Notes:

Here is the next chapter. With almost exactly 5,000 words it's the longest chapter so far and twice as long as some of the earlier chapters. So hopefully that makes up for the longer than usual wait.

I finally dared to introduce Varys to this story. It was either now or never. And I think it might not be the last time he will show up in this story.

Let me know what you think.

On the ship to White Harbor

"Did you tell the crew to put my trunk in your cabin?" Jorah asked.

"Yes," Daenerys replied.

Jorah looked at her like he wanted to say something.

"Is something wrong? Was I too presumptuous?"

"No, but…"

"Didn't we agree I wouldn't be sleeping alone?"

"It's just…"

"That we should keep separate quarters for appearances' sake?"

"Yes."

"Everybody on this ship is aware of our relationship and it would be a waste of space. There are not many cabins to start with. Or do you rather want to share with Tyrion?"

Jorah grinned at her. "Of course not." He had grown to really like Tyrion. But Tyrion just wouldn't stop talking.

"It can still be arranged," she said, trying to put on a serious expression. "You don't have to agree just to please me."

"I have spent enough time in close proximity to Tyrion Lannister to last me a life time." Jorah took her hand and pulled her closer.

Daenerys went willingly and leaned against him. They were about to set sail and she was glad that they would have a few days to get some rest and to collect their thoughts. No fighting, no ravens, no bad news.

"You should get some sleep, Khaleesi," Jorah said.

She took a step back and frowned at him. "I wish you would use my name when we are alone. Why won't you?"

"Forgive me. I didn't mean anything by it. It will take some time to get used to it."

"I guess I have no reason to complain as it's my own fault."

"Hush." He tilted her head towards him. "I love saying your name, Daenerys. I am just a bit out of practice."

Content with his answer, she smiled. "I was just about to lie down." Carefully, she took his bandaged hand in hers. "You should rest too."

"I'm fine. I got enough sleep last night." The truth was that his wounds did hurt. The herbs were starting to lose their effectiveness. Jorah knew he wouldn't be able to sleep, only when he was dead tired or Sam changed his bandages and applied new herbs to numb the pain. He wouldn't mind lying down, but he wanted her to get some undisturbed rest.

Jorah was looking out over the sea. Daenerys was still below deck and sleeping. He was concerned how emotional she had been this morning. Her lack of sleep had probably played a part in it. But he was wondering if Tyrion had been right. Was their being together a good idea? He was glad he had been with her when the assassin had tried to kill her. But she worried too much about him. She should be focused on her goal and nothing else. He wanted to help her, not distract her.

"Tyrion was right," Jon said, interrupting Jorah's train of thought. "You do glower a lot."

"You must be looking forward to going home," Jorah said.

"I am," Jon said. "Although it feels strange now. It is still my home, but different. What about you? Will you go to Bear Island?"

"No. There won't be time." And he didn't know if he was welcome there. Besides, he wouldn't leave Daenerys. "I am curious. My cousin Lyanna swore allegiance to House Stark. How is she?"

Jon smiled. "I have never seen someone as young, determined, courageous and level-headed as her. She's quite remarkable."

"Did you know she was named for Ned Stark's sister?"

"I assumed as much." Jon was silent for a while, lost in his own thoughts. Then he said, "Neither my sister nor your cousin were in favor of me coming to Dragonstone."

"Any particular reason?"

"Several. And a natural dosage of caution."

"Trust doesn't come easily anymore."

"Nobody in the North wants the Lannisters on the Iron Throne after what they did. But being the daughter of the Mad King isn't helpful."

"She is not like her father."

"They don't know that. They don't know her at all. But the Iron Throne is a problem for later. If we don't stop the Night King nobody will have to worry about who sits on the Iron Throne." Jon was glad that they were leaving the Iron Throne far behind them the further north they sailed. Politics wasn't his. He didn't like the lying and the scheming. Fighting was all he knew. "I will help her reclaim the Iron Throne. One reason being that I am not cut out for it and I honestly want nothing to do with it. But I won't rejoice at helping her. People on the Iron Throne don't live long and happy lives."

