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"Eat it," Troy folded his arms over his chest, glaring at Gabriella across the table.

Gabriella sighed, pushing her peas around a slice of toast. Troy was frustrated and she knew. All the more reason not to eat, "I'm not hungry."

"We aren't leaving until you eat," He grumbled, "I don't care if you're hungry or not."

"Stop treating me like a two year old," She retaliated, pushing her plate away from her.

"Do you really want to be like this Gabriella?" Troy glared, "Don't you want to get better?"

"Of course I do," She stuck a pea with her fork, forcing it down her throat.

"Then you can't put up a fight with-"

"How's everything going up here?" Jack interrupted, walking in with three bags of McDonalds.

"Fine," Troy responded, watching as Gabriella bent her head over the plate, trying to control gagging from smell.

"Mind if we join you two?"

"Course not," Troy smirked across the table at Gabriella as Jack called for Mason and Liam to come to the table.

"Want some fries?" Jack held out the red container to Gabriella and Troy.

"No thank you," Gabriella tried to politely smile and keep her face from showing disgust as she calculated calories.

"Well," Jack gestured to the table as Mason and Liam sat down, "Eat up."

Troy reclined in his chair with a smirk, "You heard the man."

The eating, the counting, was torture. Food had turned into a complex equation of numbers and an incredible amount of acting. Everything was cut into fractions, caloric intake already ingrained in her brain. Chew the food exactly seven times, swallow, repeat until plate looks semi-empty. Not good enough. For anybody.

Her mother made it easy for her to skip meals. Too easy. If she wasn't home, she didn't have to eat. Take fruit from the refrigerator, blend it with some orange juice, dump down sink, and leave the dirty glass on the counter to make it look like she'd eaten. Easy as pie.

When Troy wasn't around of course. Which he almost always was.

And if he wasn't, he'd call. Not his best idea, but he always checked in after he'd caught her 'forgetting' to eat when nobody was around. Can't fool him.

Her first counseling appointment was later that day. Maria, had actually remembered. However, couldn't attend. No worries though, Lucille could take her. It's like she was trying to deny that there was a problem at bay.

Getting dressed was a whole other task. Tank tops were out, they exposed too much of her protruding collar bone and skinny arms. T-shirts were fine, as long as they were looser, not that any of her tops were particularly tight anymore. The long cardigans she could wrap herself in and the oversized sweatshirts she longed to wear were unacceptable in the hot summer desert heat. Shorts showed off every line and curve that her thighs made.

Shorts and a t-shirt would have to do for the day. There was no hiding in public places, especially the hospital.

She herd Lucille's quick honks and grabbed her purse, double checking for her insurance card. Sliding on some gladiator sandals, Gabriella hobbled out the door and through Lucille's SUV.

"Hey," Lucille greeted with a cheery smile.

"Hi," She tried to return politely.

"Long time no see," Lucille joked, lighting the mood.

It'd been a whopping two days since Gabriella had visited the Bolton household, she chuckled, "I know, what are the guys doing today?"

"I don't know," Lucille spared a wink for Gabriella, "And quite honestly I don't care. It's Jack's problem today."

"I'm glad I could improve your day then," Things flowed smoothly between them. Light banter she couldn't actually share with her mother.

"Are you nervous?" Lucille kept her eyes focused on the road in front of her as they exited the freeway.

Gabriella took a deep breath, "Yeah."

"Well, it'll be good to just go and get it over with."

"Mhm," Her eyes drifted out the window at the passing landscape.

Lucille's hand patted her own, "You'll be fine sweetie."

"So," A plump man clicked his tongue while flipping papers on a clipboard, "Gabriella? Is that correct."

"Um, yes," She picked at a torn nail and tried to keep her movement to a minimum on the squeaky couch she was sat on.

"Why don't you start by telling me a little bit about your family," He wrote something down on a paper. He had yet to make eye contact with her.

"I live with my mom," She responded coolly, taking note of the books lined across multiple bookshelves in the room, many of them with his name on the spine. Obviously this guy was more into his research than his actual patients.

"Hmm," The man clicked his tongue again, "And your father?"

"I don't really know," Gabriella wasn't sure where to look exactly, "He got out of jail a few years ago, haven't talked to him since."

"Okay, okay," Dr. Percy responded, clicking his damn tongue twice, "Has that been difficult?"

Her mouth wanted to drop, "Yes."

"Interesting," Click, Click. "And you've been having trouble eating?"

"If you want to call it that," The room was silent. Black, white, and grey. A clock ticked in the background.

"And when did this begin to onset?" He took a few notes, or rather made it look like he was taking notes.

"Toward the end of the school year," She sighed, resting her elbow on the arm of the couch and her head on her hand.

Click, click, "Interesting. Now, who knows about this struggle you're having?"

"Uh, my mom," She droned on, "My best friend, his family"

"Okay, okay," He sounded stressed already, "Any drug or alcohol abuse?"

