A/N: Chapter 10. Kames time. This is the moment you've all been waiting for. This is the turning point. This chapter decides the fate of not only the story but about James' life and the future of Big Time Rush. And you are all at the mercy of my clearly demented muse. :) Anyways, Chapter 10 for y'all. And my friend mentioned this to me the other day when I had her read this story that James' room number is 143 which is the numerical value of 'I love you'. Just thought I share that lil tidbit with ya. ok, im done blabbing. You can read peacefully now :)
Kendall walked into James' room holding back the tears. It was so hard for Kendall to see one of his brothers in that much pain. James had always been so cheerful, so lively. He had small qualities of all of them. He had the energy of Carlos, the drive of Logan and the heart of Kendall. He had their best qualities and his own model looks. He was the perfect person, inside and out.
Kendall grabbed the chair and pulled it up to James' side. He instinctively placed a hand on James' forehead and smiled as he felt the pulse in the pretty boys' temple. That meant he was still alive, he was still fighting back. Kendall leaned in and rested his head on James' shoulder, his blond hair falling gently across James' neck and his own face, masking the tears that were now soaking through James' shirt.
"I'll always remember the promise we made to each other when we were 5," he whispered, nuzzling his best friends' neck.
Flashback Time
Kendall Knight was five years old and starting school for the first time. He was terrified of starting, but not because it meant being on his own. He was afraid of leaving his mother and new baby sister, Katie, home alone with his father. Kendall didn't understand why his daddy was always so angry at them. His daddy would yell and scream and hit him for no reason, blaming him for things that Kendall didn't even do.
Kendall walked towards the door, tugging the sleeves of his hoodie down to cover the bruises on his wrists. He made a quick check of his clothes to make sure he was hiding all the bruises. He took a deep breath and walked into the room. He was shivering slightly because he had to walk to school. He strod inside the doorway, looking lost and lonely. He was still standing there when another young boy walked over to him.
"Hi. I'm James. James Diamond. You have a cool shirt." Kendall looked eye to eye with a little brunet who looked like he could be a model already. He had long, soft hair and bright hazel eyes. Kendall's emerald eyes lit up.
"Thanks. I'm Kendall, Kendall Knight." James smiled. "Wanna go play?" Kendall grinned and nodded before the two of them ran off the play with the monster trucks.
Weeks passed and the two young boys became almost inseparable. Then, Kendall's worst fear came true. It was unusually hot for late September and Kendall was sweating in his hoodie. He wanted to take it off, but he just couldn't. Last night the beating was one of the worst Kendall had ever dealt with. The bruises covered almost every inch of his pale skin and he couldn't risk anybody finding out.
"Kendall, dude, you don't look so good. You should take off the sweatshirt'" James said, concern dripping from his words. Kendall shook his head, sweat beading off of his hair. "I'm fine."
James looked at the blond's flushed face and frowned. "I'll tell the teacher."
Kendall's face paled. "Fine." He sighed and began to pull off his sweatshirt. As he did so, his shirt rode up, exposing his vast collection of bruises. It was James's turn to go pale. "Kendall...what happened to you?"
Kendall turned to him, tears in his eyes. "My...my dad. He...he beats me sometimes. He hits my mommy sometimes, too. That's why I've never invited you over. I didn't want you getting hurt. Please, promise me you won't tell. Promise me, Jamie!" the young blond was practically begging James for secrecy and his tears were flowing fast down his face. The taller boy cradled the broken boy to his chest.
"Kendall Knight, I promise that from now on I will do anything to keep you safe. IWILLtake this secret to the grave, and I will always protect you."
Kendall looked up into the warm hazel eyes. "Forever?" James smiled down at him. "Forever and ever."
Kendall smiled and pressed himself into James' chest. "And I will always protect you and keep you safe, no matter what happens."
End Flashback
Kendall had moved and was now lying over James' chest in an almost protective fashion. It was like he was trying to shield James from the hospital. Then, without any warning to James or to himself, he leaned up and planted a feather light kiss on James' pale lips. Even sick and lying in a hospital bed, James still tasted like cherry Chapstick.
Kendall pulled away, embarrassed about what he just did. He had liked James for months now, but was always too scared to act on his feelings. Seeing his friend helpless in a hospital bed seemed like the best time to come out (pun intended) and say it.
"James, buddy, I know that you probably can't hear me but I love you. Not just as my brother, but in a romantic way. James, I love you and I know you won't feel the same way but I had to tell you. You can hate me all you want, you can never talk to me again if that will make you happy. Just, please don't give up on fighting this. You have to live, not just for me, but for everyone. Logan, Carlos, Katie, mom and all of our Rushers. Even if you don't want to live for me, live for them."
Kendall placed his face down and sobbed, fingers intertwined with James'. He couldn't stand the thought of James dying here, in this bed. He needed James to live, even if he did hate him. He heard movement in the room and looked up to see who was there. He was surprised to find nobody there. "Great, now I'm hearing things."
