This is sort of a...consolation chapter (focuses mainly on Leo)- I simply had to get this out of my head!
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Leo wasn't surprised that he didn't sleep for very long- his mind troubled with thoughts of his youngest brother and the mystery shrouding his current situation. Too many questions and too many concerns; it was impossible to sleep for any great length of time.
So here he was awake again, sitting on the edge of his bed and staring very intently at nothing while he worked through the many questions plaguing his mind.
Who had done this? What had they to gain from it? Had they wanted anything at all, or was this simply an act of violence?
Maybe Mikey had provoked it…jumped into a situation without thinking? But that seemed more like something Raph would do. And who or what could have caused such damage to his younger brother- Mikey was a goof off sometimes, but still a trained ninja.
Was whoever responsible for this still out there? Would they be targeted again?
Leo sighed.
He realized that until his brother regained his memory, all these questions would remain unanswered- and as badly as he wanted to find who had done this, to make sure it never happened to Mikey or any of his brothers again, he knew how pointless it would be now. After all, how can you find something if you don't even know what you're looking for- how can you fight the enemy if you don't know who the enemy is?
Of course that hadn't stopped Raph from going topside for answers when this whole thing had first happened- much to Leo's annoyance. In fact, Raph and Leo had argued greatly over the matter after the first couple of days following the mystery attack. And when Mikey had not awakened after two days .…when he had stopped shifting in his sleep or making small sounds of discomfort in the back of his throat…when he became silent and still…
Leo's hands gave a nervous twitch at such thoughts, and he released a shaky breath.
When Sensei had been unable to contact Mikey…Leo knew something was terribly wrong. Donnie had soon after discovered the twin puncture wounds on Mikey's neck.
Even with the blood tests that Don performed there was no way to tell what he'd been given, or if that was even the cause for Mikey's unresponsiveness. A coma. His little brother was in a coma.
And from the desperate look on Donatello's face as he researched, ran tests, compared blood samples- and the troubled and aged look on Master splinter's face after another failed attempt at reaching their brother- Leo knew how bad the situation was. Don couldn't give them an answer as to how long this would last or if there was a way to treat Mikey…and Leo knew….he knew exactly why his brainy brother answered such question with short clipped responses such as, 'I'm working on it.'
Because Donatello didn't know. He wasn't sure if there was a way to help him. He didn't have an answer as to how long Mikey would be like this, because it would have been too hard to admit that he may never return to them at all.
For Leo it was as if he'd been sucker punched in the gut- and after the initial shock, he could only think about what more he could have done to prevent such a thing from happening. How had he let this happen? What kind of leader was he?…what kind of brother?
Mikey was alive, he was stable, and Leo took what comfort he could from that. Still, the idea that Mikey might never recovery…never awaken…it was like someone saying the sun had stopped shining; the world seemed colder, darker- not unlivable, but somehow unbearable.
For Raph, however, the realization had hit even harder. Master Splinter had once told Leo that Raphael was such a passionate person, that he felt things so strongly and without restraint, that it was difficult for him to control himself- and often such emotions were expressed negatively by his red banded brother, because he knew no other way to express himself. It was no surprise to Leo then that Raph was even more determined to discover who was responsible for their brothers condition- refusing to stop until he found them and made them pay.
Despite what his hotheaded brother may have thought, Leo really did understand where he was coming from. He wanted answers too, he wanted justice. He wanted to make sure this never happened again. Ever.
Leo, however, knew how pointless it had been at the time- how dangerous it was to be out searching when they had nothing to look for. And he felt as if he needed to stay, to be with his family- to try and be strong for them, with whatever strength he had left.
Leo hardly had any energy left over to argue with his brother- and he might not have said anything at all to Raph about leaving if not for the nagging fear that he too would be attacked. He couldn't bare the idea of another one of his brothers being taken from him like that. Still, those arguments were short and pointless- and he was only grateful that Raph brought along his shell cell and at least answered whenever he tried to call him (even if it was nearly every hour, and even if Raph's only response was an annoyed, 'I'm fine.').
Leo shook his head slightly, wondering why he was thinking these thoughts. Mikey was awake now….he had his little brother back- even if he didn't have the answers to his questions.
