Hey everyone! I am so terribly sorry for the long wait... I have absolutely no time nowadays, but I swear I'm trying to write as quickly as I can... I hope there are still people reading this and if yes, thank you so much for your patience! I hope you'll like this chapter!

Disclaimer: I don't own OUAT or the characters...

Chapter 10

The cold breeze swept over the castle grounds, blowing fallen leaves across the yard and onto the marble that covered the little square that surrounded the apple tree but Regina was feeling none of it. She was safely snuggled into a huge armchair in the library, warm and content in front of the fireplace with a book in her lap. She was gazing at the pages, seemingly immersed in the story but in reality just lost in thoughts. She fiddled with the ugly, big golden ring on her finger that was the symbol of her captivity but it was just a habit she picked up over the last three months of being married to the king. Her thoughts were at much happier places than her marriage. She thought of curly golden tresses and sparkling forest green eyes. Of a smile so bright that it could lighten up her whole day no matter how bad it was before. Emma had been living with the Royal Family in the castle ever since the wedding and Regina couldn't have been more grateful for it. Without her she would have surely gone insane already. But Emma was there every day, a distraction, a barrier, a safe place for her. Never asking too many questions but always offering comfort.

Regina didn't like talking about her marriage to the king. About what was expected of her as a wife, as a queen. She liked to keep her mind off him whenever possible. And Emma seemed to understand that. She never pushed Regina to open up, she never asked about a bruise here and there and she never ever brought up the king in a conversation between the two of them.

Sounds of muffled laughter filtered into the library and broke Regina out of her reverie. She slowly flicked a page and looked down on the words as the sound got louder, indicating that the source of it approached.

"Nooooo Emma, that's not fair! You can't open your eyes!" came Snow White's chirping voice and as Regina glanced up she saw the young brunette leading the older princess with a hand on her elbow, the blonde's eyes closed but opening the slightest bit from time to time as Emma squinted to see where they were going.

"I'm not opening them!"

"You're peeking." Snow pouted as they stopped a few feet inside the library. "Do you know where we are now?" she asked after a second, her tone laced with the naive excitement of a young child, instantly forgetting her earlier upset state.

"Of course not! You spun me around so many times I don't even know in which wing we are…" Emma insisted though Regina heard the hiding laughter in her voice as the princess indulged Snow.

"Great!" she squealed and then urged Emma to take a couple of more steps forward, towards Regina. "Don't open it yet, don't open… just a little more…" she instructed and for once Emma really stayed with her eyes shut closed, probably because she knew the library well enough to not be afraid of bumping into anything even without her eyesight helping her.

"Where are you leading me Snow?" Emma asked, playing along and the child giggled.

"You'll see! Just a few more steps…" the brunette pulled Emma's hand until the older princess was standing almost right in front of Regina's armchair then she stopped her and positioned her so that she was facing the queen.

Regina took a moment to lose herself in their silly game and let a genuine smile spread on her face. Of course not because of Snow White's annoying over exitedness or the attempted authorative tone she hit as she bossed Emma around. No the smile was for the blonde alone, her patience, her own laughter and then those wrinkles at the corner of her eyes that Regina adored so much. It was for the mischievous tone in her voice as she spoke, the red dress hugging the blonde's body in all the right places that made Regina's heart flutter.

"Can I open it now?" Emma asked as Snow stepped back.

"Yes." she said and she sounded so damn anxious, Regina would have guessed she even held her breath as she watched Emma slowly open her eyes.

But the older brunette wasn't paying any attention to Snow anymore. All she had eyes for was Emma. She fixed her own eyes on the blonde's, waiting to catch a glimpse of those emerald pools of joy and love. And sure enough as soon as Emma had opened her eyes they found Regina and her whole face softened and a radiant beam took over her features.

"Surprise!" Snow called out with a grin, waving an arm to motion towards Regina.

"The best surprise ever…" Emma murmured as she took off and practically launched herself onto the brunette, whow as still sitting in the chair.

The impact of the blonde's body was barely felt as Regina welcomed her with open arms and she resisted the urge to kiss Emma, instead just buried her nose into her blonde curls, inhaling her sweet scent deeply. Emma sat onto her lap and clutched at her tightly, hugging her like it was just the two of them in their little bubble, the whole wide world shut out. But that was how she always hugged Regina, that was how the brunette always felt with Emma. It was silent and loving and intimate in a way but completely presentable even in front of a child at the same time.

"Hello dear…" she murmured to Emma with a fond smile, her voice deep and kind of alluring not that she was trying to make it so or anything.

