AN: A special thank you to my beta Midnightquiver for having patience and going over this chapter for me. You're amazing doll! I'll leave my other notes for after the chapter. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: All rights reserve to Charlie Harris and Alan Ball. I don't own anything except my own characters and plot

"Drowning in my own sin brings me the greatest of all pleasures and the most tragedy."

Jessica POV

When I was a little girl, I had dreamed a good christian boy would come and be my prince charming. We would get married, have babies and a perfect life like my mama said I would. Who knew the devil would get me on the night I decided to try and check out a party and those childhood dreams would be lost forever.

I didn't know any better. My parents would home school me and my sister to protect us from all the evil in the world. Especially after vampires came "out of the closet". No going out after dark or staying up past eight O'clock and we had a limit of what we watched on TV. The fear my parents had us living in put me in a cage I never want to be inside again.

Sadly, once I left one cage I was put inside another.

I said I met the devil, and he was called Bill Compton a vampire - who is now my maker. Before I realize what was happening I was being dragged into a crowd, of what I later learned to be vampires, and was bitten harshly and turned. Now, I can testify loud and clear being turned into a vampire sucks and hurts like a bitch! The fangs piercing your neck, ripping and draining you or all life is the painful experience I will ever remember.

The only, good thing was when I swore there was some light at the end of the pain, life was being pushed into me. A new life, a dark life, a life I didn't ask for but will be forever grateful to now have. I could feel it was different, new like a fresh start for me. That adventure I have always been missing in my human life. But no matter how pretty it seemed on the outside, everything has a price.

When I was in the ground after feeling the "life" being pushed into me, it was almost like I was dreaming, but I could feel something building inside, some new bond. Now, I was never really close to my parents, mainly my father. He was a control freak who wanted me to obey his ever wish no matter what the cost. When I didn't, he would take the belt to me until I did do what he said. I was hoping to get away from that kind of relationship one day, but it seems I will always be trapped with those kind of men. They don't want me if they can't control me.

My maker couldn't control me for the time I was "born again" until now. Bill doesn't like any woman he can't control; just look how he treats Sookie. Fucking control freak! But it was his horrible treatment of me that lead to my own self destruction.

That night, when Bill took me into the bar called "Fangtasia", I still laugh at the name, I was exposed for the first time to something new and not in the box I was used too. Not that becoming a vampire is normal, but this was different, he was different. Everything with him was a choice weirdly enough.

Bill dragged me into the office with him inside and all I wanted to do was go back out and feed. That shit he tried to give me in the bottle, True Blood, was awful. It tasted like the milkshake my sister made for me to try that had, eggs, flour, milk, bacon and bananas in it. No one understands unless you're a vampire of how good human blood smelt. It was like being hit by the best scent in the world that left you feeling high. All you would crave to do is find the source of the smell and drink it dry.

I was going crazy because everything was new to me and all Bill wanted to do was put me in another cage and drop me off at the nearest bus stop. He didn't want me or the responsibility that came with creating a baby vampire. Typical of men right? But he did want me, to mold me, make me into something that was special or at least I thought he did.

Once Bill left it was just me and him, Eric Northman my Sheriff I guessed. I don't know much about vampire laws, just not to bite and drain someone in the public. But I addressed him as sir, hey I still had manners you know?

He continued to stare at me, and then he gave me a predatory smile. One that trapped me into something I don't honestly believe I was ready for but craved at the same time. He told me how he would show me what a real vampire can do, what instincts were really made of, the true potential of being a true vampire.

I couldn't wait, and started to ask him a million questions at once. The desire to know more, to experience more, to be free was overwhelming me. As I continued with the questions, another vampire came in the door. She had a lovely black blouse on with a tight pencil skirt - the kind I would see my neighbor's wife wear when she would be on her way to work. Along with, these six inch pumps, her hair was elegantly put up and her make-up was without flaws. She was perfection, if I ever seen it other than the Greek god next to me called Eric.

Maybe I shouldn't have called him a god because he was nothing but the devil. The devil in a black tank top and dark jeans, with his hair flowed around his face and framed it in the most perfect way. His height was at least six feet and four inches and there was something about him that screamed power, and danger. A combination that should have you running but just made me want more with my new vampire instincts. Danger was like an aphrodisiac to a vampire, and I wanted to have a taste.

