I've only got about an hour, so this one might be a bit short.
Thank you to a Guest called Goldoon for this prompt/idea/whatever-you-want-to-call-it.
Warning: Cake does not actually nullify the effects of alcohol in real life. Gaara is just weird.
Gaara walked down the streets of Suna with a plate of cake, a sand dome around him to hide himself from civilians and the disastrous revelation that their leader ate cake.
Temari and Kankuro walked back down the streets with their brother, separated by a large dome of sand, in which he carried his cakes in white standard bakery boxes. In Temari's hands lay plastic bags filled with Campbells candy (peach, of course. Gaara tended to hog the cherry flavour). Kankuro carried many, many boxes of cookies form the same bakery where Gaara bought his cakes from.
The siblings were walking back to the redhead's office when a blur of green came crashing down on his dome. The sand shield broke open, revealing the intense amount of baked sugar. Rock Lee landed on Gaara's shoulders, very thankfully avoiding the boxes of cake.
Lee looked around at all the boxes, clearly coming from a bakery. "Are all these yours?"
"Yes, obviously, as they are all being carried by me." Gaara rolled his eyes. "Why?"
"How do you not gain any weight?"
"Because I exercise a lot." Gaara answered, picking up the brunet in green spandex and throwing him over his shoulders, away from the boxes of cake (impressively far if you realize how heavy Lee would be without his weights). "Was there a reason you fell on my shoulders?"
"Yeah, actually." Lee dusted himself off. "Someone at the tower's claiming she's carrying your baby, and I happened to be there for classified reasons, so I came to look for you."
"I'm a virgin, case closed." Gaara sighed and his hair looked frazzled. "Why do people always insist I've slept with them just because they're pregnant? Find another man to harass, for goodness sake!"
"I dunno, you do get drunk a lot."
"I eat cake, which nullifies the effects of alcohol... Somehow." Gaara seemed confused about that, himself.
"HOW DO YOU EXERCISE WHILE EATING CAKE?!" Temari exclaimed furiously. What she really meant: 'How do I do that, too?'
"Because I'm terrific at multitasking." Gaara answered, lifting his fork to his mouth and licking away the frosting.
"THAT'S NOT AN ANSWER!"
"It is to me."
"YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY INSANE!"
"Thank you. I appreciate the compliment."
Temari yelled profanities while walking away.