Chapter 10 Lessons & Sessions
As the first days of her tutelage under the Six dragged by, Starbuck's world telescoped into surviving the 'educational experiences' the Six subjected her to. The hours suspended from the hook blurred with those spent curled around herself, trying to shutter away the building abuse. Her side was a constant agony now and breathing was getting more difficult with each successive session. Sleep was snatched in exhausted short stints as she drifted in and out on waves of pain. Food, or the slop served in its place, was slid through a slot in the bottom of the door once a day she thought.
Whenever she was physically capable, Starbuck forced herself to move and stretch, trying to keep ready for any opportunity to escape. At other times, to distract herself from the grinding pain, Kara worked on her 'wish list', something she and Helo had come up with one night during a Triad game.
It had originally started out with Helo bemoaning the last of his stash of suckers. Next thing, she and the others were listing off what food each would wish for if given one choice. She'd learned a few interesting things about her fellow pilots that night. Like, that Hotdog's favorite food didn't come from a concession stand, but was this tastebud-searing curry dish his grandmother use to stir up once a month until her death when he was sixteen. And Kat's favorite food was ice cream, chocolate mint, and she'd always wanted to open an ice cream shoppe since her first experience in one as a seven year old. The petite pilot had rambled on and on about all the different flavors and how the place had had some thirty-two total, boasting it had more than any others.
Sitting awkwardly propped against the cell wall, Kara felt a smile slide between the slats of pain squeezing her chest and flow up. She remembered mocking the younger pilot for days afterwards, suggesting different revolting flavors such as chili and cheddar, or blue cheese. Kat had been pissed. Kara's smile flickered brighter at the memory of the other woman's disgusted looks.
The wish game that night hadn't end on an up note, though.
After a few more rounds that got progressively more ridiculous, Duck had quietly said that he wished that he could be a dad so he could teach his kid how to swim just like his father had. Up until then, everyone had been talking about things they missed. Missing a future none of them were likely to ever have brought down the true weight of all they'd lost, crushing the mood, and the game had quickly broken up after that.
The memory turned bittersweet now as Kara wondered if she'd ever see any of her crewmates and friends again. Shoving the doubt aside, she focused again on composing her own 'wish list', making a point to consider every detail of each item. It wasn't enough to wish for pizza. It had to be an extra large one; thick crusted, sloppy with sauce and layered heavily with ham and pineapple. She didn't actually like pineapple, just the tangy juice flavor. She remembered late night dinners shared with Zak and how he'd been the target more than once of flying chunks of fruit as she'd deftly flicked them off with her finger.
Forcing her thoughts to count exactly how many pieces of meat it would take to entirely cover her mental meal, Kara endured through the next few minutes, then the ones that came after that, then the next...
She tried to keep track of time's passage in her constantly lit cell by the delivery of her daily meal and the lessening of the pain of wounds between each session, but it was getting successively more difficult as her existence narrowed to just enduring the next increment of present time.
When the pain from her ribs became too much to be distracted from, Kara focused on the satisfaction of the Cylon woman's growing frustration at her defiance. She had thought that the Six wouldn't let herself respond to any more goading, but it seemed to be the opposite case. The more time they spent together, the less control the skin-job seemed to have over her reactions to Starbuck's taunts. The Six obviously hadn't expected her to be so hard to break, but her tormentor's chagrin was unfortunately marked by her increasing brutality with each progressive visit.
While choking down 'dinner' on what she thought was her fourth in the cell, a bemused revelation came to Kara; since being locked in the cell, she hadn't had any more 'lost' hours. It was a mixed blessing, though, as she shoved the empty bowl aside and painfully shifted, trying to find a portion of anatomy to lay on that wasn't either bruised or bleeding. A nice blackout would've been welcomed about now. As she sought to fade back into the temporary refuge of sleep, the mocking voice of her mother whispered to her, reminding her that it was cowardice that had landed her in this mess in the first place, and Kara wished she could go back to the empty silence in her head.
Even if it did mean she'd lost her mind.