Tank bent over trying to catch his ragged breath. The big man shook his head vigorously as he attempted to shake the black spots blurring his vision. His back hurt and he thought that he twisted something in his leg. He just needed a moment.
A squat purple gopher man in front of him was babbling something about '..change back.." but Tank ignored him. The screaming pain in his arms and chest were the only thing concerning him.
Tank wasn't even sure if all the snakemen were dead yet, but he assumed they were. In fact, he still wasn't sure if they were even snakemen to begin with. They were bigger than the regular yuan ti, and had a more bestial and multi colored look to them. After he rammed one of the critters with his shield he saw the sandwich woman pivot and spin with a blade behind it. He didn't know any sandwich shaped women, but judging by its movements he assumed it was Fyris. Off to the side a giant black skinned woman was smashing a snake into the ground, while a constantly shifting gopher man was shooting a butter churner madly. He wanted to help out a bit more, but he just needed to make sense of it all… catch his breath….rest his back…..stretch his legs…..
"Hey buddy, are you going to change…or are you really a clown?" repeated the gopher man.
Tank struggled to focus his vision and saw the gopher fade and reform. He was being addressed by a dwarf. The stout man was dressed in a guard's uniform and had a stupid look on his bloodied and bearded face.
Tank frowned. With his vision a bit more grounded in reality he gave a quick scan for more snakemen but saw only his troupe's ripped tent, and the bodies of the dead and dying. He expected the dwarf before him to be freaking out right now, but the guard seemed more curious with his thespian credentials. He was either experienced in these sort of things or an idiot.
"I'm not a clown," said Tank with a hint of annoyance in his voice. "I'm a …ventriloquist."
The dwarf's beady eyes grew wide. "Really? You can read minds?"
Tank bristled at the dwarf. He was about to yell at him or perhaps slam his shield atop his head, but was interrupted by a deep voice.
"Isah is safe. I don't think those creatures were after them," said the towering dark skinned woman to the dwarf.
Tank was considered fairly tall, even amongst the naturally tall northerners of his own village, but even he had to crane himself up to get a full view of the woman. She was jet black with glowing eyes and stood over ten feet tall. She had bare muscular arms and legs and wore nothing save some brass jewelry and a simple tabard. He expected her form to waver and change like everyone else's but her form did not shift. He wasn't sure if she was friend or foe but she had scales and snake blood on her fists, so he was willing to give her the benefit of the doubt.
The dwarf waved her off. "One sec Adria, I'm waiting for this clown to change so I can determine if he's a snake or not. Or at least I'm gonna see if he can read my thoughts."
"I'm not a clown. I'm a ventriloquist ! I make inanimate objects talk, " repeated Tank indignantly. " I just look like a clown, because of the white make up. It makes me stand out more , especially for an evening's performance."
"The fat man is not a snake,"said a small voice. Tank looked around, and saw a slip of a girl hanging tightly on the giantess' neck.
The dwarf paused for a second. Tank waited for a reply but the dwarf seemed to be a bit dense. After a while he finally shrugged, sighed in disappointment and then turned to the giantess. "I take it there's no more snakes….wait…why didn't you change form when everything was going crazy. While we're at it, why didn't these snakes either. Their corpses look just as scaly now as when everything was going nuts."
"The warp wave mainly affects mortals and the prime worlders like yourself," replied the woman that the dwarf referred to as Adria. "The chaos aura these Proteans, snakemen if you like, generates are mainly ineffectual against outsiders like your tall friend there."
"Is that true?" asked Tank to the box at his side. He waited for answer but none came. The small girl, the giantess, and the dwarf looked at tank expectantly but nothing happened. The box was normally chatty but instead it remained silent.
"Yup….." said Tank finally from the corner of his mouth.
The dwarf looked at the box in wonder and then gave Tank an impressed nod. "Great Moradin's beard…You really can make things talk. You're one of those voice throwers that you see at the markets right? "
"Ventriloquist, " sighed Tank at his own subpar performance. "Look….what just happened here? I was expecting a brawl with the local vizier and his thugs, but it looked like these snakemen got the jump on everyone."
The dwarf brushed away some debris out of his beard and prodded one of the slain creatures. Though they were dead they were slowly fading away at the touch of his boot. Tank didn't have much experience with these creatures, but he did recognize the particular way that outsiders slowly vanished from this reality. He expected some sort of answer but besides some glances at the box, the dwarf paid him no heed.
"So these snakeguys…." Began the dwarf.
