Wow, you know what? I honestly believed that I'd typed this chapter already and posted it. Hmm… anyway, sorry bout the huge wait- I've been away almost all summer with only the occasional internet access… no way there was enough time to type this out and post it. Or much else, for that matter. So sorry, forgive me?

And a huge, big thanks (and virtual cookies and fresca) to all readers who have stuck with me. Enjoy the fresca as you read, k?

Heh. Anyway, here's the chapter…

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The Unimpeachable and the Condemned

When they finally landed, Matthew leapt off the Pegasus and towards the healing tent without hesitation, only to crash straight in to Serra. She was standing in front of him, blocking his way resolutely.

"Serra, what the hell are you doing?" Matthew growled incredulously, trying to get past her. She just spread her arms and legs wide, stave held like a weapon, blocking his way.

"You can't go in," Serra said, glaring him down- quite a feat, as he was half a head taller. Matthew burned with anger. "We've got every single person capable of using a stave in there now. We're short on staves as it is, so we can't afford anybody in there but us. It would break our concentr- Matthew!" He had tied to shove his way past her. She thwacked him with her stave, forcing him back. He vaguely registered how passionate Serra could be when it mattered. A furrow had formed between her bubblegum pink brows.

"Matthew. Please think. We need to be healing with everything we've got. Some staves have already broken, and we're even using some traditional medicine. Everything we've got. Some of them have even been poisoned." Matthew's face drained of color. Serra continued firmly, "you can't risk it."

Matthew slumped and nodded. Serra gazed at him for a few moments before Erk came out of the tent to gently lead her inside.

Matthew stood there, unmoving, barely even noticing as Fiora, Isadora and Kent came up behind him bearing the rest of his 'team'.

He did notice, however, when 2 men went rushing past him. Lucius was okay; he'd help with the healing. But Kent… Matthew reached out to grab the crimson knight.

Kent turned to him, looking uncharacteristically angry. Matthew locked eyes with him.

"They can't be disturbed," he said distantly. Kent looked as if he was fighting with himself before he too slumped in defeat.

"Sain is such an idiot," he muttered to himself, sitting on the ground brokenly. Matthew didn't reply, only started to pace.

"Hey Matthew," a young, weary voice sounded from behind him. The thief turned to see Nino gazing at him with red eyes.

"Hi Nino," he managed to reply.

"Guy way fine on the way over," she said quietly. She seemed to try to smile, but it came out oddly twisted.

Matthew nodded, feeling overwhelmed. "Good…" They stood for a few moments, trying to absorb everything. Then, in perfect synchronization, they collapsed onto the ground.

Nino giggled shrilly, mouth still twisted. Matthew let out a rough, sharp barking noise, feeling as if he was about to completely loose it, too. Them sitting in unison, so perfectly, had struck him as funny, too.

He let out a weird laugh, then tensed. What the hell was wrong with him? Nothing was funny at all. The woman he loved was dead. The man he loved may well be.

He felt as if everything was cracking, breaking, letting in a flood of unwanted emotions. He rose sharply, heading into the forest and scaling a tree.

Images other's love barraged him. Rath and Wil hugging one another wordlessly. Hector and Lyn, hand in hand murmuring to one another. Isadora and Harken pressing against each other as they walked…

Why didn't he get anything?

He grasped the branch above him, hoisting himself higher.

Why did the ones he loved always get hurt?

He clenched his hand tighter around the branch beneath him.

Why did he fall for the weak ones?

That thought came as the most unwelcome of them all. He shook his head, hoping it would shake free the thought. It lingered, trailing bitterness.

"No. They're not weak." He started talking aloud, finding it made his thoughts anchor. "They're the strongest people I know. I'm weak, if anything." He climbed up one more branch. "Leila was the best spy we had. She'd never betray anyone, never hesitate to do something that was right…" He felt his eyes water. He swiped at them angrily and continued speaking. "Guy has more determination than I've ever seen before. He'll try and try, never giving up. I know it."

He climbed one more branch. Now he was as high as he could go on this tree. "they're not weak. It's not their fault." He looked over at the neighboring tree appraisingly before leaping to it and climbing higher, as high as he could.

His head broke the tops of the trees. The sun was rising, the orange light darkening the leaves to black. He scrutinized the blackness.

"It's Nergal," he said quietly.

Finally, the tears started to flow, dripping down his cheeks and off his chin… and this time, he didn't try to stop them.

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Okay, there it is. Sorry about the angst abundance and everything… this story's kinda ran away from me (no pun intended… -.-). So yeah, I did loose all inspiration for this story, but I've written it all out so you will get the end. And I'm so, sooooo sorry about the age long wait… I know I promised the next chapter would be out the week after the last one (did that make any sense?) and here it is, in August… aw, sorry.

So yeah… see you all more towards September! Boy, do I have a lot to type for you guys… ;) many many new stories!

Speaking of which… would anyone be interested in beta-ing my next MattGuy fic? It's an AU… and it will be longish… It would be much appreciated! And it would be a chapter per 2 weeks from me thing.

Anyway, please, please leave a review? It takes what, 15 seconds and honestly does make me write faster and better .