Friday January 2nd, 2013
Kurt and I are definitely talking more freely now. We're obviously still not back to whatever someone could consider as normal, but we're getting close. We spent a lot of break talking about Kurt entering NYADA and his nerves about that as well as his concerns about his dad. And then. We talked about what I was planning on auditioning for NYADA with. We also caught up a bit on what happened during "The Dark Time" as Kurt has decided to name it. It's been really good. Being able to talk to him more freely again has made it easier to work on forgiving myself for what I did. It's also just made me happier because Kurt always makes me happy.
On the McKinley front, Sam spent the last week doing research and he thinks the Warblers cheated at Sectionals. He suspects them of using steroids and noticed that Trent was missing from their ranks. I don't want to believe him because those guys used to be my family and I can't believe they would do something like that, but ever since Sebastian showed up they've gone downhill. He needs more proof but I think it actually might turn out to be something. Some of those Warblers definitely couldn't pull of those flips when I was one of them. We're going to look into it some more this weekend and talk to Trent but I'm a bit wary of the whole thing. They're the Warblers we used to be the most respected team in the district.
Student Council has been going well so far since I got elected but today Tina decided that we are going to have a Sadie Hawkins dance. She knows what happened at my old school. I told all of them after Karofsky attempted suicide. I didn't tell them in great detail but they all seemed to lack an understanding of how horrible kids can be, especially when it comes to sexuality. Even Santana didn't quite know. She understood a bit, but she never faced the same time of bullying that Kurt and I did and do (although being outed as part of a political campaign is awful and I don't envy her that). It was odd how much none of them seemed to understand after having watched Kurt be pulled day in and day out. Especially seeing as how some of them were the bullies. In any case, I told them a bit about that dance, leaving out some of the more painful details and… apparently Tina forgot? And I didn't really want to bring it up because she was so fired up about the idea.
-Blaine
Tuesday January 8th, 2013
The Sadie Hawkins dance is officially a go. It's happening next week because McKinley seems to run on a really fast track as far as events are concerned. I don't think I'll go though. I don't have anyone to go with and… well, my parents would rather not have me go and I just don't feel up to going to a dance where everyone's going to be all romantic and I can't be. I, umm, I also think I have a crush on Sam? I know he's straight and he's dating Brittany and all of that but he just makes me laugh and he's helped me so much through this break up and his lips. I feel really bad about it though. I don't want to ruin our friendship and I definitely don't want Kurt to hear about it because I don't want him to think I've moved on. I haven't. It's just that I have a minor crush on someone else.
-Blaine
Friday January 11th, 2013
Kurt just finished his first week at NYADA and he sounded really happy about it. He's obviously still settling in and apparently Rachel wasn't around as much as he would have liked, but he likes his classes and he's working on joining some of the clubs there. It's kind of funny that Kurt's the one now looking into joining things after I spend all of September doing that. I hope he finds the right place for himself without overloading between school and NYADA.
He did sound a bit lonely because of Rachel not being around as much as he had expected, but he seemed to have a good attitude about finding his own niche, which is good. I'm excited to get to grill him for all the details that will hopefully come in handy for me in the fall.
-Blaine
Tuesday January 15th, 2013
Finn announced yesterday that this week is "Ladies' Choice." This means that every girl is going to sing to whoever they want to ask to the dance. I was really looking forward to hearing all of the girls sing solos and getting to see them be all romantic serenading people, but then today happened. Tina sang I Don't Know How to Love Him from Jesus Christ Superstar (the locker room, where we were rehearsing because we lost the choir room to the Cheerio's, has surprisingly good acoustics). I kind of spent the entire song thinking she was singing to Artie or Ryder or someone who wasn't me. Then she asked me to the dance and I just froze. Because Tina knows I'm gay and I just don't understand why she wanted to ask me to be her date when she knows that. After a moment I said no, and felt awful about it because I hurt her feelings. And turned her down in front of the entire glee club.
Afterwards, she found me at my locker and apologized for asking saying that she'd forgotten all about that story I'd told about the dance at my old school. Then she asked me to apologize to her for humiliating her like that. I didn't really feel like I needed to apologize because I had every right to say no to her and it's not like I went out of my way to crush her anything, but I ended up avoiding having to say anything because we got into a discussion about my crush.
She now knows I like Sam. It was oddly freeing to tell her, honestly. I told her that I had no intention of doing anything because I like that we prove that the gay guy and the straight guy can be friends. And then we sat in the hallway and had a moment of gushing about him because his lips and his impressions. Ahem. Anyway. Tina and I are now going to the dance as best friends. I'm kind of looking forward to it.
-Blaine
Thursday January 17th, 2013
Dear Kurt,
I know that you know that the dance was tonight. I know I left a bubbly message about it. I'm writing this anyways because it just went so well Kurt. I don't know how Tina pulled off such a nice dance (seriously Kurt, I hope there are some good pictures of it because you would have loved the decor) with a minuscule budget, but she did.
I guess most of my message was me telling you about how Sam cracked the case to bring down the Warblers. I didn't really talk much about the dance itself. I had fun at it? I mean, at first I was nervous and there were bits that were not much fun for various reasons throughout the night, and leaving was nerve-racking. But I did it. Tina got me through it somehow and thank you for calming me down when I was freaking out earlier. I didn't want Tina (or Sam) to know how freaked out about it I really was.
Despite the fact that I didn't get to go with who I wanted, between performing, getting a solid case against the Warblers, and dancing, it was a lot of fun.
Next time we talk though I am demanding more information about NYADA. I didn't realize at the time because I've been so caught up in the dance, but you were oddly quiet about it. i know you don't owe me information about it or anything but I need confirmation that you're kicking butt before I send my "I told you so," letter in to admissions. Also, it kind of worries me that you barely said anything about it because that and your dad's health have practically been the only things on your mind since Christmas. So next phone call you are telling me because I begin to think you dropped out or something.
I love you!
Blaine
Thursday January 17th, 2013
The Sadie Hawkins dance was actually a lot of fun. A bit sad because, yeah, basically everyone there was with someone they were dating or could date, but besides that it was fun. The guys all performed No Scrubs which was a great way to start things off and then there was dancing. Which Sam interrupted because he had a break through on the Warblers cheating scandal. We talked to Finn and he said there was enough evidence to try and get them disqualified (Trent agreed to be a witness so that helped). We're going to be able to compete again. I'm really excited.
I feel a bit bad for Trent because he has to betray the Warblers but I'm also really proud of him for having the courage to do that. I don't know if I would. Whatever. We're going to be back.
-Blaine