(I got banned on the Loud House wikipedia page because my occupation broke the rules somehow… I work at Home Depot. What, do they not like architecture? They say I need to change my occupation as a warning but they don't give me a chance and just ban me instantly.
The admin responsible for this is Jaylop91. Fair warning you guys, he's probably a cocky asshole who thinks he can do whatever he wants because he's an admin and probably has his thumb in his ass all the time… I'm sorry for getting angry, but this really grinds my gears.
K. Nuff of the bitchin', I've got this FanFic to write.)
Jack laid on a makeshift bed, his wings on his chest; next to him was Walt, holding a clipboard while wearing glasses; they were currently outside, on one of the branches of the Loud's tree.
Matt groggily opened his eyes, his vision somewhat blurred. He groaned as he sat up, rubbing his head. "My head hurts." he groaned. "I shouldn't have drank that much. This hangover blows."
"That isn't a hangover." said a voice.
Matt turned his head to see Lori, sitting on the chair in her pajamas. "Then what is it?" he asked.
"Lynn hit you against the head with her hockey stick."
"Hockey stick?" he asked. He looked at his hand to see a bit of blood on it. "Jesus Christ. I fucked up was I?"
"You called me a bitch and sent me an angry text." Lori responded in a somewhat offended tone.
Matt took out his phone to see some confirmation. Turns out he never sent the text to her; it was there and was ready to send. "I spelled 'poop emoji' instead of actually putting a poop emoji?" he asked.
"Apparently."
Matt sighed. "I'm sorry. I really am." he said in a regretful tone. "I'll be on my way."
"Where do you think you're going?" Lori asked.
Matt turned to her, a confused look on his eyes. "I'm trouble for you guys. I know." he told her. "I'm saving you the trouble by kicking myself out."
"Matt, you're staying here." Lori firmly told him.
Matt stared at Lori, as if an alien just bursted out of her chest. "What?" he asked.
"You're staying here." she replied.
"Why?" he asked. "I mean, look at me! I'm a complete mess! I came home drunk last night and called you a bitch."
"And threatened Lincoln to give you your keys." Lori added.
"Not only that but I smoke pot! Face it, Lori! I'm just trouble." Matt told her.
Lori closed her eyes and sighed through her nostrils. "You are trouble." she told him. Matt looked down. "You know what you also are?"
"A screw up?"
"You're family." she warmly told him, smiling a sweet smile. "Families stick together and we accept each other's flaws. We try to help them and get through the situation. Together. If you are an alcoholic, we'll get through this, and that pot is for your disease, right?"
"Well uh… Uh… Yeah." Matt nervously replied.
"Well then right now there's nothing wrong with you. When do you drink?"
"Whenever I go to that nightclub."
"And how often is that?" Lori asked.
"Not that often." Matt replied.
"Well then, there you go." Lori told him. "Everyone in this family has flaws. Lynn is too competitive. Luna puts the 'loud' in Loud house. Leni is dumb, but pretty… but also dumb. Lincoln reads his comics in his underwear-"
"What's so wrong with that?" asked Matt, cutting her off.
"Well, it's unnatural and also disgusting to see a boy in his underwear."
"Really?" he asked, cocking an eyebrow.
Lori's face flushed, knowing exactly what he was talking about. "It's different in this situation!" she told him off. "Point is, we all have our flaws and look at us, we're still together as a family."
"A perfectly, dysfunctional family." Matt told her. "That is truly an American family and the most normal of them all. An all happy family who's all happy, go lucky and loving is just too… wrong."
"I can agree with you on that."
"So, you guys aren't kicking me out?" he asked, standing up.
Lori smiled. "No. You're staying with us. You're living with us until you move out on your own. You're our second brother and we love you… Your family."
Matt stayed quiet for a moment, the words reaching and touching his heart. "Does this mean I have to change my name to start with an L and have my last name be 'Loud'?" he asked.
Lori chuckled at his silliness. "That's up to you."
Matt warmly smiled at her. "Thanks, sis." he told her.
Lori smiled widely at the sound of him calling him her sister. "Your welcome, bro." she responded back.