In fact, all he had now were different questions…different concerns. Something was wrong with Mikey, he could tell, as much as his younger brother tried to hide it. It was confusing and troubling for Leo to witness. His brother had seemed fine a first, only to suddenly start crying- apologizing for things that were in no way his fault- only to calm back down a second later. He would flinch sometimes in discomfort, but would not admit to being in pain, and then there were the sudden looks of anxiety, or how he would shy away from their questions and concerns. It wasn't like Mikey at all- his brother usually loved being fussed over, and although he would sometimes downplay how much pain he was in (sometimes by actually complaining) he was usually very honest about what injuries hurt the most, and never turned down anything that might help.
Leo honestly couldn't understand what was wrong. He had even been doubtful about Mikey's loss of memory at first- although now he was certain his brother did not recall what happened. Something was obviously bothering Mikey though, and it had hurt more than he let on when his younger brother had all but refused to talk to him.
He wondered if deep down Mikey was angry with him- after all.....he should have been there.
Suddenly Leo was torn from his musings, tensing. He couldn't quite place the feeling that had just come over him but he was instantly on his feet. Had he just heard something downstairs? Doing his best to push back the sudden panic he felt, he made his way out of his room and headed toward the den. Once he entered the living room, however, his plans changed.
"Leonardo."
Leo jerked slightly in surprise, looking over to find Master splinter sitting on the sofa cradling a cup of warm tea in his hands. His sensei had not even opened his eyes to address him, and Leo was slightly embarrassed at having been caught so off guard- he had not even noticed his Masters presence when he entered the room and had walked right past him.
"Master Splinter," He cleared his throat. "Um…what are you doing up so early? You should be resting."
Sensei allowed himself a small smile at his eldest son's words.
"If I were to get as much rest as my sons believe I need- I fear I would be conscious very little." He replied, opening his eyes to look up at him. "Is there a reason perhaps that you, yourself are not asleep?"
"I thought I heard something," Leo admitted, looking toward the infirmary door which was open and admitting a small light. "I wanted to check in on Mikey, just in case."
"Ah, yes, Michelangelo," Sensei spoke a bit quietly. "I have just recently visited with your brother myself."
"He's awake? Already?" Leo asked, frowning in concern. "Is anything wrong?"
"He tells me he was awoken by a nightmare, and has a very bad headache." Sensei informed him. "I have given him some calming tea and left him in the company of Raphael- who did well in calming your brother from his earlier distress upon awakening."
Leo frowned, his little brother had been upset and he hadn't been there for him. Again.
"I..I didn't know," he murmured, staring at the floor in shame. "I mean I should have,…I haven't slept very much, I should've-."
"Leonardo. There is no reason to feel guilt over this matter." sensei told him, not willing to listen to such talk. He nodded to the seat on the other side of the table across from him. "Please have a seat; join me."
Leo looked at the offered seat and then back to the infirmary door.
"Michelangelo will be fine, my son," he assured him. "I believe it will do him well to speak with your brother Raphael. Please sit."
Leo let out a slight sigh, knowing his sensei's words were more than just a request. He hoped that Mikey was okay, but Sensei at least seemed to believe that him being alone with Raph was important. Maybe he would be able to get Mikey to open up?
"Hai, Sensei," Leo replied walking over and taking the offered seat.
It was then he noticed that a cup had already been set out in front of him, and the pot of tea sat in the middle-still warm.
He smiled wryly, looking up at his father.
"Expecting me, sensei?" he asked, slightly amused.
"For some time now, my son," He replied, his words laced with truth but slight humor as well. "In fact, you are quite late. I suspect you spent much time in your room contemplating the events of the last few days."
Leo ducked his head sheepishly, although smiling slightly at how well his father knew him. He poured himself some tea and gave his father a polite nod.
"Thank you, Sensei."
His father nodded taking a sip from his cup before setting it down on the table in front of him. Leo then noticed, with some curiosity and confusion, that something else was sitting out on the table. A shell cell?
"Master Splinter, what..," he paused as he heard someone enter the room from the kitchen. "Donnie?"
