Two weeks and a few days… that was how long he had been in the alternate universe. He put out his cigarette in the ash tray that was next to him, Kai staring out at the bleak world that lay before him. The sky was covered in grey, wintertime's solid cold causing a fog to emerge from the warm waters of the ocean. The streets were lined with people bustling about, the birds were flying through the clouds and yet the world seemed to stand still to him.

His breath cast upon the window made a little haze, and as he pressed his hand up against the window the cold formed the outline of his hand. He had counted the days, and even the weeks he had been in this universe, and still everything seemed to be missing.

The sudden pain in his chest caused him to drop to his knees, his hands clutching at his heart. He had had this pain for a few days now, Kai knowing that the pain had absolutely nothing to do with his physical being, with rather with his emotional state of mind.

He swallowed, trying to regain his composure when another pang of pain struck, sending him flying onto his back. He writhed back and forth, the pain only increasing and making him nearly cough up blood. The iron taste filled his mouth, but the wine refused to be free.

The only way to get out of here… is to correct the wrong I've done… but where is it? Where's this wrong that I'm missing?

He breathed out heavily, cupping his mouth in his hands, trying not to gag.

I've been to Kenny a few times these past few days… and he can't diagnose me with anything. It's nothing physical… it's purely mental.

He grit his teeth, eyeing his empty bed, his mind clicking.

He used to be there… everyday, waiting. Just waiting…

That faint illusion of the one he loved faded in and out of his memory. A soft look upon his love's face made his heart bleed, his eyes getting heavy. Kai felt his body strengthening, the pain in his chest fading into a dull throb. He knew he had to go see him, the one he missed the most.

I had never realized how much of my life you make up… I never realized… how much I would miss your hugs.

Looking down upon the ground in sorrow, Kai breathed in and swallowed, scratching his arm. A few pieces of paper lay on the floor, scattered around like leaves on a fall day. He gazed at them blankly until his legs forced him to move towards his desk and his chair.

When he sat, his eyes focused upon a dark spot on the ceiling. The darkness of his room made him feel rather cold, but in reality Kai knew that everything was meant to be cold to him. He did not deserve happiness, nor did he ever deserve to have him back.

But he had to try.

The only reason why he was stuck in this god forsaken world was because everything was his imagination. Everything was his wish, his own doing. To undo the wish, he had to come to terms with what he wanted the most.

But what he wanted…

His fingers opened his computer as his other hand searched for another cigarette to light up. Smoking had become part of his daily life now, since the other 'him' had the habit. Kai shook his head, knowing who wouldn't like this.

His eyes scanned up and down the lists of names in his search file, none matching that of whom he searched. The green screen flickered as he opened up another page, blowing out a ring of smoke and tapping his fingers on the dashboard. He had to find him.

He coughed a bit and spat into a nearby empty jar near the wall, tossing his now finished cigarette into the same jar. Smoke filled the air as he breathed out, his eyes scanning over the pages once again. He was still clad in his pajamas, but in a way that made him feel more comfortable and at home. He never felt warm in any clothes from this universe.

At that moment a knock at his door came, and Kai shouted to whomever that he was inside. The door opened slightly and Tala walked in calmly, eyeing Kai and his nakedness.

"Sir, why are you still-"

"Who cares; why are you here? More papers to file?"

Tala silenced for a second before shaking his head and dropping his usual notepad. Taking his glasses off his nose and rubbing them between his shirts, he addressed his boss.

Kai took a second to glance at Tala when he was talking and automatically stopped, feeling that something was off. Tala was dressed in regular street clothes, almost as if to say that he was not working.

"Why are you…"

"Sir, I'm off today, but I came to see you anyways." Tala folded his hands over his knees and sighed heavily. "Listen, Sir. I know what I said last night was a bit… uncalled for… but it was my honest opinion. You came here… lonely and scared… and then… are you going to leave like that?"

Kai's eyes traced along Tala's form, and then down to his computer screen, where a flickering mouse awaited his command.

"That's the last thing I want." He replied, switching the computer off. "I need to find him, Tala. I need to find the one person I haven't met yet."