Matt chuckled before feeling his head again. "I need some fuckin' band-aids man. I got some serious boo boo's." he said.
"By the way, it's Luan's turn to spend the day with you." Lori told him.
"Which one is that?" he asked. "Is she the sporty sister?"
He sat back down on the couch and the sound of farting could be heard. He reached behind him and pulled out a flattened whoopie cushion and held it in front of him.
Laughing was then heard behind him as the whoopie cushion was taken right out of his hands. "Sorry to be a gashole, but I just had to start your day in a fowl way." Luan joked as she placed an arm on his shoulder. "I may not be the sporty sister, but I am sporty when it comes to comedy."
"...Who are you?" he asked again.
"Luan." she answered in a deadpan tone.
"Can you get me some bandages. My head is bleeding." he kindly and calmly asked. Luan grew a deadpan look before walking away, presumably to get more bandages. Matt turned to Lori who gave him a smirk. "I'm up for an unforgettable day, aren't I?"
"Just wait until April Fool's." she told him. "It is literally, full on armageddon on that day."
"...I'm scared now." he told her.
Matt sat on Luan's bean bag while Luan sat on her jester chair… thingy. She held a clipboard in her hand along with glasses. "So, Matt. What's up?" she asked, smiling.
"My head hurts." he told her.
"So, do you know why you're here?" she asked.
"What are you? Principal Walker?" he sarcastically asked. "What I do? Run in the halls? Leave class without a hall pass? Spray painting a dick on the side of the school and writing, 'Who elected Giant Douche for president'?... Because, that wasn't me… in case you were wondering." Matt nervously smiled.
Luan cocked an eyebrow. "Riiiiiiight." she skeptically replied. "No, you're here to discuss comedy with me. Tell me: do you like comedy?"
"It's alright." Matt shrugged.
"What's your favorite type of humor?"
"Dark humor and offensive jokes."
"Hmm. Mature humor I see." she said to herself. "Hit me with your best joke."
"I can't. I'll get arrested for pedophila and assault." Matt joked.
Luan chuckled. "Okay, that one was good. But seriously. Give me your best offensive joke."
"My uncle died on 9/11." Matt replied in a serious tone.
Luan grew a shocked look as she became instantly uncomfortable. "I'm… sorry about that." she said in a sympathetic tone.
"It's alright." Matt responded. "He was aiming for the south tower but hit the north one instead." Matt couldn't help but smile.
"Oh my God." she mumbled as she facepalmed.
She had to admit that was pretty clever of him. Tricking her into thinking he was an innocent before revealing that he wasn't. "I have another one."
"Let me hear it." she said.
"I hate it when I give my vape bottle to a child and I get arrested for child vape."
"Oh my God. I hate you so much." she chuckled.
"I like tryin' to bust a nut and have it land perfectly in the center of my belly button but it's hard to nail the trajectory, ya know?" he chuckled, giving Luan a disgusted look. "I'm also afraid that one of these days I'll cum and it'll land right back inside my dick and I'll get pregnant."
"Okay, so you can also do sexual jokes as well." Luna noted.
"Offensive, dark humor, and sexual jokes are my speciality… Though no one ever listens to me." Matt said the last part quietly.
"Lucky for you I'm an open minded girl." Luan told him.
Matt snorted through his nose. "I bet you are." he said to himself.
"So let me hear your best sex jokes."
"Alright so this man went up to this woman and raped her. The end." Matt lazily said.
"That wasn't a joke, that was just a short, horrific story." Luan told him.
"Did I mention the woman was a transgender man?" Matt added.
Luan busted out laughing. "Oh man! That's a good one." Luan laughed. "Give me another one."
"Knock. Knock." he started.
"Who's there?" Luan played along.
"I'm raping you." Matt began chuckling.
Luan cocked an eyebrow in confusion. "I don't get it." she said.
"It's suppose to be so stupid that it's funny. That's the point." he explained.
"Still don't get it." she replied. "Ya got anything else?"
