On the other side of the line Kida looked around just in time to see Mikado not looking at all happy. So he decided to bluff and spoke into the receiver even though the line just went dead on him.
"I see, I will be there as soon as possible, Orihara-san."
Izaya cast Shizuo a questioning look.
"Did you hang up on Kida?"
Shizuo turned off the phone.
"No more interruptions."
With that said, they were on shaky ground now.
"For what it's worth, I'm sorry Shizuo…for being a jerk to you."
"Saying that doesn't make it all okay, you know."
Izaya nodded.
"But we've got to start somewhere. In our…I want to say 'relationship' but it's off."
"So it's 'we' now? You're just spinning things."
But Shizuo did not seem completely convinced of this.
"I'm not. I can't make you believe me but I mean it. But I suppose a fresh start is too much to ask for."
"Damn right."
Shizuo tapped his foot impatiently. Izaya finished drinking and arranged the pillows around in an effort to impose some sort of order and to keep his hands occupied. He too was restless.
"I guess I never grew up. A bit like those kids that annoy their crushes because they don't know any better. Before I knew it years had gone by and we were estranged."
"Don't use words I don't understand. You're smart but you got to act like a smartass."
Izaya sighed quietly.
"Thanks…for the smart bit. But I wasn't trying to confuse you."
"You have a way for making me feel retarded. Just because you're smart doesn't mean everyone else's an idiot."
Izaya looked into Shizuo's eyes.
"Shizuo, I am sorry."
"At least you're not '-chan'ing me anymore."
Shizuo was aware that he was evading Izaya's sincerity.
"Since you hate it so much. Is 'Shizuo-kun' better? Or maybe 'Heiwajima…san?'"
"Sounds weird to me."
Izaya was greatly surprised as Shizuo bridged the gap between them and placed lips on his forehead, softly, in a quasi kiss.
"Your fever's going down."
"I feel better now."
Shizuo seemed uncertain as to whether he should resume his seat, stand, or sit next to Izaya. In the end he took the last option, bedsprings creaking to accommodate his weight that was all titanic muscle and iron-like bone. This disparity between them struck him anew.
"You're always so pleased with yourself that I forgot you're actually pretty fragile."
Izaya allowed himself a weak smile.
"It's a miracle you haven't killed me up at point one or another."
"I don't like violence- don't you laugh."
"I'm not laughing."
"Good."
Izaya hugged his knees, wrapping slender arms in a protective gesture.
"I knew you were never serious about killing anyone, me included."
"I'm glad you're not too sick. If we don't count your brain, that is."
"Now that's just mean."
Shizuo hesitated. At length he sketched something of a caress in the way he ran fingers through Izaya's hair.
"I shouldn't care about you. And I always thought it'd be great if you just disappeared or something. But when the blonde kid told me you weren't well- and then you just blacked out on me like that- I didn't like it. Thought you were dying."
"No one would actually die from a fever."
"Dunno about that."
More silence. This time it was Shizuo who interrupted it.
"I was worried that you'd do something stupid and do like I told you and jump off a building. I was looking for you when I heard your phone ringing."
Izaya blinked rapidly.
"I don't know what to say."
Shizuo snorted.
"Now that's new. Unlike you, I'm not a bastard. So I felt bad about what happened."
"You're not a bad guy."
"It's you who is a fucking villain. And still- I'm not proud of how I acted."
"That makes two of us, then."
Shizuo nodded from within his cloud of gloom.
"You really feel better? It's just like you to put on some tough act at the worst possible time."
"Strangely enough I feel a lot better. Look, I know that we can't just ignore everything and turn a new leaf but do you think we can try to start as friends? I'll settle for that."
Izaya phrased it in very conditional terms. Yet he did feel much more at ease.
"I don't know. Cuz I have a feeling that as soon as you're back on your feet, you'll be stabbing in the back. Again."