Author's Note: If I could scream from the rooftops how sorry that I am for ghosting you all, I would. I am SO so sorry about not posting since January. I tried so hard to keep up with this story while I have been going through this semester and it just wasn't happening. Any time I had a break and tried to write, nothing came out right. This story is my baby, honestly, so the idea of posting anything that wasn't 100% of what I wanted it to be felt so wrong and I didn't want to disappoint you guys either. Then, suddenly I didn't have the time to write at all. If it wasn't school or work related, I didn't do it. But I'm taking my very last final on Tuesday! I was so burnt out that I took some days off work to breathe and study. And suddenly I had the urge and the ability to write? And the things I wrote didn't come out sounding like complete trash? I went back and edited the hell out of what I had already written and finished up this chapter. I'm not officially back yet, unfortunately. My final is Tuesday, but it's my last final EVER. So I'm going to be going through a huge transition afterwards as I gear up for graduation and my state test to officially be able to get a job legally. I should be back to regular updates around May 18th.
Thank you so much for everyone who is still following, and still plans to follow this story. You guys are absolutely amazing for the support I've gotten while I was away. I hope you don't hate me. I hope you enjoy this chapter!
Chapter Ten
The room was quiet when Izuku woke up. He groaned as he put his hands over his eyes before taking in a deep breath. The air was cold as it filled his lungs, almost pulling him back to reality. Still, his mind was replaying the images of his dream over and over. He ran a hand through his hair and stared up at the ceiling. Kirishima cornering him in the laundry room the other night really messed him up. His dreams had taken a life of their own the past two nights.
It hadn't helped that studying with Kaachan had felt so…weird that night, either.
They hadn't spoken much, which was still normal, more-or-less. But Izuku had felt like Kaachan was watching him the entire time they studied. Well, he kind of was watching him the whole time. Any time Izuku would get that nagging feeling that eyes were boring holes into the side of his head, he would look up towards the blonde that was sitting on his bed. Red eyes would immediately flicker down to the notebook in Kaachan's lap the moment they met the sight of Izuku's.
The whole time Bakugou had been there, Izuku's cheeks felt like they were on fire. Whether it was because of the conversation with Kirishima or the fact he knew Kaachan was looking at him, he wasn't sure.
Then, when Izuku had asked if it was okay if they trained on Saturday morning instead of Sunday, it was like Kaachan just bristled defensively. Izuku couldn't even remember the last time that Kaachan had looked so guarded around him. He had asked why, Izuku mentioned that he wanted to see Uraraka this weekend but the only day she was able to was on Sunday morning. Izuku had made sure to tell Kaachan that they could still study together Sunday night, but the other boy just seemed put off by the whole conversation.
He did agree to train on Saturday, though.
After he left, which wasn't long after that, Izuku read through the texts he'd shared with Uraraka. He'd asked her right after he got back from the laundry room if she could meet up with him to get some mochi and talk the following day after class. She had said she'd loved to, but asked if it could wait until Sunday morning because she was going to see her parents to celebrate her dad's birthday immediately after school let out. When he didn't respond immediately, she had sent another text telling him that if it couldn't wait then she could tell her parents something came up at school. As much as he wanted to take her up on that offer, he knew how much her parents meant to her. So, he had told her to go see them and he'd see her at her favorite mochi shop Sunday morning.
But knowing he wouldn't be able to get these feelings and all this information off his chest just made his mind run wild. Falling asleep had been more of a job than it should've been, honestly, but dealing with the dream that accompanied his sleep had been its own version of torment.
It had started innocently enough. He was at a class get-together at laser tag, when suddenly he was sitting down in a dark room staring down a hallway, aiming for anyone that came through the doorway. The feeling of déjà vu was so strong, but he couldn't place why; he just felt like he'd been there before. After ages of just sitting there, he'd leaned his head against the wall behind him. That's when Bakugou had shown up. He had kneeled in front of him, put hand next to Izuku's head, then lifted his chin with his other as he leaned down. The kiss had been fierce the moment their lips touched. One of Izuku's hands had immediately ran through the blonde's hair while his other arm wrapped itself around his waist. Izuku had pulled him close until he could feel the warmth of Kaachan's chest tickling his own.
It had felt like he couldn't breathe if Kaachan wasn't there.
He had been so embarrassed about that dream that he couldn't even look at Kaachan all day on Friday. Actually, he had done everything he could to avoid him. The moment Kaachan had walked into the room, Izuku made sure to start a conversation with someone else. If they were paired up together while training, Izuku would end the match as soon as possible and walk away. When Kaachan tried to study on Friday night, Izuku had made up an excuse about being too tired.
But when he fell asleep last night, it didn't get any better.
