Severus had never felt this content; indeed, the feeling was beyond contentment and bordered on the euphoric.
"Uh-oh," he heard Angel utter.
Severus turned from staring at the light bulb, which had just become very bright and started swirling with a rainbow of colors..
He saw Angel staring at the liquid they were putting on pieces of blotter paper. It had been clear, but was now amber-colored.
Severus looked down and saw that somehow, his satchel with his Magickal First Aid Kit had opened, and some of the contents had spilled into the clear liquid, causing it to change color.
"Ooops!" Severus stated, looking up at Angel, and then laughing. Angel started laughing, too.
"Ooops!" Angel repeated. "I think we got some on us!"
They had been warned that under no circumstances were they to get any on themselves.
"Oh well," Severus conceded. "Ooops."
This was very funny. He could not stop laughing. Neither could Angel.
The light bulb was definitely doing strange things. It sparkled as if casting off hundreds of diamonds. The now-tainted liquid sparkled, too.
Severus retrieved his wand from his satchel. Perhaps he could fix the damage that had been done.
He waved the wand over the liquid, and muttered some words. The wand gave off neon-colored swirls and sparks; it had never done so before, but to Severus it now seemed like the most natural thing for it to do.
Rather than restoring the liquid to its original state, it turned darker and swirled. It looked for all the world to Severus like gelatinous tortoise-shell.
"Ooops!" Angel laughed.
"Ooops!" Severus agreed, hardly able to put his wand back in the satchel, he was laughing so hard.
What were they doing here?
"It's pretty, dude!" Angel observed, staring intently at the liquid, which now seemed imbued with energy, swirling and sparkling on its own.
While Angel was fascinated with the liquid, Severus was distracted by the light bulb. It was literally pulsating, like a heart. Neon-bright colors swirled from it. He realized that he could hear the electricity flowing, like blood through a vein.
Music was playing somewhere, and Severus became aware that it, too, was somehow connected to the energy of the light bulb.
The sound was a liquid, living thing; and because he too was a liquid, living thing, he and the sound became one. Severus discovered that sound was not just for the ears; it was tinged with colors of all shades and hues, and that it also had a taste and a smell.
He looked over at Angel who, he saw, was now haloed by thousands of sparkling diamonds, creating a crystalline glow about him. Severus wondered how Angel was able to do that.
Severus closed his eyes, but the colors and the sounds and the tastes and the smells were even more vivid. It felt like he was flying, but flying through a vast space that was his inner self.
Somehow, he knew that this was something that had been in existence forever, and it was strangely familiar. This was the real reality; everything else was illusion.
All his senses became one; there was no differentiating between taste or smell or sound or sight or touch.
Severus had no idea how much time had passed; when he opened his eyes, Angel seemed to be gone.
Severus then had the strangest sensation, and when he looked down, he saw that his torso was missing. For some reason he did not find this alarming.
As he watched, his feet, hands, legs, arms, and shoulders disappeared, and then his head until, like the Cheshire Cat he remembered from the story in school, only his mouth remained, and then that too disappeared.
He looked down to where the "he" that used to be he used to be, but instead somehow "saw" (although since he no longer had eyes, he was not sure how he was seeing) images of castle-like buildings, and of hallways, tunnels, and corridors. He also saw geometric structures in the shape of cubes, cones, and spheres that somehow he knew were places of higher learning where he longed to linger.
The walls were crystalline just as Angel had been, and while they gleamed, they were also somehow dark and mysterious at the same time. The walls seemed alive, quivering, trembling, and throbbing with energy.
Severus realized that he was in a living universe, which was an extension of his self, and that he in turn was an extension of the universe. All was one. Everything was connected.
He could no longer tell where his "self" ended, and the "walls" began.
He became aware of a beautiful, glowing light. There were people all around him, and when he looked, everyone turned from a Muggle into a wizard or a witch. Severus laughed.
They were all waves on a vast sea of consciousness. Severus became aware that he had the capability of transforming the world solely by his thoughts alone.
Somebody was talking, or perhaps singing, or perhaps chanting.
