AN: Am I on a roll or what? So here is where the actual plot of the story is being introduced, you know the whole driving force and reason why this story is going to eventually be the death of me?

I really hope it surprises you guys, I know I was kind of surprised when I came up with it... it's really unexpected...well I guess it's expected just not from the person you would think... it will make sense after you read, I promise.

Disclaimer: All rights to Mead

Rose's Point Of View

"Dinner was a really stupid idea." He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose and clenching his eyes shut. He was partially turned away from me but I could still see the tension that practically radiated off him. He was right, dinner was a really stupid idea but I couldn't apologize for instigating it - for instigating any of what happened - because it served it's purpose.

He was here now, standing right in front of me. So close that I could reach out and touch him, could put my hand on his chest and stand on my toes and kiss him. He was that close and after the months of distance, the months of longing, that was all I wanted to do.

"Yeah, well," I began, my defences going up and my lips uncontrollably opening like they always did for a snappy comment. "At least the food was good."

I watched his eyes open slowly and he looked at me dryly. It was almost familiar, he was almost looking at me like he always did whenever we had witty banter, except now it was humourless. Adrian's eyes weren't keen and fun loving like they used to be, he wasn't as careless as he used to be, there was a seriousness to him now.

I hated making the connection but it actually reminded me a lot of Dimitri. That strong, soldiery and pensive way that he looked at me was the same way that Dimitri often looked at the rest of the world lately, almost as if he was ready to take it on all by himself.

It was the hardened stare of someone who had seen way too much and lost far too much. It was the eyes of someone who felt so many emotions and had too many feelings that they couldn't express. It was the look of someone who felt passionately about something and was willing to fight for it, even if no one else would help them.

I knew that expression well, I had been known to wear it a few times and I often saw it on Dimitri's features.

It would be beautiful and haunting if it wasn't so uncharacteristic of him. Adrian had a brilliant way of looking at the world, sometimes it was dark and twisted but usually it was in his loving and artistic way. He saw things in a completely different light then most people, he often shed light on things that I rather have stayed in the dark. Adrian could see things that many could not, but he always tinged them in his light.

So this change was enough to throw me off. How could someone be sent away with one perspective and come back with a completely different set of eyes?

I knew the answer to that. Hell, I didn't even have to ask that question. Not to be cliched but if I had a dime for every time that I had left and come back with new views and mindsets, then I would at least have enough pocket change to buy Lissa a few new pieces of silverware. Actually, probably not, I had a feeling even the forks we were dining with tonight cost more than my house but that was besides the point.

"All food to you is considered good food." Adrian shot back, but not with the same enthusiasm as he used to. But that was to be expected, just like him coming back after months with a different perspective.

I knew witty banter wouldn't help us get anywhere and it undoubtedly wouldn't make what I was about to say any easier, so I decided that cutting to the chase was probably my best option. I had an idea of how he would react but I wasn't sure, I still had to try anyway.

"Look, I didn't come out here to talk about my appetite-" I began, starting to broach the sensitive topic that was looming in my mind. I needed to ease into it slightly, I couldn't just blurt that I made a mistake and that I still loved him, that I didn't know what I had when I let him walk out of that room months ago. I mean, I could just say that but he might just stand there and stare at me with that look, which would probably just make me ramble.

Sort of like I was doing right now…

"And I don't want to talk to you about that." Adrian cut me off, causing me to wonder if he was actually bring up the topic of our breakup. I pursed my lips together instead of cutting him off with my unprepared speech, deciding that letting him come up with an eloquent wording of what happened was better than me create something. "I want to talk to you about the trial tomorrow."

I couldn't help but feel disappointed. I didn't want to talk about Tasha's trial, that was part of the reason why we had both left the dinner, because things had gotten heated about the trial and a few other things. I wanted to talk about us, or the idea of us and former version of us and possible future of us. I didn't want to talk about Tasha, she was the last thing I wanted to talk about.