"I got something in my pants, if ya know what I mean. Ha haaaaa." Matt pretended to laugh; Luan merely blushed and she sheepishly smiled and looked away. "It's my uh, it's my vape mod. I keep it in my pockets at all times in case I need to rip a fat one."
"Oh." she replied in a deadpan tone, her blush dying down.
Matt took a hit from his mod. "Aw yeah, brother. That's pretty sweet, man." he said in a deep voice. "Why're you asking me to make jokes in the first place, by the way?"
"It's a test I made up myself." Luan explained. "It's to see if you know what true comedy is."
"Did I pass?" asked Matt.
Luan studied the clipboard in her hands as she adjusted her glasses. "Not even close."
"God damnit." Matt mumbled. "So, now what?"
"Well, I'm giving Lincoln the day off today so you can be my assistant for a birthday party I'm heading down to." she answered. "You ever heard of Funny Business?"
"Nope."
"It's my own birthday business where I perform in front of children for the sake of entertainment."
"Do you get paid?"
"No." she bluntly answered.
"Then no thanks." Matt harshly replied.
"Come on!" Luan whined. "Where's your sense of humor? Get it?" she asked before giggling to herself. "It's for the children."
"Why? What have children ever done to me?" he selfishly asked.
"Please?" Luan gave him puppy eyes.
Matt stared at her with a deadpan look before sighing. "Fine. But only because I know you'll just keep doing that to me all day."
"I would've given up in a few seconds." Luan admitted.
"Fuck." Matt mumbled. "Okay, well when's the birthday party?"
"Not until 4 P.M. later today." she answered. "You'll literally laugh out loud. Hahahaha! Get it?"
"Yeah." Matt lazily replied. "So what do you wanna do before then?"
"...I don't know. I haven't thought about it yet." she answered.
The two sat in silence, trying to think of an activity. "You wanna have sex?" he asked.
Luan grew wide eyes as she blushed madly.
Luna walked towards her door and grabbed the knob, until moaning could be heard inside. Luna pressed her ear against the door and began listening.
"Oh, Matt. You magnificent beast… Harder…" Luan moaned. Luna grew an extremely disturbed look. "Right there. Yes. Right there." She began moaning louder now.
Luna slowly backed up from the door and walked down the stairs; the disturbed look not leaving her face.
Luan laid on her stomach on her bed, as Matt massaged her shoulders. "A little to the left…" Matt moved his hands to the left. "Yes. That's better."
"How'd you hurt your shoulders again?" he asked.
"Throwing pies." she answered. "It really throws off your shoulders. Heh. Get it?" she asked in a dreamy state.
"Ya wanna know what my favorite pie is?" he asked in a seductive manner.
"Creampies?" she replied in an equally seductive tone.
"I was gonna say pumpkin pies but creampies are nice to."
"Do you even know what I'm talking about-"
"Yes. Yes, I know what you're talking about." Matt replied in a deadpan tone. "Good thing you didn't take the sex request seriously. Otherwise it would've been weird between the two of us."
"Yeah…" Luan grew a sad look. "Didn't take it seriously." she sighed.
"I would've asked for someone to make a portal to get me the hell out of the situation."
"Oh!" she exclaimed as she stood up, causing Matt to hit his head on the roof of Luna's bed. "I just realized what we can do today!"
"What? Throw pies at people?" Matt asked in a dizzy state.
"No! There's this comedy club I go to. It's called the Chortle Portal! You can watch me perform over there!" she eagerly.
"I'm Mr. Meeseeks. Look at me!" Matt replied in the same dizzy tone, all the while his voice cracking.
Jack sat in a bar, a depressed expression on his face, as he rested his head on top of his wings on the counter. All around him were several other sparrows and even some finches. Behind him was a stage where a finch was currently telling a joke, causing every other bird to laugh.
Jack sighed before his order, a birdseed milkshake, was placed in front of him; though he did not care. He simply faced down onto the counter, concealing his face.
Down below, the actual Chortle Portal was brewing with laughter as Luan took the stage.
Meanwhile, Matt sat alone in a booth, having a disinterested look on his face. A waitress came walking up to him, a notepad in her hand.
