A/N: I do apologize for the huge delay. My computer is ill. You can read my rant about it on my DeviantArt profile. I'm using my old derpy one for now.

Just a warning: This chapter is a bit rough in terms of subject matter.

Chapter 9

If there was one thing the Shumi people really liked, it was textures. Every single person in the village had a purpose and occupation, most of them being master craftsman of varying wares. Clothes making, jewelry making, decorations for homes, carpentry, metalworking, sculpture, anything anyone could possibly need or want, the Shumi people could probably make. They would sit around all day doing their craft and being productive. Because of that, they held their hands in high regard and kept them covered when not working; as they considered it rude to expose such valuable body parts willy nilly. Even the fieldworkers and fishers were considered masters of their craft.

Knowing this, Leon was very apprehensive as to what the people's reactions would be when he and Reno needed to change. The redheaded Carrier didn't give two shits about who saw him wandering around, suddenly a thousand pounds heavier. He was well received, and the people came to him to touch his mane and feel his hide, marveling at the texture. Leon, on the other hand, tried to keep it to himself. He picked a secluded delta that he found didn't get much foot traffic and hung around on the tiny dock there, sticking his feet in the water. He wasn't ashamed of what he was, but he didn't feel the need to proclaim it, either. He was different enough already, living in a village full of alien-like people. But he try as he might, he was found, as he hoped he wouldn't be.

"Ah!" someone startled, pulling the Carrier's attention to the delta's narrow entrance.

Oh great, he grumbled to himself. Please don't molest me.

"I haven't seen one like you in quite some time!" the Shumi proclaimed, setting its fishing equipment down and stepping to him. It bent down and stuffed its noodle fingers in his mane and felt around, a look of adoration in its eyes. Leon was skeptical.

Like me?

"It must have been close to ten years ago. A little less, maybe. She was as black as night and tried to hide herself as well. Such a wonderful woman; very kind," it said, keeping his face up with a hand under his chin, the other hand petting him affectionately. "You're much bigger. Different, yes, but similar as well."

Oh. Probably Tifa.

"You don't need to hide yourself. You're welcome to walk around. I'm sure everyone would like to see you."

That's exactly what I was trying to avoid.

"Come with me, yes?" it asked. Leon made no move to get up, even as the Shumi stood and started walking off the dock. It stopped and looked to him. "No?" it asked. The cat resituated his positioning to lying flat with his chin between his front paws, getting comfortable where he was, hoping the message was clear.

Just leave me be, please.

"I wish you weren't so shy. There is nothing to be ashamed about," it said with a tiny sigh and a frown. Leon didn't deny the Shumi's sincerity, but parading himself around like a spectacle wasn't exactly appealing to him, even if the feedback was positive. It was bearable if they came to him, but he sure as hell wasn't going to go to them. So, he didn't move. The Shumi eventually gave in, took its fishing supplies, and left him.

Leon wasn't there to make friends. He was comfortable around the Shumi enough to be civil and adopt their ways of doing things, but he really didn't want to develop relationships with any of them, or Reno, for that matter. Not only was it a distraction, but it would make leaving again just that much more difficult. He already liked being outside and amongst the grasses and plants enough as it was, and the facility back home looked like a veritable prison at this point, so adding relationships to miss just made the problem worse. Be that as it may, he couldn't deny that he was hurting himself. It was a lonely way of living, and it picked at him. He wanted something more permanent though, like a family, something he wouldn't have to say goodbye to in twenty years.

A hugely fat fish swam right up to the end of the dock and hovered in the water right below where his feet were dangling over the edge. He was surprised, and raised his head off the wood just enough to see it better. It was practically staring at him. He quickly reached over the edge and stuck his foot in the water, claws out and ready to snag it. Its gills got caught on the pointy appendages, but it thrashed around trying to get away. He stuck his other paw in, trying to grab it, fumbling around as water sprayed in every direction. He got a good grip in one side of it and used his paw to push it against the nearest pylon to hold it in place. He squashed it against the pillar and dug his claws in as much as he could, scooting himself around as much as he could for stability. His judgment of how close he was to the edge of the dock was off and his back foot slipped, sending him into the water. It didn't matter, he still had the fish stuck to his foot, and he rolled over, bringing it to his mouth so he could keep it as he paddled to the shore, just a few feet away.

