'My Trip to America is not as Expected'

Chapter 10: Starman

A/N: I updated this chapter's ending a little bit. I realized one part of the dialogue was really incorrect for one of the characters. Fault's on me, as usual and as expected.

The answer to my search for entertainment on the plane was looking at me the whole time. Yes, it was always there. And it took me about an hour in before I realized 'On a trip with my girlfriend, on a plane, this is what I should be doing.'

The thing that I found, the thing that gave me purpose on this plane ride was the television screen attached to the back of the seat in front of me. After I fiddle around with some buttons, I discovered that the screen hosted a vast trove of western movies, names which I recognized but I never actually saw.

'Now that I know English, I have no excuse anymore.'

I dug out some earbuds from my backpack ('Loner Survival Kit Item #1: Earbuds'), and plugged them in. I was ready to discover the bastions of western culture without talking to a single American on this plane.

A normal onlooker might observe my actions and say "He's a terrible boyfriend, ignoring his girlfriend, who's sitting right next to him"

However, if they actually took the time to look at the seat next to mine, they would have seen that Yukino had been engrossed in the screen for the past half hour, and was likely watching American-exclusive Pan-san episodes and movies. If they only knew the depths of Yukino's devotion to the star-eyed panda, they'd fault me for not being jealous!

'I'm just amazed that Pan-san may actually be a bigger deal in America than in Japan.'

So I browsed the plane's selection of movies by the directors ('The one true indicator of how good a movie is'), and came across a name that was probably mythical in some parts of the world, but had eluded the grasp of the East.

Stanley Kubrick, and a couple of movies he directed, popped up on the monolithic screen. Stanley Kubrick was a name I heard in passing, I imagine, years ago, so I guess I must have been curious. So I clicked upon the first result, Dr. Strangelove, and binged from there...

I loved it.

I loved it all.

I just had to sit back in awe for the movies I had just watched, from Dr. Strangelove to Full Metal Jacket...

Such great movies.

So great.

"Hachiman... What did you watch?"

I heard Yukino through my earbuds, since the movies were all done.

"The best movies ever made."

Yukino gave an audible gasp.

"Not better than Pan-san..."

"Oh yes... Better than Pan-san. I watched all the Stanley Kubrick movies this plane had to offer. I finally found movies that don't require talking to move the plot along so goddamn always. The use of visuals, perceptions, to convey messages as masterly as he did, especially in 2001... It's amazing."

"Hmmm..." Yukino gave a thoughtful look "I have seen the Stanley Kubrick movies as well, a while back. If I recall, while the movies were amazing visual spectacles, the characters were rather lacking in development, except for Dr. Strangelove... I think you like that movie because you can personally relate to inadvertently causing the apocalypse via Mutually Assured Destruction."

"Wha... I... I don't know how to respond to that, because I don't think what you said makes any sense whatsoever..."

"It makes perfect sense. Think about it."

"No... I'm thinking about it, and that makes no sense. You can attribute a lot of things to me, but I never have destroyed anything out of ineptitude... Nor has it been under the circumstances of Mutually Assured Destruction... Yeah, it makes no sense."

"Sigh... Oh Hachiman... I guess my jokes are of such high sophistication that a mortal with a mere brain such as yourself can't comprehend it..."

"I think you're just covering your ass because you realized that your joke makes no sense, but agree to disagree, am I right?"

Yukino pouted.

"You really don't know how to treat your girlfriend, Hachi. Any onlooker looking at this relationship would classify it as being abusive. I wouldn't be surprised if pretend knights in shining armor attempt to steal you from me."

I shuddered "Oh trust me, that's already happening."

"Really? I am very surprised by that. That implies that people actually had the gall to look into your rotten eyes and talk to you about it. How frightening... For them."

"Who's being the abusive one now?"

"Probably still you."

"Tch. Double standards. I see you don't have Pan-san on anymore. Did you finally get sick of him?"

"Never. I'm starting to question if you know me, if you think my devotion to Pan-san is that fickle."

"Of course I wasn't serious. I sometimes really don't understand your fascination with him."

She looked down and away from me, and in a quieter tone, almost to herself, said "You don't even know the half of it."

'... Odd...'

I decided to let her comment go, and perhaps in a semblance of irrationality, I decided to continue talking with my girlfriend.

"It looks like we have 5 hours before we arrive... I don't know what to do."

"There's an activity humans do when they have 5 hours of spare time. It's called sleeping. Of course, this would be a foreign concept to a foreign creature such as yourself."

"I expected you to have a better grasp of biology and classifying things, given you're supposed to be the smart one at science."