He heard it again. He stood up and walked over to the window, trying to see if there was something outside that could be making the sounds he was convinced were in his imagination.
"I...l-love...you...too." Kendall whipped around, not believing what he heard. He rushed back to James. "James, James can you hear me? or am I going insane?" Kendall was sure he just heard James talk. Or he thought it was just his own mind, telling him exactly what he wanted to hear. Kendall stared at James. "Come on, Jamie. Talk to me again."
Kendall sat there for what felt like hours, waiting for James to talk. He was starting to give up hope when he felt James squeeze his hand. "I...love...you." Kendall knew he wasn't going crazy this time. He smiled from ear to ear and looked at James' face. James opened his eyes slowly and blinked in the bright lights.
"Oh my God, James you're alive!" Kendall practically screamed and threw his arms around James and hugged him. "Wa..water," James croaked and Kendall quickly poured a small amount and slowly poured it into his mouth. James smiled and coughed a little to clear his throat. "Dude, are you ok? You look like a mess."
Kendall smiled. "I am, dude. We are all a little messed up." James frowned. "What exactly happened? Last thing I can clearly remember is watching the headlights coming towards us and throwing myself over Carlos to shield him." Kendall launched into the story, telling him every single detail of what had happened since the impact. By the time he finished, James was in tears.
"I'm so sorry, dude. I can't even begin to imagine what has been going through your thoughts these last two or three weeks or whatever. I feel like I've been sleeping. But all this stuff is wrong with me? Really? Am I going to live?"
Kendall smiled. "Three hours ago, we were convinced that you would never wake up. And the doctors said that if you did, there was a strong chance you wouldn't be the same person you were before the accident. How'd you manage to wake up, anyways?"
James blushed lightly. "When...when I felt you kiss me and say that you loved me. And then that little speech you gave me. Those things made me realize that I needed to come back, I needed to see you again. I couldn't just leave you here. Because I love you too. I've loved you since the day we made that promise to always protect each other. I love you, Kendall Knight, and nobody else." James smiled and pulled Kendal, in for a kiss just as the doctor walked in.
"James Diamond, you're awake. This is surprising and very good." James looked up at the doctor and smiled his mega-watt smile. "Hey doc. Meet my boyfriend, Kendall. Now, when can I get out of here?"
The doctor smiled. "Well, Mr. Diamond, your charts have improved drastically. Your heart rate is stronger, your numbers are up and your back is healing extremely well. We are making arrangements to have you moved out of intensive care this afternoon and into the general hospital. It's almost like your friends healed your body just by being here. Today is nothing short of a miracle."
Kendall smiled and held James' hand. "You're right about that, sir. Today is a day of miracles. For example, I can walk once more, even if it does hurt a little bit. I got my boyfriend back against all odds and he's twenty times better than he was hours ago." Kendall placed a light kiss to the inside of James' wrist.
"I'll go arrange for your transport, Mr. Diamond," said the doctor before he left them alone. As soon as the door shut, the two boys embraced each other, crying tears of happiness. "Everything is finally turning around. Everything we know is changing," Kendall said, his face nuzzled up under James' chin.
James smiled and ran a thumb over his cheek and gasped. "Why are my hands so gross?! Kendall, where is my Cuda hand lotion?!" Kendall chuckled. "Relax, James. Today is the first day any of us have come in to see you. Logan was planning on bringing some to you tomorrow when we came back, but now we won't have to."
Almost on cue, Logan and Carlos piled into the room. Their eyes lit up and they softly dogpiled the bed, laughing and smiling and hugging James. The four boys all crowded onto the bed, happy to finally be together again. They chatted on and on, talking about their own experiences and emotions snce the crash, including the new relationship between James and Kendall. They fell into a comfortable silence, relishing being together again. Logan was the first to break the silence.
"I say we promise never to give up hope on each other. No matter what happens, we always assume the best. Agreed?"
Carlos smiled. "I agree. We can't lose each other." Kendall nodded his head fervently. "Always hope for the best, even in the darkest of times." James was the last to speak. "Hope is the one thing that kept me fighting when I was trapped. It was the one thing in my mind that was tangible. I grabbed it and held on until it brought me back here, with help from Kendall. Never let it go."
All four boys smiled and put their hands into the center, the same way they would before a game or a concert. "Together forever?" Logan asked. "Forever together," they answered before falling into another hug, tears of happiness flowing down their faces and mixing together on the bed sheets below them.
A/N: How many of you actually thought that James was going to die at the start of this chapter? How many of you thought Kendall was hallucinating? How many of you saw this coming and are just like 'Psht, I saw this coming, you didn't surprise me at all.' Either way, that is that, next chapter will probably be coming to you real soon. But for now, we're gonna keep this groove. BTW, first person to name that song will get a one-shot written for whatever pairing they want, straight or otherwise :D See y'all soon. ~Love Ya, Nikki