ummm yeah...

They shared a small breakfast before Katniss walked Peeta out to the gates of Victor's Village. They parted with a soft kiss, Peeta heading to the bakery construction and Katniss back to Haymitch's house. She needed to change into regular clothes and collect her gear for her hunting routine.

She expected the unwanted commentary as soon as she saw Haymitch sitting at the kitchen table.

"Have a nice sleepover sweetheart?"

"You could say so," she said handing him the plate of scrambled eggs and bacon she saved for him.

Haymitch took the plate and asked, "Am I missing something here?"

"Probably. If you're not snoring, you're busy getting wasted," Katniss stated as she sat across from him.

Haymitch raised an eyebrow, "The boy came back six months ago. Isn't it still too early to be playing house?"

Katniss shrugged.

She knew Haymitch's trepidation was validated by many reasons. She and Peeta had jumped into being something after two years after being nothing. She accepted that she had never been sure of anything when it came to him, except that she had always been willing to die for his safety. Haymitch knew this, so here he was questioning her newfound certainty.

How could she explain it was not newfound?

She hadn't known what she had, until it was gone… or in years before when it was taken.

She wouldn't make that mistake again.

"I know what I'm doing Haymitch," she said with tenacity.

Haymitch stared her in the eyes for seconds too long.

"I hope you do."

Katniss masked the sting of the statement.

She only nodded and sauntered toward the stairs, while he finished his breakfast.

She sat on a large branch, the tree bark steady against her back. She held a secret in her palm, stroking it with the fingers of her other hand. Her pearl. The one Peeta gave her years ago, in a strangely serene moment during the Quarter Quell.

It was their tangible token of what life had been and what it became. She had grasped it in desperation during the rebellion and in desolation afterwards. She wasn't sure what comfort she was trying to attain from it now.

She knew though, at least subconsciously that it had to do with last night's thoughts. She was scared that what she had with Peeta was too good to be true. She hated how easily the worries came back with force when he wasn't around.

It was delusional, but she believed the pearl held a supernatural invocation. The pearl symbolized a connection to Peeta and as long as she possessed it, he would always come back to her. It didn't matter how long it took, but he would come back. He always had.

She sighed and closed her eyes. She needed to express her feelings to him. She needed to say more than she had yesterday. She couldn't be afraid anymore. She knew how she felt about him and it was time she said it out loud.

After their trio dinner at Peeta's, she let Haymitch quietly know she was staying over again. He grumbled and shook his head in disapproval, before leaving to his house. Peeta smiled when she revealed her sleepwear and toothbrush.

They worked on the book and had tea before bedtime. She tried to say it then, but she choked on her words. Peeta asked her if she was okay, she lied answering the tea was too hot.

It was not until she was in his arms with the lights turned off, that she felt she could begin to speak her confession.

She turned in his arms, facing him. The pensive expression on his features stopped her, instead she reached her up and caressed his cheek.

"What are you thinking about?"

Peeta began, "I just-"

He stopped and shook his head. He gave her a small smile, "It's nothing."

Katniss kept the brush of her thumb on his skin, "You can tell me anything."

Peeta hesitated, but finally began, "It's just that I've been thinking about last night and what we said."

Katniss stilled her hand at his somber tone, "What about it?"

Peeta remained silent.

She lowered her hand and reached for one of his. She entwined it in both of hers, away from where it rested on her waist.

"Please, trust me."

Peeta sighed, "I want to Katniss and that's what I've been thinking about... I'm not sure I do."

She had not expected that.

There was a long pause and she was already withdrawing into herself.

"Last night what you said about belonging to each other… I've wanted to hear that for so long Katniss. It wasn't until this moment that I started to think…it's just that this. You and me being here, it seems too good to be true."

She opened her mouth to respond, but he cut her off and continued.

"I spent two years fighting to recover every piece of me that Snow didn't decimate. I'm still fighting through the flashbacks and through the voice in the back of mind that tells me not to trust you. It's not that I still think you're trying to kill me. It's more like I can't trust you not to break my heart again. It sounds so pathetic, but it's the truth. I guess I'm scared to trust that you to want this as much as I do."

Katniss couldn't hold Peeta's gaze, so she looked down to their tethered hands. She didn't know how to react, his words pierced deep. She didn't know why it hurt, when he was voicing thoughts she already had.

She took a deep breath and looked back to him.

She wasn't a kid anymore. She wouldn't get upset and try to hurt Peeta back with her own words of doubt. She was trying to understand and provide the reassurance he needed.

"Snow took so many things from so many innocent people, you most of all. It's selfish, but I feel like I only lost everything the day Prim died. She was gone and there was no reason left for me to live for."

Peeta watched her, waiting for her to go on.

"I have always known how to survive Peeta. I survived losing my father and my childhood. I survived every one of my expiration dates. I survived losing Prim, but every day since I have looked for a reason to live for. It wasn't until you came back, that I found it. But that doesn't mean I'll kill myself if you decide to leave again, because I'll survive that too."

She paused to observe his expression, but Peeta only stroked her cheek the way she had.

"It's just that I don't want to keep surviving Peeta. I want to live, to live and feel that there's more to life than what we've known. You make me feel that type of hope Peeta, you have since they threw you in the arena with me."

Peeta continued his caress, but leaned his face closer to hers.

"Katniss I need to know if…do you- you love me, real or not real?"

Katniss closed the inches between them and rested her forehead on his.

She closed her eyes and whispered, "Real."

And that was not enough, she braved the words she had wanted to say before this ordeal, "It's my wager against the future, because six months ago I didn't plan to be here. You don't have to fear that I don't want this Peeta. I want this to work, because I love you."

Peeta mumbled those last same words into her lips.