Jorah and Jon were standing there for a long time, looking out over the sea towards Westeros.

"My two most trusted Lords."

"Khaleesi," Jorah said and slightly bowed his head. She looked rested and smiled at him with clear eyes.

Daenerys moved to stand between them. "What are we looking at?"

"We've just passed Claw Isle," Jon said and pointed it out to her. "If the weather stays like this we should reach White Harbor in good time."

Daenerys moved slightly towards Jorah, seeking the protection of his body against the wind.

"Are you cold, Khaleesi?"

"No, I'm fine."

Nevertheless Jorah moved his body sideways, so that she would be better protected from the wind. She had fully recovered from her fever. But she wasn't used to this climate and it was windy and damp on the ship.

Drogon and Rhaegal were following the ship, flying close to the coastline.

"They look like they are enjoying themselves," Jorah remarked. He felt Daenerys lean against him.

"They like when we are on the move," she said. "But I doubt they will like the colder temperatures up north." The wind chill was freezing, but her clothes protected her rather well. She was seeking Jorah's closeness. She was indulging. They were far from Dragonstone, Winterfell or any other formal setting.

"If you'll excuse me, I'll go below deck and keep Sam some company," Jon said and left them. He could feel they wanted to be alone. They seldom had the opportunity to be so casual with each other. Daenerys seemed totally at ease, Jorah not quite as much. He took his cues from her.

Jorah moved so that he stood behind her and wrapped his cloak around her, essentially hiding her from view.

"I like the sea," Daenerys said. "It's so quiet."

"Quiet?" Jorah asked amused. The wind was howling, the waves were crashing against the hull, the ship was creaking and the crew was shouting instructions at each other.

"I guess quiet is the wrong word. Everything seems so far away, so small, so insignificant."

"I know what you mean."

They stood like that for a long time, looking out over the water, slowly watching Westeros go by.

Daenerys wished, mostly for his sake, that they would pass Bear Island. But she was aware that his beloved island lay on the other side of Westeros and they would not get to see it. She had looked up Bear Island on a map a long time ago, wanting to know where he came from. "Tell me about your home," Daenerys said. "Tell me about Bear Island."

Jorah looked at her surprised, but then he started telling her. He was astonished how easily the memories from so long ago came back to him. "I still remember the smell of freshly felled trees, the resin, the pine. The sound the falling trees made when they crashed to the ground. The sound of the crackling fire. When I close my eyes I can see every hallway, every room. I remember my father sitting in his chair, listening to his people's problems. I remember the smell of food when a great feast was being prepared. The preparations started days before the feast itself. Those were good times. I remember the sword practice. I was always looking forward to it. As the only son, the only child of my father, I was expected to do better than everybody else."

Daenerys gently squeezed his hand.

"It wasn't a burden. I saw it as a challenge. My father encouraged me, telling me I could always do better. It was easy for me anyway. The fighting was always easy. The other duties expected of me, not so much. I am a good soldier, a good fighter. But I was never meant to be Head of my House. Lyanna was born to be. From what Jon told me she is a true leader, a natural. Never doubting herself. Just like you. She is worthy of calling herself the Lady of Bear Island. She is the impersonation of Bear Island. Brave, fierce, proud, fearless, unwavering."

Daenerys could hear it in his voice, feel it in his posture, how proud he was of Lyanna and how much Bear Island meant to him even though he hadn't set a foot on it in so many years. And suddenly she knew it. The feeling he invoked in her. The feeling she'd had when Jorah had first held her in his arms at night. The feeling she had every time he was close to her. She turned around in his arms. She had to raise her head slightly to look into his eyes. "You are my home."

"What?" Jorah looked at her, not sure he had heard her correctly.

