The Twilight Twenty-Five
Prompt: FRAGMENTS
Pen name: SWEETP-1
Pairing: EDWARDxBELLA
Rating: M

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight - I am just borrowing quotes and characters (direct quotes in italics). No copyright infringement intended.

Bella is 36.

The door closed behind her.

Edward felt himself crumpling to the floor, free-falling like his spine had been ripped from his body, his granite-like strength seeping from his bones and staining the floor with invisible blood.

A strange keening noise he didn't recognize erupted from his chest, filling the air with the sound of pain and despair.

She was gone.

"You are my life. You're the only thing it would hurt me to lose."

"I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right here as long as you need me."

"This isn't a normal existence, or the human life you wanted for me, Edward. It's some twisted, warped fairy-tale, where instead of a happily-ever-after, I'm damned to spend every day inching closer to death, and you're forced to watch me slowly erode away."

Bella couldn't stand still, and she paced the floor restlessly, as if the constant movement might ease the pain that was constricting her chest.

"I've already told you, Bella. We can make this work. I know we can. Please! " Edward pleaded, watching her from his seat on the couch. A tangled ball of emotions vibrated through every sinew in his body, threatening to explode and obliterate; a time-bomb of anguish poised to destroy them both.

"No, I don't think we can, not anymore. You were right. I need to live a human life. This life you live, it isn't real. You can have anything your heart desires. It's effortless and..."

Edward interrupted her, leaping swiftly to his feet.

"You think my life is effortless? You think that I don't struggle with the same emotions and challenges that you do? You think that I don't wrestle to keep myself under control, every day? Do you realize how much effort it takes to keep myself from hurting you? From killing you? You think that's effortless?" Edward seethed.

"Exactly, Edward. How can you want to spend the rest of my life fighting that - every. single. day? It shouldn't be that hard, just to be together."

Because I love you, Bella. Edward wanted to scream the words at her, but instead he turned and stalked out of the room. He slammed the door behind him.

The sound of cracking timber ripped through the deafening silence.

Bella knew she was speaking, but the voice didn't sound like her own. It was empty, emotionless, the words echoing in her heart.

"I'm not strong enough, Edward. I can't do this anymore."

"Do you want me to lie to you, and tell you everything is fine? That I think things can go back to the way they were? The truth may be ugly, but a lie would be worse. For both of us," Bella sobbed. "This..." she waved her hand haphazardly in the space between them, "this isn't enough anymore."

"Bella...please don't say that."

Edward wrapped her in his arms. The strength of his arms around her was usually a comforting, safe haven. Now, his cool, iron-like embrace was suffocating her.

"You promised me. You promised me a forever, an eternity. And I was so young and naive, I actually believed you."

"That promise still stands, Bella. Whatever happens now, I will always love you, forever."

"I know, but what I failed to realize then, was that your eternity and my eternity are two different things. You promised me something you couldn't give me."

"You know why I couldn't change you. I thought you understood that? " Edward sighed.

"Yes, but you can't give me the alternative, either. I'm trapped in this torture, this limbo, unable to have a human life with you, and unable to have you forever. Where does that leave me?"

"With me; here, now," Edward replied.

Once upon a time, that would have been enough.

He held her by the wrist, clinging, begging. He knew it was tight, too tight, his desperation-laced grip would bruise her, maybe even break her.

But he couldn't let go.

"Please don't leave me."

Bella sat on the edge of her bed, waiting. Just as she knew it would, her phone suddenly sparked to life, vibrating and glowing in her hand.

"Hi, Alice," Bella said, without looking at the display.

"I'm so sorry, Bella," Alice said softly.

"Please don't tell me, okay? Don't tell me if this is the right, or the wrong, decision. I don't want to know. I just...need to...go... and make my own way, whatever happens. Okay? I know you can see, just...I can't know," Bella struggled to hold back the tears as she begged Alice.

"Of course, whatever you want," Alice replied sadly.

"I'll miss you, Alice. You're my best friend, and it feels like I'm losing you too."

"We'll still be friends, Bella. I promise." Bella took strength in Alice's reassurances, but deep down, she knew nothing was ever going to be the same.

It had been a long time since she could remember being scared. There is little to fear when you have an impossibly strong, unbreakable immortal by your side.

Now she was completely and utterly alone.

And she was terrified.

"You're leaving because I can't give you children." Edward couldn't read her thoughts, but there was no mistaking the look of pain and longing that flashed across her face when she saw a baby.

"It's part of it. I'm sorry. I just can't help feeling like I'm meant to be a mother. I tried for so long to push it down and ignore it, but it just never goes away."

"We could adopt, or something. There are ways, Bella." Edward knew he sounded desperate, and for a split-second he convinced himself that a baby would be the answer. If it would fix it, he would do it. He would do anything.

"I'd do it if that's what you wanted, Bella."

Bella laughed, but it was laced with pain, not humor. "Jesus, Edward. We both know you're a masochist, but really? That's a bit much, even for you." She shook her head as she considered the myriad of secrets and lies that would swaddle any child of theirs, however it came into the world. An image of Edward holding a baby in his arms flashed through her head; a child raising a child. At least, that's how it would look. Another image chased away the doting father, and Bella swallowed back her tears as she imagined Edward standing over the grave of his own child.

"You don't love me anymore, is that it? Please, just tell me."

Bella tried not to look in Edward's eyes, afraid of what she would see there.

"Of course, I still love you. I think I always will, Edward. I think, maybe, the problem is that I love you too much. And, if you really loved me, you'd let me go."

"I don't know how, Bella."

"You are the only one who has ever touched my heart. It will always be yours."

The white-on-white hotel room was plush and lavishly decorated, but for once Bella didn't see the expensive furnishings, the carefully themed accents, the fresh white roses on the buffet. To her, the room was cold and clinical; it wasn't home.

Her limbs were numb, heavy, and they seemed to propel her forward on their own accord. All purposeful thought had long fled. She dropped her bags in a heap on the floor, shedding her clothes as she stumbled to the bathroom.

She turned her back on the mirror, not wanting to see what havoc the day's destruction had wreaked on her face, and turned the shower on.

The water was so hot it stung, but she welcomed the pain. As each scorching droplet hit her skin, she imagined it burning a hole in her flesh, atonement for her sins and the devastation she had caused. If only it would wash away the agony and fill the void in her chest where her heart once beat.

She slumped to the tiled floor, holding her knees tight to her chest as the grief consumed her. Muffled sobs wracked her body as hot tears streamed down her face.

Tiny fragments of her heart, splashing to the floor before dissolving and disappearing.

A/N:
Sarah McLachlan and her beautiful song "Do What You Have To Do" put me in a sufficiently emo mood to write this one. It's my favourite chapter so far.

Betham and Vanpirenz - thank you both. I couldn't ask for a better beta team.