"Protean," corrected the giantess.
"err….proteins….whatever…weren't after Isah? What were they after?" asked the dwarf.
The giantess scanned the room and seemed to think thoughtfully. "The local guards sacrificed their lives, but at least they broke up their formation. I could discern no pattern to the snakes but they were definitely not after Isah. When you were afflicted with the warp wave, little Isah was on her own till I was summoned to do battle with them. The Proteans had ample opportunity to abduct or slay her till I materialized," explained the giantess.
Tank looked at the small innocent looking girl and paused at the chilling thought. He ignored the fact that there was apparently a summoned giant in his tent." Are you two her guardians or something? Is this little girl in trouble or something? "
The dwarf gave Tank an annoyed look as if he was a common busker or something. "Look buddy, this girl is way more trouble than she appears. First her entire town apparently vanishes, then she sends us scrambling through kobold tunnels, afterwards we fight demons in that armpit of a city Jaboor, and now we're fending off proteins that I've never even heard of in who knows gawds where we are. Coincidence? I have no clue, but all I know is crap seems to follow her around ever since she started yapping some demon lord's name," complained the dwarf. Isha shrunk at the criticism and hid from the dwarf's view by crawling to the other side of Adria. "I didn't mean it that way lassie. I'm just frustrated that's all. I mean what's the big deal, I say demon names all the time and nothing bad ever happens."
Tank was intrigued. He was about to press the dwarf for more information when the box at his side finally interrupted.
"Oh…what pray tell demons lords do you know?" asked the box.
The dwarf smiled broadly at the challenge. "Oh let me see….there's the flying super buzzard, the evil rusting rock, the two headed super baboon thingy…"
"Two headed super baboon thing?" chuckled the box. "Oh please watch your tongue. I do not wish to be smote by the forces of the Abyss," it teased in a sarcastic voice.
"Tenborus…." Whispered the girl. While she was quiet as a sand mouse, there was something imperceptibly powerful about her voice. There was a time when Tank wouldn't have noticed it, but his years of dealing with the supernatural gave him a certain acumen that caused him to grip his shield and raise his blade in a defensive manner.
The area immediately around them fell quiet, and only the sounds of the dying could be heard in the distance. Tank was waiting for demons or more snakemen but none came. He wasn't sure why, but for a moment he was spooked.
"…girl….do not repeat that word again….." he warned.
"Pfft….yeah that's what that slooty sage said before she sent us on this quest to find some old geezer adventurers," shrugged the dwarf. Tank noticed the dwarf had quickly dismissed the incident but for a second the short guard seemed to be terrified as well. "I believe in cause and effect, but clearly the snakes attacked us before she said that word."
"True…..in most cases, but not for creatures of pure chaos," agreed the box.
Tank hated it when the box spoke cryptically. For one thing he disliked being the only person in a room that had no clue , also he thought the box liked making him look stupid. Their usual routine was to do the ventriloquism act bit for the crowds, but the box seemed to enjoy the chatter right now a bit too much. Tank quickly solved the problem by dropping it heavily on the ground.
"..Oww!" yelped the box as it opened and an old withered skull rolled out.
The dwarf stopped. He stared at the skull and then at Tank and then back at the box again. " Damn…you are a good voice thrower. It actually sounded like it came from the skull," he said as he poked it with his boot.
Tank ignored him as he appraised the three. The girl was still an unknown but the dwarf and the giant were good fighters. Good enough fighters to beat these snakemen and more importantly kept their cool about it. A normal guardsman would be crying over their dead comrades or be in shock, but these two took the violence in stride. Despite their apparent skill and experience, the big warrior ignored them since nothing they said had made any sense. Instead he looked around the room and saw Fyris. She seemed uninjured, and was currently talking to a man dressed in similar attire to the dwarf. Tank would have paid it no mind, except the chubby woman seemed to be laughing at the man as he bowed graciously to her. Tank remembered that airy laugh. He remembered all the times that Fyris use to laugh at his jokes and jest. It seemed so recent, yet also so long ago.
"…Oh hey, mister…do you know where we could find these adventurers. They're supposed to be the ones that sacked that underground pyramid outside Lower Lueders a few years ago," asked the dwarf.