"I feel at home with you. No matter where we are. We've traveled so far together. I made it back to Dragonstone, but I have no memories of the place. I felt relieved and triumphant when I finally felt the sand of Dragonstone under my feet. But it was not the same as coming home. I reached a goal, a milestone. It was victory. But it didn't feel like home. It was even bigger and more impressive than in my imagination. But the halls were empty. There were no memories at all. It never was my home to begin with. It was just a dream. But when you came back to me that felt like I found myself again, like a missing part of myself had returned. It's hard to explain. But it's like you describe Bear Island. It's memories, feelings, smells. When you came back I was assaulted by all those. You are my home."

"As you are mine," Jorah barely managed to utter. He was about to lean down to kiss her, but caught himself at the last moment. They were after all on deck and anybody could see them.

Daenerys smiled at him and stroked his cheek. "Later," she mouthed. And then she turned around again, watching Westeros go by.

Varys eyed them suspiciously.

"You look like something is bothering you," Tyrion said.

"The Queen and Jorah Mormont, how the hell did that happen?" Varys asked.

"Very gradually, I would say."

"This isn't just about some fun in the bedroom, is it?" She wouldn't have picked Jorah for that.

Tyrion pretended to think about his answer for a moment before he said, "No, I don't think so." Tyrion knew so.

"Why did I only find out about it last night?" After the attack on the Queen all of Dragonstone knew that Jorah had been with her. Admittedly, it had most likely saved her life.

Tyrion grinned and shrugged his shoulders. Varys wasn't as much behind as he thought he was. But there was no need for him to know that. Besides, the signs had been there. They had all just been too focused on other things.

"What happened at the meeting the day before yesterday?" Varys asked.

"Nothing of importance."

Varys looked at Tyrion, obviously not convinced at all. "Why am I being kept out of the loop?"

"It's nothing personal."

"How can I do my job if I am excluded from council meetings?"

"If I told you, I would betray her trust in me. So stop asking."

"I will find out eventually."

Tyrion knew Varys was the best when it came to information and secrets. Maybe he should keep his own drinking to a minimum for the time being, just in case. "Well, if you do. Keep it to yourself."

Convinced that Tyrion wouldn't give anything away, Varys returned to their earlier topic. "He is a liability. He will bring her down."

"Since when are you so melodramatic? Yes, politically speaking he isn't the wisest choice. But without him, she would have been killed last night. And it wasn't the first time he saved her life. It probably won't be the last. At least she is safe with him."

"From bodily harm at least."

"If she dies, this whole undertaking is over."

"He is making her weak," Varys insisted.

"He is doing the opposite. You wanted her to be more compassionate."

"I said she needed to listen to her counselors, not to someone who whispers in her ear when nobody else is around."

"Whispering is your job. And I admit that you are the best. But maybe you've done it for far too long and now you see deceit wherever you look."

"What would you have me do? Trust people?" Varys asked with contempt in his voice.

"Maybe once in a while," Tyrion suggested, although he didn't believe for one second that Varys would follow this particular advice. "She makes her own decision, always has. We need to support her, give her options and help her retain her compassion so that she will make the right decisions."

"Compassion? That's your solution?" Varys asked incredulously.

"Yes," Tyrion said with confidence. "What was the Mad King missing? What was Joffrey missing? What is Cersei missing?"

"Compassion," Varys conceded.

"And she has that compassion. But how is she supposed to hold on to it surrounded by bloodshed, conspiracies and betrayal?"

"Betrayal? Now that's an interesting word you chose there," Varys said. "He betrayed her once. What makes you think he won't do it again?"

"Do I have to remind you that you relayed the information to Robert? You are just as guilty in this case. Besides, he would rather die than betray her again."

"That is a very bold statement. When faced with death, most men chose to live and pay whatever price necessary."

"Not him," Tyrion said with conviction. "Not where she is concerned."

"You really are a romantic at heart, aren't you?" Varys said with pity and a hint of disgust.

"One of my greatest faults," Tyrion admitted.

"That little whore made you weak."

Tyrion gave him a look that clearly showed he didn't approve of Varys using that term, even if every single word was true.

