend knows," the blond kid answered.
She turned to face Marluxia, confused. "What is he-"
"Shut up, Larxene."
She stopped mid-sentence, having just been rudely interrupted by her boyfriend. She looked pissed. "What?"
Marluxia returned the look. "I said, 'Shut the fuck up, Larxene!'"
At first, she looked shocked. Then, she looked furious. "You know what? Screw. You! I'm out of here. I don't need to take this shit." Before leaving in a huff, she promptly flipped him the bird.
"She does this every day," Marluxia said to Roxas, rolling his eyes. "And..." He stared at him intently. "What makes you say that?"
Roxas scoffed. "I'm pretty sure people in Atlantica heard your little outburst."
Marluxia growled. "So you're a smart-ass, huh? What's it to you, anyway? It doesn't even concern you."
"So you did do it! You and Larxene! You two vandalized Saix's yard!"
The upperclassman laughed, considerably confusing Roxas. "Larxene? She had nothing to do with it. She doesn't even know about it!"
"You didn't even tell your own girlfriend?"
"Tch. Larxene is stupid. If I told her, she would go blabbing about it to everyone. Especially Parr. She'd try to confuse him by giving him clues, but he'd figure it out eventually."
"How'd you even know where he lived?"
Marluxia's laughter at that could be likened to that of a hyena. "That's the beauty of it! I didn't! I was drunk!" He laughed so roaringly Roxas thought that he might actually laugh his head off.
Roxas was getting nervous. Marluxia was scaring him now.
"You see, I was at a party this weekend. I had a couple of drinks. I didn't think it was that much, but apparently, it was enough to deem me unfit to drive. So I had to walk home. While I was walking, I wasn't paying attention and tripped over a crack in the road. I landed on someone's grass, but it still hurt like a bitch. Plus, I was just so pissed that they wouldn't let me take my own car home that I just started tearing the grass apart. As a nice addition, I kicked the mailbox a couple of times, too."
He said it as if underage drinking was a good excuse for what he did.
"Then, I saw name on the mailbox, and through my drunken fervor all I could think was, 'That's the bastard who keeps failing me.' It all took off from there. I guess I got a little carried away, though."
He wanted to punch him. He wanted to punch him so badly. He wanted to make him pay for putting him through all that crap a year later. What's worse, he did it with such indifference. Such arrogance. And he had the nerve to say this didn't concern him.
"You don't smoke." There was a cigarette at the scene of the crime. One that caused him more problems than it should've.
Marluxia gave a sly smile. "You're right, I don't. But Parr does."
"W-What's that supposed to mean?" he asked.
"Surprised your little friendly there is a smoker?"
Roxas was speechless. Not by the fact that Axel was a smoker- which he had figured out a long time ago, anyway- but by how much of a bastard Marluxia really was. Vandalizing Mr. Saix's yard was one thing. He hated the teacher as much as the next guy. But framing someone else for it was another thing entirely. And he had voted for him for president, dammit!
"Sure, not everyone knows that Parr smokes," Marluxia went on to say. "But they have to figure it out soon enough."
Roxas slowly backed away from the upperclassman. Marluxia stared at him.
"Where are you going?"
"Away from you."
The upperclassman furrowed his eyebrows together. "Are you going to tell someone?" he asked. "Do you think they'll believe you? The only evidence you have is your word. I have a cigarette, and I'm pretty sure Parr's got a pack at home to match."
Roxas clenched his teeth, realizing the situation. Marluxia was right. It would be pointless to tell anyone. Even if they believed him, what would it do? Get Marluxia a couple weeks detention that nobody would even remember the next day. If he had known about it the first time, it would've had a more lasting effect, but this information was useless now.
He had to know. "What did Axel ever do to you?"
Marluxia smiled. He really was dealing with a little kid here. "Nothing. It's just that I knew a little secret of his and used it to my advantage." He gripped Roxas's collar and pushed him into the lockers. "And there's nothing a little kid like you can do about it."
"Marluxia, I swear I-"
"What are the two of you doing?"
Both turned to see Axel standing there. He did not look happy.
Marluxia immediately let go of Roxas's collar and smiled. "Nothing. Why do you ask?"
"Nothing, really? Because it looked like a fight just now."