"I was thinking; I mean I know she did a horrible thing, trust me I know she did." Adrian began, his eyes cast downwards to the dark grass that looked almost black because of the lack of moonlight. "She murdered someone. She staked my aunt and it's inexcusable and horrible, I know that. But she thought that she was doing the right thing, she thought that she was saving people and that she was restoring our race. Tasha thought that she was doing right by our society, I don't agree about how she went about it but she was trying to be honourable."

I felt my eyebrows raising and my head tilting in curiosity, what was he getting at? He couldn't just be expressing his feelings about Tasha's actions, this seemed like more than that. If he wanted to talk about tomorrow why wouldn't he just confide in Eddie or Jill or Lissa? Why was he telling me this, maybe because even after everything he still trusted me?

"Adrian, I feel the same way…"I began, knowing that Tasha's actions were wrong but her intentions were pure. Tasha had been almost a hero of mine for a while, she was someone in moroi society that I related to and idolized. I thought that she could be the future of the moroi and the vessel of change or whatever. I trusted her and she betrayed that trust, it was heartbreaking but I eventually came to terms with it. Maybe that's what Adrian was finally doing.

"Good." He nodded his head and raised his eyes to meet mine. There was that same haunting look but this time there was a burning intensity in his emerald eyes, he had a blazing inside of him that I had never seen before. "So you understand when I say we have to break her out."

Adrian's Point Of View

Everyone knew this dinner would be tense, you had to be deaf, blind and in a coma not to know that. With all the underlying tension between the Dragomir sisters, the looming trial with Tasha Ozera and my turmoil relationship with Rose and Belikov, it was a miracle this dinner was even happening. All this drama seemed better suited for daytime television then a formal dinner, but here we all sat in ironed clothes, making small talk.

It was almost like there was unspoken rules set that everyone immediately knew to abide by. Everyone knew not to ask anything about that linked the sisters as sisters, we all talked about them as separate people with no intertwining pasts. We all knew not to mention Tasha or any of the Ozera family really and especially nothing about court dates. And absolutely no one mention anything about Rose and Belikov's relationship or my past relationship with Rose, we barely acknowledged each other's presence at the table.

These unspoken rules made conversation small and to a minimum, even talking about the school Jill attended in Palm Springs was a touchy subject, because Palm Springs was a touchy subject for me and Jill. Not that we didn't like it there but again, given the choice in the matter we'd both prefer not to be there.

So conversation went on dully, everyone just waiting till there was food so we could actually have an excuse not to be talking. I was just anticipating for this night to be over because sitting here at my aunts table in my old spot, without my aunt was painful. But sitting at this table across from Rose and Belikov in the silence was practically purgatory.

Conversation had hit another lull but finally the royal servers and kitchen staff brought out drinks and appetizers. I assumed Lissa had briefed them on what everyone had wanted to drink and have to eat because they never asked, but as the familiar faces who used to serve my great aunt began setting drinks around the table, I realized that all the glasses were filled with the same liquid, except for one.

The servers all placed crystal glasses with clear liquid around the table, each person glass obviously filled with water. Except when they got to my seat, instead of placing a similar crystal glass filled with water, I was placed with a scotch glass filled with dazzling amber. I sat stonily as the waiter, who I remembered from the times I spent having dinner here, gripped my shoulder.

"Don't worry Lord Ivashkov, we still remember your taste for scotch." He smiled and gave my shoulder a squeeze. I just nodded my head and thanked him for it before turning my attention back to the table. Everyone was watching, some with averted eyes and others more obviously as they waited for me to take a drink.

I'd be lying if I said I didn't want a drink, if I said that my hands weren't shaking to wrap my hands around the glass and my lips were quivering for a taste. I would be lying if I said my throat wasn't burning for it and that my mind didn't crave the relief of that amber liquid. I'd be lying if I said I didn't want the drink.

But I'd also be lying if I said I didn't want to fight.

I didn't want to cave or crumble anymore, I didn't want to take a drink because if I did then I would want another and another, until I finished the bottle. And even then I would seek out something else to ease the madness. I didn't want to stop fighting, I didn't want to continually disappoint myself and the people around me.

I wanted to keep fighting, except that I found myself getting ready to reach for it.