After dinner, Jorah was getting ready for bed. It was still early but he was worn-out and tired. In the morning he had been quite rested. But now, at the end of the day, his arm and hand were aching.

Daenerys had observed how Jorah had gotten more and more weary and sore as the day had progressed. He must have been in pain all day but now he wasn't able to mask it anymore. At least he didn't show any signs of a fever. "Sam said he'll come by and change the bandages and apply fresh herbs," she said. He didn't even give the slightest sign of acknowledge that he had heard her.

Jorah tried to unfasten his belt but his hand started to shake from the pain. "Damn it!"

Daenerys walked over to him. He let her help with the belt, but when she tried to help him with his tunic he turned away from her.

"Don't."

"Are you angry at me?"

"Angry? No. Why?"

"For not letting you ride with the Dothraki?" Had she hurt his pride? But there was no way she would have let him ride like that. She would have only worried constantly. She was glad that the others had backed her up. Her last option would have been to threaten to ride with him, leading the Dothraki herself. She knew Jorah would have relented then.

He looked at her apologetically. "I am not angry at you. I am angry at myself."

"You saved my life," she reminded him with a hint of frustration.

"It shouldn't have come that far in the first place."

Daenerys realized that she wouldn't be able to convince him that it hadn't been his fault. She tried again to help him undress, but he wouldn't let her.

"I don't want you to do that. You are my Queen."

She sighed. Exasperation was written all over her face. "I understand that you are not used to anyone helping you. You took care of me while I was sick. I hate to see you in pain. Please let me help you." Daenerys had to make a conscious effort not to order him. She really wanted to order him to get it over and done with. But she also wanted to show him that she was not just his Queen anymore. "You saved my life. Let me at least spare you some of the pain." Daenerys reached out to stroke his face. "Besides, I like to be close to you, to touch you." She knew he couldn't resist her touch. They both knew.

Even though he had lain skin to skin with her, the light touch of her fingers against his cheek was all he could feel at that moment, making him forget about the pain throbbing in his arm and hand.

She moved her hand lower to caress his neck. "No one can survive in this world without help. You told me that."

Jorah looked at her surprised.

She gave him a playful smile. "I do listen to your counsel." Her fingers played with the hair at the back of his neck. "But can you follow your own advice?" Eventually she felt him relax. "Sit down. I am not tall enough."

Jorah finally relented. He sat down on a chair and let her help him undress. When Daenerys had gotten down to his shirt, there was a knock at the door.

"Your Grace, it's Samwell Tarly."

"Come in."

Sam was holding a bowl containing the mixture of herbs.

"I'll leave him in your care," Daenerys said to Sam. Then she turned to Jorah again. "I'll go and find Jon. Try to get some rest." She caressed his cheek one last time before she left them. She hoped the herbs would take effect quickly and he would be able to sleep.

Jon and Daenerys were sitting in the mess hall. Everything was quiet by now. Nobody else was around. There was one candle lit between them and two cups filled with wine. They had been talking for quite a while, Jon asking her questions about her family.

"I wish I could tell you more about Rhaegar, but I only know what other people have told me. If Ser Barristan was still with us he could have told you all about him," Daenerys said with sorrow in her voice. "I wish I had spent more time with him while he was in my service."

"In this world people you care about die too quickly and without warning," Jon said. "You bid them farewell thinking you will see them again soon, not knowing it will be the last time you ever see them. When Ned Stark and I parted ways – me going to the Wall, him going to King's Landing – he told me the next time we would see each other he would tell me about my mother."

"But it never came to that."

"No," Jon said bitterly. "Maybe he didn't even intend to tell me truth. Maybe he just wanted to tell me some story so I would stop wondering. I'll never know now." He took another swallow of his wine. "It's funny. I had just gotten used to being a bastard. Or maybe I just stopped caring. Or people stopped caring that I was a bastard. And now?" He looked around, making sure nobody else was there, and said quietly. "I am not a bastard after all."