In that dream, they were in Kaachan's room. They had been watching a movie while sitting on Kaachan's bed when Kaachan laughed. Izuku can't even remember why it happened, but hearing that sound was just so…nice. He had turned to look at Kaachan when the blonde met his gaze. They stared at each other, Izuku's stomach in his throat, when his eyes flickered towards Kaachan's lips. Izuku bit his own lip and gently pushed Kaachan onto his back. He found his way between the blonde's legs, leaning over him. Their eyes were locked onto each other's, lips grazing ever so slightly, warm breath dancing across their lips in place of true contact. They had sat like that for what felt like eternity when Izuku felt his eyes and the small distance between them closing simultaneously.
The moment their lips had touched felt like fire. A slow burn at first, but after a few long and chaste kisses, they were suddenly deeper and more…needy. Hands were pulling at hair, at shirts, the waist bands of shorts; fingertips tracing the outline of muscle and fingernails digging into skin.
That's just…where he was right now. His mind kept replaying that scene over and over and over…and over. He could still feel the tickling touch of Kaachan's finger discovering the dips and curves of his abdomen, the way Kaachan's back rippled under his fingertips.
He shook his head, rolling over and shoving his face into his pillow to let out the groan that was bubbling up from his throat. How his mind had reacted to the idea of getting close to Kaachan was the most unfair thing to ever happen to him. His imagination was going to be the death of him.
The alarm beside his bed rang out, causing him to sigh as he reached up to turn it off. He wasn't really sure if he could face Kaachan like this, but what choice did he have? He turned him down from studying yesterday because of the first dream and then the one he had last night was even worse. Obviously putting distance between them didn't help anything. Maybe if he actually faced Kaachan head on, proved to himself that Kirishima was overlooking things, then his mind would stop torturing him.
But the entire walk to the running track his nerves were doing their fair share of torture. Everything in him was screaming at him to not go, that he'd do something to embarrass himself, that he'd screw up what him and Kaachan had made of their new friendship.
When his eyes landed on the blonde, his heart stammered in his chest and he could feel his stomach sitting at the back of his throat. Bakugou was doing his usual warm up, a mixture of push-ups and mountain climbers. He always liked to say that it was a "dynamic warm up for all the muscles" and refused to let anyone tell him differently.
The thought was enough to pull Izuku from his anxiety with a small smile. Kaachan was so stubborn about so many things, it was one of the reasons Izuku looked up to him so much. He always knew what he wanted, how to get it, and didn't let anyone stand in his way.
Unlike Izuku, who wasn't sure how to handle even knowing what he wanted when it came to Kaachan.
He stretched his arms and he got closer to the other boy, watching how straight his back stayed and how his muscles moved with so much fluidity.
He swallowed hard. He had to stay calm. There couldn't be any getting distracted by how Kaachan looked today. That was the entire issue with his situation.
"Good morning, Kaachan!" He greeted with a grin.
The blonde glanced at him, but continued his warm up for a few more repetitions before sitting up on his knees. He eyed Izuku up and down before nodding his head at him in greeting. Izuku couldn't help but frown a little. Something was off.
"Are you mad at me for changing the day?" He cleared his throat after he spoke, his voice had come out a little raspier than he had planned.
Bakugou rolled his eyes, muttering a quiet 'no' as he stood on his feet and walked to their normal sparring area. Izuku followed suit, watching the other boy cautiously.
"Is something wrong then?"
The blonde exhaled sharply as he turned, taking his sparring stance. "No. Let's train."
Izuku sighed in defeat, nodding as he took his own stance. If Kaachan didn't want to talk about it, he wouldn't make him. It would just serve as a distraction for both of them, anyways.
Izuku took off immediately, stopping just short of running into Bakugou before swinging his leg up to land a kick on his side. Bakugou jumped backwards then used the momentum of hitting the ground to slingshot back towards Izuku, landing a right hook to his face before putting distance between them.
Izuku blinked as the stinging started in his cheek. A frown followed as he watched Bakugou study him for his next move. He nodded to himself before taking off towards him again, swinging wide with a right hook. As Bakugou lifted his arm to block, Izuku followed through with a kick to the blonde's side. Bakugou sputtered as he grabbed Izuku's arm and drug him to the ground with him.
The air around them seemed to thicken, Izuku panting ever so slightly as he stared down at the boy below him. Their eyes seemed to dance with each other as their breath mixed in the air. It was enough to bring heat to Izuku's cheeks.
Bakugou bucked Izuku to the side, straddling his thighs and pinning his arms to his sides. His usual smirk spread across his lips as he looked down at Izuku.
"I win." He gloated.
Izuku nodded quietly as the blonde stood and offered a hand down to him. He hesitated for a second before grabbing it, pulling himself up. Maybe training with Kaachan actually was a bad idea today. They had only went one round and he was already distracted by being so close to Kaachan. If he wasn't careful –
A kick to his stomach stopped him mid-thought, knocking all the air from his lungs. He gasped for air, coughing and sputtering as he put distance between the two of them. Bakugou was grinning at him when Izuku turned to look at him. Izuku bit his lip, frowning, before taking off towards the blonde.
If he wasn't careful, Kaachan was going to take every opportunity he had to land a punch – or a kick, apparently.