And he sit down in the middle o' de' fire,
And he say,
"Shhhhhhhhhhiit, baby! I ain't gonna make rope no more!"
Severus agreed.
"Shhhhhhhhhhiiittt, baby!" he yelled. "I ain't gonna make rope no more!"
But then it seemed as if all of the circuits in his brain had started to run wild, and were now out of control. It seemed as if he was caught up in whole universes of insanity.
He saw a huge turtle, as big as the universe itself. Severus thought that it must be the turtle whose shell he saw turned into liquid.
The turtle turned and looked at him, and Severus knew that it wanted him to climb on its back, and so he grabbed the turtle by the tail and hoisted himself onto its shell.
However, as soon as the turtle started to move, it turned into a snake. This startled Severus more than it frightened him; the snake was rather pretty, seemingly made of emeralds and blinding white gold.
Next, the snake turned into the stem of a giant flower, and when Severus looked up from the base of the stem that he was holding onto, he saw that the head of the snake had turned into a white lily, opening and closing like a heart beating.
The more Severus stared at the flower, the more he desired to be devoured by it, to be lost in the depths of its throat forever.
But the two yellow stamens within the flower suddenly glowed red; the stem of the flower again turned into the body of a snake, but this time it was pale, the color of dead flesh.
Severus looked up at the flower again, but it had turned into the head of a man, really no more than a skull with dead flesh stretched over it. The head had no nose, and the glowing stamens had become blood-red eyes.
"You are mine!" the man-snake hissed, coiling its body into a circle and swallowing it's own tail and thereby threatening to swallow Severus at the same time.
Severus yelled and jumped off the snake, which then disappeared.
He saw his mother. She looked sad and beautiful and terrifying, all at the same time.
"Mum?" he called, reaching out for her (although since he no longer had arms and hands, he again was not sure how he was doing it).
But his mother just looked at him sadly, murmured "Goodbye, Severus," and floated off into the distance, before disappearing.
On the other hand, perhaps she had shrunk down to nothingness. Severus was not sure.
The universe started turning inside out. Severus was desperately frightened.
Memories of the past that he thought he had forgotten or repressed he was now was forced to relive.
He was little more than an infant, still in diapers, grasping the bars of some prison that he realized was his crib, crying and crying. He was hungry or his diaper needed changing, it did not matter...he needed a parent's love and attention, and none was forthcoming.
The universe turned inside out again, and he was once again reborn into a childhood of demons and nightmares. This time it was his father yelling at his cowering mother, and then knocking her across the kitchen so that she fell between the refrigerator and the sink.
The next rebirth into hell, and he was walking home from school when he was six years old, and some Muggle kids were taunting him, and then pulled his pants and knickers down so that he tripped and fell, and they all stood around and laughed at him.
Severus lost track of how many times the universe flipped, and he was reborn into hell. The more he tried to fight it, the worse it became.
He became aware that these were worlds of his own construction, and that they were desperately lonely worlds. There was really no one there but Severus himself.
How lonely Hell must be, he thought, for the person who has said "No" to love.
As soon as he had that thought, it became much lighter. He was aware of others around him, but for some reason he was convinced that they did not want to be around him.
"Go!" he ordered them. "Go away! Leave me!"
"We won't leave you, Sev," a familiar voice answered. It was a loving voice. He was sure he knew that voice. A warm hand gripped his own.
It was warm and light again, although not the blinding light of before. He opened his eyes, and recognized that he was lying by the minibus. Someone had put the canopy back up, and the colors were pulsing. Annie's tie-dyed designs were like a window into another reality. Severus would have to tell her that.
"What the fuck wrong w'you!?" someone yelled, and Severus felt someone hit him hard on the shoulder.
He turned to look, and recognized Azalea; she looked like a lioness, with her hair rippling like a halo around her head, bright reds and oranges and yellows shooting out all around her, it was like looking at a Sun Goddess.
"Be careful, man," someone else was saying, "like, you don't want to make him have a bad trip, man."
