So here's what you missed on Alone With You
-Santana meets Brittany at the coffee shop and Brittany convinces her to sign up to perform at a show next week
-They meet up with Quinn and Rachel so Quinn can tell the girls Puck is on his way to visit
-Santana volunteers to sleep out so Quinn can have to apartment to herself and Brittany volunteers to let her sleep with her
-Rachel goes out to ice cream with Finn, leaving the girls alone
-The eat ice cream while watching the O.C. in Brittany's bed and chit chat about love and such
-Santana wipes some remaining ice cream off of Brittany's lip and after a short pause Brittany kisses her
-Brittany pulls away flustered and begins apologizing but Santana quickly pulls her back into a kiss
XxxxxxxxxxxX
My stomach flips as Brittany's smile closes softly around my lips. Everything around us evaporates and I swear I feel like we're the only people on the planet. She holds her lips against mine while her hand slowly drags off my cheek, intensifying the chill down my spine. Her lips close around mine before she pulls them off of mine.
I let out a sharp breath as my body shudders. Our foreheads rest against each others as I try to catch my breath.
I don't open my eyes. I don't want this perfect moment to end, and I'm worried as soon as I open them, reality will set in. The feeling will be gone and I'll wake up from this beautiful dream. My heart is pounding so hard that I can feel my shirt lifting up and down with my chest.
The only thing calming me at all is Brittany's breath, audible and warm against my lips. It's almost as choppy as mine. I take one last deep breath before I begin to open my eyes.
Her piercing blue eyes are staring right at me with a soft expression. The blue comforter surrounding us only makes her eyes seem even bluer.
Neither of us move for what feels like eternity.
Slowly but surely, Brittany's lips turn upward into a small smile. Her lightness returns and I can't help but smile along with her. I don't show any teeth, but I know my eyes are really smiling. Brittany's eyes are sparkling and they release even more butterflies in my stomach.
But she doesn't say anything. Her smile grows as she bashfully looks down towards her hands averting my gaze. Brittany begins lowering herself down the bed and she places her head directly on my chest, closer to me than she has ever cuddled. Her arm wraps completely around my stomach and tightly squeezes.
I shift down a little so I can get a better view of her. She's still smiling, even bigger than before, and her cheeks are noticeably red.
Her head is slightly rising up and down and I realize my chest is what's lifting it. Partly from my breathing, partly from my heartbeat. It's hammering in my chest and I'm absolutely positive she can feel it.
I should say something. Anything. But I can't. Something is blocking my throat.
Maybe it's better this way. Anything I say is going to lead to some sort of discussion about what just happened, and I don't want it to possibly ruin this moment or how I'm feeling. If it means talking about it later so I can enjoy this right now, maybe that's better.
My fingers slowly tickle up and down Brittany's bare arm. My stomach is still pulsing and my heart is still pounding, minutes after the kiss has ended. My cheeks are beginning to hurt from fighting off this smile.
Brittany's thumbs draw little circles on my stomach over my shirt. Wherever her finger touches leaves a blazing trail on my skin.
How the hell did this happen? All of this. I thought the first kiss was amazing, but this was incredible. Probably because she isn't drunk and I know she has to be aware of what she's doing. And there's no Sam. It's just us. She kissed me, too, didn't she? I just can't believe this is happening. How did this happen?
But that's not what I'm really thinking about. I'm thinking about how I'm feeling. Nothing has ever made me feel like that. Never. I didn't even know it was possible to feel that way. Like I'm on top of the world. Like I'm invincible. All from a fricking kiss.
Brittany's thumb slowly stops circling against my skin and I lift my head up for a second and see her eyes fighting to stay open. Seconds later, they flutter shut and I allow my smile to spread wider. Until this moment, I don't think I've truly realized how beautiful she is. It's like that kiss opened my eyes. Well, maybe not opened my eyes, because I saw how pretty she was before. But maybe it gave me glasses. Everything is so much clearer, and things that seemed beautiful before are intensified. Even her skin. It always had a glow to it, but right now it almost looks magical.
