Gift From God

Don't ask me why

Don't even try

Chichi flushed. "I just… did you mean… You left me for a decade and now you're just going to… Ugh, go."

She didn't know what she wanted. She didn't think she could take what it came down to: Gokou or Juunana. The feelings for both were sweet and now that Gokou was back…

Gokou lingered in the doorway. "I… Will you be careful, Chi?"

She wanted to scream, 'He won't hurt me!' But another voice replied, 'You didn't think Gokou would either.' Frustrated, she sighed, "I'm a grown woman. I can handle myself."

But she knew it was in her husband… her ex-husband's nature to care for others.

The man let out a deep sigh despite much effort. They were there. They were staring at each other with longing and sorrow and regret and if he'd forgive and she'd forget, then they would be all right and maybe things could go back to how things were before, no, better. And if she weren't so proper, maybe he could hold her again, but he knew very well she'd reject him even if she wanted him as he did her.

Because of Juunana. She wouldn't be unfaithful to Juunana as, he bitterly recalled, she was to him. Of course, could he really call it infidelity?

Hard as it was to come to the truth, he knew he'd lost, he knew he'd failed, in one thing that he did that he knew for sure was not out of the selflessness that he'd been so known for so well.

Chichi avoided his warm, dark eyes staring at her in ways she didn't want to acknowledge. It was stupid of her to ask him to stay when she knew perfectly well she couldn't allow herself to do anything with him, but he looked so sad and she remembered all the reasons she loved him that she'd tried to forget.

Memories and emotion and adoration all came crashing down on her in one weak moment but she stayed perfectly still, still as if she weren't alive, and that was how she felt. He'd killed a part of her and now he wanted to make amends…

Temptation was an evil thing. Temptation was one of a million things, and neither had offered or even suggested that they do anything. Both knew it was there, and it was strong, but Chichi was too proud to just jump in Gokou's arms.

The silence got eerie, the two seemed to be locked inside separate worlds full of windows so that they could see each other, but never talk, and never see what was inside their own hearts, or even inside the other's.

"We've got to talk."

"I don't want to talk anymore." Gokou shook his head. He was hurt and he was depressed and he wanted her to cling to and love and do anything but talk about Juunana and all the wonderful things he'd done for her, they were done with talking. There was nothing else to say.

She crossed her arms over her chest and she could feel a stress headache coming. He was right. She didn't want to talk either, but talking was safer than not.

She didn't know how, or why, but she managed to speak once more, "Are you hungry?"

It was almost ironic that she was the one to mention his stomach. To buy more time with her, he nodded. There was also the fact that he hadn't eaten a decent meal since he was last with her.

Pinks and oranges flooded into the perfect blue sky as the sun dipped down into the horizon. He sat at the table and she set plate after plate before him.

"Will Juunana be back soon?"

She gazed wearily to the side, "Perhaps."

"Will you sit with me?"

Quietly, Chichi sat down beside Gokou. She tried to smile at him. He tried to concentrate on the food before him, but he hardly noticed what was on the plate before him.

"What do you want from me? What did you think you'd accomplish by coming here?"

"I don't know. I want a lot, I guess, if you call getting my family back a lot."

"I can't just leave Juunana." She weakly insisted, "You think you can come back and just ask-"

"No, but I will anyway."

Dazed, she stood. Gokou tilted his head up to watch her as she exited the room, and before he could manage to stand to follow her out, the door closed.

She needed time to think. How could she be so weak? Just being in the room with him, he'd gotten under her skin. And she needed so little, but at the time, he'd thought it much, now he was offering her everything she'd ever wanted.

A nice little life that they could share. A sincerity in his eyes forced her to pay attention though her head was screaming curses constantly and reminding her of all the things they'd been through, but everything else betrayed reason and asked her to go back to him.

How could she just forgive? Pride was such a horrible thing. She couldn't allow herself to be in the same position to be shot in the head by her emotions if he'd leave again, and if they didn't get back together she'd get shot anyway because she'd miss him and she'd think about him cold night after cold night and though Juunana would be there… It was like he was a temporary replacement now.