The woman that came inside was Pam, Eric's child. I was slightly saddened by this because my "maker" left me within the first three hours of me being a new born. I could tell right away that Pam and Eric were very close, so close they could almost read each other's mind. I was jealous.

That night Pam gave me some clothes from her, "last year's collection pile" and Eric then took me out onto the main floor of the club because he said it was time to feed. I was ready I wanted to taste that lovely scent of human blood I could smell everywhere.

I received my first lesson in tasting human blood - but from a donor's bag. He didn't think I could handle drinking from the source yet, so I had to suffer and drink from a stupid bag. Can I say Eric sucks so bad? Well he does suck though, just like all vampires. Bad joke!

It was only two nights later when things started to change. I wanted something and I couldn't figure it out what it was I was craving for - other than blood of course. Eric was fair towards me since Bill had abandoned me a few nights ago, but he always kept his distance. I'm used to it though, seems like all men in my life kept a distance expect when they could control me.

Except for Eric, I don't know if he wants to control me. He told me that first night before I went to "sleep" in the resting spot he gave to me in the back of Fangtasia that I could leave at any time. He never forced me to stay, it was always my choice. That choice he gave me is what drew me to him. Sure he has rules, like all old people do, well he is old over one thousand years. But I always had an option until the fifth night I was staying with him and Pam.

I thought I could get away with it like all teenagers. For fuck sake, I am only seventeen, vampire or not, I don't have a lot of life experience. Hell, the most exciting thing I would do back when I was human was have day dreams about the boys in my secret magazine stash I hid from my parents. If it wasn't the bible, it wasn't allowed in the house; one of the rules my father set down.

Eric wasn't there yet, something about him doing research on some girl named Sookie. Bill mentioned her before; I don't get what is so special about her. I don't know if Pam and Eric knew, but I heard them talking about her a few times. I didn't mean to listen but hey, I can't control my new vampire hearing yet.

But Eric wasn't there so I saw an opportunity. I wanted to taste human blood straight from the source, from a human. I know I can handle it; I've done well with the donor bag of blood. So I set out to find someone to eat so to speak. All I had to do was to make sure I didn't kill the human and everything will be good. Simple right?

Wrong. I found some college guy, who I would date if I was still human - I'm not even sure if vampires date. Anyway, he was near the restroom and Pam was at the door. I notice Longshadow was busy at the bar and Ginger along with the other waitresses and dancers was busy entertaining the crowd.

He was waiting to use to bathroom when I caught his eye and asked if he ever been with a vampire before? Yeah, smooth right? His scent started to grow even more delicious when I mention I was a vampire, I didn't know what cause it, but I wanted him now more than ever. He told me his name was Tim and he was ready for a "good time". It was all too perfect and since no one was around I took him out back and he tried to kiss me.

I panic, not because I didn't want too, but I've never been kissed and as silly as it sounds I wanted it to be special. So I just grabbed his hand snapped his necked back, stared at his pulsing vein, released my baby fangs and drove right in.

Heaven. It's the only word I could think of for his taste was as I continued to drink. I wanted more and more until I could feel myself getting lost into the taste. I knew I had to stop but didn't know when, I figured after I was full was the perfect time. But then I was suddenly torn from him and slammed into the wall of the club.

Eric had arrived and stopped me before I could drain the guy. I've never seen him so angry towards me, annoyed sure, because I know I can be really annoying with all my questions, but never angry. It hurt. I didn't want him to be angry with me, but he told me this was the last straw and I was to be returned to Bill or Billy-Boy, I've found Eric likes to call him.

Tears came down my face, and I made a mess. I hated my bloody tears but I begged him not to abandon me as well. He told me he wasn't abandoning me, but simply returning me to my maker because it was his responsibility to care for me. Eric said he had a lot to deal with his area and I said "you mean Sookie". At that moment his anger turned to rage and he pinned me to the wall of his office where he had been yelling at me since the club was finally closed for the night.

I told him he was abandoning me by giving me to someone who never wanted me or anything to do with me. He was just like the others when I thought he was different always giving me a choice, but this time there was no choice just me being controlled once again. That is when it happened, the beginning of something I don't know if it was ever going to end.

He told me before I was to return to Bill tomorrow at first night, I could have anything he could give me in his power except freedom, because only Bill could truly give me that. He surprised me once again by giving me an option, an opportunity to get something I wanted. I guess he thought I was going to ask for money, car, clothes even some of that rare blend of blood that is way expensive he let me try a few nights ago. But all I wanted was a kiss, a real kiss, my first kiss.