"Regina." her name fell from the blonde's lips like a prayer, breathless and full of emotion and for a second she was tempted to lean in and press her mouth agains't Emma's but she reminded herself that they weren't alone.

"I though you might feel lonely in here so we came to keep you company…" Snow said and a bitter smirk spread on Regina's face. The girl didn't even know just how right she was about that, she was so alone. When she wasn't with Emma she felt like she was lost. She had noone she could trust, nobody to love apart from the blonde.

"You're right, I am rather lonely." she answered sadly, saying the complete and utter truth without the little girl realizing it. Emma caught it though because she squeezed her hand briefly.

"Well not anymore!" Snow cried out happily and she jumped up onto the couch next to Regina. Emma was still perched on the brunette's lap and didn't seem like she had any intention of moving from there to which Regina would have had no objections whatsoever if it wasn't for the fact that any minute a guard or a maid could walk by and see them. And someone more mature than Snow would surely put together the pieces. There was no use in confirming the already present suspicions about them. Regina sometimes saw the servants' eyes on herself, saw the way the guards looked at Emma, felt how every time they were seen together there was a tension in the air like everyone was waiting for them to do something scandalous. But they were very careful, only kissing behind carefully locked doors or dark corridors and when they got a chance to spend a night together they always sneaked back into their own chambers before the sun was even up. Still there were whispers and rumours going around, though fortunately neither Regina's mother or the king has heard them otherwise Emma would have already been banned from the palace or worse…

So to avoid any of that happening Regina gently put her hands on Emma's hips and pushed a bit, motioning for the princess to move off of her. She saw the slight disapproving pout on the blonde's face as she complied and she had to repress a chuckle. Emma didn't go too far though, she just plopped down onto the thick, soft carpet at the foot of the armchair and leaned back on Regina's leg with a smile. The brunette couldn't help but run her fingers through the princess's hair once before she focused her attention on Snow, who oblivious to their little moment, already started talking about something.

…..

"No. No no please… don't… no…" Regina's horrified mumbling woke Emma in the middle of the night many weeks later.

She blinked sleepily, not quite knowing what made her stir at first but a muffled cry from her side made her eyes snap open in alarm. She shot up and wildly looked around in the room, searching for the cause of Regina's anguish but saw only the darkness staring back at her. There was noone in the chamber besides them.

"No please…I'll do anything… NO!" the brunette screamed and her body started to shake violently, tears slipping down her cheeks.

"Regina! Regina wake up…" Emma leaned over and stroked the other woman's shoulder in a comforting way, trying to coax her into consciousness without spooking her.

Regina tossed around in her sleep, shaking off her hand and turning away from her while sobbing.

"Regina please… wake up…" Emma murmured, gently squeezing her shoulder again and shaking her.

"No…no…" the brunette mumbled but much to Emma's relief she seemed to be slowly regaining awareness. The blonde continued to caress her as Regina's eyelids fluttered and finally she opened her eyes. Teardrops were sparkling on her lashes and her whole body was still trembling but her brown eyes found Emma's and she held onto the princess's gaze as if it was the last thing keeping her tethered to the world.

"Hi…calm down, my love, it was just a dream…" Emma breathed, bringing a thumb up to wipe at Regina's cheek as the brunette turned back towards her fully.

Regina, still utterly shaken up from whatever nightmare she had, snuggled closer to Emma, who closed her arms around her and pulled her closer as she rolled onto her back. They lay there, curled around each other in the dark, the silence only broke by Regina's occasional sniffling.

"Do you want to talk about it…?" Emma asked hesitantly after long moments, running a hand up and down the brunette's back.

"No." Regina whispered into the crook of her neck.

"Okay… but if you change your mind…" She said and pressed a kiss into the brunette's hair.

Once again the silence of the night enveloped them and for a while Emma listened to Regina's breathing as it evened out, the chirring of crickets, the sound of the nightguards's steps outside, horses neighing and an owl howling in the distance. Her eyelids started to feel heavy and she allowed them to drop shut, fairly sure that the brunette already fell back asleep.

"It's Daniel's birthday tomorrow…"

The barely audible, broken whisper seemed to echo around in the darkness. Emma didn't dare move, didn't dare say anything she just waited quietly to see if Regina had anything else to add. The only thing she did was gently run her thumb over the other woman's shoulder to let her know she was listening.

"He would have been twenty this year…" Regina continued, her voice distant, emotionless. "We were supposed to sneak out and spend the whole day together. Just the two of us. Have a picnick or a long ride in the woods."