"Want anything to drink, sir?" she asked kindly unlike the last one.
"Get me a Blue Hawaiian." he replied, not looking at her.
"Sorry, but you have to be 21 or older to order any sort of alcohol." she told him.
Matt raised a fake ID in front of her face. "Dwarfism." he lied.
The waitress looked at him confusingly before walking away to get him the drink. Meanwhile on stage, Luan held up Mr. Coconuts as she leaned into the mic.
"Say, Mr. Coconuts." Luan started.
"What is it, Luan?" Mr. Coconuts replied.
"What do you call a ball that doesn't bounce?"
"I don't know, Luan. What do you call a ball that doesn't bounce?"
"I don't know. I was asking you." The audience began laughing at the joke as Matt simply blinked, his uninterested look retaining. "So there's this blind man who walked into a bar. Luckily he wasn't running." Luan joked.
The audience laughed some more. "Ain't that the truth!" a blind, black man exclaimed in the audience.
At that moment, Matt's drink was placed on the table; he grabbed it and took a sip out of it.
"So these two people decided to go to the guy's house-"
"Boo! You stink!" shouted a heckler.
Luan stopped and looked at the heckler, whom was an obese kid with a tight gray shirt, brown shorts and sandals.
"I stink huh?" she asked the heckler with a smirk. The audience began booing the heckler. "If I stink- Hold on, I got this." she told the audience. "If I stink, then I don't wanna be near you because you smell like you just came out of the womb, sir. You look like it too. You look like you were born yesterday."
"At least I know humor." the heckler responded.
"You know humor?... Come up here, then." The heckler stood in one spot, not moving. "See, that's what I thought. You're all talk but no bite. You're like an autistic chihuahua. You think you're tough, the toughest chihuahua on the block and out comes a pitbull just walking all over you… Not so tough now, huh?" the audience began laughing some more. "Humor is a very delicate process, it's like Jenga. One false move and it call comes towering down like grandma on Black Friday."
The audience roared in laughter as Matt took another sip from his drink. The heckler scoffed as he stuck up his head the other direction.
"Tell me, do you have a favorite video game?" she asked.
"Battlefield 1." the heckler responded.
"Battlefield 1? What's that all about?"
"World War 1."
"Let me ask you: Have you ever fought in World War 1 before?"
"No."
"Then what the fuck do you know about Battlefield 1 then?" she asked. Almost immediately, everyone laughed as the heckler sat quietly in his chair, realizing he lost the fight. "That's all folks. See you around." she told the audience as she walked off the stage.
Everyone cheered her on as she walked over to the back booth where Matt sat, drinking his cocktail. "Nice job with that heckler." Matt said.
Luan shrugged. "I deal with them a lot." she replied.
Matt smiled before something caught his attention .He looked passed Luan, which also caught her attention. She turned around to see the heckler approaching them, an angry look on his face. "Oh great." she mumbled in anger.
The heckler approached her. "I don't appreciate being made fun of in front of everyone."
"And what gives you the right to do the same to me?" she asked, no longer in a happy mood.
Matt just stared at the two, the same uninterested look having not leaving his face.
"Not my fault I'm pointing out the truth." the heckler taunted.
"Ya wanna know truth?" Matt asked, catching the two's attention. "You look like you just came out of the womb yesterday. Smell like it too."
"You shut your mouth, kid." the heckler threatened.
Matt took a sip from his drink before getting up from the booth and staring right into the heckler's eyes. He stared at them for a long time, making the heckler uncomfortable. He slightly backed up as Matt just got closer; the adolescent just stared into the kid's eyes.
Silence filled the area between the two.
"I don't appreciate people making fun of my friends." he told him. The heckler backed up as he fell onto a chair; Matt chuckled as he jumped and sat on top of a table. "Ya know what motivates people?" Matt asked. The kid just looked at him with a slight hint of shock in his eyes. Matt just got closer to him and smiled. "Fear." Matt finished.
At that moment, Matt pulled out a hunting knife from his inside jacket pocket, scaring the kid, along with Luan. Matt examined the knife, almost admiring it before setting it on the table. He began to scrap some of the wood off, extremely close to the kid's arm.