Severus looked to see who was speaking, and saw Free kneeling beside Azalea, a Moon Goddess of Serenity, with shades of indigo and violet emanating from her.
"We're here, Severus," the person holding his hands was saying. "Everything will be okay..."
It was Yesmina, shining like an angel with a halo of green and blue, her blonde wavy hair rippling and giving off it's own light, a Goddess of Earth and Sea.
Severus just smiled.
"He trippin'!" Azalea spat out in disgust, getting up and going to sit in the corner with her arms crossed.
"Can you sit up?" Yesmina asked, giving a slight tug on his hands.
Severus did not say anything, just continued to stare at Yesmina and her eyes, which were shooting sparks of violet and purple, but he did push himself up on his elbows to sit up. He felt Free's hands on his back to help him.
Once he sat up, he continued to stare at Yesmina and Free, with an occasional glance to Azalea. He was amazed that he had never before realized how beautiful they all were, especially with the sparkling colors each possessed.
They had daisy-like flowers in their hair, and Severus noticed some more flowers laying on one of the quilts, wilting in the summer heat.
Severus felt sad for the flowers. They were lonely. He remembered how lonely Hell was, and that it was that way because one turned one's back on love.
He let the flowers know that he loved them. And they responded by opening up. When he stopped thinking about them, they closed up again.
He again let the flowers know that he loved them. They again opened. Azalea was looking at a record album cover, but Free and Yesmina saw what happened to the flowers.
Severus now understood how Lily was able to so easily do what she did with flowers -- it was all about love. Lily was love.
And now Severus was, too.
He looked at the flowers that were in Yesmina's and Free's hair, and let those flowers know they were loved. They opened widely, and then closed.
Severus sent them love again, this time telling the flowers to listen to his heart, and know that while it was still beating, that he loved them.
The flowers responded by opening and closing in time to his heart.
Yesmina's eyes grew wide, and Free felt the flowers in her hair.
"Far out!" Free exclaimed.
Azalea looked up, wondering what the commotion was about. Severus sent love to the flowers in her hair, too.
"What the...?" she mumbled, reaching up to touch the flowers in her own hair, and then staring at Severus with a mixture of awe and fear.
"You just have to tell them that you love them," Severus told her. "The flowers. They need to know that they are loved."
"Like, that's really far out, man!" Free exclaimed, for once shaken out of her usual serenity. Yesmina just stared cryptically at Severus.
"People are like that," Severus observed. "Everyone needs love. Everyone will open up like those flowers, if they just know that they are loved. We all have that ability..."
"Heavy, man!" Free nodded, returning to her usual serenity.
The record player was out, and the music enveloped Severus and the girls. And the canopy. And the minibus. They were all one.
Severus noticed that the pictures on the record albums were moving, much like the magickal pictures at home. Nobody else seemed to notice the new phenomenon, though.
The Beatles were actually walking on Abbey Road, exiting off the right side of the album and returning on the left. However, unlike normal magickal pictures, these could talk.
John Lennon on one jaunt around on the album cover turned to Severus with his hand raised to his mouth to shield what he was saying from his other band members.
"I really did bury Paul!" he stated in a stage whisper, but as Paul was just then returning on the left-hand side, he heard what was said. He glanced at John, and then turned to Severus.
"No! I buried John!" he asserted.
Severus did not understand any of it.
"See you around, kid," John called out to him, as he again walked off the album cover. Ringo and George waved at Severus.
Aretha Franklin was talking to Azalea, who ignored her as she looked at the back of an album by The Temptations, who were dancing on the front of their own album.
Jim Morrison walked up to the front of his album cover.
"You rode the snake, Wizard King," he stated cryptically. "There's no closing the Doors of Perception, once they're opened..."
And with that, his eyes glowed bright red, and he flicked his tongue, which was forked like a snake's.
Severus became frightened and confused.
"Where's Angel!?" he demanded, suddenly realizing his friend was nowhere in sight.
"Steve be out lookin' for him," Azalea stated, putting down the record album and staring at Severus. "He be lookin' for hours, now!"