I don't know why I wanted to give it to Eric, but it just seemed right and it's not like I'm going to meet anyone right now. Even though I hated it, during this yelling match Eric was right, I don't have enough control to feed off humans and I don't want to kill anyone. So meeting another man human or vampire - because vampires seemed to hate me for some odd reason, well, the ones I've met her in the bar, I think I deserve to have my first kiss now.

Eric was really silent then after a few minutes he told me to come closer and, as cheesy as it sounds he looked into my eyes and lowered his lips to mine and gave me a kiss, my first kiss. I couldn't believe how good it was. It was like I was on fire and couldn't stop. I didn't want to stop, so I kept going - you only live once right? Well you know what I mean.

So just like that, not only did I give are my first kiss, I gave him my virginity as well. When two vampires get together it's like lust over takes our senses and our need to fulfill that desire. The kiss led to me jumping on him, which led to him throwing me on the desk, and that led to him being inside me and moving at speeds only an one-thousand year old vampire could achieve. Sure losing your virginity on a desk wasn't the most romantic, but I wanted it and don't regret it.

He took me again and again until it was time to rest. He left me to make my way to my borrowed resting chamber. I felt good, amazing even, but I did find out something during our time together. I was still a virgin after my first time. Imagine my surprise when he entered me again and I could feel myself being torn, again! Eric stopped and explained how whatever shape our bodies was in when we were turned, was what they will be forever, I was a virgin when Bill turned me so I will remain a virgin forever because of my healing abilities. Can I say how much this sucks? I'm going to be a virgin forever - literally!

The following night I was returned to Bill, with the excuse of "She is very annoying". Eric didn't mention not once what happen the night before, and he didn't even spare me a glance before leaving with Pam-damn she can work some heels.

It was after that, I was once again put back in a controlled box. I wasn't allowed to drink human blood, donor bag or from the source. Only True Blood. No, leaving the house without permission and I wasn't going to be allowed out anytime soon. I couldn't be alone with Sookie, his girlfriend, yeah a little hard for me to believe and also makes me wonder why Eric and Pam were interested in her. I think the worst part was he only allowed me to dress like I was still human. Church clothes that covered up everything. At first he didn't have any clothes from me and I could only borrow something from Sookie until he got back. The yellow dress she gave me, smelt funny, yeah it was cleaned but I could smell I think sex and dirt on it. I didn't want to ask where it's been.

I felt like I was back home but only this time instead my father was a vampire and I had a stepmother from hell. Bill told me to stop thinking he was Eric, he doesn't have to worry because he is so not like Eric. He wouldn't force me to dress and drink True Blood, and he wouldn't keep me trapped in a house where the only entertainment is a stupid Xbox and the mice in the walls.

I wanted to see Eric again, so while Bill was at Sookie's I left to go see Eric again. I needed to see him again. Is it wrong? Maybe, but I couldn't stop myself my instincts screamed for something fun and it was also screaming for sex. It's like once I started I can't seem to stop myself from wanting more.

Arriving at the club I saw that some other vampire was at the door and I have a feeling if I wasn't a vampire I wouldn't have gotten in. I was dressed in some of the horrible clothes Bill got me so I looked like I was on my way to church, instead of a hot vampire bar. As soon as I stepped in I saw him on his throne. He said to Pam how someone named Bobby, "fucked up". I didn't think it was important so I approached them, and caught his eyes. I asked if we could talk after I greeted Pam and she walked away, and he motioned for me to follow him.

He knew why I was there, what I came for and that was when we made a deal. He gave me the option of walking away, but he told me the "rules" and asked if I understood. I did understand, and I wanted this so I nodded my head and our affair began. He called me his pet, but it wasn't like a vampire and human relationship - I learned this from Pam who told me after I asked why she doesn't date - it was more of a dominance issue when two vampires get together. Plus, I really think its a nickname he enjoys calling me.

Eric wanted to dominate me, use me in a way only a fellow vampire could. Now, I was using him as well, we gave each other release. That is what vampires do; we use each other until something better comes along with no strings attached. We never spoke over the many times we were together, and we never told a soul. Funny how I always had problems with controlling men, yet I enjoyed being dominated by a fellow vampire. Only difference is, if I chose to walk away or end it Eric wouldn't stop me; he has never forced me to do anything with him. I was always left with the option of walking away. I just chose to stay.