Brittany's breathing changes and I realize she's asleep.
The computer is still on and we aren't even under the covers. But if I move, I'll wake Brittany. I decide I'll just hold her tighter and keep her warm. I let the computer play the episodes as I close my eyes, taking in the moment.
XxxxxxxxxxxX
"Mm," Brittany hums as her head nuzzles against my chest. I slowly open my eyes and quickly see that hers are still shut.
I smile immediately, remembering last night. My mouth tingles a little, feeling her lips against mine. A warmth shoot through me as I realize we're under the covers. The computer is gone, too. Brittany must have woken up, moved the computer, and tucked us in. Then, cuddled right back up to me.
I let out a relieved sigh when I realize she couldn't have regretted the kiss when she woke up. Otherwise, she wouldn't have cuddled back up to me, right?
Brittany shifts a little against me, probably from my sigh, and slowly eases herself off of me.
"Good morning," she groans as she opens her eyes.
"Morning," I smile. I can't help but let out a soft laugh. She looks totally disoriented. It's cute.
"Did you tuck us in?" I ask. Brittany nods sheepishly as she sits up against her backboard.
"You looked cold," she shrugs. "I hope that's okay."
"Of course," I smile. I can't remember the last time someone tucked me in.
"We finished season one," Brittany smiles.
"Huh?" I ask.
"Of the O.C.," she smiles. "We've already finished season one."
"Woah, really?" I ask. I have to call Sugar. It's kind of rude of me, really, to not have called yet.
"Mhm," Brittany smiles. "I have season two, though. So you don't have to buy it. You can just borrow mine," she tells me.
"Or I can just watch it with you," I suggest. Brittany smiles like a child way too excited for Christmas morning.
"Yeah?" she asks.
"Yeah," I smile.
She stands up out of bed and I can't help but check out her legs. They're really sexy, even when she's in boxer shorts and a bare feet. I start to feel a little strange. I've never really had these strong of sexual feelings from such simple things. Is this even normal? I quickly shake the thought. Of course it's normal.
"I'm starving," Brittany groans as she walks towards her door. "You coming?" she asks.
I quickly nod and follow the blonde towards the kitchen.
"Oh!" She squeals as she opens her pantry. "Frosted Cheerios!"
"My favorite!" I skip over excitedly. I'm not usually the one to food shop for Quinn and I. We normally don't even have that much food in our apartment. But I'm easy going and let Quinn pick out what she wants. I always forget to ask for what I want, too. So we never have stuff I love, like this.
Brittany grabs us bowls and spoons as I grab the milk. We sit up at the counter and I begin to pour the cereal in when the apartment door creaks. Someone slowly closes it behind them as Brittany and I crane our necks back to see through the open doorway.
"Berry?" I let out a loud laugh. Rachel's face drops as she looks up at us, totally caught. "No way," I laugh in disbelief.
Rachel sighs as she tosses her bag down on the couch and walks into the kitchen with her head down.
"Aren't those the clothes she left in?" Brittany asks me under her breath.
"Ladies and gentleman," I announce, "the walk of shame!"
"Shut up," Rachel shoots me a glare. "And not true!" She quickly adds.
"No?" I tease, clearly not believing her.
"We didn't, you know," she mumbles. "We were just talking and I fell asleep."
"Oh," I say. Rachel nods, looking relieved.
"So I suppose you got that hickey on the way home from some stranger?" I joke.
Rachel's hand shoots up to her neck and Brittany stifles a giggle.
"Okay, so we made out a little," she confesses.
"I'm just playing," I laugh. "So it went well, then?"
"Yeah," she smiles. "We were just talking while we got ice cream, you know, about normal stuff. It was like we were never apart. And I felt so comfortable. And then, as we were leaving, and I was about to go home, he kissed me," she blushes. "And it was just like we never missed a beat."
"Yay!" Brittany chants. Rachel and I both giggle a little.