Leo stared at his brainy brother, who had taken a few steps into the room but froze upon seeing him. In his hands he carried a steaming mug, one larger in size than sensei's tea cups, and Leo didn't need to guess what was in it. He raised an eye ridge at his brother, who offered up a shy almost guilty smile, and a slight shrug of his shoulders.
Leo could have rolled his eyes in exasperation, but settled for a slight shake of his head; unable to keep a small smile from gracing his lips.
"Ah, Donatello," Sensei said, allowing the two brothers a moment before acknowledging his second youngest sons presence. "Please sit back down."
Donnie nodded taking a seat beside his master on the couch.
Once seated he stared down into his mug before glancing up at his older brother.
"So," he said, making an effort to sound casual, "Couldn't sleep, huh?"
If it had been anyone but Donatello, Leo was sure they would have sounded smug.
"Not for lack of trying," he admitted with a small sigh. "How long have you been up?"
"Not long- I started tinkering with the shell cells when I heard Raph yell from down here, and it sounded like something broke," He glanced over at sensei, uncertain.
"And just as I have said before, Donatello, your brother is fine." Master splinter replied, sipping his tea. "You both may check in on him in awhile, but for now I think it is Raphael whom is most likely to get your brother to open up."
"I hope you're right." Leo muttered, taking a small drink of tea before placing it back on the table.
He looked up, noticing that Donatello had not even set his mug down, and was holding it protectively with both hands. Leo couldn't help but smile slightly, wondering if his brother wasn't being a bit paranoid. He knew exactly what his brother was drinking, and he knew it wasn't tea.
"You can set your cup down, Don," he replied, "I'm not going to take your coffee away this time."
Don glanced up, smiling sheepishly.
"Heh…yeah, well better safe than-"
A yell from the infirmary abruptly cut Don's sentence short- he jerked in surprise and very nearly spilled his coffee. Mikey! Leo had instantly got to his feet- with every intent of going to check on his brother.
"Leonardo."
Sensei's voice was louder than normal, an unspoken command in his tone. He met Leo's concerned and determined gaze, with a firm look of his own.
Donatello looked uncertainly from his father to his brother, having wanted to jump up himself to check on mikey- but master splinters hand had gently caught his arm( a silent message that he was to stay seated).
"Leonardo, please sit down." he told him. "Allow your brother Raphael to handle this. Have faith in him."
Leo looked as if he would argue, but reluctantly took his seat back, looking down and anxiously clenching his hands into fists.
He trusted his fathers judgment, but it was killing him to sit still and do nothing- he had never envied his brother Raphael more than he did in that moment.
He looked up as he heard his brother sit down his mug and could tell that Donatello was also not pleased with sitting on the sideline, and was looking about for something to distract himself with- fiddling with the shell cell on the table, rotating his mug but not taking another drink. Another distant yell sounded from the infirmary, making leo jump again as desperation settled into his heart- Donetello winced and bowed his head as if to bare it, and sensei closed his eyes to calm himself. Leo couldn't stand it.
"I can't sit here." He announced standing back up.
Sensei sighed. "Leonardo."
"I'm sorry master splinter," he replied meeting his fathers gaze, but not backing down. "I have to go check on him."
Without waiting for a reply he turned and headed for the infirmary. Donatello looked as if he wanted nothing more than to follow, and turned his pleading gaze toward his father.
Master Splinter closed his eyes, removing his hand from Donatello's arm, and with a sigh he gave a nod of consent.
Donatello replied with a quick but grateful 'Thank you, Sensei' and hurriedly followed after his blue banded brother.
Leo had quickly made his way across the room, his stride purposeful -full of pent up anxiety and concern for his brother-, but as he took the first few steps into the infirmary he faltered- coming to an abrupt stop at the sight before him.
Raph was half seated on the edge of the bed, his back mostly turned toward him, but not enough to hide the person in his arms; despite how much it seemed as if Mikey was trying to burry himself into his brother plastron. Raph had one arm wrapped around his brothers shell, and his other hand was placed on Mikey's head, holding him against him.
Leo barely even notice Donatello come to stop beside him, but when he did he glanced over. Don's face was at fist stunned, but it softened soon after with several different emotions. Leo thought he recognized one as guilt, and he certainly felt more than a bit ashamed of himself - as if he had just intruded on a very important and clearly private moment between his two other brothers. But mostly he felt guilty for charging in there as if he were coming to Mikey's rescue.