Hours? Severus realized for the first time that not only was the sun out, but it was also in the western sky.
"What time is it?" he asked.
"Just past three in the afternoon," Yesmina told him softly.
Three in the afternoon!? Where had the time gone? When this had all started, it was an hour or so before dawn. Almost eleven hours had elapsed, but to Severus it only seemed an hour or two.
Where had he been for all that time? Had he actually traveled to all of those places, met all of the people and creatures he had seen?
He became confused and disoriented. The multi-colors of the canopy were no longer beautiful, but distracting.
"Gotta find Angel," Severus mumbled, stumbling out of the canopy opening.
Suddenly he was alone, and the sun was no longer visible in the now grey sky. No one was around. All the concertgoers were gone. He tried to remember who he was, but could not.
A line of crystalline spiders crawled toward and then past him. More spiders came from every direction. He had to keep lifting his feet to avoid stepping on them.
It was getting dark, shadows were growing longer. The spiders glowed with an inner light of swirling neon. Suddenly, they all stopped and turned to him, telling him how much they all liked his smock.
The paintings on the school buses pulsated and shimmered, and the flowers painted on them opened and closed.
One bus had a painting of Jesus' head on it. Jesus looked at him, and He said just one word.
Severus was amazed at its profundity.
o
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
o
It was back around the turn of the centuries Now old Jack Johnson Like I say ol' Jack Johnson he was a pugilist He says, "Uh, hi, Jack..." He says, "What's up?" He says, "Where abouts?" Ol' Jack says, "That's groovy baby! That's really groovy, you give me a ticket on the next flight out!" Ol' Jack says, "Well how'm I gonna get there baby?" Folks, she's the world's biggest ship He says, "You mean I'm goin' over on the boat?" He walks on up to the ticket taker. So here's ol' Jack, he's got his ticket He gettin' on down by the pier side Now around this time there was an I-talian senator So there's ol' Jack standin' on the bottom He get up onto the top and So Jack says. "It's all right baby, it's all right. So the Titanic she sails on out into the North sea I'm gonna tell ya 'bout the people on the Titanic now. First of all there's a whole bunch of Jewish people from Miami. Then there was the people that run the boat. Then there was the Captain. Then there was the first mate. Now I gotta tell ya bout the First Mate. He, uh, he wants to go on over to England Anyways, this fella, his sideburns, they're just a little too long. Down in Mexico Some of you people grow it in flower pots under your bed…ehh! Anyways, he's down there and he's, One day the rope factory, she catch fire, He gets inside, He gets to the Titanic He says, "I'm comin' on" He says, " He says, "Well, I got me two changes of BVD's. He says, "Four hundred and ninety seven and a half feet o' rope! He says, "Oh, I just carry it." So he says, "It's all right. Go on board, go on board," and he did. That brings us up to what's happenin' now - Everybody else is hoistin' up landlubbers and battenin' down hatches The Captain comes on out He comes on out and he's standin' now He walks on over to the First Mate So the captain takes himself a little puff. He went for a walk. He went, he went out walkin' around the boat, He walked around the wheelhouse once. And the Captain, he say, " So this time He says, "Now the idea, Captain, So the Captain says, "Alright." He walked around the wheelhouse. He came on back in. He laid down. He played a game of cribbage. Went upstairs, He had the television, He walks up on deck, So the First Mate see him standin' up there on the rail So the Captain, he let it all out at once. O-h-h-h, this just brings us up to what's happenin' again folks! Everybody else is hoistin' up landlubbers, And the Captain's out cold on the wheelhouse floor All of a sudden, the Captain's eyes popped And he did, right on into an iceberg, and she went right on down. That's the true story of the Titanic, folks. She took with her all the Jewish people, She took with him the Masked Marvel comic books, Meanwhile back on the stateside He pulls it on up and And stuck right above it was a wet roach, man! That boy was so happy Fare thee well Titanic, goin' down!"
