A/N: Wow.. 10th chapter...

I am so, so sorry for the long wait. The past month I have been busy with goliath amounts of schoolwork, a few medical issues, my grandmother visiting, and attempting to make time to see my friends. Not to mention the fact that I haven't exactly been in the mood to write. If I did write well, Nudge would have rejected Gazzy, Gazzy would have killed himself, and Iggy would have died in a car accident. Not exactly fun...

Chapter 10: Notes

Nudge POV

"Dear Monique," I read aloud from the letter that I had found on my bed about an hour ago.

"First off, I want you to know that I love you. Just not the kind of love we both thought it was in the beginning. Well, that you thought it was… I know that this news will crush you, which is why I cannot tell you in person. I couldn't bare to see you hurt because of me. Here goes nothing.

"I am leaving you, Monique, darling. But I have my reasons, and I know that you will rebound soon. How can you not? You dress fabulously and you could be a model.

"Back to the point. Here's the thing: there was always something wrong with out relationship. We aren't meant to be together. We're more… friends than lovers. But I knew there was a reason for meeting you, even if it wasn't because we were supposed to be together. The reason was Jeffery.

"If it weren't for Jeffery, I wouldn't be writing this letter right now. Only he could give me the courage to be myself, and so fate (and you) brought me to him. I'm sorry if I've led you on, but this is the way it has to be.

"Why? I'm leaving you, Monique. Leaving you to pursue the real love of my life, Neil Patrick Harris. That's right. I'm gay.

Thank you, Monique. You and your wonderful friends have helped me learn to accept myself for who I am. I actually gained the courage to tell my grandfather tonight too. Though, I'm not sure he was paying attention. He might've been distracted by the girl he was sucking face with…

"Again, I'm sorry for leading you on but it's obvious you never loved me. You have always been in love with Zephyr. Rightfully so, too. He is very easy on the eyes. If he were gay… Never mind. He's yours, Monique. I know what happened earlier tonight. Go find him. You'll regret it if you don't.

Much love,

Your ex-boyfriend Fredrick Humperdinck

P.S. I expect an invitation to the wedding."

"What the hell is this?" Fang asked in confusion. Well, as confused as Fang can show. "Let me see it," He looked as though he wanted to say more, but instead just shook his head slightly, reading the letter over again.

"Is it true?" Max asked eyes boring into me like lasers. She could be scary without meaning to sometimes.

"Is what true?" I decided to play dumb, but internally knew it would never work. "If you're asking me if Fredrick is gay, I think the answer is obviously yes." Max gave me another death glare, not needing to say what she meant. It was time to suck it up and admit it to someone other than myself. "Okay, I know what you're asking. Yeah, I guess I am in love with Gazzy."

It felt… strange to say that out loud. Strange, but well, relieving. No longer would I have to hide my thoughts from Angel, explain my constant mumbling to Ella. It was out in the open, and no matter how scared I was, I knew that this would be for the better.

Max took in a deep breath, her face expressionless. Fang was also unreadable, but that wasn't very uncommon for Fang. Neither spoke, which worried me. They made it impossible to tell what they were thinking, and to be honest I was petrified of their reactions.

"Okay," She sighed, and I couldn't tell if she was unhappy or just shocked. I hoped for the latter. "Now what happened earlier tonight? Don't even think about trying to skirt around this."

Oh crap, I had to tell her. I didn't even want to say it out loud. "Umm, he well," I sighed. Ella was going to be pissed if I didn't tell her first, so I quickly called her, put it on speaker and started talking as soon as she picked up. "Hi, Ella, don't kill me for not telling you earlier, but shut up and listen."

"What the hell, Nudge? Did you-" Being the wonderful best friend I am, I cut her off.

"Well, tonight at dinner, Gazzy brought this date and I got all jealous, but then she turned out to be lesbian and Iggy gave this speech and it was all so inspirational and then there was this pie and I knew I had to tell Gazzy how I feel so I tried to, but then I tripped and he kissed me!" I said all of this in one breath and would be shocked if they understood any of it. "Then he flew off and I had to go in there and act like I was on love with Fredrick. It was hell. Hell, I say! Oh, but it's okay, Ella. Fredrick's gay. He left me a weird letter saying he's off to pursue Neil Patrick Harris."

There were a few moments of silence before Elle spoke up. "I am officially confused. How do you feel about Gazzy exactly? And why was Iggy giving an inspirational speech?"

"I-I think I'm in love with him, Ella," I admitted. She squealed as expected. "Oh, and Iggy's speech was quite fantastic. I think I'll be calling everyone 'Guppy' for at least a month though."

Max stood next to me, looking slightly shocked. "Well, hasn't this been an eventful day. Have you talked to Gazzy?"

"No," I said, my shuffling feet suddenly becoming quite interesting. "He wasn't at his apartment and he isn't answering the phone. Iggy wasn't able to reach him either."

"You need to talk to him," Max said, as though the idea had just come to her. "Do you have any idea where he could be?"

"Actually," I said, thinking back a few months. "I think I might."