"I think you need to be motivated on how to treat people with respect, ya understand?" he asked.
The kid gulped, not knowing how to respond. Matt suddenly stabbed the table, causing the kid to flinch. He began petting the kid's head, even caressing his hair before kneeling down to be eye level with the kid. He tightened his grip on the kid's hair.
"If there's one thing I learned through my time on this god forsaken planet is that you treat others with respect, no matter if they don't deserve it." he scolded him in a deep, yet quieting tone. "I learned that human life is sacred and should be treated with care. One false move, bucko and that human life is no longer sacred… it's scarred. Ya know that old Chinese saying? That human life is like a sheet of paper and all the negative effects we have on it is like a pencil mark? Well if you keep marking up that sheet it's just gonna turn into a giant mess, a huge mark that's irerasable." Matt got closer into the kid's face, which shriveled up with fear. "My sheet of paper is all marked up… do you want yours to be too?"
Matt continued to stare into the kid's eyes before getting up from the table. He grabbed his knife and grasped the kid's wrist and slammed it down on the table. He forcibly spread the fingers before playing the five finger knife game. The kid squirmed, not liking what was going on as Luan just stared blankly at the two.
"Don't squirm. You're just gonna mess everything up." Matt told the kid.
Almost immediately, the kid stopped squirming but still whimpered in fear, even shedding a few tears. Matt continued the knife game before stopping. He chuckled as he saw the kid's face drenched in complete fear and tears. Suddenly, Matt slammed the butt of his knife onto the kid's hand, who screamed thinking that Matt was gonna stab him.
Fortunately, the kid stopped screaming and realized that it was only the butt of the knife. The kid looked at his shaky hand, completely relieved that he wasn't hurt, before turning his attention to Matt; whom just stared blankly at the kid.
"Do you know what motivates people?" Matt asked again.
The kid just got up from his chair and ran away, wanting to get far, far away from the Chortle Portal as far as possible. At that moment, cheering could be heard as Matt turned around, to see everyone in the comedy club, even the waiters and waitresses, clapping and cheering for him. Matt chuckled before smirking; he walked over to the booth and chugged down the rest of his drink.
Luan looked at Matt, in complete astonishment.
"Nice, show." Matt told Luan.
Luan smiled. "Thank you." she replied, liking this new side of Matt.
Luan and Matt entered the house, being the only ones downstairs. "Thanks again for taking care of that heckler for me, Matt." Luan thanked. "It was a knife thing to do. Hahahahahaha! Get it?" she asked.
"I don't take too kindly to people being a dick to someone else." Matt seriously answered. "So what now?"
"It's almost 4." Luan answered, looking at the clock. "We should get ready to head to the kid's party."
"What should I wear?" asked Matt.
"I'll give you the assistant uniform. That's all you need to wear."
"What's my job?"
"Be an assistant, duh." Luan responded in a playful tone. "Your job is to just hand me props and I'll do the rest. Just don't go all overboard like my previous assistants. And don't get too cocky if people start laughing at you."
"I'm used to people laughing at me." Matt gave off a deadpan tone along with an equally deadpan expression.
"Actually, we have a few moments to spare. You wanna do anything?" she asked in a playful manner, as if she was waiting for him to ask a certain question.
Matt stood silent for a few seconds, still having the same look. "I'm probably gonna go vape in the bathroom."
"Oh." she asked. "Hey, uh, can I ask you something?"
"What is it?" he asked.
"What are you thoughts on… sex?" she asked shyly.
"It's alright." Matt answered, shrugging.
"You ever had it before?" she asked.
"Yep. I've had it a couple of times. Mostly from drunk high schoolers because god forbid a sober one would take one look at me and just slap me across the face and run away."
"I wouldn't do that." Luan casually mentioned, blushing a bit.
"...Okay?" Matt questioned.
Luan's blush died down before clearing her throat. "So, uh… What do you like in your women?"
"I'm not into romance." Matt replied.
"Say what?"