"Not really. We were just having a spirited debate. It's character building. Right, Roxas?" He wrapped his arm around Roxas, meant to look like a friendly gesture, but instead made Marluxia look like a sexual predator.
"Bullshit," Axel spat out. "I'm not as stupid as you think I am, Marluxia. I can't be controlled by you, and neither can Roxas."
Barely contained laughter suddenly erupted out of Marluxia's throat. He laughed as if Axel's comment was the funniest joke he had ever heard. It reminded Roxas of the evil laughter they often had villains in cartoons do, if any of those villains had bright pink hair.
"That cracks me up. It really does. 'Can't be controlled.' Ha!"
This time, he took all of his attention off from Roxas and focused it solely on Axel. "You really think you've got me cornered, don't you? You've got me figured out? You really think you're more cunning than anyone else, right? You hate everyone, don't you?"
Axel's response was a cold glare, amusing Marluxia all the more. "You could go ahead, Axel. You could go ahead, pulling out as many tricks from up your sleeve as you want. Go ahead thinking you're one step ahead of the game. Go ahead thinking you're in control- that you're running the show. It will make it all the more rewarding when you finally get crushed. When you finally accept that you can't pull the strings of Fate, no matter how much you think the world needs you."
"Go to hell."
"Gladly. I'll meet you there."
Marluxia roughly pushed Axel out of the way, walked to the end of the hall and turned a corner. He carried himself with pride and confidence as he looked for Larxene, so that they could kiss and make up like they always did whenever they fought. Which was everyday.
"You okay?" Axel asked Roxas once he was gone.
"Yeah, I'm fine." He looked down, blushing once he realized that Axel had saved him from a potential beating. "Thanks."
"I heard about what happened in History," Axel said, changing the subject. "Guess bad news travels fast, huh? What happened between the two of you?"
"Nothing much, yet. I'm still trying to look for her."
"No, I mean, why are you two breaking up?"
Roxas paused. "It's... complicated."
"I got time."
"Trust me, you don't."
Axel, knowing at this point that the only thing that could get through to Roxas's head was a brick, said, "Well, you better have a good explanation for Saix later. I know you're not doing well in his class, and skipping out like this isn't gonna help."
"Thanks." He left, and, against Axel's advice, did not go back to class but instead went to go look for Namine.
"Good luck!" he heard Axel call out when he was nearly out of earshot. Roxas stopped in his tracks.
There was no way.
'Good luck in History!'
"It was you." he whispered to himself. It was one discovery after another, wasn't it? He turned around. "Axel, wait!" Axel was already halfway down the hall.
"The note. The skateboard. That was you, wasn't it?" His skateboard. The one he died on while skating to Twilight. Axel gave it to him. How ironic.
Axel's eyes widened and his face turned as red as his hair. "I-I have no idea what you're talking about!" Axel was stuttering. This once in a lifetime moment should have been recorded for future generations.
"You know your smiley faces really suck, right?"
"I-I-"
Anything he said after that was drowned out by the sound of an annoying, upbeat, polyphonic ring tone. Axel growled in irritation and suddenly produced a cell phone from his pocket.
"Piece of shit!"
Axel obviously had little technological experience, Roxas observed, as he randomly pressed buttons on the number pad. After realizing that no matter what he did, he couldn't get it to stop ringing, he let Roxas turn off the phone.
"I don't know why my mom keeps getting me these pricey things!" he shouted once it got quiet again. "They're complicated as hell and it's not like I need them anyway. She should spend her money on more important things."
Roxas remembered something.
"My mom just got fired from her job, and we're tight on money right now. It's really tough."
Axel had said that that was the reason he had taken up smoking.
"Why? Because she got fired?"
Axel shot him a look that said, 'Are you psychic or something?' "How did you know about that?"
Roxas paled. Ah! He had forgotten that Axel hadn't told him yet! Stupidstupidstupid! How is he supposed to explain this?
"Uh... I just guessed. B-Because when you get fired... uh... y-you don't get money."
'When you get fired, you don't get money? Is that really all I can think of?'
Axel seemed wary about it at first, but after concluding that there was no way he could've known, he chuckled. "Well, in that case, I'm screwed, aren't I? 'Cause I just told you."