"So he asked if I wanted to go over a talk a little more, and he meant it too. We talked for like three hours. And then we kissed some more, yeah, but that's it!"
I nod, happy but still a little skeptical. I just don't want her to get hurt, I guess.
"How was your night?" Rachel asks. "You have fun?" I know Rachel isn't asking it to mean anything, but my face heats up. At the same time, I feel Brittany's eyes fall on me. When I look at Rachel, I see her brow crease as she looks at us.
"Y-yeah," I stutter. "I had a lot of fun," I confess in a stronger voice.
"Same," Brittany smiles at me. I lean back down to shovel some cereal in my mouth but Brittany continues to smile at me.
"Well," Rachel says, and Brittany's eyes shoot away. "How do you think Puck and Quinn are doing?"
"I forgot about that," I confess.
"We'll see them at dinner I guess. You guys are going, right?" She asks.
"I guess," I say. Brittany nods along.
"I gotta shower," Rachel says as she begins to leave.
"Shoot, what time is it?" Brittany asks as her head shoots to the clock. 11:34.
"Already eleven?" She mutters. "I told a girl from class I'd help her for an audition. I gotta go," she says as she stumbles out of the kitchen towards her room.
"On second thought," Rachel smiles, "my shower can wait."
I roll my eyes as she sits down beside me in Brittany's seat. I don't say anything, I just continue to eat my cereal.
Seconds later, Brittany sprints out of the room and screams bye before slamming the door behind her.
Rachel continues to gaze at me until I finally moan.
"Ugh, what?" I bark.
"Nothing," she smiles.
"Go shower."
"Not yet," she says. "Why was she looking at you like that?" Rachel asks.
"Like what?" I ask, suddenly curious. Maybe I should be annoyed that Rachel's so into my business, but I don't have anyone else talking about this with me.
"I don't know, she was just smiling at you like- like," Rachel stops. "She was staring at your lips."
"She was just watching me eat," I shrug.
Rachel's eyebrows crease. Was she really staring at my lips?
"But you had fun?" Rachel asks as she stands up. I think it's clear I don't want to talk, so Rachel decides to give me some space.
"Yeah," I nod as I begin to slurp up the remaining milk from my bowl. It's my favorite. The sugar from the cheerios mixes with the milk and makes it all sweet.
"Good," Rachel smiles. She takes one long look at me before she starts to turn away.
"Wait," I say as I snatch her wrist in my hand.
"Hm?" She says as she turns back towards me.
I swallow the lump in my throat and shake my head back and forth. I don't know how long the pause is, but it's long enough for Rachel to say, "What?" again.
"We kissed," I blurt out. Rachel's mouth widens. I can't believe I just told her that. I just- I needed to tell someone. I can't believe it happened and how I felt and now I don't know what to do about it and I just- I needed to get it off my chest.
Rachel lets out a choppy breath. "You kissed?" She repeats. I nod. "Santana!" she squeals as she throws her arms around me again. She's so dramatic.
"What? Tell me everything!" She sits back down.
I shake my head and close my eyes, remembering every detail perfectly.
"I mean, we were watching the O.C. and eating ice cream. And then she was asking about love and stuff. And then she had some ice cream on her lip. And I-"
"You kissed her!" Rachel blurts out in disbelief.
"No!" I correct her. "I- I wiped the ice cream off her lip, with my thumb, because she couldn't get it." I stop when I see Rachel's shocked face. "But then she kissed me!" I say flustered.
"How was it?" She smiles softly.
"Great! Until she pulled away! Then she started apologizing and got all nervous."
"What did you say?" She asks.
"Nothing," I breath. "I just, I kissed her."
Rachel lets out a high pitched squeal as she covers her mouth with her hands.
Rachel tries to hug me again but I push her arms off mine.
"Stop that," I chuckle. "But seriously," I say as my face falls. "It was perfect. But-"
"But what?" She asks confused.
"We haven't said anything about it."
"Nothing?" She asks.
"Nothing."
"What did you say after you guys kissed?"