"I'm not into romance." he said once more. "I don't want to be in a relationship."
"How come?"
"Because I'm afraid I may hurt my girlfriend if I do." he started explaining. "Then I'll end up just like my dad. I value human life. I don't want to hurt anyone that I care deeply about. It'll make me feel even shitier than I already feel. We're all born human, no one is born good or bad. There is no evil in this world. There are no angels or devils. There's just… people."
Luan was moved by his words, knowing his deep, personal philosophy. "I never knew that." she told him before smiling. "You're a good kid. I can tell."
Matt smiled back. "Thanks."
The two stared at each other in silence before Luan spoke up. "So, what gets you in the mood for sex? Just asking." she innocently smiled.
Matt raised an eyebrow in response, unknowing how to response.
Jack jay walked across the road, his head down; he's had this depressed spell for such a long time that he didn't really care about his life… almost didn't care.
He turned to his head to see a motorcycle heading his way, scaring him.
"AAAAHH!" Jack screamed before flying away, just in time for the motorcycle to miss him.
Matt, in the assistant uniform, rode the bike with Luan, whom was in her jester uniform, grabbed hold of his waist for safety precautions.
"Where'd you get this bike anyways?" she asked.
"I stole it from some bikers." Matt answered. Luan grew a shocked look. "Don't worry, they were selling it anyway."
"I like it." Luan complimented. "Especially the custom license plate: Beating You."
In the back, the license plate, which was black with yellow letters, read: BEATNGU.
"No, it says 'Be Eating You'." Matt replied.
"You mean from that old horror movie from 2001 or something?" asked Luan.
"Yep." Matt answered. "One of my favorites."
"Take a left down this street." Luan pointed to the street ahead of them.
"Alrighty then." Matt answered.
He revved up his bike before doing a wheelie and riding down the road, the radio blaring at the same time.
Golly jeepers
Where'd you get those peepers
Peepshow, creepshow
Where did you get those eyes
Matt stood on the stage with the same uninterested look on his face; he blinked slowly. Meanwhile, Luan was riding her unicycle in her jester uniform, juggling some balls. She purposely missed one so that all of them would fall on her head.
"Gee. That sure was a strike to the head." Luan joked.
Every kid began laughing as Matt groaned in annoyance. "Can't believe I'm not getting paid for this." he said in a sour state.
"Now, who's up for some balloon animals?" she asked. Almost every kid began raising their hand shouting, 'Me!'. "Would my fair assistant please hand me the balloons?" she asked politely.
Matt walked over and handed her the balloons. "Go crazy." he sarcastically said.
"Ha! Ha! He's funny!" one kid said.
Luan turned to Matt and an idea popped in her head. "You think that's funny? Hey, Matt."
"What?" Matt asked in a monotone, deadpan voice.
"What did the giraffe say to the hippo?"
"Get out of my way you fat hippo?" Matt sarcastically asked.
The kids began laughing loudly, some even clenching their stomachs. "How does a beaver use a cellphone?" Luan asked.
"I dunno. Cellular data?" Matt once more sarcastically asked.
Once again, laughs filled the area. "What do ducks order at a lemonade stand?"
"Luan, I'm not getting paid for this. Why are you asking me all these questions?"
"Aww, don't be like your dad, Matt." Luan playfully said.
"Well the apple doesn't fall far from the tree and apparently this one got ran over by a lawnmower." Matt replied.
Every kid laughed out loud, while one kid ran out the backyard, a diaper covering his head.
"Speaking of apples." Luan began shaping the balloon into an object: an apple. "Take a bite out of this."
"No!" Matt harshly replied.
"But you know what they say: An apple a day keeps the doctor away."
"Not if you have Crohn's Disease." Matt sarcastically replied.
"Just eat the apple, pretty." Luan did an impression of the Wicked Witch.
"If I eat this apple, will you stop asking?"
"Certainly!" Luan did an impression of Curly now.
Matt groaned before grabbing the apple. Without hesitation, he bit into the balloon and it popped in front of his face, scaring him. He backed up until he fell into a bowl full of fruits, an apple landing in his hands. "Hey, I found your apple." he told Luan.
