CHAPTER 10

Cooking Time

"Congratulations to all of you who managed to reach here alive and well. Here, at Biska Forest Park is the site of the next phase of your exam. The 2nd phase of the exam shall now begin. I wish you all good luck." With one final announcement, Satotz left the examinees.

The gates opened only to reveal several cooking facilities lined up on the expanse of the land and two people who are obviously the second phase's examiners.

"We are the second phase examiners, Menchi…" A girl who looked in her twenties declared. Her blue hair was tied in knots and she wore a rather revealing outfit.

"Buhara." This time it was the other examiner who spoke. He was a really huge guy with a more enormous stomach.

The examiners then proceeded to explain their task. They were tasked to get the main ingredient, pork, from the surrounding forest and they are to cook it using the cooking facilities prepared. They pass if they cook something delicious that will satisfy the examiners' palate and the exam will end when the examiners already have their fill.

Leila looked around the forest trying to find the main ingredient of the task.

'Where are we supposed to find a pig in this forest anyway?'

Gon, meanwhile, just continued to walk around and the others followed him not really knowing what else to do. Then suddenly Gon jumped off a slope and slid himself down. The others, of course, followed. Killua gleefully slid himself down the slope following Gon. Leila followed then Éclair, Leorio was fourth, the next is Kurapika and the last one was Iris. Their quite enjoyable slide came into an abrupt stop though. Gon suddenly stopped which made Killua bump into him.

"Gon! What's the big idea?! Why did you sudden-"

Killua felt something bump into his back but that wasn't the reason why he stopped. It was the sudden feeling of something soft touch the shell of his ear. Was that…what he thought it was?

"Killua, gomen." Leila's voice came from his back. "I kinda accidentally…kissed you on the ear. Gomen." Leila apologized.

Killua blushed. Now, he was really grateful for Gon's abrupt stop.

"Oi, you white haired grandpa, you better not be thinking of something perverted." Éclair commented.

"Shut up, you dwarf from hell!" Killua retaliated.

"NANI?!"

Gon chuckled. "Killua and Éclair really get along well."

"WE DO NOT!"

A moment later, Leorio uneventfully bumped into Éclair amidst the argument then Kurapika followed. Then Iris eventfully bumped into Kurapika's back. It was only eventful for Kurapika though. Blood rushed into Kurapika's cheeks. Something really, really soft touched his back and he has a pretty good idea of what it is. The girl, meanwhile, is completely unaware of the effect of her feminine parts on the teenage blond with her full attention on the sight ahead.

There were pigs. A lot of them and more than that, they were huge.

"Guys, we found the pork." Iris announced dumbstruck at the sight.

"They're huge…" Leila commented quite amazed.

"They look weird." Éclair remarked a bit taken aback.

"Uh…they're chewing bones?" Leorio commented in disbelief.

"Don't tell me…they're carnivores…" Kurapika concluded.

"I guess we should start running?" Gon suggested as the pigs turned their attention to them.

The pigs ran after them tossing the other examinees in the air when they got in the way.

"Oh! I remembered something important." Iris suddenly announced as they ran.

"About what?" Leila asked.

"About these pigs." Iris responded.

"Then please spill because these damn pigs are a menace." Éclair grumbled as she run.

"I think they are species called the Great Stamp." Iris informed.

"They are the most ferocious pig in the world?" Kurapika asked for clarification which earned a nod of confirmation from Iris.

"Great to know." Leorio's words dripped sarcasm. "Now, any idea how to stop them?"

"As I recall, their weakness is…" Iris ran faster ahead then promptly turned around taking her weapon from her thigh. It extended into a steel pole then she jumped up towards the pig. Then she successfully hit the pig squarely in the forehead in her descent. The pig immediately fainted.

"So their weakness is their foreheads." Kurapika observed. "I guess their hard nose evolved to protect their soft foreheads."

Then Kurapika moved into action. Following what Iris did, he hit the pig on the forehead with his own weapon. Leorio hit the pig with his briefcase. Killua's hit seemed too fast for an accurate observation but he successfully made the pig faint. Gon led his pig to an apple tree that made the apples fall into its forehead. Then Gon finished the task with a hit from his fishing pole.

Leila led her pig a bit of a distance away from the group then she took a stone from the ground. With a quick and accurate aim, she landed a hard hit on the pig's forehead. Lastly, Éclair took her dagger from her bag. She jumped up towards the pig descending on its back. Then she jammed the butt of her dagger hard on its forehead.

Now, they all have their main ingredient. It's time to go back and cook.

The examinees began roasting their pigs and after few minutes later some examinees already presented their dish to the examiners but so far none of them have passed. Well, Buhara gave them an okay but the problem was Menchi. She was very particular about the taste of the dish and she found something wrong with every dish presented to her.

After observing some failed attempts of some examinees, Kurapika concluded that they may have a greater chance of passing if they cared about the presentation or rather the appearance of their dish.