How could Gokou do this to her?

She'd been a devoted and loving wife to both men and now that Gokou was back there was no way she could win, there was no way she wouldn't end up betraying Juu, whether it be physically or mentally.

Then there was to consider her sons. She'd seen them rarely, it was as if her life with Son Gokou had been a distant dream. Juu didn't ever ask her not to see them, but it was awkward. Somehow, they all just found their own lives.

Gohan would be thrilled if the two were to get back together. He'd been loyal to his father and furious when ChiChi told him about Juunana. It hurt her deeply, but she understood that he, as she did at one time, still thought that Gokou would return one day.

Goten, on the other hand, grew bitter and never mentioned his father. The young man would growl and hiss unkind words when Gokou was mentioned, usually Gohan was the one to mention it, and the two would only stop fighting upon her request.

She was so wrapped up in her own thoughts that she did not know she was being watched. Juunana raised a brow as he watched the two, though he let out a sigh of relief as Chichi exited the little house.

"Chi, you okay?"

She laughed a bit so not to start crying, "No."

Gokou looked at her. Only feet away, she was staring out, she looked so lonely. So sad. His first impulse was to hold her, but after a few steps forward he hesitated. "I don't know what to do."

She looked at him, so calm, so serious, "Neither do I."

Where did they go from there?

Was there a passionate kiss or an anti-climatic step away?

"Can't we just… walk away?"

Chichi laughed lightly, "And go where? And do what? What would we be running from?"

"Juunana's tyrannical hold on your brain and ability to think straight?" She raised a brow and opened her mouth to speak, but Gokou cut her off, "Do you want to go have dinner at Bulma's?"

"You can't just invite me over there…"

"Sure I can. She wants to see you, you know."

"Gokou…"

"Fine. How about a-"

"No, Gokou."

He grinned and his arm slid around her waist. Before she could squeak in protest, she was standing before Bulma

The aqua haired woman stared at Chichi and blinked for a few seconds, having to grip onto the bowl in her hands so that she not drop it due to shock, "Chi-Chan… it's been a very long time…"

Chichi smiled weakly, "Yes… It has. I am so sorry Gokou brought me here, this was a huge mistake, I'm sorry he was so rude-"

"I've been telling him if he insisted on going to see you to invite you over. It's good he finally listened to me."

Chichi sighed a bit, "I really should go…"

"You two're back together?"

"Yes."

"No!" Chichi blushed, "Gokou, because you grabbed-"

"Should I leave you two alone?"

Chichi flushed again, "No… Do you want me to help you make that?"

"You're a guest, Chi…"

"She'll help you." Gokou lightly pushed Chichi into the kitchen.

Chichi could do little but sigh.

"So he's been bothering you lately?"

She nodded, "Not bothering, really… Just… he looks at me and asks me why as if what happens was done to purposely hurt him. Oh, and he wants to completely forget the fact that I'm married and have me go run away with him."

"Do you want to?"

"Bulma, I love Juunana."

"But you love Gokou too." She pointed out.

"You're just trying to get me to lean towards going back to Gokou."

"You're right. It's not my place to ask you." Bulma bent over, trying to examine the mess she'd made.

Chichi sighed, "But, yes, I still care about Gokou."

"I didn't say you cared about him, I said you loved him."

Chichi sighed again, "Now, that, I don't know…"

"You know, I should call Goten and Pan over. They've been spending a lot of time together…" She playfully hit her forehead, "Oh, right! I guess I can't…"

"Why not?" Chichi longed to see her son and granddaughter again and frowned.

"See, as punishment Gohan doesn't want Pan and Bura spending time together, and seeing as Pan is staying with Goten, it would be rude to just invite him. And I know Goten'd bring Pan and Gohan would eventually find out… Plus you know how Goten gets when it comes to Gokou. He's incredibly angry with him…"

"Should I call Gohan?"

"Maybe he'll listen to you. I'm sure Pan'd like to see you again."

"What did those two do anyway?"