"I'm surprised you know that classification is a part of biology."

"Whatever. To answer you, I'm not tired. I allocated a large deposit of sleep currency into my reserves, and I currently am burning through these assets."

"..."

"You did get what I said, ri-"

"Yes, I did get what you said."

"Alright."

"Well, you normally have a book on you whenever we are in club. I'm sure you probably left one in your bag out of habit... Wait..."

"What?"

"Oh my.. I just realized that we just left the club unattended. We are the only two active members, and now we're going to be out of the country for an entire month..."

Yukino was getting flustered "All those who need their requests taken care of... How could I have been so irresponsible?"

I put my hand on Yukino's shoulder.

"Look, Yukino."

"What?"

"It's going to be alright. Most likely, the only one who's going to try and request our service would be Tobe, and honestly, the only person who can really help Tobe now is God. If anyone really needs our services, Hiratsuka-sensei would probably nag Isshki to do it, considering how she is practically our fourth member, and owes me tons for the free labor I have provided her. Worst case scenario, we handle the request remotely. I'm sure we have the capability and the craftiness to handle these requests solely through the internet. Trust me, the club will be fine."

A calmer Yukino gave a soft, small smile.

"Alright. I will believe you on that."

With that, I decided to search my bag for any books I might have stored in my backpack.

'Wait... I did get one book, one I've been wanting to read for a long time, but I could never find a Japanese translation. But because I know English now...'

I pulled out the Essential Works of Friedrich Nietzsche from my bag. Yukino looked over my way for a quick glance.

Then it became a stare.

Then it became a look of sheer mortification.

"Hachi... Man..."

"What?"

Yukino suddenly snatched the book from me, and stowed it away in her bag."

"What the...?"

"Hachiman, I, uh... Don't believe that you will find much of an intellectual pursuit in that book... I believe, for your sake, that it would be best if you didn't read this book."

"What... What's in the book, Yukino?"

"... Nothing..."

"Yukino..."

"I'm doing this for the sake of the world. Please pick another activity to spend time with..."

Yukino was looking around for a way to take my mind off the book.

"Ah! The screen! The media system here has a great collection of music that you can and absolutely should listen to."

"Oh... Kay... Uh, so what do you recommend?"

"Oh, well, I personally listen to classical, preferably Chopin, Bach..."

"Ah, this David Bowie guy looks interesting..."

"Oh, David Bowie, right, that- wait... NO, DON'T!"

But it was too late, for I pressed on the first track of David Bowie's that popped up, 'Space Oddity'. And once Ground Control made it to Major Tom, there was no going back.

By the time I finished my venture into the wonderful world of David Bowie, the announcement had been made that we were beginning our final approach to Boston-Logan airport, and we'd be landing within the half hour.

"David Bowie is pretty great, huh?"

"I'm beginning to realize that the worst mistake I ever made was teaching you English."

"Oh, don't be so gloomy. English has opened a new world up for me in the ways of being engrossed in media rather than people."

"Sigh... And here I was, thinking I was helping you, while in reality, I was enabling your regression. I have failed as president of the Service Club."

Suddenly, I felt the plane's landing gear pull out from its underside, and within minutes, I felt the collision that meant we were now in America.

"From all of us here at NNA, we welcome you to America. Enjoy Boston!"

We taxied to the gate, and with our advantageous first class positioning, we were able to get off the plane and into the long white walking hall to get to the gate.

"I just realized something, Hachiman."

"What?"

"We didn't get any information about our hotel arrangements."

"So... Does this mean that we don't have anywhere to stay? Will we have to ride around on buses and hitchhike our way into a place where we can live together?"(1)

"I'm sure it's nothing that drastic. I feel that Hiratsuka-sensei, for all her faults, planned well enough to get us a place to stay."

"Whatever you say."

We stepped through the door, and what we saw was the standard airport scene, found at any airport that's not some regional shantytown. The rush of people to find their gates, announcements claiming that it's the last call for boarding, when in reality, they will use the next 30 minutes to herd in all the stragglers, and stuffed seating areas.

But there was something wrong with this scene. Something very different... Something that shouldn't be there."

We walked forward a couple of paces before the oddity notified us of her presence.

"Welcome to America Yuki-chan and Hachi-kun!~."

A/N: We *finally* are in America, and we get a new character to enjoy too, while we're at it. Thank you all for putting up with me as long as you have, and I can't wait to deliver more chapters to you all. Until then, thank you, thank you, thank you!

Also, Rest in Peace David Bowie.

(1): A reference to Weewah's ongoing story, 'End of the World'.

If you're reading this, Weewah, 8mangelion is still on the table.