L .

Casanova forever and Never

Chapter 10 Defenestration temptation at Midnight

I groaned in annoyance when the patio door slid open behind me and tapping echoed out into the night air. It meant that either Miroku learned how to teleport or Sango was standing behind me, pissed off.

I was hoping to God that Miroku discovered some magical powers he didn't know he had.

"Inuyasha." A woman's voice growled softly.

Damnit. The monk doesn't have magical powers does he?

"What?" I glanced behind me and saw Sango standing there. Why can't she go home already; she's been here for hours. The sun has already gone down for fucks sake.

"I want to talk to you."

"Go ahead." I grumbled, standing up and dusting off some crumbs from the front of my shirt. Hey, if she wanted to talk she could talk. Doesn't mean I'm going to listen.

"To your face."

"Listen Sango." I sighed, annoyed with her. "You've been here for 5 goddamn hours; 3 of which I spent out here, away from you. Take a hint and go home already woman. This is between Kagome and me. Not you." I glared at her over my shoulder. "So leave and stop shoving your ass where it's unwanted."

Sango snarled at my face then stalked back into the house.

What can I say? She's fucking annoying and I'm a bastard.

It's not fucking news.

"Inuyasha…" The monk beside me began, his hand now resting on my shoulder. "That was a bit…harsh don't you think?"

I shrugged his arm off and stretched. "No. That bitch deserved it." I rolled my shoulders and grabbed the half empty bottle of Vodka and my water bottle. "Ever since she got here she's been filling Kagome's head with a bunch of shit and complaining." Miroku stood up and opened the patio door for me. "Goddamnit none of this is her concern; she's her friend yes but that's as far as it goes." I walked inside, Miroku at my heels.

"For fuck's sake she is not the one marrying Kagome or going to have to deal with the baby. All she gets to do is bitch about everything and say what she thinks."

I glanced at Miroku out of the corner of my eye to see him locking the door and nodding. "All I'm saying is; she's not in the fucking situation. She's just judging without putting herself in my goddamn shoes." I sighed and rubbed my eyes.

Miroku cleared his throat and picked a banana out of the fruit bowl. "I understand where your coming from." He peeled the skin and took a bite and chewed for awhile before swallowing. "You should talk to Kagome about this." He peeled the skin further down, my golden eyes trained on the spotted yellow skin. "Soon. You are right about Sango, you are the one in the situation, not Sango nor I. We can only voice our opinion but nothing more."

I nodded and opened the refrigerator door, absently poking around inside for nothing in particular. "I guess since it's so fucking late you can spend the night." I waved my arm over my shoulder as I spotted a can of whipped cream sitting innocently on the fridge door. A stupid smirk made its way on my face as I shut the fridge door and walked down the hallway; whipped cream in hand.

"…Where do I sleep?" Miroku asked as I jogged up the stair case.

I glanced down at him from atop the stair case and shrugged. "Look around that floor." All I wanted was to find Kagome and fuck her senseless. "Guest rooms are there somewhere." The last thing I wanted to do right now was talk to this guy.

Miroku nodded and wandered off. Fuck yes; at least he got the picture.

If only Sango was that smart.

Speaking of which, where is that bitch? I sighed and made my way to my room, picturing Kagome lying there on my bed with one blanket half draped on her naked body. Maybe her hair would be slightly tousled and cascaded down over her creamy, bare shoulders and her small arms would be clutching the top of the blanket; just barely covering her voluminous breasts.

Damnit. My pants were starting to feel too goddamn uncomfortable.

Anyways I walked into my bedroom and what do I see?

Damn right it wasn't Kagome stark naked on my bed.

It was Sango and Kagome. "Hey…ladies…" A sneaky grin snuck its way onto my face when I saw them on my bed. I clutched the whipped cream in the palm of my hand and walked in licking my lips; maybe if I'm lucky I would-

"Fuck no Inuyasha." Sango spat in my face.

Kagome blushed bright red and nervously played with the edge of a pillow. "Inuyasha!" She chided and glared at me. "Pervert! I'm not-no-you will not! No threesome!"

I sighed and shook my head. "Fine." My fingers racked through my long hair and I tossed the whipped cream on the bottom of the bed. "Then leave Sango." I kicked off my shoes and rolled my shoulders. Too much stress for my poor soul, I'm damn lucky not every girl is this complicated.

"What?" She stared at me.

"I said to fucking leave my house. Are you deaf?" I glared at her. "Leave before I throw your goddamn ass out."

She stood up, trying to test me.

I walked up into her face, my body looming over her. "Leave my goddamn house woman. Before I make you." I flexed my fingers, itching to defenestrate her.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome jumped out of the bed. "Its midnight! You can't make her leave now…it's too late." She glanced at the clock on the bedside table.

Awkward silence.

"I don't like you Sango." I snarled, slowly stepping away from her body and turned to face my bed. Out of the corner of my eye I saw her smirk; a catty, bitchy, idiotic smirk.

It took all my self control to not take her and throw her out the fucking window.

"If it weren't for Kagome…" I began, the muscles in my back flexing as I sat down on the edge of my bed, my fingers running though my hair.

"If it weren't for Kagome you'd what? Try and have sex with me? Filthy bastard." Sango glared daggers at my head.

I lifted my haze from my feet to meet hers and smiled.

A disgusting, sadistic smile.

A smile only a horny bastard like myself could do. "If it weren't for my girlfriend I wouldn't have sex with you, I'd fuck a few times in my bed then I'd grab you by your hair and pin you to the ground and do it doggy style till I got bored. Then I'd probably force you to cook me some food; fuck you in the kitchen, maybe the counter top or table. And finally, when you're so fucking tired and can hardly stand, when your body aches in places you never knew could hurt, when your hair is matted to your face and shoulders and you're covered in sweat; I'd throw you out. Now get out of my house."

L.

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