Nice long chapter to make up for the short last one :) Only one more chapter after this one, unfortunately. Keep reviewing, please :)
Sam's POV
Freddie's alarm went off as always the next morning, and I expected him to turn it off and give me a few more minutes sleep like he usually did, but the alarm just kept going. I opened my eyes groggily and yawned. I was sleeping on my side, facing Freddie's bed, but it was empty. I wondered vaguely where he was, and then I grabbed the phone and turned off the alarm before I went insane. I was putting the phone on the bedside table when I froze. I knew where Freddie was. Now that the alarm was off and I could think clearly, I noticed the weight of the arm draped over my waist. I noticed the warm body against my back, pressing into me with every inhalation. I noticed the calf that my foot was resting on. What the hell? I thought. I remembered the night before, the nightmare, how Freddie had come to comfort me. But why was he sleeping in my bed? The last thing I remembered was lying down, trying to go back to sleep, with Freddie stroking my hair. Ah I thought. He must've fallen asleep before he got back into his own bed. I knew that it should upset me that I woke up to find the dork spooning me, but it didn't. I kind of liked it, to be honest. But Freddie could never ever know that. I had to get out of bed before he woke up and found us like this, or things between us would get unbearably awkward. As I was debating how best to get up, I felt Freddie move. Crap, he's awake I thought. But he just rolled over onto his back, lifting his arm off my waist. I shivered as the cold air conditioning hit the newly exposed skin on my back where Freddie had been pressed a moment ago. Fortunately, this made it really easy to get out of bed without waking Freddie up, and I gingerly got to my feet, grabbing some clothes and tiptoeing into the bathroom. When I came out, I found Freddie packing the bags. He straightened when he heard the door open.
"Hey" he said. "How did you get up before me?"
"I have no idea" I said. Freddie either didn't notice that he woke up in my bed, or he chose not to acknowledge it. Either way, it worked for me. He zipped up the last bag and grabbed a pile of clothes that he had put on the bed. While he showered, I thought about how best to handle this situation. Should I thank him, or would that make things awkward? Should I pretend nothing happened, or would he get offended? I still wasn't sure why he hadn't told me what had happened on the night of the 4th of July. My memory did indeed become clearer as the day progressed, and what had happened between me and Freddie had come back all at once, crystal clear. Why didn't he tell me? Was he embarrassed? Was he relieved that I had forgotten because he didn't like me, and he figured that he had dodged a bullet? Or did he think that I only did what I did because I was drunk, and I don't feel the same way sober? Truthfully, that theory was half true – I did only do what I did because I was drunk, but it was because the alcohol gave me the courage to do what I was too scared to do sober. I knew which answer was the right one – Freddie and I liked each other. It was official. There was no more denying it, or beating around the bush. Not after the events of the past few nights. I knew that Freddie would be too scared to say anything, so I had to take matters into my own hands. I shuddered at the thought of making myself so vulnerable. I spent my life building a shell that was so impenetrable, so tough, that I gave the impression that nothing could touch me. I wasn't used to being vulnerable. Freddie came out of the bathroom and we set out. We ate breakfast at a diner before heading out onto the road. Tonight was our last night before reaching Providence, so I had to do it by tonight. I spent the majority of the day thinking about what I would do or say, and I came up with a million possibilities, but they were all wrong. I spent hours thinking about it, yet when we pulled into the final hick town, I had no idea what I was going to say. We ate dinner and I tried not to let my nerves show, although I had been nervous all day.
"Hey Freddie?" I said at the dinner table.
"Yeah?"
"About last night…" I began. I saw him tense up slightly. "Thanks"
He relaxed. "No problem"
He seemed to know that I still didn't want to talk about it, and he dropped it. That was one thing I liked about Freddie, he always knew when you wanted to talk and when you didn't.
After dinner we returned to our motel room. With every passing hour I grew more nervous, knowing that I had less time to procrastinate. I went to have a shower after Freddie, hoping it would calm me down, but it didn't. I came out of the bathroom to see Freddie sitting on one of the beds with his guitar. He glanced up briefly when he heard the door open, but he kept playing. He was playing one of my favourite songs, and I sat on the other bed, listening as he sang.
I've been beaten down, I've been kicked around
But she takes it all for me
And I lost my faith in my darkest days
But she makes me want to believe
They call her love, love, love, love, love
They call her love, love, love, love, love
She is love, and she's all I need
She's all I need
As he sang the last line he looked up, straight into my eyes, like he was singing to me. Suddenly I interrupted him.
"Could you teach me this song?"
"Teach you?"