Bill was never around and he didn't teach me anything. When we had arrived in Dallas for the trip to save Godric he only taught me about glamour to impress Sookie. I was just a tool for him and only his "child" when I'm useful.

Then everything went haywire with the fellowship of the sun - which I can't stand and I wouldn't mind draining everyone of those bastards and was growing stronger. Then turned out Godric didn't even need to be "saved", I mean couldn't a two-thousand year old vampire think of a better plan than to get himself kidnapped? After that, it turned out there is someone else behind the whole fellowship thing.

It also seemed like Eric and Sookie were growing closer and I hated it to be honest. I found out a few nights after staying with Bill that she could read minds, but only humans as it turned out, thank God. But, I'm feeling a little protective about Eric. No, we are not in a romantic relationship no matter how nice it would be. Vampires like to claim things, people and sometimes other vampires. We feel jealously and different feelings much deeper than we want humans too know. So it's hard to stay away from Eric sometimes, and it's even harder to smell other females on him.

No matter how twisted and dark this entire thing between me and Eric could be it's the only consistent thing in my undead life. The only thing I could count on to be there and make me feel anything other than resentment. Maybe, as a vampire it being something dark and twisted is what makes it appealing to me.

Tonight maybe two hours before dawn Eric came to see me and what was said earlier was still effecting him. Lately he has been nothing but an emotional roller coaster. But, it was different tonight he pushed me, hurt me and tried to break me in different ways. He always had a thing for anal, but tonight he was too rough, no matter about vampire healing, it hurt. So I got pissed and tried to fight him, but it turned him on more, and I was turned on even more as well.

We got lost in the blood lust and he pushed on past dawn. Fire was building inside me and bursting out of control. It was too much for me and I could feel the sun pulling me under, no matter how hard I tried to resist. As my final orgasm ripped through my body, I heard him say my name and froze. He never said my name!

Before I could respond, I was pulled under by the sun and as I started to rest in the cold arms of Eric who was still above me in obvious shock of his mistake. I knew things was going to change forever, after he said my name, something so simple but powerful. So all I can do is wait for the inevitable to happen, but hope for a miracle that it will all be okay.

Godric's POV

Victor and I were discussing our findings the following night after the confrontation of myself and Eric. Things were never to be the same again, they will either become worse or better than before. He may never forgive me, and I don't know if I could live with that for eternity. My child, Eric, hating me for what happen so long ago.

Pulling myself from those thoughts, I focused on the tasked at hand with Victor. "So glad you have decided to pay attention to what I've said Godric." He was staring at me with an annoyed look on his face and looked as if he repeated himself a few times.

"I apologize Victor, now you said more weapons were found?"

He rolled his eyes in a very childish manner before continuing. "Yes, the exact same one we found before that I gave to you in Dallas. They are designed to kill only vampires. They are building an army for war Godric, a war that could eradicate all vampires."

"They want to finish what they started over a thousand years ago." It was worse than I thought, maybe it's best to bring in the Authority. They have yet to know exactly what is going on, as far as they knew only the Fellowship is a threat. The Authority has no idea who exactly is behind the Fellowship, which isn't surprising, because none of the Authority existed back when the war took place.

"Wait, are you telling me this happened before?"

"Victor, history always has a habit of repeating itself. What was started so long ago wasn't ever finished, just postponed. I expected them to come fourth one night; I just didn't expect it to be as organized as it has come to my attention."

"You had knowledge of the fae and did not come fourth and tell the Authority? You have put us all in danger Godric! This should not have been kept a secret! Our survival is at stake, your child's is at stake, you could at least think abou-".

He didn't finish his sentence because I had him pinned down on the floor, with my fangs ready to attack if I chose to. "You should never use my child as leverage in anything. King or not, I will break you like a twig."

Before I could go any farther with Victor, Appuis made himself known. "And you my child should not keep secrets."

Leaving Victor on the floor I get up and turned towards my maker, who was once again smirking at me in his personal amusement. He continued to speak as he stared at me and ignored Victor, who has managed to stand up and look impeccable in his suit like always.

"Victor, our ancient community agreed to keep it a secret because it was too dangerous for it to be common knowledge for a vampire. Fae, are dangerous and lethal to any young vampire under one-hundred years old. Now, children let's focus on what is going on now, not what happen in the past."