Bakugou swung wide as Izuku closed the distance between them, but Izuku ducked down to swipe the blonde's legs out from under him. Bakugou teetered to the side, landing hard on his arm before spinning into a crouch. Izuku grinned up at him as he tackled him at the waist, pinning Bakugou's arms under his legs. The blonde sneered as he struggled under Izuku.
"I win." Izuku mused, before standing and offering a hand down to Bakugou.
He took it, pulling himself up. They both stretched their arms out before taking stances again. Izuku couldn't help but notice the sweat forming on Bakugou's face as a single droplet slid its way down his temple and clung to his chin. He swallowed hard, taking a deep breath to regain his focus. The last time he didn't focus, Kaachan landed a really good kick.
But it was so hard.
Izuku chewed on his lip as he stared at the blonde. There were so many things he wanted to do, to say. There were so many questions he had, especially after talking to Kirishima. His mind had been on overdrive since that night, whether he was awake or not. Why did Kaachan start calling him by name? Why did he agree to study with him? Why did he let him borrow his clothes? Why was he okay with sleeping in the same bed together? Why was Kaachan so at ease with him here recently?
Honestly, all he had to do to get those answer was just…move his mouth.
He swallowed hard. "Hey…Kaachan?"
The moment the words left his mouth, his back slammed to the ground. Bakugou pinned him down, glaring at him. Izuku groaned before bucking Bakugou over his head and scrambling to his feet, standing defensively.
"You can't act like I'm the one who isn't in the right mindset and then give this shit show of a training session." Bakugou growled, cracking his knuckles.
Izuku swallowed as he watched the blonde carefully. "It wasn't the plan."
Bakugou closed the distance between them quickly, swinging. Izuku blocked with his arm before rotating and landing a kick to his side. The blonde grunted, grabbing Izuku's leg and jerking backwards enough to make him lose his balance. Izuku struggled to stay upright before he decided to squat down and lunge at Bakugou. He tackled him, straddling his hips as he pinned Bakugou's wrists above his head.
Izuku took a few deep breaths in an attempt to quit panting. "I wasn't ready." He breathed.
The first thing Bakugou did was roll his eyes, which was expected. He was always the one to say that a hero is always ready and berating people who didn't work on their instincts in a fight. The second thing he did was give an overconfident smirk, which was not expected. Izuku pushed his wrists down harder into the ground in an attempt to stop whatever the blonde was planning, forcing their faces closer together.
It was the warm breath that tickled his lips that had alarms blaring in his mind about just how close it made them. Bakugou was still giving that same look, completely unfazed. Izuku swallowed for what felt like the hundredth time; he just couldn't get that feeling of something sitting in the back of his throat to go away.
Bakugou ran his tongue across his upper teeth, causing Izuku's heart to stutter and his breath to hitch.
"Can't say I took you as a top, Izuku." He taunted, his smirk still unwavering.
But that was all it took to shatter Izuku's resolve. Everything around them seemed to fade away as Izuku studied the boy below him.
Kaachan's chest was rising and falling irregularly as he worked to breathe normally, sweat was glistening on his skin in the morning sunlight. His piercing red eyes were watching him smugly as he prepared for the response Izuku would have. Instead, Izuku unclasped his hands from around Bakugou's wrists and planted them on each side of the blonde's head.
Izuku bit his lip as he watched Bakugou's brows furrow in confusion.
He was so close, Kaachan's body was so warm. He wanted nothing more than to know what Kaachan's lips actually felt like against his.
Slowly, Izuku leaned down until their lips were only separated by a fraction of air. His eyes never left the red ones that were now widely staring back into his. He heard Bakugou swallow before he let out a breath that danced across Izuku's lips. Both of them were breathing harder now than when they landed; Izuku could feel their chests touching as they inhaled at the same time.
All he had to do was just move forward.
If he just moved forward….
It felt like a mixture electricity and warm velvet all at once when their lips just barely grazed each other. Bakugou's breathing came to a sudden halt as soon as it happened.
Izuku froze, swallowing hard. Everything was moving in slow motion and way to fast all at once as he realized what he was doing. His heart crashed against his chest, trying with everything it had to get out. His lungs burned, his throat burned, his cheeks burned. Everything felt like it was on fire.
He shook his head as he sat up abruptly, crawling backwards off of Bakugou, sputtering some jumbled version of "I'm so sorry", "I didn't mean to", and "that wasn't what it looked like". Bakugou sat up, rubbing his bottom lip with his thumb as he stared at Izuku incredulously.
Izuku could feel how wide his eyes were as he gawked back at the other boy.
What had he done? Why had he done that? Did Kaachan really say his given name? Why didn't Kaachan force him off? This wasn't another dream, was it? What was he going to do? Kaachan must be so angry right now.
There was nothing he could say that was going to fix this.
"Why–" Bakugou started, but was interrupted with Izuku jumping to his feet.
"I'm so sorry, Kaachan!" He yelped out as he turned on his heels and ran back to the dorms.
His chest was still burning when he made it back to his room and sunk to the floor.
After all of the friendship building they had done…after all of that….
What was he going to do now?