Daenerys just watched him and listened.

"It feels good not to be one. But to find out my whole life was a lie… And I still don't really know who my parents were. I don't care if they were legally married. To know they loved each other and wanted me is the greatest gift. But I wish I had known them. Even if I had only known Lyanna as my aunt, to have memories of her…"

Daenerys reached out and squeezed his hand. "You made a life for yourself. You didn't let yourself be constrained by what you thought your heritage was." Daenerys knew about constrains. Her brother Viserys had been hers.

"I did. For a long time I did. Only after I left Winterfell I felt free to leave all that behind as well. The Night Watch certainly wasn't what I had expected. It was quite disappointing at first. But after a while it became so much more than I had expected."

"Is that when you met her?"

Jon took a deep breath and sighed. "Not immediately."

"Tell me about her," Daenerys said.

Jon was quiet for a long time

Daenerys understood. She had not wanted to talk about Jorah when he'd been gone. It had been too painful. "I'm sorry. You don't have to talk about her. I understand."

"Her name was Ygritte."

Again, Jon was quiet for a long time and Daenerys thought that would be all he would reveal to her, but then he did go on.

"She was a Wilding, a free woman. Freedom was worth more to her than anything else."

"I think I would have liked her."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that. She wouldn't have kneeled to anyone. The Free Folk don't kneel to anyone, they would rather die. They don't even kneel before their own king."

"You admire them," Daenerys realized.

"I lived with them, pretended to be one of them. And then I betrayed the woman I loved for something I believed was greater than her or me. And we both paid dearly for it. I am not saying she would have lived if I had made a different choice. Most likely it wouldn't have changed the outcome. I will never know." Suddenly Jon laughed.

"What's so funny?"

"She used to say something to me: You know nothing, Jon Snow. It seems she was right. She was always right. How I wish she was here now. She'd taunt me, provoke me, insult me. And it would make me feel better. And if her words wouldn't be enough, she'd probably hit me. Or shoot me with an arrow."

He seemed so lost. Daenerys felt for him, but didn't know how to make it easier for him. "I can hit you," she offered.

"Thanks. But it wouldn't have the same effect." Not wanting to talk about Ygritte anymore, Jon changed the topic. "How is Ser Jorah? He seemed to be in pain at dinner."

Daenerys rolled her eyes. "He's being his usual stubborn self. Sam changed his bandages after dinner, so hopefully he is getting some sleep."

"Jorah suffered from greyscale, didn't he?" Jon asked carefully.

"Yes."

"Sam said it was a close call."

"Yes." Daenerys looked into her wine. The dark liquid was moving slightly with the swaying of the ship. "He almost took his own life. The treatment could have killed him as well."

"He is strong."

She looked up from her wine. "And stubborn."

"You said so before. You said he is the most stubborn man you have ever met."

"It's one of his best and his worst qualities."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"About you and Ser Jorah."

She nodded for Jon to continue. That conversation was long overdue.

"I know he's loved you for some time."

"How do you know?"

"I asked him. He didn't deny it."

Of course Jorah wouldn't lie about this. He didn't have a problem with proclaiming his love for her no matter who else was present.

"He made me believe there was nothing between you and him," Jon went on. "I would have never… if I had known it was mutual between you and him…"

"I didn't mean to deceive you. I deceived myself."

"When you called his name when you were sick that should have made me think. But you were having nightmares from long before we even met and you had just told me he had saved your life countless times. So I didn't give it any further thought. And you really had me convinced with your He's my best friend speech."

"He is. I didn't lie to you."

"Well, if you didn't lie, then you certainly left some things out."

"We have a complicated history."

Jon looked at her with raised eyebrows, waiting for her to continue.

"I almost had him killed at one point. Another time I did nothing when someone held a sword to his throat in the fighting pits. I could have stopped it. But I didn't."

"That seems hard to believe."

"I know." The thought sent a chill down her spine.