Back around nineteen hundred & thirteen
There was a Negro pugilist
His name was Jack Johnson
He was the toughest man in the whole wide world
He used t'walk around whoppin' people up side the head
And makin' all sorts of money
He was a pugilist by preference and by profession
And one day ol' Jack came walkin' on down by the pier side
He's just walkin' on down
His manager come walkin' on down by the pier side
He says, "Hi, manager..."
He says, "Whatcha doin'?"
He says, "I'm just walkin' on down by the pier side."
He says, "I gotta gig for ya"
He says, "Ya gotta gig for me?"
He says, "That's right"
He says, "Over in England"
He says, "Hmm... what'm I gonna do over there?"
He says, "Well you goin' up and whop this guy up side the head and make all sorts of money."
He said, "Ticket on the next flight out?!? This is nineteen hundred and thirteen!
Why the Wright brothers haven't even started foolin' around with Kitty Hawk yet!"
He said, "Uhh…who she?"It was midnight on the sea
The band was playing "Nearer My God To Thee"
Fare thee well Titanic, fare thee well
And he says, "Ohhh, I'm gonna show ya,"
And he whips open a newspaper and shows him a picture of the USS Titanic.
She's made outta good wood and good iron
They said she'd never go down
And he says, "That's right, baby, you're goin' on the boat!"
And he says, "Well, let's go get some tickets,"
So they head on down to the ticket taker's place
He walks on in and he says, "Hey man, I wanna buy me some tickets!"
He said, "Gotta red ticket, green ticket, yellow ticket, blue ticket, what kinda ticket you want?"
He says, "I wanna red one."
He gave him some loot and he laid it on him.
Now he takes everything he owns
He wraps it on up in a diaper and
He hangs it on a stick over his back
And goes headin' on down by the pier side
His manager's down there by the pier side
And here she is folks - the USS Titanic!
She's lined up beside two hundred and fifty parkin' meters
And the Captain's gettin' done ready to split
'cause he run outta dimes.
And the state house and all I-talian senators
Done got brothers own construction companies
And this one had a brother
He owned a construction company
And the Titanic, she was made outta good I-talian wood, good I-talian iron
They said she'd never go down.
Got everything he owns wrapped on up in that diaper
Hangin' on a stick over his back
He shakes hands with his manager
Goes walkin' on up the gangplank
The Captain standin' on the top
The Captain he look at the ticket
He look at the ticket
He look at Jack
He look at the ticket
He look at Jack
He look at the ticket
He look at Jack
He look at the ticket
He look at Jack
Lookatta
He says, "Sorry baby, wrong color."
He says, "Me or the ticket?"
And he says, "You."
It was midnight on the sea
The band was playin' "Nearer My God To Thee"
Fare thee well Titanic, fare thee well
Now they wouldn't let Jack Johnson on board
They said this ship don't haul no coal
Fare thee well Titanic, fare thee well
I'm gonna sit right here on the pier and watch you go right on down!"
She's out there floatin' around
In and out between the icebergs
And ol' Jack's standin' on the pier
They're jumpin' up and down They're laughin'.
They're drinkin' booze. They're tradin' wives and Cadillacs and diamonds,
And havin' all sorts of good clean party fun.
Now the people that run the boat, they know all about runnin' boats.
They know all about hoistin' up landlubbers
And battenin' down hatches,
And doin' all sorts of other good things
Like all good sailors do, when they're far away at sea.
Now the Captain, he knows how to walk like a captain,
Write like a captain, walk like a captain,
Talk like a captain, smell like a captain, eat like a captain,
Do all sorts of captain things.
Now the First Mate,
He don't know nothin' about Jewish parties.
He don't know nothing about hoistin' up landlubbers.
He don't know nothin' about captains.
He wants to play his guitar..
He wanna run around and chase women,
And have all sorts of good...times.
He give it away, see.
He, he been down in Mexico, he been down in Mexico.
He been workin' in this rope factory down in Mexico now.
They make rope outta this funny little hemp plant
That grows wild in the ground.
He's makin' rope outta this funny mari-juana plant..
