Joined: connected by a link
End of 5x17, post the "You're a lemon!" scene. There's a link below to refresh your memories if you forgot a few lines, it might be needed.
Suggested Song: A Message – Coldplay
"And I'm not gonna stand and wait
Not gonna leave it until it's much too late
On a platform I'm gonna stand and say
That I'm nothing on my own
And I love you, please come home"
"I'm not bailing. We're in this together" I yelled.
And I was in this. I was so into this that as soon as he slammed the door of the trailer and I sat in my car, I couldn't drive away.
He was angry, he yelled, he slurred when he talked, but he was still Derek.
My Derek.
He had seen me in the dark and he did bear it, it was my turn to support him. There was a ring and I was ready. I didn't want anything else but the ring that he threw with a bat in the woods.
The night was darker than usual, heavy clouds slowly nearing to form a storm and I was still stuck on his land, waiting for him to maybe come out and tell me he was sorry. Or yell more. Either way, he would come out sometime.
It hurt, being called a lemon.
It hurt, knowing that I wrote books on hiding, quitting, running.
It hurt, hearing the love of my life saying that I'm incapable of commitment but still, I'm out of his trailer, in the middle of nowhere, waiting for a storm.
I didn't want an out.
I didn't want to leave.
I wanted a ring, his ring. A lifetime. Dying at one-hundred and ten in his arms.
I wanted the same things, but he probably didn't want them right here and there.
I waited in the car for him, until the rain started pouring, the full force of the storm blazing on my car, heavy raindrops falling on the windshield while I watched and waited and watched and waited.
It was a soothing sound, something that reminded me of the many rainy nights spent in the trailer, in his arms, in our private cocoon, where everything seemed so easy and perfect and warm. There was a metallic roof between me and the torrential pouring rain then, something in between, just like I needed to put something between this fight and us.
I always said things I didn't mean while I was drunk.
I said to a guy that I loved him in college, after an epic Halloween party.
I said to my mother I wanted to go to Med School.
I said I was just a girl in a bar.
Alcohol does wonders to let you tell things you don't mean, it makes you believe things are easier.
I was sober and I was in this, though.
"Leave, Meredith, leave!"
It was the first time he really yelled in a long time. It reverberated in my head, in my body, in my whole soul, but I was still standing there, staring him down.
Because there was a ring. And I wasn't bailing.
His dark figure got out of the trailer while it was still pouring rain. He was a bit unsteady on his feet, a heavy, half empty bottle in his hands, probably from his stash of scotch, then his words broke the heavy pit-pat of the rain.
"Go home Meredith!" he shouted from the same spot, his voice slurry, broken, drunk.
I remained there though, staring at him, waiting for him to, I don't know, pass out, start puking, throw things again, my heart breaking for him. He sat on the steps instead -the same steps when he confessed that he was drowning and I saved him- and swig his scotch one, two, three times.
I got out of the car, the rain still falling but slowing down its rhythm, and I sat next to him, just like that night.
"Leave Meredith" he repeated "Go home" like a broken record. But I wasn't bailing.
I sat to his right, holding out my hand for his scotch. He stared me down carefully, wary, then handed me the bottle and I took a swig with him, forgetting for a second that the only time I liked scotch was when I tasted it on his lips.
If he wanted to get drunk, I could be in this with him.
I wasn't bailing, not anymore.
Derek Shepherd was my forever.
Link to the original. Just delete the spaces: youtu . be / d74kZbEjLYw
At first, when I watched this episode for the first time, I just couldn't stand this. After the bomb episode aired, it was tied with this on the scenes I couldn't bring myself to watch. And then somehow I did and I found so many wonderful things in that short clip that I had to write an Adjective about it. And Meredith yelling "Derek Shepherd, you are drunk!" was just priceless. I loved her in that. Somehow, this one, right there, it's in my top ten favorite scenes between the two of them. Deal with it. I just randomly re-watch it, an Adjective was bound to happen.
It doesn't really go anywhere, but which one of those one-shots does?
I had a hard time choosing the song as well, but I think the lyrics speak alone. I had a few other possible suggestions, if you want them just ask. It was a really last minute decision so I hope I choose right. And it's probably gonna be one of the few songs you'll actually recognize by the title only ;)
I hope you liked this and again, this one was short. I hope it was enough, though and the adjective wasn't random enough for you.
Stay tuned for K, it will be on a happier note, hopefully!