"Nothing," I say again. "Literally nothing." Rachel's eyes narrow. "She smiled. Then cuddled up to me and fell asleep."
"Aw," Rachel smiles. I roll my eyes.
"Yeah, it was nice then, but now what?" I say with edge. "After she kissed me, she said something about her school. About how there weren't a lot of available guys so sometimes- I don't know, maybe they did this kind of thing for fun! What if that's all that was to her-"
"San, calm down," Rachel tries. "Try to talk to her. I mean, chances are if she kissed you she wanted to kiss you."
I sigh. I guess that makes sense.
I slap my forehead and Rachel laughs.
"What was that about?"
"She's got me going insane," I shake my head. "Listen to me, I sound like you."
"I know," Rachel giggles. "I love it."
XxxxxxxxxxxX
"It's about time," Sugar's voice booms through the phone.
"I'm sorry!" I chuckle. "I meant to call!"
"Better late then never, I guess."
I smile as I sit down on Brittany's bed, tightening my towel around me. I got in the shower right after Rachel got out and decided I had to call Sugar before I forgot to.
"Well, season one down."
"Already?" She squeals. "Oh my gosh I'm so proud!" She gushes. "Is it not the best thing you've ever seen? Do you love it? Or do you love it? And Seth Cohen? Are you in love?"
"I love it," I laugh.
"Did it change your life?" she asks, dead serious.
I stop as my mind drifts to Brittany. Did the O.C. change my life? It kind of feels like maybe it has. Not in the way Sugar means, but it's what brought Brittany and I together in a way. So I can't help but feel like maybe it did, or will change my life. I smile and immediately feel in debt to Sugar.
"Completely," I confess. "Thank you so much," I tell her sincerely.
"Of course!" She smiles. "I can bring season two if I visit or mail it to you?" she offers.
"That's okay," I tell her. "My friend," I pause, deciding if that's what I call her. "She has all four seasons."
"Who?" She asks.
"Rachel's new roommate," I tell her. "Brittany."
"Sounds like I'd like her," she says.
"You would. But you still have to come visit!"
"Duh. So Finn and Rachel?" She asks.
"Quinn and Puck, too," I tell her.
"What?" She squeals. "What the fuck are you with Sam again, too?"
"No," I laugh.
"What the hell is that about?"
"I don't know," I confess. "I still think Finn was a huge douche lord, but he seems kind of sincere this time. But I haven't seen Puck yet. I'm going to dinner with them tonight."
"You better call me," She says. "What's your deal?" She asks. "Any hot New Yorkers in your life?"
My mind immediately turns to Brittany.
"Nah," I tell her. "Riding solo. I haven't met any guys worthy enough," I joke.
The door opens and Brittany walks in, hair in a ponytail and her forehead glistening with sweat.
"You'll find one," Sugar says.
Brittany smiles at me shyly and I realize I'm still in my towel. And on her bed.
"San?" Sugar's voice calls through the phone.
"Oh, sorry," I stammer. I must have missed what she was saying when Brittany walked in. "I gotta go," I tell her. "We'll talk soon."
"Let me know about Puck and Quinn? Love ya! Mwah!"
"Love you too," I laugh as I hang up.
"Hi," I smile to Brittany.
"Hey," she smiles.
"How was dance?" I ask.
"Good," she says. Brittany nonchalantly removes her workout tank, revealing her hot pink sports bra. My stomach squirms as my eyes fall over her bare abs. Her body is perfect.
She searches through her drawers for some clean clothes.
"So there are no worthy guys in New York?" Brittany jokes.
My face reddens. "I was messing," I tell her. "That was my friend from home. She thinks I should have a new guy like every week." Brittany smiles. "She's actually the one who sent me the O.C."
"Oh," she says in recognition. "Nice."
Brittany lightly walks around the room, searching for something, I think a shirt.
"You need help?" I ask.
"Nah," She smiles. "Just finding clothes for tonight."
"Oh right," I say. "I better grab mine." I stand up and walk over towards my small bag and pull out the only clothes I brought for tonight, dark skinny jeans and a loose cream short sleeved shirt.