He felt so foolish now.
Raph cared about Mikey just as much as anyone- he should have had more faith in his brother than that. But he had wanted to check on Mikey so badly.
Leo shook his head slightly at himself, thinking of how he should have trusted his father…and his brother. Still, he couldn't bring himself to walk away from the scene before him. He felt rooted to the ground.
He tensed up a second later when he heard Raphael's whispered apology- and he certainly wasn't expecting his youngest brothers reaction to such words. He had even thought that Mikey had gone to sleep, but something about what Raph had said obviously triggered something within their brother.
He pulled away, giving his unannounced audience a clear view of his determined- if not somewhat pleading- glare. He point blank refused to hear Raph apologize and when the older of the two insisted….
"I don't care!"
Leo and Don both jolted at the sheer magnitude of his voice, and the desperation in his words.
"I fell..I dropped the phone..it was my stupid fault!"
Raph instantly protested, insisting that it was in no way his fault, but Leo doubted that Mikey even heard him. His youngest brother was franticly shaking his head.
"I should have called sooner!"
His voice was strained now, painful to hear. He sounded on the verge of tears.
"It's not your fault, or Leo's, or Don's. so just…just stop it! Stop blaming yourself!"
Leo's eyes widened and he glanced at Don again, noticing a similar look of surprise and then…understanding.
Tears were falling down Mikey's face now as he cried and struggled for a breath. His body shook with each gasp for air and his face looked flushed.
"P-please," He sobbed, a sound the broke his brother hearts. "J-just stop..I can't…I just can't-"
And in the next second he had flung himself into Raphs arms, crying still- his breathing panicky and uneven.
Don, seeing that Mikey was beginning to hyperventilate, felt a sudden jolt of panic himself. He took a step forward as if to intervene on his brother behalf but Leo caught his arm.
Don looked up at his oldest brother with concern and a sense of urgency. Mikey needed him. But Leo's gaze was serious, and he shook his head- Don understood all at once what he meant to convey just by looking him in the eyes.
'Let Raph handle it.'
Don nodded and stood back with Leo, his brothers grip on his arm was soon gone, and Leo's hand instead went to lay on his brothers shoulder. Supporting him silently.
Raph didn't disappoint- he seemed to understood what Mikey's problem was, even if Mikey hadn't realized it himself. The two brothers listened to Raphs words as he promised not to put the blame on himself, and then asked his brother to do the same.
"It wasn't yer fault either," They heard Raph say, his voice sure. "It was whatever did this to ya, understand?"
Leo frowned slightly in confusion- noticing his brother said 'whatever' instead of 'whoever'. Did he know something they didn't? Had Mikey…remembered? A glance toward Donatello told him that his brother had also noticed the oddity of what Raph had said.
Mikey's reply was too quiet for them to hear but Raphs response told them all they needed to know. Leo and Don both felt immense relief seeing that Mikey had calmed down, leaning heavily against his older brother as Raph massaged the back of his neck. A few moments later Mikey whispered something else to Raph that neither of the two could make out, but Raph gently shook his head.
"Might have at get a second opinion on that, bro." he replied, turning his head to the side as if directing his words at someone other than michelangelo.
Leo and Don both stiffened slightly, wondering how long their brother had noticed their presence- but Raph didn't comment further, and simply turned his attention back to the brother in his arms.
Leo thought it was odd that his brother didn't seem all that upset with them, and he couldn't help but feel as if he had missed something important.
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I had intended to start the chapter with Raph laying Mikey back to sleep and then Leo and Don announcing their prescence from behind- but it kind of irked me to just have then suddenly 'appear'. Then I got all caught up in Leo's frame of mind (which is wierd- I never thought I'd be able to write for him but it seemed effortless)---anyway, I had to do this or else I'd never be able to get on with the story.
I do apologize however- I know it seems as if I'm delaying things (although, I kind of am, heh). I've been so scatter brained lately (my entire life, that is)- I'll try to pull things together.
Please review- but try not to be harsh.