Axel glanced at the now silent phone in his hand with a mixture of disgust and regret.
"I just wish she'd take better care of herself."
Roxas couldn't help it. "Aww," he said. "You actually care about her." At this moment, Axel reminded him of a little kid who overreacted every time his mommy got a cold. It was a rare, innocent, almost child-like side of Axel's personality. Aww-ing, however, did not fit in with Roxas's image, and he hoped Axel would perceive it as teasing.
Luckily, he did. "Shut it! It's just so I don't have to! I'd appreciate a simpler cell phone, anyway. Even better if it's not new and it's been used by someone who doesn't want it anymore. That way it wouldn't be so expensive. All it would ever do is call and take calls, not play music or surf the internet or shit. And it would be easy to understand and use. Even for an idiot like me. She never gets me things I want."
All Roxas could say was, "You're not an idiot."
"I am, but thanks."
Axel had given him encouragement when he was the one who needed encouragement the most. He had worried about his poor grades in History even though he had a much more serious problem in his own family. Nobody gave him encouragement. He had bought him a skateboard- a good skateboard- even though they were low on money.
Roxas thought about his 18th birthday party. His mother had thrown him an expensive birthday party even though they were low on money. He must've thought it was stupid to spend all that money on him and that was why he hated it so much. Silk ribbons may have had something to do with it, but he was pretty sure it was mostly about the money.
A wide smile grew on his face. "Axel," he half said, half sighed. Axel was a lot nicer than he had originally thought. Wouldn't it make sense that he started being nicer to him? He took a step towards the now confused older boy and wrapped his arms around his waist. Axel felt warm, like warming your hands near a fire. He leaned his head against his chest, suddenly noticing how much taller Axel was than him.
The entire upper portion of Axel's body flushed red. His mind was a complete mess. The hell? What was with Roxas randomly hugging him? Was this his way of thanking him for the gift?
"Roxas? Wha-"
"I'm really glad we're friends." he said, listening to Axel's heartbeat, which was beating a million times an hour by now. "Promise me you won't ever do anything stupid with your life. Promise me you'll try to pass high school and go to college." It would be enough. It would be enough knowing Axel, even for just the couple of hours left in this day, had tried his best.
"Promise me that no matter what happens, you'll keep living life."
'Promise me you won't throw your life away.'
Axel had managed to stutter a few words incomprehensibly before pulling himself away from Roxas. As much as he liked the close contact—not that he'll ever admit it out loud—he still had a tough-guy reputation to uphold.
When Roxas watched Axel walk away, he was a little glad he didn't give him an answer.
At least he didn't lie.
Every girl wished her boyfriend were more like a chivalrous knight from the Middle Ages. Even if she disagreed with this on the surface, deep down, she knew she did. What wasn't to like? If her boyfriend were a knight, he would never let her feet touch mud, call her "milady" all the time, and save her from fire-breathing dragons. Most of all, he'd never make her cry. He would be more likely to beat up the guy who harmed even the ends of her hair.
Namine was not an exception to the rule. She had seen Roxas follow her. Why was it taking him so long to get here? Knights did not wait an hour to save their damsel in distress.
She did not normally think of herself of a princess. That would be conceited, and Namine was not conceited. However, she couldn't help but feel like one held captive in a tall tower surrounded by a moat of tears, waiting for someone to save her.
"Someday, my prince will come," she whispered to himself, fingering a small flower she had picked from the ground.
"Namine?"
She looked up and saw Roxas there, looking tired and worn. He had looked all over the school for her and found her in the oddest of places. Near the dumpsters, where the smell could peel the paint off a door. After thinking about it, though, it was actually quite appropriate. She was, after all, feeling down in the dumps.
"Namine! I've been looking all over for you! I-"
"So the hero finally comes to save the damsel in distress." She interrupted him with a calm smile on her face. She didn't look angry at him at all, and she wasn't. She was just… disappointed. "Too bad, huh? That he was the one causing the distress."
"I know, and I'm sorry, but if you let me explain—"
"That was really embarrassing, you know, what you did to me back there. And on Encouragement Day?"