"I'm gonna hop in the shower," she says as she leaves the room.
I feel like I should feel awkward after that. Our conversation was short. But something about Brittany's presence is so calming and comfortable. She's probably just tired.
I change into my outfit and shake my hair dry in my towel. When I flick my towel off my hair it knocks against her dresser and a book falls onto the floor. Out falls a photo of a little girl, covered in make up in a pink tutu. I giggle at her rosy cheeks and lipsticked-stained teeth.
"What's that?" Brittany's voice startles me.
"Oh, uh, sorry," I blush. "It fell down. I didn't-"
"Aw," She smiles. "Troy!"
"Troy?" I ask. Brittany walks over and leans down next to me to pick up the photo.
"That's my sister," she smiles.
"What? No way," say. "I totally thought that was you!"
She giggles. "Yeah. She's my mini-me."
Brittany stands up and lifts the book with her. It's not till then that I realize she's still in her towel. My heart stops for a quick second before I stand up with her. She sits down on the edge of her bed and opens the book, revealing pages and pages of pictures. She starts smiling as she looks at all the pics. I slowly walk over towards her, completely curious.
"Can I?" I ask after a moment.
"Oh yeah!" She smiles as she pats the spot on the bed next to her.
I sit down as my arm rubs against her bare and still wet arm. She points to the first picture on the page.
"That's Troy last year," she says. The blonde girl bares a striking resemblance to her big sister. She's on a swing in some park smiling the same way Brittany does. Her eyes are just as blue.
"She's so cute," I tell her.
"That's my Dad," she smiles proudly as she points to the next picture. A tall, fit man with light brown hair and blue-green eyes is smiling with his arms around a pretty Brittany. His arms are big. And he looks young. There are clear signs of aging, but he looks younger than my Dad. He's handsome, too.
Brittany giggles at a picture of Jeremy and her laying upside down on a couch.
She turns the page and a picture from a high school dance is in the upper right corner. Brittany looks flawless in a gold dress that falls mid-thigh. But she's in the arms of some guy. I look at the boy. His pushed up brown hair and brown eyes match perfectly with his tone, tanned, skin. Simply put, he's gorgeous.
"Is that-"
"Ryan," she breaths, confirming the boy in the picture is in fact her ex-boyfriend.
"He's really cute," I admit. It almost makes me angry how good looking he is.
"Yeah," she shrugs. She quickly moves on though.
Brittany's smile returns quickly. "That's my mom."
I look back down to the photo. A baby Brittany sits on her Mom's lap on a small couch.
"She's beautiful," I whisper. Brittany has her eyes. And her hair. And her skin. And her lips.
"Yeah," she grins.
We look through a few more photos, ones with her grandparents and ones from old dance recitals. Then Brittany looks up at me.
"What are your parents like?" She asks.
"My parents?" I repeat as I think about her question. She nods.
"You don't-" she starts.
"I'm really close with my mom," I tell her. "She's strong, supportive, and understanding. But she has the tough side like me. My Dad," I shrug. "He's kind of conservative."
Brittany's looking so intently at me. I've never had someone so interested in hearing about my life. It's almost intimidating.
"He- I love him and all, but he kind of screwed over my Mom. When I was in eighth grade I ran into him out to lunch with some woman. I thought it was from work, so I didn't think anything of it. But he thought I caught him. So he told my Mom before I could. For a full year, my Mom let him slide. Neither of them told me. I guess it was some affair," I shrug. But I don't guess. I know. He had an affair for a year before I caught him. And he kept doing it for a year after. I just still hate admitting it. "Then they got divorced my freshman year. I didn't know at the time what had happened. My mom tried to protect me. She wanted us to have a happy, normal family that she never got to have. But I knew they were fighting a lot more. So it wasn't totally out of the blue," I say.
"I'm so sorry," she says as she grabs my hand with both of hers. As she does it, her towel slips a little revealing the beginning of her chest, shaking my chest. She quickly grabs the towel and tucks it under her arm. Then she places her hand back on mine.