Gazzy POV:

Ihave no idea what brought me there, all I knew was that there was only one place on the world in my mind and I needed it. Honestly, if I had been in my right mind, it was probably the last place on Earth I would have chosen, but something told me it was necessary. All that mattered was the fact that I was by the ocean, the air was fresh, and I could get everything out of my mind. I didn't have to think about her.

Well, I had hoped I wouldn't have to think about her.

Truth be told, she was the only thing on my mind. I had missed dozens of calls from her, Fredrick, and Iggy. There was no way I was going to answer though; I didn't need to be yelled at. I already hated myself without getting screamed at by Nudge.

Nudge. I winced at the thought of what had happened at dinner.

How could I be so thoughtless? There was no way she could ever feel the way I did, and I have no idea what possessed me. What kind of person kisses the girl who you've been raised with that just sees you as a little brother? Apparently me. She would never feel the same way, and I know that. So why would I be such an idiot? My subconscious must have had a reason. Haha, as if. I was just not thinking. If I gave myself 10 more seconds to think, I could have avoided this entire situation. But no. I had to be my rash, senseless self.

Stupid, stupid Gazzy. I grabbed a small rock and threw it off the cliff I was standing on into the ocean below. My phone rang again, and I contemplated throwing it into the ocean as well. I checked caller ID, figuring it would be Nudge, and saw a name I would never have expected.

Fang.

Although I was not in the mood to talk, there was no way I was going to miss this call. Fang never called anyone other than Max, which was uncommon anyways as they were practically attached at the hip. If he wanted a flock member to know something, he would tell Max to call. We were just used to not talking to Fang by now.

So, despite how much I wanted to not think about the flock at that moment, I picked up the phone.

"Hello," I said, anxious to discover what the call was about. "Is everyone okay?"

"Is everyone okay?" Fang practically growled. I was honestly shocked. Rarely ever did Fang speak with any emotion. Only when he was really pissed could you actually tell how he felt. I'm guessing he was really pissed. "What the hell is wrong with you, Gazzy? Do you have any idea what Nudge is going through right now?"

Oh. I should've known that Nudge had told Fang. There were few things Nudge didn't tell Fang. It had been that was ever since they had gotten separated from Max all those years ago in the cave. They had a strange bond, different from that any other flock members shared. I never understood it, and asked her about it once, but she just shrugged. Probably just one of those things I would never understand.

"I could probably guess. Disgust because of a stupid mistake I made? You don't need to tell me about how much she hates me, I already got that figured out."

"Damn it, Gazzy. Will you ever see past your nose? You just don't get it do you?" See past my nose? What the hell did that mean? Before I could think, I had hung up the phone.

Damn it, what had I done? Now I not only had Nudge mad at me, but Fang too. Which means that Max is probably pissed as well. Curse my talent for screwing things up.

As I looked up into the sky, I wondered how long I had been here. It must've been almost all night because the sun was beginning to rise. In a few hours or so, people would show up and I would have most likely passed out. Which is probably why I decided to look for a hotel or something to stay at.

After a few minutes, I found something that looked like a hotel, not even bothering to check the name or anything. I was too tired to care at this point.

"What can I do for you?" The elderly woman at the front desk spoke in an abnormally perky tone for 6 o'clock in the morning.

"I need a room as soon as possible," I said, handing her a credit card. "I don't care how crappy the room it, I just need one."

"Of course, sweetie," She said with a smile. "Here's your room key. A-16. Down the hall on your left. Enjoy your stay!"

I plastered on a smile in return, thanked her and walked down the hall, collapsing as soon as I saw the bed.

A few hours later, I woke up due to the fact that something had just landed on my face. A bird. And not just any bird either.

"Baconette? What the hell?" Stating that I was confused would be the understatement of the century. I looked around the room, but no one was there. To be honest, I was slightly terrified. Baconette kept pecking at me with her beak, and it was then that I noticed the note wrapped around her foot.

Meet me at the wharf in 30 minutes for lunch. We need to talk. Don't even think about avoiding me. I know where you are. –N

Nudge. I didn't want to talk to Nudge. Talking would lead to yelling and no one likes yelling. I knew I was an idiot, did she really need to tell me that?

Think of the flock, stupid.

Damn conscience. Better get ready for lunch then.

A/N 2: Holy crap! This story actually was going to just be a one-shot, so I am extremely shocked to have just written the tenth chapter.

First of all, I want to thank ClassyIsMyMiddleName and Callmemrsblack for being the best people alive :) You two have provided me with tons of support and Cheez-Itz and love and inspiration and Beauty and the Beast and awkward Dalton conversations (Classy...) and I love you for it. Oh, and for naming most of my chapters, dear Classy! Thanks sooo much!

Second, a shout out to my amazing class mates for being insane enough to provide me with the willpower to write. You just say the most insane things... "Let me see it, Captain HORRRRster" Oh, gosh...

And last, but not least! (Probably most, actually!) Thank you to everyone who actually reads this! Thanks for putting up with my non-updatedness, my insanities, and all my typo's. :) I love each and every one of you for it!

Much love,

a happy FutureGingerQueen