And then Jon asked the question he had been meaning to ask her all along. "Why did you agree to have dinner with me?"

"Why not?"

"You know what I mean."

"You mean why did I kiss you?"

"Yes."

"Because I wanted to."

"But you love him. You loved him when you came to me." By now Jon was sure of it.

"In case you haven't noticed, you are quite a good catch. You are not exactly bad looking. And you are the King in the North."

"So he wasn't worthy enough?" Jon asked confused. As soon as he had said it, he regretted it though. The hurt in her face showed plainly that he'd offended her. "I'm sorry. It was something Jorah said that made me-"

"Of course, he would say something like that."

"He believed there was something between us."

"There was something between us," Daenerys said. She was wondering if the attraction she had felt back then had something to do with their blood relationship. Maybe Drogon had also felt it when he had let Jon touch him.

"There was more between you and him," Jon said.

Daenerys avoided his eyes.

"I can hardly blame him for wanting you. He'd be a fool, if he didn't."

She looked up and smiled at him, silently thanking him for the compliment.

"And he is a good man."

"He said the exact same thing about you." She was more than glad that Jorah and Jon were getting along so well after all this.

Taking her hand, Jon said, "I am not judging you, Dany. I would just like know. Don't I at least deserve the truth?"

"Yes, you do." She had always meant to tell him the truth.

"Why come to me? I had already bent the knee. What more could you have wanted? You already promised your armies to help us fight the Night Walkers. Did you think you had to add yourself to the deal? Or was it just curiosity?"

"It was a combination of all that, sealing our agreement as well as genuine attraction. That brooding charm of yours is quite intriguing." Daenerys looked at their hands. She knew she was stalling. Jon must have realized it as well, as he gave her hand a gentle squeeze of encouragement. She took a deep breath before she went on. "He rejected me."

Jon looked at her with disbelief, not sure he had heard her correctly. "He… what?"

Daenerys shrugged her shoulders. "I told you. He can be very stubborn."

"Stubborn? I'd call that stupid."

"He was afraid his past would taint my future."

"I see. And now?"

Daenerys grinned. "I am stubborn too." She quickly became serious again and looked at Jon intently. "I want you to know one thing. Jorah and I, we were never intimate with each other before we found out about you being my nephew."

"But afterwards," Jon pointed out, smiling at her. It was his way of letting her know he didn't begrudge her the happiness she had found.

Before Daenerys could reply she saw Jorah entering and coming towards them.

"Here you are." Jorah had woken up with her still gone and wondered where she was at such an hour.

"Sorry, I kept her," Jon said.

"She has a mind of her own." Jorah took off his cloak and wrapped it around her. "Just make sure you stay warm," he said to her. The nights were terribly cold.

When Jorah turned to leave, Daenerys sneaked her hand out from under the cloak and grabbed his good hand. In Dothraki she asked, "Are you feeling better?"

"Yes."

"I won't be long."

Jorah knew Jon needed the company more than he did. "Stay as long as you like. He needs you. And I am going right back to sleep anyway," he said in Dothraki. He raised her hand to his lips and placed a soft but lingering kiss on her fingers.

When Daenerys finally came to bed, she tried not to wake Jorah. But he turned around and opened his arms to her. Mindful of his injuries, she nestled against his chest, enjoying the closeness and the warmth he was giving off.

"How is Jon doing?"

"He has good days and bad days."

"It's a lot to take in."

"It's like he has to reinvent himself. He's a born leader but everybody always told him he couldn't be anything because he was a bastard."

"And suddenly he finds out he is the rightful ruler of the Seven Kingdoms."

"I think it is the right thing to keep it secret for now. Not just because it would weaken my claim and endanger his life even more. But this way he has more time to get used to it. If he doesn't come to terms with this new situation when everybody else finds out… I am worried how he will cope."

"He will rise to the occasion if need be. Like you said, he is a born leader."

"Since when do you have so much faith in people?"

"Not people. Targaryens." He could feel her smile against his chest.