Warnings: Major character death, sadness, slight (maybe?) ooc and language.

This has been sitting on my computer for a little while and I decided to finally post it, so I hope you like it. :P I still have the other requests and plan on working on them as motivation hits.

also, sorry for making it sad again. I just really wanted to continue this on a bit more.

Numb.

That was the only thing the ice mage could feel as he wordlessly stalked down one of Magnolia's less popular streets. Where exactly he was heading, he didn't quite know, nor could he say that he really cared.

A part of him attempted to convince himself to return back to his apartment, but he could no longer see that place as his home. He could do longer hold any endearment to the place that only served to remind the ice mage of him. Hell, everything he did only served to remind Gray of him. Going to the guild, going on a mission, interacting with his friends, every task that was once routine now proved to take a harsh toll on the raven. Instead he took to avoiding anything and everything that reminded him of the male that he tried so hard to forget.

A pale hand clenched as the other yanked his black hood further over his face before jamming both appendages back into his jean pockets, his pace hastening. Numerous thoughts and memories hammered his brain, thoughts and memories in which he just wanted to disappear.

It had been two weeks since he had died, however for the ice mage it felt like years. Ever since life seemed to be so much emptier; so barren.

Since that day he had only returned to the guild once, however he found it much too difficult to stay there. Everything about that place served to be a painful memory of him. Everyone was unusually quiet as well. There were no brawls, no heartful laughs, nothing.

Somehow, he found himself in front of a painfully familiar place, the place that he had been attempting to avoid at all costs for the past week. The graveyard where they had been forced to bury him.

Against his better judgment he pushed forward and passed by the line of graves, not even bothering to spare them a glance. He didn't want to see the names of all the people who's lives had ended.

Row by row he stalked silently, the feeling of unease in his gut worsening with every step. He haulted only once he arrived at a large stone grave with a fire pattern etched along the length of it. Only then did he look away from the cold ground.

His breath hitched in his throat as he read the all too familiar words that marred the otherwise spotless stone slab. The words burned into his memory and caused him to hold back a small sob.

'Natsu Dragneel,

The Salamander and fire dragon slayer of Fairy Tail.

A wonderful friend and wizard, son of the dragon Igneel. He will be dearly missed by all.

RIP.'

"Damn it, flamebrain." The ice mage muttered as his raven locks cascaded down his face and shaded his expression from any prying eyes, "Didn't I tell you not to die?"

Hesitantly, the black haired boy kneeled down on the grave and rested his forehead against the cold stone.

Cold... That didn't seem to fit Natsu at all... It wasn't right that the boy who showed so much warmth to everyone should have his memory feel cold. If anything it felt mocking; like the gods felt the need to be ironic. Nothing about the fire mage was ever cold, not his personality, not his body temperature, not even his magic.

"Now you went and made Lucy and Erza cry, you jackass." His voice was low and threatened to crack at any moment, "Happy is so lost without you. Nothing can make him smile anymore, not even fish. He's been so silent... Just like everyone else in the guild... Lucy... She never smiles anymore... Neither does Romeo... Hell, there's nothing cheerful about the damn guild anymore and it's all your fault you damn idiot! Why the hell did you have to go an die like that? Acting all heroic and shit! How could you do that to them? How could you do that to Happy? To Lucy? To Lissana, Erza and Wendy?!" He could just vaguely feel something warm drip down his otherwise icy face, however he paid it no heed, "How could you do that to me...? Damn you, Natsu. Damn you..."
He choked back a small, feeble sob as his hands rose to tightly grip the stone marker, not caring about the pain that it brought.

Fairy Tail just wasn't Fairy Tail without everyone there. It wasn't the happy, destructive guild without the usual drunk Cana sipping her beer, without Mira waiting the tables, without Macao and Wakaba idly chatting at their usual table, without Reedus happily painting in the corner, without Elfman yelling silly things about being a man, without Juvia gloating over everything Gray did, without Lucy and Levy talking happily, without Natsu and Gray getting into a fight and Gray stripping during the midst of it, without Erza ending the fight and scaring the two boys into a hug, nothing was the same now.