"Sorry, sorry, but—"
"Sorry isn't going to help, Roxas!" To Roxas's horror, he saw a single tear stream down her face. She was crying. Damn it, why did they always have to cry? "I don't want an apology! I want to know why!"
"Look. I'm sorry you were hurt. Really, I am. But if you just let me explain and not get so mad-"
"I'm not mad at you, Roxas," she sighed, rubbing her forehead. "And I don't want to argue about this. I just want an explanation. I mean, it just seemed so sudden. Why are you doing this?"
He knew the answer. He had thought about it all the time he was looking for her. Because, he too, when he pictured her reaction, pictured the tears and the hurt look on her face, and pictured the constant question of why, had wondered.
Why was he doing this?
Because he'd never know any other way. If Axel really loved him, if he was telling the truth, then this was an opportunity to see a completely different side to Axel than what he was used to. It was an opportunity to see what it felt like to be loved by someone other than family. It was opportunity he had missed out on before, and he greatly regretted it. And if Axel didn't really love him, or they weren't meant for each other, then so be it. At least he got to try it out. He should give Axel a chance. He owed him that much.
Experimentation was what it was, really. How often did he get an opportunity like this? To test out a relationship with someone without the fear of ruining your friendship? If it didn't work out, neither Namine nor Axel would remember a thing.
If that was the case, then why do this? Why break it to her like this if she wouldn't remember anyway?
Because he owed her that much. He couldn't think of anything that would hurt a person more than seeing the person they thought cared about them cheat on them with someone else. She didn't deserve to be cheated on, even if it meant breaking up with her like this. He believed that she would be much more hurt if she saw him and Axel together while she and he were still going out. Even if she wouldn't remember being cheated on anyway, it wouldn't feel right.
He knew exactly what to say. But he couldn't say it.
"I… think we need to see other people."
"Why?" Namine sobbed, crushing the flower in her hand. "Is it me? Did I do something wrong?"
"No! No, it has nothing to do with you. It's about me. This is mostly for me."
"You?" she asked incredulously. "You think you're the only one being affected here?"
That was when Roxas realized his mistake. He had been thinking of reasons solely for himself. He hadn't thought about how Namine would feel about it. She didn't know the entire situation. Of course she'd be confused. Now he pitied her for having to deal with him. How utterly selfish and thoughtless of him. Maybe she'd be better off without him after all.
"I thought we were happy together." She pulled a petal from the crushed flower she held.
"We were!" he said desperately. How was he supposed to explain to her that this was only for her own good?
"I was hoping we would stay together forever." She said it so softly, daydreaming about their potential future, as she often did.
"I was always kind of hoping that we would be one of those couples who had something special." She pulled the second petal off. "One of those couples where you can tell your kids that you met each other in high school and stayed together ever since."
She daydreamed about it a lot. They would've made a great married couple. She thought she found her niche, a place she was comfortable in. She thought she was lucky to find it so early in her life. But maybe she wasn't one of those lucky little girls in fairytales.
"But now, you're just ending it?" The third petal was gone. "Without even asking me how I feel about it? You... You... bastard!"
Namine never cursed.
It would've been better if they had just argued with each other. If both of them had wounded the other in some way. Because this—him trying to explain why he did what he did without revealing too much and her listening to it all but not understanding any of it—made him the bad guy.
"I don't love you!"
Namine widened her eyes and placed her hands over her mouth. She didn't mean to get so angry at Roxas. She just wanted a proper explanation. She didn't mean to call him that. B-But why would he say something like that? And so spitefully! She pulled the fourth petal.
Where did they go wrong?
Roxas, realizing the effect of his words on her, immediately took it back.
"I-I mean... I'm not even sure what love is. You're the first—and only—person I've ever dated. I've never been with anyone else."
"Neither have I!" She kept crying those bitter tears that streamed down her frowning face and stained her pretty white clothes. Roxas wiped them off her face. No matter how many times he wiped, however, they kept getting replaced. He wondered if that was how Namine felt right now. Replaced. But then again, how could she? He never said he was getting together with anyone else.
"If we just stay together forever," he asked her, "without ever seeing other people, how would we know for sure that we're the ones meant for each other?"
'Come to think of it, how did Axel know?'