"Oh, Gohan thinks Bura's a bad influence. I guess she might be. They just go a little over-board sometimes. It's best not to worry about teenagers too much, though Bura is currently being punished as well."

"What's her punishment?"

"No, Bura! Stop trying to block me with your elbows!"

"But Tousan!" She moaned, "I might break a nail!"

"And if you continue to block like that, you might break a bone!"

"I'm sweaty and smelly and sticky and I've got bruises everywhere!"

Vegeta crossed his arms over his chest. Bura sighed and got into a clumsy fighting stance.

"Hey, Vegeta!"

"Oh, thank God you're here!" Bura squealed, "You can fight with him!"

"Bura, I don't think that's…"

Vegeta smirked, "Take a break, brat-"

"Princess!"

"Brat. And while I pummel Kakarotto over here, make sure you can tell me five things he did wrong by the time we're through."

"But… Daddy! You both go too fast!"

"Then you'll have to learn to keep up."

"But I'm a princess!"

"A princess of fighters, not beauty queens. Keep your eyes sharp and look for energy and not forms."

Bura sat on a bench, sighing, "Yes, Papa."

"Vegeta, are you sure this is a good idea?"

"If you came over here to ask for advice on getting your harpy back as you did my wife, then you should go looking for answers with her."

"But how did you make Bulma fall in love with you?"

Vegeta scoffed, "Make? No one said I wanted her to."

"But then how did she get you to retur-"

Vegeta crossed his arms over his chest.

Gokou sighed and got into his stance. "Watch carefully now, Bura, because your father might make a few mistakes too."

Bulma jumped up upon a loud thump. With a sigh, she instantly recognized the reason, "Ugh, they're sparring again, as soon as I fixed my landscaping from when Goten and Trunks last sparred."

"But isn't Vegeta supposed to be training Bura?"

"He probably got bored with even trying. Apparently, she's afraid to throw a fist and break a nail or to mess up or hair or to get a scratch or a bruise…"

"So she's a bit more lady-like?"

"Not exactly. Vain's more like it. Ladies don't sneak out of the house in the middle of the night and go to clubs and drink and dance with men." Bulma sighed.

"And you're not worried about her?"

"Not really. Vegeta's on the watch and when he doesn't pick them up, Gohan or Goten or Trunks do."

"But the fact that they try…"

"They fail." She shrugged. "The most Bura's ever been able to keep from us was a boyfriend a few years older for about a week."

Chich raised a brow, "I think I'm glad I had two boys."

"Not that Goten didn't have his adventures with my boy."

Chichi nodded, "That is true."

"So tell me, how is Juu?"

"He's fine… He wants me to move out, come to the city with him. He even talked about adopting."

"And what do you think about that?"

She sighed, "Well.. I don't know. I'm way too old for another child. Or even a teenager. I understand we could provide a good home, but I don't want a young one to become emotionally attached to me…"

"And then pass away?"

Chichi nodded, "Juunana doesn't even like the thought of my dying, but I think he was very serious when he asked me to move to the city."

"What about that? Do you want to do that?"

"I'm not so sure…"

"Too many fond memories in that house…?"

"Yeah…"

"With Gokou?"

Chichi set the bowl down, "I'm not going to leave Juunana for Gokou."

"I'm not saying that. It's just that that might be why he wants to move. Gokou's come back, your feelings for him are still tender, why would he want to stay in a house that reminds you of your marriage with him everyday?"

"I've thought of that, and Juu is the jealous type, but I don't know… it seems like he's been planning on moving before Gokou came back."

"So he'd given thought to it and now that Gokou's here, it's become a more necessary thing."

"You really think that's it?" Chichi cocked her head to the side.

"Moving and children? He wants something more serious,"

"We're married. You can't get any more serious than that."

"I'm not so sure. I think he's given thought to it before, but Gokou's the last straw and he's finally brought it to your attention."

"But you make it sound like he's only doing it to turn my attention away from Gokou."

"Are you paying more attention to Gokou than him?"

