Hey! Look at this! The big 1-0! It'll be great! There'll be cake, and hot dogs, and all my friends will be there...wait...do I even have friends?

Now, reviews!

Arashi IV of V: Well you'll just have to see :)

Thank you to jjlol, Ender the multiverse Detective, smurfninjaman, Youdontseethis, Firehedgehog, D14M0NDHUNT3R, Boots, Candy Phantom, Lion the fox, and XxOmNiPoTent PriMorDial GodxX for reviewing!

I apologize for how short this is, but real life happened (i.e. getting dragged out of my house against my will).

"Students are to report to their respective Common rooms! Prefects will lead their-Professor Toriel, what are you doing?"

"While my child is perfectly capable of caring for themselves, it would put my mind greatly at ease to hated them stay with me tonight."

"Professor Toriel, this is hardly the time to-"

*You tell the professors that you wish to stay with Toriel tonight.

"Very well. As for the rest of you..."

"SANS, NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR YOU TO BE FALLING ASLEEP!" Papyrus exclaimed as he dashed through the corridors, trying to locate his younger brother.

Sans didn't reply, his eye sockets closed in sleep.

With a groan, Papyrus slowed momentarily to shift his brother from under his arm to a two-armed carry, which the sleeping skeleton immediately reacted to by wrapping his arms around Papyrus's cervical vertebrae.

(Somewhere in the school, a group of witches squealed.)

Papyrus picked up his pace again, earning a frustrated swear from Undyne (who had just managed to catch up) about the skeleton's lack of muscles. Unhearing, he sped through the hallways, screeching to a halt when he heard a familiar-sounding voice. "WHAT?!"

He stopped outside of the door the voice had come from. Shifting his brother so that he could to a one-armed Sans carry, Papyrus cautiously opened the door. Once he saw what was inside, he blinked in confusion.

[I told you, the human that smells of death used human magic to bring me to the human-made cave!] the troll grunted in its native tongue.

Mistral, who was grinning up at the troll, was standing in front of a very confused Hermione. "really, they shouldn't have done that to you," he said perfectly in a younger-sounding version of Sans's voice. "could you tell me what the human looked like?"

[My eyes can't see well,] the troll replied. [The back of its head was big, but it wasn't human magic.]

"thank you, bert, Mistral replied. "i'm sorry that they did that to you."

Papyrus's jaw fell to the floor with a clatter, waking up Sans and alerting both the troll and Mistral to his presence. The troll nodded at him. [Greetings, skeleton. It is an honor to meet you and your clan this day.]

After carefully setting his brother down and clicking his jaw back into place, Papyrus posed heroically. "AH, SO MY REPUTATION PROCEEDS ME! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, UNDERSTAND THE AWE YOU FEEL TO BE IN MY PRESENCE!"

Sans grinned up at the troll, his pupil lights twinkling mischievously. "so...you must be life of the party, huh?"

The troll blinked, confused. [What do you mean, skeleton?]

Sans's grin grew. "people must love hangin' out with you when you go clubbing." He turned to Mistral. "so...any reason why you're speakin' my language, misty?"

Mistral tilted his head. "what's that supposed to mean?"

"I'm curious about this as well," Hermione said shakily, unnerved by the troll her friend had been so casually speaking with.

"WHY MISTRAL, IT MEANS YOU ARE SPEAKING IN SANS'S FONT, OF COURSE!" Papyrus exclaimed.

Mistral looked stunned. "wait...that's actually possible? since when?"

Papyrus puffed out his rib cage proudly. "WE SKELETONS HAVE ALWAYS HAD THE ABILITY, MISTRAL! IT IS LIKE THE MAGIC THAT IS OUR FONT...BUT IT ALLOWS US TO COPY ANOTHERS' FONT SO THAT WE CAN BE UNDERSTOOD!"

[Skeleton Mistral, it is known by all in my clan that skeletons can speak to all,] the troll interjected. [Many generations ago, they helped keep peace by translating for those who did not speak as I.]

Hermione frowned. "What did he say?"

"he said that skeletons were translators," Mistral explained.

"Skeletons were...translators?"

Surprisingly, it was Sans who answered. "translator, diplomat, and guard all rolled into one. who needs to guess someone's intentions when your translator has the ability to see how much LOVE everyone has? we were the neutral third party."

"really?"

"SANS IS RIGHT," Papyrus said with a nod.

Mistral and Bert the troll were enraptured by the history lesson, neither knowing just how much skeletons had mattered. Hermione saw an opportunity to learn more. "Why did the skeletons stop? So many wars could have been stopped if only someone could have readily helped with international politics!"

The bathroom fell silent, both Sans and Papyrus bowing their heads. Bert automatically followed their lead. Hermione seemed to realize that she said something wrong, because she immediately tried to backpedal. "Sorry, you don't have to answer tha-"

"I...SANS...ERM..." Beads of sweat formed on Papyrus's skull. "COULD...COULD YOU EXPLAIN?" At the looks of surprise from those around him, Papyrus forced himself to perk up. "I WOULD EXPLAIN, BUT I MUST BRING THE OTHER MEMBERS OF THE HOGWARTS STAFF HERE TO SORT OUT OUR SITUATION!" Before anyone could react to the skeleton's sudden change in emotion, Papyrus had fled the bathroom.

Bert, surprisingly, was the first to break out of his daze. [Will Skeleton Papyrus be sound in mind? He looks sad.] Quietly, Mistral translated for Hermione.

"he'll be fine, no bones about it," Sans punned, his smile forced. "so...ya wanna know why we stopped helping, kid?"

Bert and Mistral waited silently as Hermione nodded.

Sans closed his eye sockets and sighed. "a peaceful skeleton village was attacked. 200 or so dead, no survivors. lucky that it's nearly impossible for a human to take a monster soul, amiright?"