"Yeah. Teach me to play it. I love this song"
"Uh, yeah. Sure. Come here"
I went and sat next to Freddie on his bed, and he handed over the guitar.
"Okay, for the first bit, put one finger here, one here, and one here" he said, placing my fingers on the strings as he spoke. "Then pick these strings like this" he demonstrated and I copied.
"Right. Next, put one finger… hold on" he said. He edged around until he was behind me, and he put his fingers on the strings, playing the first two notes.
"Right, okay" he said, leaning back. "Sorry, this is easier when it's like I'm holding the guitar"
I had an idea. "Would this make it easier?" I asked, getting up and planting myself in his lap.
"Um…yeah. Yes it would" he answered, getting over the shock and composing himself. He taught me the guitar up to the chorus where I had interrupted him, showing me the notes and how to strum. His chin rested on my shoulder and I could feel his breath warm on my skin. Then he started showing me how the singing went with it.
"So it goes like this" he said. He played the intro and then stopped, his fingers still holding down the strings.
"This is where you start to sing" he told me, plucking the strings.
I've been beaten down he sang. "By you" he muttered under his breath, grinning at me.
"Then you change it to this one" he said, moving his fingers.
I've been kicked around he continued. "Also by you" he added on.
But she takes it all for me.
And I lost my faith he continued slowly, showing me how and when the notes changed.
In my darkest days he sang, looking across at me. I turned my head and he gazed directly into my eyes. Looking into Freddie's eyes was like swimming in pools of yummy, warm, melted chocolate. Or gravy. Yeah, gravy.
But you make me want to believe he sang softly into my ear, taking some creative liberties with the lyrics and sending shivers down my spine.
They call her love, love, love, love, love
They call her love, love, love, love, love
She is love, and she is all I need
You're all I need he sang to me in a whisper, bending his head forward so that his nose was resting on the side of my face. I could feel his warm breath on my cheek. It smelt minty, like toothpaste. He very gently kissed my cheek, letting his lips linger. He let go of the neck of the guitar and I took his hand in mine, twining our fingers together. I twisted my neck and turned my head to face him and he kissed me ever so slightly, as if to tease me. I was having none of that, and I leaned forward, kissing him back. His lips were warm, and soft, and gentle, and I could smell his Freddie smell and this was heaven. He broke the kiss and pulled his head back slightly. My neck was beginning to hurt from being arched to the side, so I straightened it, looking at my lap. Freddie very gently kissed my temple, and then began laying a trail of soft, tiny kisses from my temple down my jawbone and neck, and onto my shoulder. I leaned my head back, resting it on his shoulder and sighing contentedly. I put the guitar aside and got up, turning around to face Freddie so that I was kneeling in front of him. I kissed him again, leaning forward into the kiss and putting my arms around his neck. He slipped his arms around my waist and drew me closer, pressing our bodies together. I played with the hair at the nape of his neck, feeling him shiver slightly. I reluctantly broke the kiss and leaned back as far as Freddie's firm grip on my waist would allow, looking at him. Suddenly, I felt laughter bubbling up inside me and I lurched forward, hugging Freddie tightly and laughing in sheer joy. He hugged me back, tightening his grip on my waist and laughing along with me. I pulled away and sat back, exhilarated and indescribably happy.
"Let's go somewhere" I said, sitting forward in excitement.
"Now?" Freddie asked, confused. "Where? And why?"
"Yes now. I don't care. And because I'm too excited to sleep" I answered his questions, hugging my knees to my chest. "Come on, let's go!"
Freddie shrugged and got up, and I excitedly leaped to my feet, completely forgetting that we were wearing pajamas. Freddie turned back and grabbed his camera, and as an afterthought put something else in his pocket. I bounded out the door and waited for Freddie to shut the door behind him, bouncing impatiently. I grabbed his hand and ran down the hallway, pulling him behind me. We took the elevator, Freddie backing me into a wall and kissing me as soon as the doors closed. When they opened we ran through the reception area hand in hand, too elated to notice the tuts and reproaching looks that we got. We burst into the parking lot and I stopped, looking up. The night was clear and the sky was filled with stars, twinkling happily above us. We walked hand in hand down the street, him in gray sweatpants and a T-shirt and me in plaid pajama pants and a tank top, looking for somewhere to go. We found ourselves in the same park we spent the night of the Fourth of July in, but on the other end. We were walking on the narrow path when I spotted something in the distance. It was a playground, I realized excitedly. I ran over, totally psyched, and immediately began climbing on the monkey bars. Freddie followed and laughed when he saw me hanging upside down on the monkey bars, waiting on him. He took out his camera and began snapping pictures of me all over the playground equipment – on the monkey bars, swinging on the swings, going down the slide. Finally I walked over and snatched the camera from him.