"No… well, he's back and that's stressful, but he should know that I just wouldn't…"

"Face it, it's all over your face, Chi," Bulma looked back to Chichi, "You missed him and now here's a chance to have the life with him you've wanted since you were a little girl and you don't know if you want to give it away or not."

"You know my situation so well. So what would you do?" Chichi sarcastically asked.

"Well, you have security with Juu, but love for Gokou. Gokou's hurt you but makes promises and you don't know if they're empty or not. Juu wants to pin you down with children and a new location. What sounds better for me is Juu, but I never did pay attention to what's better. That's why I'm with Vegeta and not Yamucha and I don't regret it at all."

The dinner went by slowly. Trunks showed up a few moments late while Goten and Pan managed to arrive fifteen minutes before the table'd been set.

Both granddaughter and son were more than thrilled to see Chichi, Goten giving her a tight hug and Pan tearfully squeezed her grandmother to her breast.

"I missed you so much, Grandma.. You need to visit us more often!"

Chichi laughed a bit, "I know, it's bad of me to not, but it's such a long way."

"You guys could move closer to the city?"

"Actually, we were…"

"Were what?" A battered Gokou stepped out from behind the door. Goten's eyes sharpened but Chichi blushed.

"Nothing."

"Gokou! Look at you! And Vegeta! Go change! You both smell! And throw away the remainder of those clothes seeing as Gokou decided to shred them." Bulma crossed her arms over her chest. "And you can go change too, Bura."

She looked to the girl hiding because of her appearance. Bura made a little squeak and rushed to the sanctuary that was her bathroom.

As Vegeta stomped away, Gokou grinned sheepishly. Chichi did all she could not to stare at his bare chest while setting the food on the table.

"Mom, are you back with this joke?"

Chichi sighed, "Goten, don't speak that way. And no, your father and I are not back together."

"Good. You shouldn't bel-"

"Goten, enough, Dear."

"Yes, Mother."

They sat, Goten to Chichi's right and Pan to her left. Bura sat across from Goten, leaving the spot next to her for her brother. Next to Bura was her mother, Vegeta, and Gokou sat by an annoyed Pan.

"How is Gohan?"

"Stiff, as usual." Pan sighed.

"Yes, I heard about your scene." Chichi looked amused, "Dear, he'll come around. Try and spend some time with Bura tonight."

"But I want to spend time with you… I never see you, Grandma."

Chichi smiled, "I hope that'll change soon. Like I said, it is a possibility that we move out here."

"That's wonderful to hear, Chichi." Trunks bent and kissed her on the cheek before sitting next to Goten and his sister, "It's wonderful to have a sane mother figure around here. Is it wishful thinking that you assisted my mother with the dinner?"

Chichi laughed, "Yes, I helped her. You're too much."

Bulma tried to frown, "Why're you so late home, Mister President?"

"Meeting."

"You mean you were making out with your secretary again. You smell of perfume from Carsona." Bura murmured.

Trunks kicked her from under the table and his mother raised a brow.

" I don't remember any meetings scheduled."

"Oh, of course not, because… Hey, Goten, how is Paris?"

"Stop trying to get me in trouble. You got yourself into this."

Chichi blinked, "Paris?"

"My…"

"Girlfriend." Trunks finished, "A very flashy one, at that."

"Like you don't go through another secretary every month."

Bulma slapped Bura's hand on the table, "Don't be rude, Dear."

"It's true, Kaasan."

"I hope this girl is decent, Goten."

"She's very sweet."

Trunks scoffed.

"Pareasu?" Pan raised her head up, "Hah. She is evil, Grandma."

Gokou sat as silent as Vegeta. Without touching his food, he stood and left the room. Bulma stood but Vegeta shook his head and she sat once more.

Goten and Pan seemed to watch her from the corner of their eyes, waiting for her to stand, and enraged when she did.

"Please don't do this to yourself." Goten murmured through grit teeth.

"Goten… I'll be fine. I'm not going to leave Juu any time soon. I'm just worried about him."

"You shouldn't be. Don't do this."

She was gone.

"Are you going to go back to train that boy?"

"I suppose that's what I should do. He wanted me gone for a few more days so he could train himself. I think I'm done reuniting with my family."

