Sunday, May 29, 2022, 12:30 pm

(Alba is 20, Pete is 23)

Alba: I have learned that Pete and his brother look nothing alike. Pete's face is soft and radiates his down-to-earth qualities. His brother's is strong and rough, and he looks like he's always contemplating life. The only thing they have in common is their brown hair – though Tommy's is a shade or two darker. Tommy and his fiancée, Princess Diana's clone in my opinion, sat to my left. They were the only members of his family who showed up. His grandparents on his mother's side were both dead, his mom was…with them, his father's parents were in Wales and I don't know where his dad was. I didn't wanna ask Tommy. I wondered if Pete knew.

It was after the graduation ceremony when I figured out that he didn't. He jogged up to us; his smile was practically stretched across his face. I couldn't help but smile too. Tommy gave him a "man-hug" and said "Congrats, Pete. You didn't fail out of college."

"I know. Surprise, surprise right." His eyes darted from Tommy to Elizabeth- the fiancée- to me. Tommy was saying something about the fruits of labor when Pete cut him off "Hey…where's dad?" Pete has never said anything good about his dad, to me at least. I wondered why there was such a sincere tone in his question, not mockingly like I had expected. "…where's dad?" His dad who put him through grade school, then middle school, high school and now college; his dad who should be here congratulating his son for receiving a special award for his proficiency in languages, leadership and a commemoration for leading the Duke's Men to victory three years in a row, and his diploma, which made him an official Yale graduate.

Tommy coughed awkwardly "Well…he…got caught up in the hospital. He's been made the head of the Cardiology Department." For a second Pete's eyes read – "You're kidding, right?" just for a second. He then shrugged and smiled saying "Right. Yeah."

"Congratulations, Peter" Elizabeth said in her thick Swedish accent, giving him a peck on each cheek. "Thanks." He turned to me and grinned. I handed him the stuffed bulldog in a toga and gave him a huge hug "Happy graduation, Pete!" I whispered. Pete practically had me on tip-toe with his huge hug. When he let me go he planted a huge kiss on my cheek and said "Well, I'm starving. Let's go to Lovees."

Lovees is a tiny Filipino cuisine restaurant Pete found in one of his 'adventures', meaning he was with his hippy friends on a joy ride around the state. It's a family owned restaurant, which is why I think Pete likes it so much, because it's so snug. Their menu's pretty simple, burger steaks, sausages, pork barbeque- all with rice, naturally. My favorite thing about Lovees is the friend egg; it's cooked in the shape of a heart. They also serve Filipino favorites. Like Sinigang- a really sour vegetable soup- Adobo- it's a certain way of cooking meats of vegetables in soy sauce- Pinakbet- another vegetable meal- and desserts like ensaymada, bibingka, halo-halo and other really good food. It's a really great food tripping place since it's really cheap.

When we arrive there's a huge banner slung on the far wall that says "Happy Graduation, Pete!" I had called them the other day to tell them that in all probability we would be eating here for his grad lunch. Mang Arnold, the owner, ran up to us and gave Pete a big hug and started talking in really fast Tagalog. Pete answered him and they walked arm-in-arm to a table laid out with graduation themed confetti. I let Pete do the ordering, though I ordered a glass of gulaman for myself.

Pete and his brother didn't really talk much. Elizabeth kept the conversation up, talking about the wedding later on in the year. It was going to be in Sweden, in the tiny chapel in the village which she had grown up in and, as Pete jokingly told me when Tommy and Elizabeth left, there would be "many different herrings." In an insanely hilarious and cartoon-like Swedish accent. We stayed in Lovees until around 8 in the evening, and I had never eaten so much food in my life. I really felt like I would explode. Pete had suddenly gotten silent and began spinning his fork on the worn plate.