Tank raised an eyebrow. "Why would you be seeking these so called adventurers out? "
The dwarf shrugged. " Orders from the Sultan of Jaboor. He wants to make it look to the common man that he cares about his subjects. I told you that Isah is a lodestone for trouble, and he rather we solve her problem outside Jaboor's walls instead of inside them. So we've trekked halfway through Ylaruam to find the adventurers that sacked the pyramid of Dow Mow. Apparently it has something to do with the demon name Isah was yapping about. It's probably a wild Achaierai chase, but these adventurer guys might have recovered a tome or something that might shed some light on that matter."
Tank chuckled slowly and shook his head. "I'm sorry you guys travelled so far, but it appears it's for nothing. Believe it or not, I'm one of the adventurers you speak of, and I'm afraid we didn't recover any books or copied any wall scrawlings or anything. "
"It was pretty much a standard smash and dash operation," chattered the skull.
The dwarf stared at Tank in disbelief. "Wait…you're one of those great adventurers that we've been looking for? Why the hell are you dressed like a gawd damn clown?"
"I'm retired! " scowled Tank defensively.
"Aren't powerful adventurers supposed to marry princesses and live the easy life in some kingdom after they hang up the swords. Or maybe retire in some might flying fortress or interdimensional strong hold? At the very least, go old school cliché and run a rowdy inn where younger adventurers can find quests or engage in a bar fight? ..you…you run a clown operation! Now, I know your voice throwing is quite impressive, but a circus? " said the dwarf in such disappointment that it made even Tank's heart sink a little.
"Look, you don't have to tell me this ok. I wanted my own castle, or at least my own bar, but….but my companion….Fyris wanted to follow her dreams to be a singer. So I kinda followed along and invested in this troupe of thespians….." explained Tank with a defeated voice. He left out the part that he would have followed that girl to the ends of the world, but instead of living out their dream, her goal to become a singer had slowly soured their relationship.
The dwarf turned away. Tank wondered if it was in disappointment or disgust. He then turned to the other guard talking to Fyris from across the tent and waved him over.
The tall guard said something to Fyris which drew some more laughter, before he escorted her towards the rest of the group.
"It's a dead end I'm afraid. Apparently these are the adventurers we are looking for, but they don't have the books we seek," said the dwarf. "Like so many other things we do, it's been a big waste of time and effort. I don't even think these proteins were after Isah."
The other guard smirked at his dwarven partner. "It's Proteans and aye, I've gathered as much as well. I've spoken with the lovely lady Fyris here….."
Tank did not like the way this guy was yapping or the way he exchanged looks with Fyris. He acted way too familiar with her for his liking. He wanted to punch the guard's well groomed face in, and would have done so but he was too tired from the previous effort.
"…and she has confirmed most of what you say. The 'Proteans' were a surprise to me, but I think you've missed the main issue Kirgi," continued the other guard as he nodded to the giantess. The giantess returned the nod, and handed the small girl to the dwarf before vanishing into the night.
"Eh?" asked the dwarf as he sat Isah down. "Weren't we looking for books and scrolls Petrus? These guys don't have any of it, they're just washed up and fat adventurers."
Tank bristled at the comment. Once upon a time he would have grabbed the dwarf by the beard and hammer throw him out of the tent, but he was still sorely out of breath. Could it be that he was right? Was he just another washed up adventurer.
The tall guard ignored Tank's fuming and focused on the dwarf. "True, but that was just a means to an end. The scrolls would have been invaluable but they have something better."
Tank raised his eyebrow. "Really we do?"
Fyris nodded and pointed at the box."Yes, Tank we do."
"Eh? Your little gimmick for your act?" asked the dwarf with a puzzled look. "Is it full of artifacts or is it some type of ancient puzzle box?"
Tank shot Fyris a cold look. The box wasn't just their secret, it was their charge. They were sworn to keep it safe. How could she let these guards in on this trust? "She's just babbling…it's just a box for my act," he said as he picked it up and shook it vigorously.
The box played along and remained silent.
"See, it does nothing," said Tank.
The tall guard did not seem convinced and said a few arcane words and stared at the box. He then looked at Fyris and shook his head. "I detect no magic….are you sure this is what we seek?"
"See….nadda…it's a dud. You came all this way for nothing," said Tank. "Back to, what did you say earlier? Oh yea…back to whacking kobolds for you guys I'm afraid."
The small girl however was not convinced and pointed at the box. "Pharoh," she whispered.
Tank paused at the comment, but remained calm. "Sorry missy, it's just a box," he apologized.
"Normally I would remain silent and play along with Tank's well intentioned ruse, but things are different now. I am the one you seek," interrupted the box. "I am the eternal god...I am the last of the Mow Dynasty. I am the Pharaoh Dow Mow."