Wasn't he supposed to know that already? From, like, medical records or something? "No," Even if she had, it's not like she'd tell the truth anyway.

"Interesting," Gabriella rolled her eyes, it seemed like she'd be hearing that word a lot, "And any history of medical problems? Kidney, liver, heart disease? Diabetes?"

"No," No, no, no, no, and no. She wanted to scream at him. Did she seriously have to put up with this guy twice a week for the indefinite future? This guy was supposed to be the one to change her perspective on how she perceived her body? And nurse her back into health? Oh no, she didn't think so.

She zoned out the rest of the appointment. None of the questions required more than a 'yes' or 'no.' When their time was up he handed her a slip of paper and she slid out the door without a farewell. It was hard to believe he was 'the best' in the area.

"How'd it go?" Lucille looked up from the small hand stitched future quilt squares she'd brought along.

Gabriella continued her zombie like motions, handing Lucille the slip of paper, "Can we get out of here?"

"Yeah, of course," She quickly stuck the sewing needle back into her mini embroidery box and stood up, glancing over the slip of paper. A prescription. Lucille reached out to squeeze Gabriella's shoulder and gave her back a little rub.

They climbed in the car and headed back toward the suburban area of town. Gabriella closed her eyes and rested her head against the window until she felt the car roll to a stop, "You want to grab some tea?"

"Sure," While they waited for her prescription, Lucille and her walked over to a small local coffee shop. She glanced over the menu as Lucille ordered a small coffee without whip cream.

"I'll have a Chamomile tea," Lucille paid and added a fruit cup into their order.

She popped open the lid and slid the cup to Gabriella, "Eat a few." Then stood up and walked to the counter where their drinks were waiting for them. She whispered a quiet thank you and set them down on the table.

"So, we probably need to find a new counselor, huh?" Lucille sipped her coffee and popped a grape in her mouth.

Gabriella nodded, watching steam float off the surface, "Yeah."

"I wanted to ask you something," Lucille tapped her white tipped nails against the table top, "And I'm not going to yell at you or lecture you or try to shove food down your throat, okay?"

"Okay."

"Do you eat when Troy's not around?"

"I-" Gabriella stammered, then sighed, then spoke, "Not really."

"So last night, this morning," Lucille glanced at her watch, it was mid afternoon, "You haven't eaten anything?"

Gabriella decided it was a good time to grab a slice of watermelon, she held it up with a smile and popped it in her mouth. She shook her head.

"When was the last time your mom was home?" Lucille pushed the whole fruit cup to her, "Finish it."

Gabriella nodded, served her right, "Last time I saw her? Probably two nights ago. She comes home though. I can tell."

"Gabi," Lucille kicked into her social worker mode, "This is more serious than I think you know it is."

"I just don't want to deal with it," She slid her arms down on the table, folded them, and rested her head on them.

"I know it's hard," Lucille reached across the table to pat her arm, "But neglect is one of the six types of abuse."

Gabriella took a deep breath, "I want it all to go away."

She chose a black dress for the occasion. It was knee length with straps that crossed in the back. Gabriella knew she'd be walking in late, but she would have rather skipped the food portion of the evening.

The Bolton's were known for their backyard bonfires. There were the annual ones, homecoming, homework burning, end of school year, and then there were the spontaneous ones. The one tonight was mainly composed of the basketball team and a few girls; one last hoo-ra before the few who left for college in early August.

She climbed in her recently abandoned car for the drive to the Bolton's. As she turned the keys, she took a moment to pray that the car would turn on. Consequently, she smiled when it began to purr.

It was a short drive to their house and a long walk through the kitchen. Lucille wouldn't let her our of the kitchen until she had some food in her stomach. She secretly liked the way Lucille forced her to eat. It made her feel taken care of.

It'd been a while by the time she actually made it to the backyard, not that anyone was planning on leaving anytime soon.

"Well, well, well," Matt tapped his can of Coca-Cola, "Look who it is."

Troy turned around to see Gabriella inches away from the back of his chair, "Hey."

"Hay is for horses," She messed with his hair and he rolled his eyes.

"Here," Troy stood from the chair, "Take a seat."

"Thanks," She relaxed in the Adirondack style chair, Troy plopped his butt on the armrest.

"I thought you weren't coming," Troy wrapped his arm around the back of the chair, letting his hand dangle in the air by Gabriella's face.

Gabriella shrugged and the people around them continued talking, "It's not like I had anything better to do tonight."

"I'm glad you came," Troy bent his head down by her ear, "You look good."

Gabriella nudged Troy, they were gaining Matt's attention, "Thanks."

"Gabriella, you want a s'more?" One of the ball players passed a bag of marshmallows toward her.

She passed the bag on to Troy who took one along with a fork to roast it with. He got to work, making small talk with the person on the other side of him while he roasted the marshmallow to a perfect golden brown.