It's interesting how good he was at hiding his emotions. The entire afternoon he had been the best graduate ever. Laughing at every joke, making equally or more funny jokes, keeping up the conversations, assuring his brother that he knew just what to do with his life even though he didn't have a clue and pretending that he understood why his father couldn't be there. He acted though everything was working out, because in truth, it really wasn't. He and Red had planned to go backpacking through Africa during the summer after college, which is why he hadn't done anything to secure himself a job. Red had dumped him a day before the graduation for their Spanish teacher's daughter, he wasn't sure if he wanted to laugh or cry. Then of course his dad hadn't shown up, or even called, or even answered his phone when Tommy tried to call him.

I did the first thing I could think of. I hugged him. He rested his head on my shoulder and I felt a few tears run down my neck. "He hates me" Pete breathed through his sobs. I couldn't say anything. I just hugged him while he cried. I'd like to think that that's the best thing a friend can do.

Tuesday, June 10, 2025, 12:30pm

(Pete is 26)

Pete: Her eyes were huge. I could tell that she didn't know what to say, what to feel; there was happiness, there was sadness, there was panic even. Her fork was resting on a bed of lettuce, her finger was resting on its. "What?" she finally whispered.

I have to take a deep breath before repeating it: "Alba's pregnant, mammy."

Clare shakes her head slowly, and then she nods. Alba doesn't know that I'm having lunch with her mom, I told her I had to meet with my manager, and she bought it. I've been calling Clare 'mammy' for the longest time. It started when she bought me a 'Gone with the Wind' tin lunch box for the surprise birthday party Alba threw for me when I got back from Wales. The name stuck.

"You're not happy?" she asked.

"I don't know. I know I am. Inside."

"It's yours though, right?"

"Yes. As far as I know."

"Are you guys gonna get married?"

"No. I want to. I've wanted to. But…you know. She doesn't want to mess up the future because 'future Pete' said we're not…and it's just…"

"What?"

The only person who I could talk to about Alba was her mom. Sure, my friends once in a while. But they'd never get it. Never. Because none of their girlfriends have been able to time travel. Clare would know. Clare understood. She understood the worry, the long periods of absence, the confusion. She knew, and she wanted to help me, because I knew too.

"Let's say 'future Pete' didn't lie. And we don't get married. What happens to Alba? What happens to the baby? Is…is she…" I lower my voice "will she lose it? Will…she…" my eyes hurt, my voice shakes "will I lose her?"

Clare's eyes tear up: "I don't know. She…might lose it. But I don't know what next. I lost six."

"Yes."

"Do you think you'll lose her? We'll lose her?"

It's hard to look at Alba's mom and say this: "I don't know."

Later

I drove Clare to the airport, because it seemed like the right thing to do. I waited as she checked herself in for her flight to Chicago. I walked her to the security gate.

"Maybe I should move back here for a while." She said, turning to me. I shrug. She gives me a big hug.

"Why do we let these time traveling people screw our lives over?" she asked, smiling sadly.

I can't help but smile "I'd like to think it's because we love them."

She takes my hand and squeezes it: "It is."

"Yeah."

"Take care of her. Of both of them."

"I will."

"I know." Then she takes her bags and I watch her pass through the metal detector. And I'm not sure how long I'm standing in the check-in terminal of the airport. I'm happy and excited; because I might be a dad. I'm terrified and nervous; because I might lose one or both of them. I hope I'm over thinking the situation.

Wednesday, February 22, 2034, 5:00pm

(Pete is 35)

Pete: I had been sitting in the hallway for two hours. I knocked on his blue door again. "Please open the door. Please. Please."

"I don't want to. I don't." Franc said. I jiggled the house keys in my hand, it would be so easy to just unlock the door and walk in. But he didn't deserve that, he deserved his privacy. But I deserved to know what was wrong. Right? Damn, I thought, what do I do, Alb?