He was correct, if we were going to survive this time we needed to put aside differences and focus on destroying our common enemy. We all sit and began to discuss something's when Victor spoke of Compton. "You know he is in alliance with the enemy, why don't we get rid of him already?"

"Because he is just a minor player, I want to see what he is up too and the best way to do that is for him to remain close."

"What about the girl? You know she is with them and will continue to help them."

"You will not touch her."

My maker laughs at my outburst. "Godric you must not grow attachment so easily. You have forgotten everything I've taught you in our years together. Perhaps another lesson is in orde-".

Appuis suddenly stopped mid-sentence. Myself and Victor glance at each other, then back towards him. He never stops suddenly, if anything it's hard to shut him up. Before either of us could question, he is gone and out the window.

What was going on with my maker?

Jason's POV

*drip*

*drip*

*drip*

Blood. It was everywhere. Following with my eyes, I watched as it dripped slowly from my hair onto the body near my feet. It joined the river of bloody tears that has fallin' from my face as well. I lost complete control and abandon everythin' my Gran taught me. I didn't mean too do it! Gosh, everythin' is fucked up. He watched me as I killed that innocent girl. He watched me become a monster like him.

This may be karma comin' after me, just like Sook would tell me all the time. She always said I would get what I deserved for treating others the way I did. Well, it has finally come for me, and guess what, now I'm a vampire. Somethin' I never wanted or even thought about becomin' like.

I've never killed before you know. Wait, that is a lie, I have killed and his name was Eddie - a vampire. Maybe this is what I get for killin' him. He didn't deserve it, I just used him to feed my addiction for V, and now look I could become someone else source for V.

It's been awhile since I have woken up to the carnage I made the night before, and all I have done is stared at what is left of the body. I wish it was a way for me to escaped this prison and finish myself off so I wouldn't have to live with what I've done. But the door is made of silver and it hurts like a bitch, every time I tried to escape. Like, every part of my body was drained.

Suddenly there some weird bright light in the room, maybe God was answerin' my prayers. I wasn't even sure he heard me now that I was a vamp. The light burned and I released my fangs on instinct of the danger. The light suddenly took shape and I saw some man standing there, but I couldn't see his face.

God his scent was amazin', the best thing to ever hit my nose. Even better then my Gran's apple pie! I wanted, no needed to taste him. Just a taste, I wouldn't kill him, not after what I did to that girl last night. But I couldn't help myself as I leaped forward and tried to bite him.

Suddenly, I was thrown back into the silver door and could kill myself bein' burnt from the silver and whatever, he used to throw me from him. Fuck did it hurt!

"You and your sister have always been a problem for our kind."

Wait what? Sook? What does she have to do with anythin'? I stood up as quickly as I could ready to defend my sister. We Stackhouses, protect each other no matter what. "What do you know about Sook? We have never met you at all, I don't even recognize your voice fucker!"

My fangs were out and this time I would be ready for him. He stepped into the light and I gasped and who it was standing in front of me. Why? It didn't make any sense whatsoever. He was our friend as far as I could tell, but why, and what is he?

Before I could question him I noticed the light around him started to glow even brighter and his scent increased as well. Large fangs descended from his mouth, and they looked like somethin' was on the tip of his fangs, unlike my own. The energy around him was dangerous and had me screamin' on the inside. He wasn't a vampire because I could hear a heartbeat.

"Doesn't matter what I know now because I'm going to correct the mistake of you and your sister for ever being born. You first, your sister next."

Then he was on me before I could notice with his fangs inside my neck, burnin' me from the inside. Silver. It was silver on his fangs and it was burnin' so bad that I was paralyze to fight back. I think I was goin' to face what I knew for vampires was the true death. I was okay with this before, but now I wanted answers and couldn't fight back in order to live for me to find out.

Everythin' was goin' dark, or whatever happens to a vamp when we become weak, and when it felt like the burn was bein spread in my body, the weight of him above me disappeared and I fell down to see my maker had arrived and ready to destroy the person who dared to touch me. Maybe I would get the answers, as to what the fuck is goin' on.

AN: So there you have it Chapter 10! I hope this cleared up somethings with Jessica. :) I just wanted to let you guys know, I'm going to go back and redo chapters 2-9. Just to fix certain things, for the plot to make more sense. Then I'll post chapter 11 so everything will be up to date. My goal is to have chgapter 11 up by the end of next week and the redo done by the end of this week. So we will see.

Review! Like it? Hate it? Things you want to see, or think I should improve tell me. :)