He decided not to worry too much about it, and brought his mind back to the problem at hand. Namine had two years to be with him, and he enjoyed the time they spent together. He died as her boyfriend. It was too late to change that. He just wanted to see what it would be like to be with someone else. How things would be different. If anyone was going to get hurt in the long run, it was him.
'Think Namine. Think of how we got together in the first place.'
When he and Namine had first met, they both found each other to be decent-looking people with decent personalities, and they had immediately befriended each other. One day, he asked her out, and she said yes. Why would they agree to go on a date? Because they were in love? Nope. Because they wanted to try it out. They wanted to see if it would work. Why couldn't Namine see that there were billions of people in the world, and any one of them could be your soul mate? You'll never be certain who that person was if you stayed put.
It was hard for Namine to accept that. You're only put on this Earth for one lifetime. You don't have time to look through the entire world. Why waste time looking for your soul mate when you're fine where you are? Why not settle for good enough?
She stopped herself, her thoughts catching up with her. What was she thinking? That's wasn't how fairytale romances were supposed to be. You weren't supposed to settle for anything less than the person you loved.
She pulled the last petal off the flower. 'He loves me not.'
"So that's it, then?" she choked out. "We're going to see other people?"
He nodded solemnly.
"But what if we are meant for each other? What if we never find someone else?"
He smiled at the possibility. He died dating the person he was meant for. "Good for us, then."
Even though she had to agree with him, tears wouldn't stop coming out from Namine's eyes. "As long as you're happy," she said.
Of course. Every fairy tale had to have an ending.
He held her like he would if they were still dating. "Don't cry, Namine." He soothed her, lightly rubbing her back.
Then, softly, too soft for her to hear, "Besides, by tomorrow, you won't remember any of this, anyway."
'He's crazy. He's out of his shittin' mind.'
Axel stood in front of his house, wondering what drugs Roxas was taking today. He was acting strange lately. First, he broke up with Namine. Then, he got all touchy-feely with him at school. And now he does something like this?
The question was innocent enough. The two of them were walking home from school. (Namine was nowhere to be found. She must've still been upset.) Roxas kept smiling at him for some reason, which was a nice change in his usually grumpy personality, (Not that he didn't like grumpy Roxas. Whenever Roxas got mad or irritated, his face would turn reddish-pink and his hair would stick up more than it usually did. Was it weird that he noticed these things?) but it was oddly suspicious. He had to wonder what he was up to.
"Hold on, I need to get something at the store." he had said, running off in another direction. The store must've had a slow day today, because Roxas had managed to buy whatever he wanted to buy and get it to his door before he had.
How did he know? There were two wrapped gifts left at his door.
A Post-It note was attached. It read, "Good luck with everything that you do! -Your best friend." Next to it was a picture of a small cartoon fire with a smiley face. The message was typed, so you wouldn't be able to tell who sent the gifts by the handwriting.
So how did he know it was Roxas? Besides the best friend comment, (Which, as soon as he read it, gave Axel an unusual warm feeling at the pit of his stomach.) when he unwrapped the first box, he found it was a package of sea-salt ice cream. Only Roxas knew where to buy that flavor.
Only when he opened the second gift did he realize the true extent of his friend's craziness today.
It was a used cell phone. Simple and exactly the type he asked for.
'He's crazy.'
Why would he do this? Why would he do any of the things he did at school today? Breaking up with Namine? Namine? And hugging him, saying he was glad they were friends, making him promise-
'-I won't kill myself.'
Did Roxas like him or something? He blushed slightly at the thought.
Nah. Impossible.
Still, he should ask him about everything tomorrow. And thank him for the gift. It was way better than his lame-ass gift. He had to thank him for that, even if he usually never thanked anybody for anything.
'If I remember,' he thought with a smirk as he opened the door to his house and walked inside.
Too bad he won't.
(...END OF CHAPTER...)
Author's Notes #2: Again, nothing much to say here. If you have something to say about this chapter, then please review! Must I direct you to the "Go" button once again?
One thing I can say: This chapter is abnormally long. I did not count on this chapter being this long. Don't expect the next chapter to be this freakishly long. (If I get enough reviews, I may consider making a different chapter this long. )
(Oh, Hayner. How I wish I had given you, Pence, and Olette more of a role in this story.)