When I picked Franc up from school he was silent and stone faced the whole ride home. We passed by a billboard of a movie I was in that was coming out soon. He would usually point to these movie ads, or CD posters and say "Look, dad! It's you!" and I would smile and nod and if it was a movie he would ask "Can I watch that?" and I would say "Maybe." But he didn't do that today. And I waited for him to. But he didn't. Then I felt uncomfortable because I knew that something was wrong. Upon parking the car in the garage he ran out and locked himself in his room. He hadn't come out since. Even when I cooked his favorite sausages and practically emptied the ketchup bottle on it; the way he always ate them.

"Okay." I said "I'll be in the music room." So I went to the music room and sat at the piano and wondered what could be wrong. The keys felt smooth and moved smoothly as I played a chord. And then another one, then I sang the song I had heard on the radio on the ride home.

"Oh, why you look so sad? Tears are in your eyes
Come on and come to me now.
Don't be ashamed to cry, let me see you through
Cause I've seen the dark side too.
When the night falls on you, you don't know what to do,
Nothing you confess could make me love you less
I'll stand by you, I'll stand by you, won't let nobody hurt you,
I'll stand by you.
So, if you're mad get mad, don't hold it all inside,
Come on and talk to me now.
And hey, what you got to hide? I get angry too
But I'm alot like you.
When you're standing at the crossroads, don't know which path to choose,
Let me come along, cause even if your wrong
I'll stand by you, I'll stand by you, won't let nobody hurt you,
I'll stand by you.
Take me into your darkest hour, and I'll never desert you.
I'll stand by you.
And when, when the night falls on you Frankie, you're feeling all alone,
You won't be on your own, I'll stand by you. I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you, won't let nobody hurt you. I'll stand by you
Take me in into your darkest hour and I'll never desert you
I'll stand by you."

He came in halfway through the song. I had left the door open so he would hear it. I wanted to stop and just hug him when I saw his tear stained face. But some strange force of nature was telling me to keep going. Maybe it was Alba. I wasn't sure. But I did. And when I finished he sat next to me and he let me hug him. Franc was eight, and small for his age. He cried a bit more and finally said "I don't understand." I knew what he was talking about, I let him continue "It's not bad is it?"

"No, it isn't."

"So…why do they say it is?"

"I wish I knew."

Then he looked up at me and wiped his nose "And you?" he asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Do you…do you think I'm a…" I could barely hear his whispered voice "a…fag?" I have never felt so angry in my entire life. My heart burned, my brain was buzzing the blood in my veins was boiling. I didn't want to show it to him; he didn't need to see that. He needed to see that his dad loved him. So I pulled him on my lap and held his face with my hands. He was so small. "No. I don't. I think you're wonderful and perfect no matter what you do or who you choose to be. Do you understand? Don't let those kids tell you who are. Please. Don't. Okay?"

He nodded "Okay."

"Because what they say doesn't matter, what matters is how you deal with it. Okay?"

"Okay."

"Because their words can't change you. Only you can change you, right?"

"Right."

"Do what you love, because you love it. And you love it, right?"

"Right. I do. I really do."

"So what now?"

He smiles up at me "I love you, dad." I laugh.

"I love you too, squirt." I hug him tight. "Are you gonna tell me who said that to you?"

"Why?"

"Because I'm gonna kick their butts."

"DAD!"

"Fine. I'll kick their dad's butts, how's that?"

He takes a moment to think "That's sounds okay."

"Okay." I carry him to the kitchen and sit him down on the table. "Eat your food." I say gesturing to the sausages that were still warm. He ate them up, quickly and asked "Will you help me with math?"

I let out a small groan.

"PLEASE." he says.

"Okay. I'll try."

He smirks and says "Because that's all we can do, right?" It's like something tugs at my heart. That was so incredibly Alba I almost broke down. But I held my own "Right."

I miss her.

Wooh:)) I won't be able to update for awhile coz I too would like to graduate college in 4 years:))) Reviews as always, please:) I usually wait for three before making the next chapter so I can get the right feel:)

That's All:) Take Care

_cole_