And he runs back on in to save his lunch -
He's got two sardine sandwiches -
Runnin' back on in to save his lunch.
And there's all this funny smoke floatin' around up inside
And he gets some of this funny smoke up inside his head
And he sit down in the middle o' de' fire,
And he say,
So he takes everything he owns
He wraps it up on into a diaper and a knapsack, too
And he, he headin' on to the Titanic
He standin' on the bottom walkin' on up the gangplank
And the Captain's standin' on the top
And the Captain says, "What you got boy?"
I got me my guitar. I got me my address book, a pair of socks,
Four Masked Marvel comic books, a tennis racquet
And four hundred and ninety-seven and a half feet o' rope."
Whaddya got that for?"
The Titanic, she's floatin' around in and out between the icebergs
The Jewish people, they be partyin'
They tradin' wives and Cadillacs and diamonds
They drinkin' booze and havin' all sorts of party fun
The First Mate, he's hangin' over the rail
He's havin' himself a little smoke
He's diggin' the icebergs
Havin' himself a little smoke and
It's the Captain's time to do his thing
(remember I told you about the captain -
He knows how to walk like captain,
Write like captain,
Talk like,
All sorts of captain things)
His thing right now is that
He's gotta go out and test the wind
So he casts his nose up into the north wind
And he goes...
sniff sniff sniff
He says, "Hey First Mate, what's that you smokin'?"
He says, "That ain't nothin' but a little ol' cigarette, captain!"
And he says, "I don't believe it. Gimme a puff!"
And he says, "Alright."
Nothin' happened right away.
He says, "It's alright, it's alright.
It's just a cigarette. I'm goin' for a walk."
And that's what he did, folks.
He went walkin' toward the wheelhouse, he,
He walked around.
He walked around the wheelhouse twice.
On the third time around the wheelhouse,
The First Mate he looked on over at the Captain and
And he say, "You wanna 'nother toke, Captain?"
He's gonna tell the captain a little bit about this smoke that he's smokin'.
The idea is to get this smoke way down deep inside your tummy
And hold it there just as long as you can,
It'll make you head feel good all inside."
He takes himself three big tokes off that funny little brown weed and
He says, "I am commencing to hold it in!"
He went downstairs, he laid down.
He got up, he ran in the other room.
He sent a radiogram.
He took a shower.
He come out.
He shaved.
He got up again.
He turned on the television.
He turned off the radio.
He read his Masked Marvel comic book.
He walked through the kitchen,
Made a cup of tea, made a cup of coffee,
Sat down, ate a piece of pie,
Played another game of cribbage,
Went back in,
Finished his other Masked Marvel comic book,
Laid down.
The radio,
The egg beater,
The air conditioner,
And everything's all goin' at once.
And this is fifty two minutes later,
And this cat ain't breathed yet!
He's all puffed up like a balloon!
He says, "Ya gotta let it out, Captain!
Fallin' right down on the wheelhouse floor.
He's out cold.
The Titanic, she's sailin' around in between the icebergs
Everybody else is havin' parties
The Jewish people, they jumpin' up and down
They tradin' wives and Cadillacs and diamonds and drinkin' booze
Battenin' down hatches and doin' sail things
The First Mate's hangin' over there on the rail
Havin' himself a little smoke and diggin' icebergs
He stood right up straight, grabs a hold o' de wheel.
Looks on out at the bow o' dat boat, and he say,
"I'M GONNA MOVE YOU, BABY!"
She went right to the bottom.
All the First Mates.
She took with him the Captain.
She took with him the landlubbers.
The tennis racquet,
And four hundred and ninety-seven and a half feet o' rope.
Ol' Jack Johnson, why he's standin' up on the pier
He's fishin' away
He's got himself a little stick and a line and
He gets a tug
It's a big, wet, blue soggy mess and
On the inside, on the lining
Written in big gold letters
It says, "USS Titanic"
He started doin' the Eagle Rock
Up and down that pier like it's goin' outta style
He go, he gonna do the Eagle Rock now
Everybody in for the Eagle Rock
Oh rock!
Jamie Brockett