Leorio, hearing this, confidently strolled to the examiner and presented his dish. It was the whole pig with a little flag standing on its back.

A tick mark appeared on Menchi's head. "WHAT IS THIS?! A KIDDIE MEAL?!"

Needless to say, Leorio was unsuccessful. Then Gon took his turn. He decorated his dish flowers and presented it.

"THIS IS JUST THE SAME THING!" Menchi threw another dish.

Another failed attempt and now, it was Kurapika's turn. He used some of the prepared ingredients provided. He made some kind of pork sandwich. Presenting it to Menchi, the ticked off examiner took a bite thinking that somebody finally gave her a decent dish with a decent appearance.

"THIS IS DISGUSTING! YOU ARE NO BETTER THAN 403!"

Kurapika went back to his post dejectedly. Of all people he could be compared with, it was Leorio he was on the same level with. All the while, Killua didn't even attempt to try.

The boys were rather unsuccessful so now it's time to turn the camera to the girls.

IRIS

Iris stared at her roasted pig thinking what she should do with it. If someone asked, she'd say she's a rather decent cook providing there's a recipe she could follow but now…there's no recipe. She has no choice but to experiment.

She chopped the pig into pieces then put it in a pot. Then she looked for the other ingredients in her pantry. She spotted some seasonings and vegetables. Then she took the soy sauce out.

'This might be a good addition to my dish.'

Iris turned the fire on then she poured the soy sauce in.

'How much should I put in? I guess it won't be that bad if poured the whole bottle in.'

And she did. Next, she spotted some vinegar. Thinking that it should be the same proportion as the soy sauce, she also poured the whole bottle vinegar in. She stirred the pot. Now, her dish turned into some kind of soup.

'If it's a soup, then I should also put some vegetables.'

She tossed a variety of vegetables in the pot not bothering to take note what those vegetables were. The she spotted some other seasonings and began putting them. She put pepper, salt, sugar, ketchup and other things she did not bother to remember.

After stirring for a while, Iris concluded her experiment finished. She then presented it to the examiner.

Menchi gave Iris a strange look.

"Is this even edible?"

Iris Summers = FAILED

LEILA

Leila's dish is progressing quite nicely. In fact, it was ready to eat. Like Iris, she chopped the pork into pieces and with some seasonings and vegetables here and there, it turned out quite decently. It looked delicious and maybe even tasted delicious. Unlike the others, Leila got a lot of experience under her belt when it came to cooking. She helped Mito-san cook a lot of times. But even though her dish was quite ready to be eaten, there was still something missing on her dish according to her own personal opinion.

Racking her brains for the missing ingredient, Leila stared at the seasonings in front of her. The she spotted it: chili powder. I mean, what's a dish without a bit of spice? So she gleefully poured the whole bottle of chili powder in and carefully mixed it in her dish. Then she gave it a taste test.

'It's still not spicy enough.'

She needs more chili powder. Then she looked towards the boys.

'I guess they won't mind if I take their chili powder since they already failed.'

Then she took the boys' chili powder in their pantries. She was able to procure four bottles.

'Perfect.'

She mixed in the chili powder she just procured and gave her dish another taste test. It was still not spicy enough for her but close. Deciding it's finished, Leila presented it to the examiners.

Menchi gave the dish a pleased look. Finally, she got something to eat that looked more like a true dish. Without further ado, she took a bite.

"THIS IS HELLISHLY SPICY!"

"What? But it's not even spicy enough." Leila argued.

Taking a big gulp from the water Buhara thankfully gave her, Menchi gave Leila a death glare.

"ARE YOU FREAKING SERIOUS?!"

Leila Sparks = FAILED

ÉCLAIR

Éclair stood up at a top of a tree with a gadget out. Why is she on a tree, you ask? She was looking for a signal, an internet connection to be exact, but unfortunately she found none. She sighed in defeat. She wanted to download a recipe from the internet. She can cook but she needs a recipe to follow or there's a terribly high chance that she will mess her dish up. She's been looking for a signal for the last thirty minutes.

'I guess I better go back. No point in continuing useless endeavors.'

Smoke greeted her when she got back on her post.

'Shit. I left the fire on.'

Her pig was already black. Well, she might as well present it to the examiners.

Menchi gave Éclair an incredulous look. "What is this? Charcoal?"

"It's roasted pig…it just spent too much time playing with fire."

"And why is that?"

"There's no internet connection."

Éclair Rainsworth = UNDOUBTLY AND UNQUESTIONABLY FAILED

After a few more failed dishes later…

"Sorry guys, we had our fill. Exam's over. No one passed. Try again next year." Menchi announced.

Author's Note: I'd like to thank ereynon1 for reviewing. I really, really appreciate it. Ereynon1, it made me very happy to know that you liked the humor in my story.

Then I'd like to give another thank you to ereynon1 and Hime2700Tsuna for favoriting and following my story. :)