"Goten-"

"I don't understand what's wrong with him."

"He's jealous of Ubuu. You were supposed to train him and Pan and Bura and trust that they could save the world. Your family and friends and the future generation of the Saiya-Jins, but one fine day you leave to go train a boy you've never met before."

"But he's very important-"

"You were very important to him. And then, my condition… He's just very angry with you."

"I didn't do anything to purposely hurt either of them."

"But you did anyway."

"I didn't do anything to purposely hurt you either."

"I know."

"But I did anyway."

"Yes… But I am not angry with you as Goten is."

"Would you take it all back if you could? Never marry me?"

"You know I could but I wouldn't."

"Then marry me again."

Chichi laughed, "And do what? Live happily ever after isolated in the woods while you're across the globe fighting?"

"We could get a gravity chamber."

"And he would be willing to come?"

"I think so."

"And I doubt it."

Gokou sighed, "Can't we work that stuff out later?"

"I'm not-"

He tilted his head down to caress his lips against hers. The gentle movement caused Chichi to fall back in surprise and he gently placed his hand on the small of her back to hold her to him. Her heart raced as her ex-husband brushed his lips against hers in such soft, slow motions, and her mind went blank of all protests.

Slowly, giving in, she took a step closer to Gokou. "Come back…" He whispered, resting his other hand on her cheek. His thumb moved in small circles on her cheek as he fingered through her hair. The pressure pulled her bun out and her hair fell down to grace her back. "Please?"

"I…"

"I love you."

"I love you, too. I never stopped loving you."

"Then what's wrong?"

"I… Juu and I are…"

"What?" He laughed a bit, "You want to move to the city? Do you want what he offers you more than him?"

Chichi blinked, "That's not…"

"Chi… I love you. Do you love me back or do you love him?"

She thought to something Bulma'd asked her before. "Look, if both Gokou and Juunana were hanging off the same cliff, same time, which would you save, ignoring Gokou's flying abilities."

"You know I love you back."

"So then what's wrong?"

"He's my husband-"

"I'm your husband."

She sighed, "You're making this hard to explain. Juunana is the man I am currently bound to by law. I don't think I could ask him for a divorce."

"He's really that great, huh?"

"Yeah.."

"Chichi, Gokou seems so upset. What happened?" Bulma sat next to her on the bed.

"Nothing, Bulma. I really should be going home…"

"I'll drive you."

In the car, Bulma looked sadly to her friend, "So are you going to tell me what happened?"

"Gokou wants me to divorce Juu and get back together with him. I love him still… But Juu…"

"I know it's not really in your nature to cheat or to leave one man for another, but you can't stay with Juu out of propriety or pity. It wouldn't be fair to Juu to think you love him when your heart belongs to someone else. That would be the bigger sin."

They stay in the car. Chichi sighed, "It's just so.."

"Odd? Not really. You convinced yourself you were happy with Juu and now Gokou's back and you realize you're just as alone."

"You really want me to marry him again?"

"I really want you to be happy, and I've seen you with Juu. You just don't carry that same expression of happiness."

Chichi nodded and got out of the car. "Can I stay the night?"

Bulma smiled, "You're always welcome, Chichi."

Pan sighed and leaned against Bura, "I missed you so much…"

"I know.. Your dad's an asshole…"

"What will you do if he won't let me see you anymore?"

Bura sighed, "I think Goten will be our only link for a while."

"What about my grandma? Do you think she…"

"She probably could, but I don't know if she would."

"I should go ask her…"

"I think she needs to talk to Gokou for a while…"

Pan sighed, "Goten's gonna go crazy if they get back together."

"Do you think they will?"

"Probably not."

He was lying on the bed when she entered. She sat at the edge and he moved so that she could lie by him, resting her head against his shoulder.

He turned on his side to face the opposite direction and she leaned against his back, allowing her arm to drape over his shoulder, her hand free to brush against his lips.

Her fingers were cool against his warm lips, "Do you want to come home tomorrow?"

"More than you'll ever know."

8.10