"Hey Gabi," A girl two chairs down said to get her attention, "Nice dress."

"Thanks," She glanced down at her lap and grabbed Troy's Sprite from it position on the ground.

"Makes you look real skinny," She had the hand of a basketball player on her thigh, "Gotta get myself a good LBD. Does wonders to your body."

"Yep," Gabriella nodded her head as some curls fell to cover the sides of her face.

Troy tuned in to their conversation, "Want a bite?"

She stared at the concoction Troy held out to her and gave it a little smile, "Maybe just a small one."

Troy tightened his arm around her shoulder and squeezed her in closer so that her head was resting against his chest, "Just a small bite."

As people cleared out, including Matt, Gabriella had stuck around, mainly watching late night television with Lucille. After the last person left Troy snuck in and sat on one of the side chairs. Lucille paused the television, "I wanted to talk to you two about something."

Troy stiffened and fixed his posture in his chair.

"Nothing bad," Lucille clarified with a light giggle, she glanced at Troy, "Gabriella and I were talking when I took her to her appointment the other day." Troy nodded, "I've been a bit concerned about Gabriella having so much time alone at home, so I was thinking maybe she should stay here until things get patched up between them."

"No, no, no, no," Gabriella shook her head, "I can't do that."

"Ella," Troy sighed, "You practically live here already."

"I know you guys care about me but really, I can't."

"Just hear me out please," Lucille held her hand up in a stop motion, "I was only thinking for a week. You know how we used to do those family camping trips together? We're taking one in a week before Matt moves out. You can still until then, bring your mom with, and we'll try to fix some things."

"Lucille, I don't know," She gnawed on her lip, "Won't my Mom get mad?"

"I'll talk to her," Lucille stood from the couch, "You just need to be around a positive environment right now. I don't like the idea of you sitting around by yourself at home all day."

"As long as nobody else minds."

"I've already talked to Jack," She bent down and kissed Troy on the cheek, followed by Gabriella, "Now it's getting late so I'm going to bed. See you two in the morning." She pointed to Gabriella, "Especially you."

Gabriella could hear the music coming from his bedroom as she walked past it in the hallway. It wasn't excessively loud to the point that she could tell what it was until she got closer and pressed her ear to the door. His Coldplay playlist was on repeat.

She cracked open the door to say him laying back down on the floor, legs together, and arms tight at his side, palms facing the floor. His eyes were closed and his breathing shallow.

During their Freshman year of high school the sex education classes had gone under the criticism of some parents, leading to a school board dispute. So instead of their regular health classes, the school had hired some a young hippie to teach meditation on the mats in the wrestling room. Most of the students considered it nap time.

Troy had taken a liking to the class. Whatever the hell she'd taught them about listening to their blood flow through their body and visualization had actually helped in some way. Sometimes he'd turn up his music and make himself comfortable for twenty minutes before a big game or when he was up late studying for finals.

Gabriella sat and waited until the playlist came to an end. Her wet hair was beginning to dry and curl. When it did end, she waited until he became oriented again and coughed into her arm to gain his attention.

"I didn't even hear you come in," Troy kept his seat on the floor.

"Good," Water dripped from her hair and absorbed into the sheets covering the bed, "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

She tugged at a thin sheet, "That night that I fainted, how come you didn't come over."

Troy picked at the carpet on the floor, "I was mad at you."

"I know but," She stopped her sentence, "I still thought."

"Thought what?"

"I was waiting for you," Gabriella stared at her crossed legs.

"Gabriella," He ran a hand through his hair and rested his head on his palms, "Don't tell me that. It makes me feel like shit."

"I'm not trying to make you feel bad," Her hands traveled over the smooth sheets, "I just wanted to know."

"I don't understand it," He shook his head, "I don't understand how you can hate your body so much to the point where it's making you sick."

"I thought you gave up on me," She focused her eyes out the window on the sun beating down on the dry grass.

"I want to say I didn't," Shame covered Troy's face, "But I didn't know what to do anymore."

"I'm sorry," A tear trickled down her cheek, "I shouldn't have made you keep it a secret."

Troy shook his head, "I should've told somebody."

"It wasn't your problem to deal with though."

"Sometimes I look at you and see someone I don't know," He ran his hand through his hair again, "Everything's changed so much and I can't keep up, but some of it's good, right?"

"Some of it's very good," She smiled, pushing herself up from the and sitting back down next to him. Her cheek rested on his shoulder.

"Mmm," He wrapped his left arm around her back, squeezing her close. He kissed the top of her head, "I'll never give up on you."

So it's been a while. I've had a little bit of a rough time lately and I feel myself opening blank pages to write and just staring at them. Since I hold this story so close to my heart, it's been pretty hard to write and convey what I want.

But anyway, I appreciate everyone who reviews. I've been getting great output on this story recently.