"That sounds nice…" Emma murmured when Regina was silent for a few moments.

"He will never turn twenty now. We will never run away together… and it's my fault. Emma, he's dead because he loved me… you shouldn't love me. You can't love me!" she said, getting all passionate about it by the end and she pulled away from the blonde to look at her.

"Don't be silly. I love you, it's not something I can turn on and off…"

"I don't want you to die too. You can't die!" Regina cried out, now sitting next to Emma with wild eyes.

"Okay, I'm not dying…shh…" Emma assured her, sitting up as well and cupping the brunette's jaw to pull her into a short kiss.

"Leopold killed him…" Regina mumbled after they broke apart and Emma was about to correct her when she added. "In my dream. I dreamt that it was Leopold, tearing his heart out of his body and crushing it in front of me. Telling me it was my fault…" she said, voice full of self hatred and a single tear slipped down her face as she averted her eyes.

"Hey! Look at me…" Emma said and she tipped Regina's chin up so she could hold her gaze once again. "It wasn't your fault and we both know it… Don't even start blaming yourself over it because it's stupid." she ordered but her tone held a softness that took the blow from her words. Regina stared back at her somewhat defiantly for a few seconds before she literally crumbled before Emma's eyes, her shoulders sinking and her eyes losing their fire and shining with new, grateful tears.

"Thank you…" she whispered, laying back down and pressing a sweet kiss onto Emma's lips before settling back into the blonde's arms. "I love you." she breathed before she closed her eyes again and soon both of them were back asleep.

….

The next day, in the early hours of the afternoon while Snow was occupied with her classes Emma came to Regina with a shy suggestion that maybe they could honor Daniel's birthday somehow.

"I know it's not what you planned, I know I have no right to share this with you and I didn't even know him at all… But I know he was a good man, he loved you and you loved him and he made you happy and I'll forever be thankful to him for that… " Emma rambled self consciously as she stood in front of Regina in the garden. "We don't have to, if you don't want to… And if you just want to be alone, say the word and I'll be gone. And you don't have to worry about Snow troubling you or anyone, I'll take care of that… I just thought maybe you wanted to honor his memory somehow and I guess all I'm trying to say is that I'm here for you if you want me here…" Emma finished lamely, looking down at her feet for a moment before glancing up at the brunette from under her lashes.

Regina just sat there under the apple tree that was now considered as 'The Queen's tree' all around the castle thanks to the fact that it was the place where Regina spent all of her time whenever she could. She just sat there and looked up at Emma like she was seeing a wonder.

And Emma was staring to get worried that she did something wrong when the softest of smiles spread across Regina's face and she slowly stood up. Without a word she extended her arm and slipped her hand into Emma's, entwining their fingers. Then she led them into the stables, only pausing for a second in the doorway to take a deep breath before she walked straight up to the box of Rocinante. Emma caught up quickly enough and the two of them readied their horses without saying anything. Then Emma helped Regina up into the saddle, wondering even after months at her side how gracefully she moved, how perfectly she sat on top of her horse even in a huge gown. She got onto her own horse too and Regina led the way, riding towards the forest.

They spent the rest of the afternoon riding along sunlit paths and across flowery meadows until Regina stopped Rocinante at the bank of a little river. Emma came to a halt beside her as well just as the brunette effortlessly slid off her stallion and crouched down next to the water.

Regina reached up and took the single, white flower from her hair that she picked up from the ground earlier and with slightly trembling hands she put it onto the surface of the water. The flow took it and moved it so the flower started its travel with the waves of the river. Regina stood and took one step back, eyes never leaving the flower as it swirled and swayed on the water.

"Happy birthday, Daniel." she whispered into thin air.

Emma got off her horse as well and slowly stepped up to the brunette, sliding her arms around Regina's waist from behind. Her eyes were fixed on the flower as well, following its track down the river as she sent a prayer for the man who had to pay with his life for not having been born into a noble family. Who had to pay with his life for love. But somehow deep in her soul Emma knew that Daniel would have thought it was worth it. She knew it because that was how she felt, loving Regina was worth anything.

"Thank you…" Regina's weak voice broke her out of her thoughts and when she looked down she saw that her words were directed at her and not the flower. They locked gazes, the brunette's eyes glimmering with unshed tears and all Emma could do was lean down and press her lips against Regina's in a gentle kiss again and again and again…

So this was it for the chapter. What do you think? Did you guys liked it? I would love to read your opinions so please please leave me a review! It would mean the world! Thank you for reading and a giant thanks to those who take time to review, alert or give any sort of feedback! :)