"Who would that be Sir?"

Kai licked his lips and paused, thinking. "There are certain things that need to take place for me to go home… and I have a feeling meeting him would only advance the complication of me going home."

"I follow you so far."

Getting up and getting a marker from upon his desk he stood before the nearest wall and began to draw, his brain contemplating.

"If I'm here…" he pointed to a dot. "Then I should be there… but I can't go there because I'm here. Each encounter has led me to some conclusion of what my brain wanted, which then ignored the feelings deep within."

He drew a sketch of lines and crosses, circles and squares, numbers and figures, and eventually the blank wall became black with marker tracings.

"If I meet him… then the last thing I would want to do is meet him… because each time I meet someone… every time… I become more like him… I can feel it."

"Sir, I'm severely confused right now."

"But I don't want to be him, because 'he' isn't me. I am me, and no one else. And for me to be me again, and reclaim my own identity, I would have to go and meet him… and I don't even know where he is… he could be anywhere…"

At this point the fumes of the marker were beginning to get to Kai's head, and almost as if on cue Tala opened a window, letting some air in.

"Sir, if you really want to find whoever it is you're looking for, then why don't you just ask? I mean… you do know the name right? You seem to know the names of all the other people you met in your previous life."

Turning to Tala and dropping his marker Kai took out his lighter and flicked the flame on, grabbing another cigarette from his desk. He puffed out and inhaled, smoke blowing through his nose. He knew who he was, but he had to be sure of everything.

"Look up this name…"

Luckily he was rich. The crowd was a mess, all drunken teenagers and heavily clothed people who had so many piercings on their face that Kai couldn't tell what their face was and what was their ear. The only reason he even got tickets was because Tala had managed to snag two off of teenagers who exchanged them for a high price. Again, lucky he was rich.

He dug his way through the crowd, all screaming and hollering for the band to come out on stage. Kai glanced at his notepad as he took the thing out of his pocket and flipped through the pages. He was supposedly here, the leader of a band that was well known throughout the world. They went on tours and such, their latest gig happening right in the city where Kai resided.

Tala had been dragged along of course, and seeing as he was now his official sidekick in crime there was no way that Kai was going to leave him out of anything anymore. He was almost like a brother to Kai. Almost.

"Sir, are you sure he's here?" Tala screamed over the noise. Kai turned to him, eyeing a teenage girl with a short skirt on who passed by. He scowled in disgust.

"Yeah, he's gotta be here. Look at all the ass that's showing."

Kai had dressed nicely, of course, seeing as this was the first time he would see his love in this universe. He wanted to give this 'him' a good impression. Neon lights rained down upon the dark crowd, clouds covering the shimmering stars of the night sky. Fresh air was soon filled with moist scents of weed and drugs as the stage began to light up with vigor. The concert was about to start.

Kai could feel a tense hand upon his arm, and as he turned he felt the grip tighten.

"I hope you know what you're doing."

Kai breathed in and out softly, eyeing the man who was slowly walking onto the stage and making the crowd go wild.

"So do I."

The sounds of the heavy metal band screaming almost made his ears bleed, the crowd making him feel even worse than when he was at the club. Numerous times he was kicked in the face with heavy boots that seemed to weigh a million pounds. People around him wanted him to be dragged into the forming mosh pit, but time and time again he had been pulled out by Tala before he got in too far. Tala was always coming to his rescue.

The lights, the noise and the heat made him dizzy, Kai feeling as if he were about to faint at any second. The scent of weed made him nauseous and as the night dragged on he felt as if he was about to throw up his dinner.

With what little strength he had, Kai held out until the last song, finally having a chance to eye his VIP pass and get a little breath. The teenagers stared at him, calling him old man as they walked by, even when some of them looked older than he was. Kai breathed in and out calmly now, the scent of weed and the heat from the people leaving his body thankfully.

A strong hand on his shoulder led his head upwards and out of the cloudy mist that had become his field of vision.

"Sir, I think you want to head backstage."

The night was only beginning to settle in, and as he uprighted his body he could see the band hanging out near the edge of the stadium. A few of the band members were talking, and seeing as the stadium was outside, there was nowhere for them to really hide.