Every kid began laughing, even the parents as well. "Oh my God, Sharon. I am literally dying!" one woman replied.
"I know, right Roberta!" Sharon replied.
"No, I'm literally dying! I was diagnosed with Stage 4 Breast Cancer!" Roberta told her.
"Oh my God, Roberta! You are hilarious!" Sharon told her as she began laughing while holding her friend's shoulder.
"Fuck you too, Sharon." Roberta told her before walking away.
Matt and Luan arrived at the house as Matt stopped the engine. The two got off and bean walking to the house until Luan stopped him.
"Tell me that wasn't fun." Luan playfully told Matt.
"It wasn't fun." Matt obliviously said.
Luan grew a deadpan look. "I didn't mean it literally."
"Oh. Whoops." Matt apologized.
"Maybe the next time I give Lincoln a day off, you can be my assistant?" she offered.
"We'll see." he replied.
The two began walking towards the house; at that moment, Luan began pondering about something. She's been wanting to ask him the question ever since the day started but was too afraid to ask. She decided it was now or never and exhaled through her mouth.
"Hey, Matt." Luan said.
"Hm?" Matt responded, his eyes still on the house.
"Remember when you went shopping with Leni the other day?"
"Yeah?"
"Well… When I came downstairs for a glass of water that night, I saw you on the couch, sleeping. And then you sat up and screamed, 'Keegan'." Luan responded. Matt stopped in his tracks as did Luan. "Who's Keegan?"
Matt turned to Luan, having a terrified look on his face, as if he just saw a box of full of kittens get murdered. Luan gave him a confused look, as well as a look of regret. Matt then suddenly grasped Luan's shoulders, his terrified expression retaining.
"Luan," he began. "my parents abused me. Physically, mentally, psychologically, and even sexually. They would locked me in the basement and feed me nothing but fish heads for years. My mom neglected me and called me horrible names and even used to hit me. My dad used to beat me with a baseball bat everyday just for not being a girl. My life was a living hell over at my old house and I hated living there and I wanted to commit suicide more times than I can count… but Keegan… Keegan was far, far worse than both of them combined." Matt explained in a shaky, fearful tone. Luan also grew a terrified look. "It's not just me… It's everyone. You're lucky you weren't in Royal Woods High two years ago. Keegan is a monster. A cruel, unforgiving beast with a black heart. He didn't only terrorized me… he terrorized everyone. Everyone is glad that he's gone. The whole group decided that it was best to get rid of them. Though some didn't agree on the terms but the faster we got that monstrosity out of our lives… the better."
"What are you talking about?" asked Luan.
"Ask any Junior or Senior at school and they'll tell you the same thing I told you." Matt got close to Luan's face. "He was a catastrophe…" he whispered.
He let go of her shoulders, a traumatized look on her face, as with Matt; he continued walking towards the house. Luan blinked several times as she stared at Matt walking away… Just… stared.
Lori and Leni were both in their room, with Lori typing away on her phone while Leni was reading a fashion catalog magazine. The moment was interrupted when knocking could be heard.
"Come in." Lori told the person behind the door.
Luan opened the door and peeked inside. "Hey, can I ask you two something?"
"Sure. What is it?" asked Leni.
Luan fully walked inside the room. "Uhm… Do you two know who Keegan is?"
The two grew shocked looks as they both stopped doing what they were doing. They looked at their younger sister with feared looks. This just confused Luan even more. "Uh…" was all Lori said. "Look! A flying giraffe!" she pointed behind Luan.
"Where?!" Luan asked excitingly.
She was then kicked out the room as the door slammed shut, locking could be heard behind her. She scoffed in an annoyed manner before walking to her own room. She entered her and Luna's room, a look of annoyance taking over her face.
"How come nobody is answering my question today?" she asked. She looked up to see Luna sitting on the chair, a stern look crossing her face. "What?" she asked her older sister.
"You two better have used protection." Luna told the comedian.
Luan cocked an eyebrow in response; a bamboozled look painted all over her face. "Huh?" she asked.