"It's okay," I tell her. "Thanks."
"Are you close with your Dad?" She asks.
"Well, I was. But I could never look at him the same after I found out. And he doesn't really like me performing. I mean as a career," I confess.
Brittany's face looks like something clicks.
"So that's why-"
"Partly," I nod. I've never told anyone that, either. That I'd let my Dad's opinions about performing determine what I do.
"I'm sorry," she says again. "That must be hard."
I shrug.
"By the way, did you think about what song you were gonna sing?" She asks.
"I haven't figured it out yet," I say.
"You better hurry!" She urges. "It's in four days!"
"Yeah," I laugh. "I live for pressure."
Brittany shivers a little.
"You should get changed," I smile. She giggles.
"Yeah, probably." She stands up and walks towards her dresser. With her back to me, she lowers her towel and tucks in around her waist, exposing her bare back. She clips on her bra. My heartbeat picks up from the look of her skin.
"I have a question," she asks softly. It's a quiet tone. Gentle, too.
"Yeah?"
"Did you actually have fun last night?" Her words are surprisingly fragile.
"Huh? Yeah, of course," I say, confused as to why I wouldn't have. Brittany lets out a breath that seems relieved.
"I have a question," I ask now. As fragile as her voice was, I know mine is probably even more fragile.
"Yeah?" she says turning towards me. Her chest is pushed up by her bra and my stomach flips. It's harder to speak and I'm relieved when she turns back around to pull her v-neck shirt on.
"Do you- have you done that? Do you usually do that?" I ask as quickly as I can before she can turn around and take my breath away.
"Huh?" She asks, confused. She turns to face me and I freeze up.
"I mean," My voice is strained and I try to calm it. "You said, after we, you know." My voice is a whisper and I can't keep my eyes on her. "Something about sometimes at school there weren't a lot of guys so, you-" my voice trails off because I think she can figure out the rest.
"Oh," she mutters. "I- I've kissed a girl before," she confesses sheepishly. "Girls at my school did it a lot when there weren't guys around. So I tried it once." Now her eyes are averting my gaze.
"It's okay," I tell her with a smile. I can see how uneasy she is.
"Have you?" She asks.
"Kissed a girl?" I ask. She nods. I shake my head.
"Just you," I finally breath.
Brittany pulls on underwear underneath her towel and then drops it, revealing her legs.
"I guess I'm pretty special then," Brittany says with a light laugh. She's clearly joking. But she doesn't know how right she is. I smile back at her.
"So then," Brittany starts what seems to be a question. But she doesn't say anything after that. I think she's figuring out how to word something. She pulls on white shorts and turns to face me.
There's a knock on the door on Brittany almost looks relieved.
"Yeah?"
Rachel swings open the door and smiles. "You guys almost ready?"
"Yeah," Brittany says. "Just let me put my hair up."
Rachel plops down on the bed next to me as Brittany combs through her hair.
"I'm excited!" Rachel shrieks.
"Me too," I confess. "I can't wait to see how their night went."
Brittany quickly braids her hair to the side and turns back towards us.
"I'm ready," she smiles.
Rachel stands up and heads to the door. I follow shortly behind but am stopped suddenly in the doorway by a tug on my hand. Brittany grips me tightly.
"I- I don't want you to think that's what that was. Because I needed to release... you know. I mean, unless that's what you- I- never mind," she says flustered.
"San? Brit?" Rachel calls from the living room.
"Coming!" Brittany calls. "I'll just- I'll ask you later," Brittany sighs as her hand slowly slips out of mine.
"No-" I try to correct.
"No," she says with a smile. "It's fine. Later," she promises.
XxxxxxxxxxxX
Hi guys! I'm back! This week is going to be a little hectic because of work and I have a friend staying with me for two days. But hopefully I can get a lot of writing done tomorrow. But after friday of this week work is over and updates will be very very frequent!
Let me know what you think!
Xoxo
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