Kai felt a bit of nervousness overcome him, but he quickly shook his nerves off when he saw the band members leaving. He took a leap forward and began to run towards the members who made their way to their trailer through an alleyway.

"H-Hey!"

His legs bought him closer and closer to them, one band member stopping and staring at him.

"Oh you got one of those VIP things?" the guy asked, giving Kai the up and down look. A bottle of beer was plastered in his right hand and as he took a swig he spat on the ground, waving to someone off in the distance.

"Yo tiger, I think this one's for you!"

"Fuck you man, I took the last one."

"Aww, c'mon." the guy said, turning around to Kai again. "He's a little shy, give him some time." The man waved to his friend again and motioned his hand for him to come around. Kai stepped forward, speaking softly.

"If he doesn't…"

"Nah, nah man. You want to see the whole band right?" the guy asked, holding out a hand. "Name's Jeremy."

Kai took the sweaty hand, shaking it and then gazing behind Jeremy to the next man who was coming up to them. Jeremy turned around to the larger man and smiled, taking another swig of his beer.

"I'm sure he wants to meet the guitar song leader right? The guy who eats the mike alive while ripping it out on his instrument!"

"Knock it off pipsqueak." The larger man said playfully, rubbing Jeremy's head. Kai's heart began to beat faster in his chest, the pain going from a dull throb to a subtle sharp pain.

The pain… it's getting stronger… is it because…?

The moon appeared in the night sky, the clouds moving to reveal the man who stood before him at least six inches above him in height and a good hundred pounds heavier in muscle weight. Kai's eyes widened, his hands clamming up with nerves and his knees shaking.

"You…"

The man nodded his head, smirking a bit. "I know, everyone gets a little star struck around me. Just try to relax and take it in, we're all friends here."

His eyes were just as golden as Kai remembered them; his hair not even tied up but waved all around him in some sort of purple black aura. He stood so much taller than Kai did, and for some reason both confidence and strength resonated from his being.

"You're huge… you're so big…" Kai whispered, gazing up at the man. "You're so different…"

"In person?" the man asked, tilting his head to the side. His earrings jingled as he twitched his ears, leaning down to Kai and smiling.

"I'm the same guy you hear on the radio chats online. It's still the same me." he paused, gazing at Kai. "Now, what can I do for you?"

All those voices that Kai heard in his head suddenly came back to him, the memory of his love's baby face getting replaced by the sudden man who stood in front of him. Kai swallowed for what seemed like the thousandth time that day and spoke softly.

"Y-You… uhm…"

"Come on now, no reason to be shy." The man said, holding out a hand. "The name's Ray, also known as the Tiger of the band."

Go. Go to him.

His body lurched forward as if some invisible force yanked him from his position, his arms wrapping around the chest of the man who he loved the most.

"Hey!" almost instantly Kai was shoved off and pushed to the side, the man dusting himself off. "I appreciate the love but please, no contact."

"You don't even remember me…" he murmured, staring up at Ray's face which hardened.

"Oh I won't forget you after today." Ray replied, shaking his head. "I know fans tend to get a bit extreme, but you didn't have to-"

"You have no idea how long I've been searching for you… you're so different!" Kai exclaimed, letting his heart speak for once in his life. He didn't want to listen to Ray's words, he didn't want to go anywhere else, and he didn't even want to talk. All he wanted was to be with Ray in some secret place in a corner of the world where no one could find them.

Ray stared back at him awkwardly, backing away.

"You've been looking for me?"

"Ray… Ray I'm so glad I found you… it's been so weird… I own this company, I have an assistant, Tyson's… and Max is… oh there's just so much I have to tell you and I… I…" he paused, sighing. "I missed you a lot."

"Okay buddy, I think it's time for you to go. We're on tour and-"

"You don't understand," Kai shouted, grabbing a hold of Ray's arm. "If I don't right the wrong I did, I'll never get home!"

"Get off!" Ray yelled, pushing Kai back again. "You're freaking me out now! Get the hell out of here!"