Except before I could any sudden or obvious move, a pale hand snaked out and snatched the drink. Surprised, I looked up to see that the hand was Jill's and that she had brought the drink to her lips. I watched in amusement and admiration as she swallowed the beautiful liquid in a few strong gulps. I would chaste her for not savouring the drink if I wasn't so proud and grateful to her for drinking it for me.

But I guess everyone else didn't feel the same way that I did because their faces were all filled with shock and surprise. Well, everyone except for Eddie's, he had easily caught on to what was happening and I was sure that if Jill hadn't reached for it then he would have.

"Mastrano, did you get sent to a party school or just been spending too much time with Ivashkov?" Christian asked, always the first one to speak. I watched as Jill flushed in embarrassment before returning the glass back to my coaster, completely empty.

"Adrian doesn't drink anymore," She professed quietly, her eyes darting to me and Eddie as if not to say anything. "And I knew that he would feel guilty after the waiter went out of his way to bring him a drink. Just doing him a favour."

"Adrian's a big boy, he can courteously tell a waiter he doesn't drink." Lissa entered, not even bothering to look at her sister as she spoke. Her voice was polite but she was so cold. "We don't need you getting tipsy in exchange for his sobriety."

I watched as Jill hunched her shoulders and looked down, clearly feeling more embarrassed then before. Things with Lissa were already rocky to begin with and Jill had set out tonight, trying not to give her sister another reason to hate her but I could tell from the way her face fell, Jill knew there was nothing she could do to stop Lissa's disapproval. And it wasn't Jill's fault and honestly, it wasn't Lissa's either.

Both had been put in a situation that was beyond their control and they were wading through it best as they can, no one expected them to become best friends in the near future and no one wanted to pressure them. No one knew how either of the girls felt and that's why no one said anything… well except for now.

"C'mon Liss," Rose jumped in, always ready to stand up for the underdog. I watched as Rose smiled at Jill and gave her a wink, wanting to make sure that nothing else got any tenser at the table. "I think we can let it slide, especially since everyone probably needs a drink right about now."

Rose hadn't meant her words as a jab against Lissa, she meant them to soothe the situation and hopefully put some tensions to rest. But with everyone on edge, it was easy to see that her words had the opposite effect. I watched Lissa's eyes narrow as she looked at Rose, who raise her eyebrows at her best friend.

Their bond may have ended months ago, but it was easy to say that the wordless communication between the two still existed. Being best friends and bond mates for so long probably intensified their connection and made understanding one another without words effortless.

Everyone else sat quietly as the food was brought out, intensely watching the pair as they entered what looked like a staring contest while everyone bit their lips in tension. I found myself tuning into their auras to get a better idea of what was happening between the two and when I did I regretted letting Jill have my drink, because it was practically a lightening storm of colours.

It would have made a beautiful painting. That is if I didn't know what all the colours represented and if the storm wasn't a hurricane that was about to engulf the entire room. I knew that the swirling and spiralling colours had been built up for a while, that they were stress and tension, sadness and fear. Neither woman felt like they were right but neither felt like they were wrong, they just felt how we all did really - lost.

And when we're lost we get scared and fearful. Of course we don't want anyone to see the terror, because that would signal weakness and we cannot afford anyone thinking we're weak - friend or enemy. We turn our primal instincts on because that's the only thing we can do, we turn into animals being caged or hunted. We're ready to run from anything or attack anyone that reached out to us, our fight or flight instincts are engaged.

Unfortunately for the group of misfits here, we're all becoming fighters.

We don't stop and think or question, we don't take that second to see if the hand that's reaching out is actually offering us a change to help or guide us or at least make it so we're not alone. We scratch and claw at anything, thinking that we're doing what's right and protecting the people we love, but what if we're just attacking each other?

In our efforts to protect the ones we love, we're really fighting against them.

Isn't that what we're doing with Tasha tomorrow? In an attempt to bring justice to the moroi - to the people we love, to the people who died - we're taking a friend, one who's no longer a danger to anyone and sentencing her to death? In order to protect the people we love, we're going to kill someone that we loved.

It didn't have any logic or make any sense when you put it in that context. But then again, a lot of what had happened lately hadn't made much sense.

The sound of a glass shattering broke me out of my daze and I watched the chaos unfold around me.

