And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't wanna go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
When sooner or later it's over
I just don't wanna miss you tonight
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am.
~Goo Goo Dolls~ Iris
Author's note: Heads up. This chapter ends kind weird and abrupt. It was going to be one of those chapters that if it got too long it was going to be garbage. So I ended it where I did...but the next chapter will pick up right off where this chapter ends. It's a split between Natalie spilling out her feelings and Jay showing support to his sister in law. The beginning might be angst ridden, but I promise a much lighter second half with Jay and Natalie. Please please please read and review! I absolutely LOVE hearing from everyone and what their thoughts are.
With that being said...I watched Med for the first time after boycotting the crappy episodes that included Philip. I have two theories after watching that episode- one regarding "Big Red" (based on some loose spoilers I've seen) and the "kidnapper" who was extorting Rhodes. If I get extra time and can get chapters out for my other stories I might just tackle the Rhodes storyline...and if I can stomach writing about Philip and Nat...
Anyways, enjoy!Please review!
Natalie stifled a long yawn as the EL train stopped near the brownstone she and Will now shared some time later. She managed to walk the block and a half to their home. Before she could fish her keys out of her bag, the front door opened and Owen ran out.
" Momma. I missed you. Where's Daddy? I miss him Momma!" Natalie's heart lodged in her chest as she picked up Owen and headed inside.
" Natalie, is that you?" Helen's voice shouted as she made her way to the foyer.
" Yes. Owen, come snuggle with me for a minute," Natalie said in a shockingly calm voice.
" What's wrong Momma?"
" Will...Daddy was in an accident."
" Is he dead like my Jeff daddy?" asked a scared Owen.
" No honey. He's got some big boo boos, but they're taking really good care of him."
" I wanna see him Momma."
" I wish you could baby, but he's in a special room only for grownups."
" Owen, why don't you go finish watching Mickey Mouse while I go upstairs with Mommy for a bit?" Helen suggested.
" Okay!" shouted Owen, running into the other room. Natalie climbed the stairs to the master suite, knowing that when she told Helen what was going on she didn't want Owen anywhere in earshot.
The tears began falling before she could even reach the bedroom.
" Natalie. Darling," said Helen, pulling her into a tight embrace.
" I can't lose him Helen. I can't do it again. I barely survived losing Jeff...if I lose Will…" her words being cut off by racking sobs.
" Will is going to be just fine. He's stubborn as hell and a fighter. You don't think he'd give up on his wife and son that easy, do you?" Natalie shook her head.
" Do you want me to draw up a nice hot bubble bath for you?"
" No, I don't think so. I'm going to take a quick shower and then take a nap. Thank you though." Helen walked out of the room, leaving Natalie to herself. The tiredness was winning so she quickly hopped into the shower and got cleaned up. She put on clean leggings and snatched one of Will's clean shirts, inhaling the scents of his cologne and body wash as she crawled into bed, burrowing under the covers, her eyes closing before she hit the pillow.
When she awoke nearly five hours later, Natalie immediately grabbed for her phone, feeling discouraged when she saw no messages from Connor. She pulled on a pair of Toms then headed downstairs. Helen was busy in the kitchen as always.
" Good. You're awake. I packed you some food you can eat on the train ride back," she said, handing Natalie a paper bag.
" Momma, you leaving?" asked Owen, coming into the kitchen wearing his pajamas, fresh from the bath.
" I am baby."
" Give this to Daddy," demanded the toddler, handing Natalie a stuffed bear.
" Are you sure honey? You sleep with Cubby every night."
" I want Daddy to have him. It make him feel better." Natalie smiled as she tucked the bear into her bag.
" Daddy will love having Cubby. You're such a sweet boy Owen."
" Tell Daddy I love him and miss him."
" I will baby. I'll call you in the morning after you wake up, okay?" she promised, giving Owen a tight hug before leaving.
Natalie had just taken a seat on the train when she felt her phone vibrate. It was an incoming call from Connor. She hit the green button frantically.
" Why are you just now calling? What's wrong? Is he dead? Oh my god, he's dead isn't he?" she said in a rush.
" I called earlier, but Helen said you were sleeping. It's good news Nat." announced Connor.
" What is it?"
" His blood pressure is up to 75/60. I know it's still low, but the dopamine is working. The stress on his heart is being reduced and the blood and plasma are starting to be properly absorbed, albeit at a slow pace."
" Has anyone told you that you know what you're doing most of the time?"
" Once or twice. Are you coming back soon?"
" I just hopped on the EL. I'll be there in about ten minutes."
" Good. We can discuss his treatment plan for tonight and tomorrow," Connor declared.
" See you soon," said Natalie, hanging up. A large smile spread across her face, a sense of encouragement washing over her. Suddenly she was feeling ravished. Upon peeking inside the bag Helen had given her, she found a turkey sandwich, a piece of string cheese, a mandarin orange, and a bottle of flavored water. By the time she reached Gaffney, the bag was empty and she felt even more refreshed.
" Have you been up here this whole time?" Natalie asked as she entered Will's room. Connor was stretched out in the bedside recliner, a tablet in his hands.
" Lanik figured out where I was hiding and sent Goodwin up here to retrieve me. To his credit, it was a smart decision. The ED got slammed with traumas. I borrowed one of the med students while I was in surgery and made him give me real time updates on Will's condition."
" I appreciate it," she said, walking over to Will's bed. Natalie pulled out Owen's teddy bear and carefully tucked it under Will's arm.
" Owen sent Cubby to make you feel better. He misses his daddy and loves you," she said quietly, gently kissing his cheek. Natalie sat in her chair at Will's bedside then turned to Connor.
" What's the plan?'
" Nothing like diving right in…" Connor said with a smile.
I want to do another round of Dopamine overnight. If his BP and heart rate cooperate we'll reduce the amount in the early morning and titrate the dose. If everything goes well and he remains stable, I'm leaning towards weaning him off of sedation as early as tomorrow evening."
" Seriously?"
" That will have given him nearly three days in the induced coma. Obviously I don't want to keep him sedated as it's not ideal long term. By weaning the sedation it will give us an idea as to whether or not he's sustained any sort of brain injury due to the blood loss and cardiac arrest."
" Do you really think that's a possibility?" she asked, gently grasping Will's hand.
" It's up to Will honestly. Ideally after weaning the sedation he'll start regaining consciousness and begin breathing on his own. Unfortunately you and I both know this usually isn't a quick process. It could still be days or even longer before we see any positive changes."
" Are you on tomorrow?"
" No, but the nurses know to page me if there's any change in his condition. You've got my number. I'll probably check in a few times via Facetime," replied Connor, letting out a long yawn.
" Is it my turn to tell you to go home and get some sleep?"
" I think so," he responded, yawning again.
" Go home to your king sized memory foam mattress and your Egyptian threaded sheets," joked Natalie.
" California King," he responded.
" Pardon me," she said with a laugh, watching as Connor walked out of the ICU.