To the ice mage it felt like nothing would ever feel right again. With Natsu and his heat gone there was nothing to keep the creator magic maze from rebuilding his icy shield; nothing to keep him from secluding himself from the rest of the world. He would hide behind his ice magic like the useless coward he was.

"Why do you do this to yourself, ice princess?"

The raven glanced over at the pinkette, slightly irritated to be interrupted from his thoughts. He had distinctly sat in the back of the guild because he wanted to be alone, but leave it to the salamander to somehow miss or ignore that desire,

"I don't know what the hell you're talking about, ash for brains."

"Don't give me that shit, frosty, you and I both know that's not true."

The ice mage snickered and crossed his arms over his bare chest,

"What do you want, Natsu?"

The pink haired mage mimicked the other and crossed his arms as well, a slight frown marring his tan features,

"I want you to answer my question, Gray. Why do you do this to yourself? Why do you keep distancing yourself from everyone and always keep to yourself? It's pissing me off. What, is Fairy Tail not good enough for you or something?"

"You know that's not it, dammit." Blue eyes narrowed and met unwavering emerald ones, "Don't start talking about shit you don't know anything about, Jackass."

"Then why don't you tell me? I can't know unless you drop this stupid act and tell me."

Gray paused for a moment, his mouth opening before closing again. Natsu got him there.

"Why do you care so much anyway?"

Now it was the fire brain's turn to hesitate, a tan hand coming up to rub the back of his head as he seemed to think that question over for a moment,

"Erza and Lisanna are worried about you and all that, so they sent me over to talk to you... Erza can be pretty persuasive..."
It really was too bad for the Salamander that he was a horrible liar.

"Anyway, you're more down than usual... I mean, that's what the girls said, it's not like I noticed or anything..." He glanced away and sighed, his hand moving down to rub the back of his neck "Sheesh, uh, so... What's wrong...?"

The ice mage glanced down at the table and fingered his necklace gingerly, a mix of emotions swirling through his mind,

"Today... Well... Today's the day my parents died five years ago..."

The young Salamander cocked his head to the side slightly, now confused,

"Well, if they're dead, then what do you have to be sad about?"

"What kind of question is that, idiot? I miss them like you miss Igneel..."

"But Igneel's still alive... Besides, I might miss him an awful lot, but I'm not sad all the time."

The shirtless boy crossed his arms and looked away,

"Says the moron that spent the first year here frantically searching for him..."

The raven received a glare at his comment,

"Shut up, Popsicle. Least I'm not moping around, wasting my life mourning over people who are dead."

Natsu paused for a moment, aware of just how cruel that may have sounded.

"Look, they were your parents, right?"

The raven nodded hesitantly.

"Then I'm sure they wouldn't want you to be so sad all the time and act like an ass. They'd want you to continue living and all, that's why they protected you from whatever it was that happened. That's why I'm living like I am, Igneel would like it that way. I know I would too. When I die I don't want everyone to lose their smiles." He shrugged slightly, a warm blush creeping up his cheeks, "The dead is dead, sulking won't change anything, ice freak. Now, stop being a drama queen and fight me!"

A small smile crept onto the maker magic wizard's face at the memory all those years ago. At that time he was thirteen and Natsu was probably around twelve. It was the first time that anyone had been so insistent on learning what was wrong with him. Of course the other's had inquired about it several times prior, however they left it alone when the ice mage either ignored them or swore at them. Not even Erza or Cana nagged him to tell them why he was so down and why he was so reserved.

Tentatively, he wiped the tears away with his forearm before standing back up, his eyes lazily settling back on the grave before him. That day, Natsu had been right, much to Gray's annoyance. The dead were dead and there was no point in moping around or thinking about what could have been. You shouldn't waste the life they gave you by sacrificing their own.

