After leaving Jenna, House's team, with the exception of chance who ventured back to down to the ER, went to meet up with Hadley, House, and Wilson in the ICU where Wilson's patient lay unconscious. House scanned the patient up and down with eyes that appeared bored, but were actually fiercely working.
"Oh look who decided to join us!" House said in his usual sarcasm. "Well thanks to yours truly, the patient isn't dead, but you still owe me breakfast for a month for tardiness!"
"Says the man who makes his own hours." Foreman answered.
"Hey, I've earned them." House argued. "When you reach my level of brilliance, which will never happen, then you can make your own schedule. Now the patient! Forty three year old man, stage 2 rectal cancer, now in remission because of Wilson, but for some reason can't seem to keep down his own blood stream. Any guess as to why?"
The usual prattle of suggestions, either shot down by House's mouth or stored away in House's mind.
"Is he married?" House asked Wilson.
"Yes."
"Wife's Profession?"
"Hospice nurse."
"Blood Spewer's tox screen?"
"Negative."
"Good bank account?"
Wilson eyed him.
"How would I know?"
"I forgot, you believe everyone has a heart." House sighed. "Taub and Foreman, check the home and collect all the drugs you can find as well as snoop through personal papers and computers. Mostly likely Blood Spewer's wife has a other plans."
"She's been with her husband practically for every appointment." Wilson said. "What makes you think she's making him sick?"
"I don't think she is making him sick, I think she is trying to kill him. Lovers and big insurance policies make hot bedfellows. Chances are she is fighting for one, the other, or the whole enchilada."
"But the tox screen was negative." Hadley answered. "If she was poisoning him then it would have turned up."
"And you call yourselves doctors." House teased. "If she knows her way around a hospice and Google, then she thinks she knows her way of committing a murder most foul. Speaking of which, where is the dear wife now?"
"Probably where you want Foreman and Taub to snoop getting some rest." Wilson said.
"Mmm true…okay…plan 2…..if wifey is indeed home…check wifey's workplace, see if any inventory has been coming up short. Question staff members, you guys know the routine. Thirteen you keep running blood tests, urine samples, fecal smears, anything that could point out something is hiding in this man."
"And what are you going to do?" Hadley asked.
Before House could respond a page went off over the loud speaker.
"Dr. House you are needed in Maternity, Dr. House, Maternity."
"Maternity?" House said aloud.
"Oh no, House, who was it this time?" Wilson said sighing.
"HEY THAT WAS A ONE TIME MISTAKE AND PATERNITY TESTS PROVED OTHERWISE!"
Just then.
"Dr. Wilson, you are needed in Maternity, Dr. Wilson, Maternity."
Wilson made a face.
"Huh, I don't think I have a patient up there." He said.
"Why would they page both of you?" Taub asked.
"One way to find out." Foreman said and they all trudged toward the maternity ward.
When they got there they were met with an obstetrician.
"I'm sorry for the page, but she was most insistent that you both be told."
"Was she a patient of ours?" Wilson asked. He wondered if maybe it was one of his former patient's now in remission that had finally gotten well enough for children.
"No, she said that you all had an, experience, with her and something…just…well happened."
"Aw crap." House said turning the same shade of white as Wilson.
The team meanwhile hid a few feet behind House doing their best to maintain composure. Chase had also heard the page and immediately arrived to the ward just before House and the rest of the team had. Cuddy too arrived concealing herself just a bit.
"Was it that dancer back in Trenton?" House said. "I knew she was sneaky from the get go! Probably drugged both of us then used the turkey baster method for some scheme!"
"Um, could we do this privately?" Wilson asked, but the obstetrician just ignored him as two nurses in scrubs, including face and hair masks wheeling two infant hospital beds.
"She wanted you to see them first."
"THEM!" Wilson asked stunned.
"Oh my God!" Cuddy announced. "What did you two do?"
The two infant beds were brought right in front of both House and Wilson. Oddly enough though, they were just lumps hidden underneath a blanket.
"Here let me show you your new addition, doctor." The smaller of the two nurses said. With a gentle pull she removed the blanket. The taller nurse did the same thing.
"WHAT THE HELL!" House yelled while Wilson nearly fell to the floor. Everyone else in the room went up into a roar of laughter and the sound of cameras were heard.
Underneath the blankets were two little grey puppies, both wearing a baby bonnet and had a squeaky pacifier next to them.
"Congratulations gentlemen!" The shorter nurse said. "You are now both the proud parents of two healthy male, pit bulls!"