The rest of the band members were whispering amongst themselves, and gazing at the two of them. Kai ignored them however, his heart set on the one thing he wanted the most.

"Ray I know you… you have to believe me! I know you!"

"You and half the world." Ray retorted, beginning to turn away. "Listen kid, if I have to get a restraining order against you I will."

"Kid? You were younger than me!" Kai shouted; his voice cracking. "You were at least a few months younger than me!"

Ray stepped forward now, glaring at Kai. "Look, I'm going to tell you again, get the hell out of here. You're freaking me and my band mates out, and that's the last thing you want to do."

"Please just listen to me Ray…" Kai begged, his body getting weak. "I know you, I know I do! Just not here, in this time, but another time!"

"Get the hell out of here before I have to make you get out!" Kai's body was shaking now, his head pounding as all the good memories of him and his love made him want to scream.

"Please Ray… you have to believe me." Kai stuttered, feeling the cold of rain upon his exposed skin. "I found you, I came to your concert, and I did all that because I missed you… Ray I'm so… so lost… and I don't even know what to do anymore…"

At this point Ray grabbed him by his collar, dangling him above the ground.

"I'm going to count to three and if you don't agree to get out of here I will pummel you to a pulp."

Kai could smell that familiar odor of mint on Ray's breath, bringing back even more memories. He placed his hands upon Ray's, speaking softly.

"You and I… we used to walk through the park together… we used to talk together…"

"One."

"You would always be so observant of the scenery…"

"Two."

Kai struggled in Ray's grip, but the strength within the man proved to be too much for Kai to handle. Kai writhed back and forth, the pain in his chest adding to the growing pains in his neck.

"You like getting scratched behind the ears!"

Kai closed his eyes and readied himself for an impact that never came. His nerves continued to pump adrenaline into his veins as he was put down upon the ground, Ray gazing down at him curiously.

"How… how did you…" Ray shook his head, chuckling. "No, that must've been out there somewhere… God knows what people put on the internet nowadays…"

Realizing his moment of opportunity, Kai began to flood out words the he had kept inside his heart all along. Everything had led up to this moment, and in this moment he would prove to himself how he truly felt. Kai knew that this was his last chance: the Gods were watching.

"You love home cooked foods, there's a weird little birthmark on the back of your shoulder, you use herbal shampoo, and you comb your hair out every morning and night before you go to bed…"

Ray stared at him incredulously now, Kai feeling pain well up in his chest. He breathed in and out, trying to calm himself.

"You have a great sense of humor… you love kittens… and you always said… that there will always be someone stronger than you… someone who will push you to your limit and beyond. That was you…"

The man's eyes were shaking now, his body moving back from Kai, who moved forward and wanting to embrace him.

"Ray… Ray please… I want to go home…"

"Who are you?" Ray asked, eyeing him. "There's no way you could have known all that stuff… there's just no way…"

Rain began to fall upon them both, drenching the men in cold wet. Kai could feel hot streams no running down his cheeks, his voice cracking more.

"Ray… remember me… please… you're the only one… I wanted to see…" falling to his knees and pounding on the ground, Kai began to shout now, his heart aflame and the pain wracking his body back and forth.

"I get it now! I get it! Are you fucking happy?" he cried, screaming. "This is my entire fault… everyone… it's all my fault! I'm to blame… fuck me… I'm the one who's unhappy… I'm the one with the biggest problem…"

His brain began to hurt now too, Kai holding his head as the rain poured down upon him. His body shook hard, his heart nearly bursting out of his chest.

"I'm sorry… I'm so sorry… for everything…"

Footsteps could be heard around him, Kai's ears beginning to lull every sound he heard together into a mush and mixture of rain and buzzing. Sorrow poured from his eyes and as he screamed again he felt all the energy he had stream out of him. The rain soaked him to the bone, Kai feeling the cold of the ground hit his face before feeling the blood run out of his mouth and nose. For some reason, he was bleeding.

From somewhere in the distance he heard his name being called, and as he lay shivering on the ground, he saw the familiar shoes of his assistant run towards him. Kai smiled, closing his eyes as he heard his name being called again.

Darkness filled his world.