The reactions were immediate. Bert tightened his grip on his club. Hermione gasped in both horror and shock. Mistral subtly inched away from Hermione.

Despite the responses he received, Sans continued, knowing that Mistral had to find out eventually (and would push a lot harder than Papyrus would to be told). "'cause skeletons are a type of monster-"

"Isn't that the politically incorrect term?" Hermione interrupted. "Aren't you Magical Creatures?"

This time, Sans translated what she said before picking up on Bert as he spoke. [No. Skeletons and those like them have no true name for their clan. Most called them 'Children of Magic', but scared humans began calling them monsters. When the monsters vanished, humans took the honor of 'Children of Magic' for themselves.]

"wow," Sans said, his expression as unchanging as usual. "didn't know that."

"The story?" Hermione prompted.

Sans paused for a moment before simply replying, "nope."

Mistral frowned. "why not?" That was when he heard a familiar song blaring. "oh no..."

The door separating the bathroom from the hallway as the song looped again, the booming kick emphasizing the beat. "You're going down...troll?" The music sputtered and died as Undyne stood in the doorway, confused. The spear in her hands faded out of existence.

Several teachers followed her, their wands raised, putting Bert on the defensive. McGonagall cleared her throat. "Back away from the troll. It isn't safe."

"NO! BERT IS NICE AND WE MUST HELP HIM TO GET HOME!" Papyrus yelled from behind the professors. He pushed his way to the front before posing, the ends of his scarf fluttering in the wind that wasn't there. "DO NOT FEAR, FRIEND BERT, FOR I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, ASSURE YOU THAT MY HUMAN COWORKERS WILL BE ABLE TO HELP YOU TO GET HOME!"

"It is just a troll, Fortissimo," Snape said flatly. "It will not be able to-"

To the shock of the professors (minus Sans and Papyrus), the troll dropped to one knee, his head bowed. [I thank you for this, skeletons. It comforts me that the true Children of Magic live and are just as Shaman William told.]

"and how exactly did he say we were?" Mistral asked curiously.

The troll smiled softly, although on his face, it looked more like a grimace. [Understanding, willing to listen, kind. Until we met, I had never seen a small one greet one of my clan with no fear.]

Mistral smiled back. "glad i didn't disappoint too much"

McGonagall decided to try to gain control of the conversation. "Professor Sinestra, Professor Flitwick, would you please escort..."

"bert," Mistral supplied.

"...Bert, to Professor Dumbledore with instructions to get him...home..." As the teachers retreated with the troll, McGonagall, as though seeing Mistral and Hermione for the first time, glared at them. "You two are both supposed to be in the Common room! What was going through your heads?"

"lady, if i could interrupt your rant?" Sans broke in. "misty went to look for the kid before turbs started screamin' about a troll. the kid was in here 'cause one of their housemates practically said to her face that she had no friends. tibia honest, i don't see why a bullied kid and their caring friend should be punished for something they didn't know about."

Snape scowled. "Pianissimo, just because Mistral is your son-" Before he could get any farther, Sans, Papyrus, and Mistral all began laughing.

"i'm gonna crack a rib!" Mistral choked out, to which Papyrus nodded an agreement.

Sans recovered the most quickly. "misty's my little bro, just like paps."

"What?" Hermione asked almost silently, stunned about both revelations.

Papyrus, not hearing the young human, frowned down at his little brother. "MISTRAL? HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN SPEAKING IN SANS'S FONT?"

Mistral shrugged. "since a few seconds after i met bert. why?"

"...MISTRAL, IT WOULD BE BEST IF YOU STAYED WITH SANS AND I TONIGHT," Papyrus said, his voice wavering slightly with emotion. "OR MAYBE OVER THE NEXT FEW DAYS, DEPENDING ON HOW LONG THIS TAKES."

Snape narrowed his eyes. "How long what takes exactly?"

Before anyone could react, Papyrus had lunged forward and tucked Sans under his right arm and jstral under his left. "WOWIE, IT'S GETTING RATHER LATE! IT'S PAST MISTRAL'S BEDTIME AND HE STILL HASN'T EATEN DINNER! I MUST RECTIFY THIS IMMEDIATELY!" With that, Papyrus ran off, leaving several very confused professors, an amused student, and a fish monster that was just comin out of her shock of seeing a creature she had been told was a dangerous killing machine having a friendly conversation with her friends.

"MISTRAL, I KNOW YOU CAN DO THIS! FOCUS IS KEY!"

"yeah, c'mon, misty. just do it."

"IGNORE SANS AND HIS MEMEING, BROTHER!"

"okay, so i just keep talking like this and I'll just switch? WOW, THIS IS REALLY WEIRD. HOW AM I EVEN DOING THIS RIGHT NOW? DID I GET IT?"

"...little too far there. you went caps lock."

"YOU SOUNDED LIKE ME FOR A MOMENT, BUT THEN SWITCHED TO...WHATEVER IT IS YOU ARE SPEAKING."

"CRUD. LET ME JUST TRY AGAIN..."

"NO! IT PUTS TREMENDOUS STRAIN ON ONE'S MAGIC TO SWITCH FONTS THAT MANY TIMES IN A ROW! YOU MAY NOT TRY AGAIN UNTIL TOMORROW!"

"BUT-"

"paps is right. magical exhaustion isn't very humerus."

"THANK YOU, SANS! I AM VERY GLAD THAT...SANS!"

"TIBIA HONEST, I FOUND IT FUNNY."

"AAAAGH!"

Bonus points to whoever can tell me what the trolls' names are referencing.

Mistral switched from Sans's font (unknowingly) to fontless to Papyrus to Wingdings in a span of roughly half a minute. Considering how much of a drain it should have been in him to do one switch...yeah.