Rose was on her feet with Belikov right behind her, Christian too was on his feet and Eddie looked torn between blocking Christian or jumping over to protect Jill. Lissa sat in her chair with her chin held high while Jill cowered in hers, trying to avoid all eye contact with everyone. Just from glancing at this scene I already had an idea of what had happened.

If I could guess, I would say that Rose's and Lissa's conversation had actually translated into words, that Christian had shot back at Rose because his snarky comments were on par with hers. Words easily escalated between the two, Belikov and Castile probably tried reasoning with the Dragomir sisters watched wordlessly because this was beyond them.

And from what happened next, I knew I was right.

"What are you gonna do? Light my hair on fire?" Rose yelled at Christian, who just smirked when he raised his hands and produced a fireball in his palms.

"It's so dry it would make perfect kindling." He shot back, it wasn't his finest but it was enough to piss Rose off, which if I was being honest didn't take a whole lot.

"And you're face would make a good dart board." Rose sneered back, picking up one of the butter knives and with a flick of the wrist hurled it at the wall behind Christian's head. We all watched with wide eyes as the knife got stuck in the wall, knowing that if Rose really wanted to, that could have easily been Christian's head.

Just like I knew how it started, I knew how it would also play out. Eventually Castile and Belikov would calm down the two, there would be a few more jabs and then everything would be calmly resolved but there would still be underlying tension and dirty looks exchanged. Either that or one of them would kill the other, but I doubted that would be the outcome.

Either way, I came to the decision that I didn't need to stay for this. I had too many thoughts for one night, especially the one about Tasha and that was one that I would like to ponder alone. I couldn't sit through more courses with people who I used to know, with unseen emotional storms raging and people ready to throw knives at each other or light their hair on fire.

My head was already a mess and I was in the middle of the biggest fight of my life. I couldn't be there and sit through that without being pushed over the edge or actually having a drink of scotch. I needed to leave and I was finally going to do something right for myself.

So whether it was noticed or not, I stood from the table and left the room. I didn't look back and I didn't say a word, I was doing what was best for me in that moment. So with jumbled thoughts, I led myself out of the familiar hallways into the cool air and the moonless night.

Rose's Point Of View

"Are you drunk?" I found myself instinctively asking. I knew the answer was no, but that's the only explanation I could think of as to why he had just suggested we help a murder escape trial.

"No," Adrian told me dully. "That would be Jill."

I just pursed my lips and gave him a look, telling him that wasn't funny. He gave me a look in return as if to tell me he wasn't trying to be funny.

"Adrian, what you're suggesting…" I trailed off, not believing that he was actually suggesting we break murderous Tasha out of jail, that we set her free into the world. I cannot believe him, of all people, would be the one with this insane plan. "Is crazy, it's actually insane. We can't break her out of jail - she plotted and lied and, and she killed someone!"

"So?" Adrian shrugged, like none of the things that Tasha did were wrong, like they were everyday occurrences. "You've plotted, you've lied and you've killed. What makes you so much worse than her?"

"Uh, she killed the Queen, Adrian. That is far worse than anything I have ever done!" I was offended that he could even suggest my crimes were on par with Tasha's.

"She made a mistake," Adrian's voice was calm and collected, despite mine being loud and pretty much all over the place. "Haven't you ever made a mistake that you've regretted, one that you knew was probably never forgivable?"

His eyes burned into mine as I nodded my head. We both know that I've made mistakes, that I was practically the poster child for them these last few years. I was the last person to preach about being forgiven for mistakes since so many people had forgiven mine. I had made many of them and in that moment I wanted to tell him that cheating on him with Dimitri was that mistake for me. But the words didn't come out because this wasn't the right time, like at all.

"So are you with me?"

Adrian gave me that same haunting look with his piercing emerald eyes and I knew that with or without me, Adrian was going to break Tasha out of jail. He had come to this decision and decided that he was going to fight for her, he would do it alone if he had to. I knew that there was no talking him out of it, that there would be no persuading with him.

Adrian was going to do this.

"I'm with you."

So I figured I had to help or the idiot would get himself killed.