"Your turn" I said, snapping a picture of him. He began chasing me, ordering me to give him back his camera, then pleading with me to give me back his camera. I just darted away, snapping pictures over my shoulder. Finally he gave up and sat down heavily on the grass, panting.
"Fine. I give up" he said, holding up his hands in defeat. "Just please don't break it"
"I won't" I said, snapping another picture. "I just wanna take pictures"
"Then take this" he said, pulling something out of his pocket and throwing it to me. I automatically caught it, and then inspected it. It was a waterproof disposable camera.
"Where the hell did you get this?" I asked in confusion, sitting next to him.
"Some girl gave it to me outside the motel that night it rained" he said, shrugging. "And she ran away before I could give it back"
"Weird" I said. I checked to make sure there were still pictures on it, and then I gave Freddie back his camera.
"Smile" I said, snapping a picture. He smiled, and then pointed his camera at me.
"Your turn" he said. "Smile"
I smiled at the camera, and then leaned against his side, bringing my head close to his.
"Now we both smile" I said, holding out my arm in front of me and pointing the camera at us. I smiled and Freddie kissed my cheek, and I snapped the picture.
"Enough of this now" I said, putting the camera down before snatching Freddie's and putting it next to the disposable one. "Now we have fun"
I hopped to my feet and pulled him up, dragging him by the hand to the monkey bars. We climbed and played around, hanging upside down and swinging. I had an idea. When we were in first grade, I was the only person who would hang upside down on the monkey bars – everybody else was too scared. It was picture day at school, and we were all lined up outside in the playground to take our pictures. I was behind Freddie in the line, which passed next to the monkey bars. I decided that waiting on the ground was too boring, so I climbed up and hung upside down, still in my spot in line.
"Sam, what are you doing?" Freddie had whispered.
"I'm bored" I answered. "Why don't you come up here with me? Or are you too scared?" I mocked.
"I'm not scared" Freddie said defiantly, and he awkwardly climbed up and hung upside down next to me, the panic visible in his eyes. We hung there until a teacher yelled at us to get down, but not before the photographer had snapped a secret picture of us. It was really quite a funny picture, a few kids on either side of us standing, waiting in line, then me and Freddie upside down on the monkey bars, still in our spots in line. I loved that picture – I thought it was hilarious. Especially the terrified expression on Freddie's face. I actually had it framed, sitting on my desk at home. I hid it every time Freddie came over, not wanting him to know that I had a picture of us framed on my desk, but I figured that now was the perfect time to update it.
"Does your camera have a timer?" I asked Freddie. He nodded.
"How long?"
"The longest is twenty seconds, why?"
"How do you set it?"
He told me how and I hopped off the monkey bars, walking over to the cameras.
"Sam, what are you doing?"
"Hang upside down"
"Sam-"
"Just do it"
He shrugged and hung upside down on the monkey bars, his knees hooked over the bar. I turned on the timer on his camera and set it on the swing, checking to make sure that Freddie was in the picture. I pushed the button and a light began flashing, telling me that I had twenty seconds to get in front of the camera. I ran over to the monkey bars and quickly clambered up, hanging upside down next to Freddie.
"Remember the picture of us from first grade?" I whispered to him. He chuckled under his breath, nodding.
"I have it framed on my desk, but I think it needs to be updated"
He looked at me in surprise, then turned his head and kissed me. I vaguely saw the camera flash, but I barely noticed. We hung there, kissing, long after the picture had been taken. Eventually my head began to hurt, so I broke the kiss and righted myself, landing with a soft thump on the sand below us. I heard Freddie do the same behind me, but I was already on my way over to where I had dropped the disposable camera. I picked it up and walked over to where Freddie was standing, putting the lens cap on his camera.
"I'm tired" I announced. He nodded in agreement and held out his hand. I took it gladly, twining our fingers together, and we walked back to the motel. As soon as we got back to the motel room I collapsed on my bed on my stomach, spreading myself across the mattress. Freddie turned off the light, so that the only light in the room came from the bedside lamp, and walked over.
"Night, Sam"
I turned over onto my back and sat up. Freddie was sitting down on his bed, and I caught his eye.
"What, no goodnight kiss?"
He smirked at me, then got up and walked over to my bed, bending down and kissing me soundly. He pulled away far too soon, and got into bed, turning off the light and plunging the room into darkness.
"Night Freddie"