Two and a half months ago Natsu Dragneel had saved Gray Fullbuster's life and two month's later that act managed to take his own away from him. The pinkette had given his life so that the raven could live, now here he was, wasting that life by wallowing in self pity. He could all but hear the fire breath's haughty tone downing on him for his sorrowful act,

"What, are you just gonna go and waste the life I gave you mourning over me, snow queen?" He imagined the slayer jeer, his ever present grin gracing his face, "I always knew you were weaker than me, Popsicle, but not to this extent. Come on, this isn't the arrogant pain in the ass guy I called my rival. Get fired up! Continue on and stop looking back so damn much!"

"What am I doing? I bet you're mocking me from the grave, aren't you, ya little shit?" He smiled slightly, the pain in his chest lessening slightly, "Man, I'm pitiful, aren't I, flamebrain?"

Absentmindedly, the ice wizard fingered the scarf he had wrapped around his pants like a belt as he waited for a returning insult that he knew would never come. The scaly fabric was soft to the touch and was warm, an ironic contrast to the dark blue haired male's own skin and the temperature outside. Not once had he stripped off his pants since he started using the fabric for he couldn't bring himself, even subconsciously, to remove it.

"Don't worry, Natsu, I'll make sure the guild goes back to being how it was and I promise to continue on with my life. Lyon even came over to help me, go figure, huh?"

He gingerly set his hand on the grave, lightly carassing the cold granite,

"But I can't promise that I'll forget you. It's gonna be really hard not to see your annoying face everyday and to go on missions without you destroying everything in your path." He smiled slightly, allowing the last few tears to fall from his eyes before freezing and falling down onto the grave, "Happy came to live with me too, you know. He still annoys Lucy by coming over to her house, though, but I promise to take good care of him. "

There were more things the ice mage wished to say, to tell the boy that he began to love, but he couldn't find the courage to say it, even now when he knew no one was listening. He wanted to tell him how much his absense truly killed him on the inside and how much he loved him. Now it was too late to ever let him know.

Silence settled over the graveyard and he smiled softly as he recalled his times with the slayer, all their missions, all their quarrels, all their battles, everything. His mood improved at all the funny memories, but also worsened at the realization that that was it. There would never be any new memories with his rival, no more fighting over childish thing, no more missions where the pinkette destroyed half the town and no more battles test their strength. Never again would he dance on a table in the guild or start a brawl and soon, everything that he could remember so clearly now would deteriorate until they were just vague recollections in the back of his mind, just like all the memories of his time with his parents.

To be honest that terrified the ice mage. He didn't want to be unable to remember his best friend and would be lover. He didn't want to forget the boy that helped him put his parent's deaths behind him. He didn't want to forget.

'It's not the memories that hurt," He mused inwardly to himself, 'It's the flashbacks that follow."

How long he stayed out there, gently caressing the stone and scarf, he didn't know nor did he precisely care. Instead he just enjoyed the trranquility, reliving his favorite memories and playing absentmindedly with his ice; attempting to get his sculpture just right before he left.

Soon, as the darkness came, the raven left, bidding his friend one last farewell before returning to his apartment where his other friend was waiting. He knew moving on was going to be hard and painful, but he knew Natsu would have wanted nothing less from him. He would continue living and become a wizard that even the fire dragon slayer would have admired. Then, and only then, he would pick up Natsu's quest in finding Igneel. He'd tell the dragon about the pinkette and, putting his pride aside, he would tell the boy's surrogate father just how great a man his son grew up to be.

Meanwhile, a small, glass looking object could just barely be seen shining in the fleeting afternoon sun. There, leaning precariously against the granite grave of Natsu Dragneel, was a small heart made of ice and frozen against the stone, unmoveable. Etched on the heart was a small Fairy Tail symbol and the words, written in tiny letters, were

'Rest in peace, flamebrain. I love you.'