"That is a huge fish! Holy shit!" Reno blurted abruptly, startling the cat a bit. Leon dropped the fish on the grass and let it waggle around helplessly. He shook the water from himself, sending a spray in all directions. The redhead waited until he was finished before approaching. "I can't believe you caught that thing with your face. That's awesome," he said happily.

Not quite my face, but whatever, Leon sighed. The fish flopped around, inching back towards the water. He pushed it farther inland.

"Anyway, I heard rumors that you were being dumpy and depressed and I was asked to help."

I wasn't aware I asked for help, Leon thought. A sudden strong tickle prodded the inside of his nose and he sneezed, twice, removing the water the fish had flung up his nostrils. He ignored Reno and lay in the grass next to his catch, waiting for it to burp up a wisp, signifying it was thoroughly dead.

"Don't ignore me," Reno protested. He stared at the cat with a scowl as Leon continued to do just that. The redhead wasn't happy. He was starting to take Leon's prickly demeanor personally. He had never had someone flat out deny him any sort of simple pleasantry. The brunette didn't even say 'good morning' to him on most days, let alone be willing to have an extended conversation with him. He waited, trying to be patient just in case Leon decided he wanted to be nice. After a few minutes, it was clear he wasn't wanted. He heaved a little sigh and left quietly.

Anna registered as she was ordered to. Leon missed the part where the couple left the house together, but he was there for when they came back. The woman was in tears, clutching her forearm and whimpering nonsense to Aïr as the man hobbled to the sofa. She sat with him and leaned against his side. He held her close and rested his cheek against her hair. Leon skittered his camera up for a better vantage point. He peered over her shoulder and was taken aback. In the dimness of the hovel he couldn't tell exactly what had been done to her, but it certainly looked painful.

"It hurts so much…" Anna sniffled. She had a barcode on her wrist like one would find on a product in a store. It looked like it had been tattooed on her skin, but judging by how upset she was, Leon thought there was more to it. The skin was raw and there were trickles of dried blood seeping out from the bottoms of the bars and down her arm.

"Lay with me," Aïr said, expression distant. Anna nodded and stood, allowing the man to turn sideways and prop his bad leg up. She gently straddled his waist and lay on top of him, resting her head on his chest. Her damaged arm dangled off the side of the sofa, and Leon was able to inch close to see just what the problem really was. He was horrified.

The tattoo wasn't anything of the sort. Thin metal rods had been lodged under the first few layers of the woman's skin. The area was irregularly raised, not all of the rods being the same depth. Leon couldn't decide what was worse. The idea that it was done to begin with, or the possibility of fatal harm being done to Anna had the person who had done it pushed one in too deep. He desperately wanted to understand the reasoning behind such terrible methods, but he wouldn't be able to see it for several more months, when Anna gave birth.

"This is really the only thing I dislike about Midgar," she mumbled quietly. Aïr nodded, running his fingers through her hair.

"It's a necessity. It's what keeps us free," he said.

"I know, but I still don't like it."

"I still think you should leave."

"I'm not going anywhere without you," she said sternly. She sniffled again, obliterating any sort of fierceness her tone may have had. He hugged her then, burying his face in her hair, eyes squeezed shut tightly. She tried her best to hug him back without hurting her arm. They were silent for a few minutes. Aïr eventually let her go and sighed.

"Did you want some? To take away the pain?" he asked. Anna propped herself up on his chest with her elbow and looked thoughtful. She sniffled again and nodded, scooting off of him and making her way to the kitchen. Leon was all too familiar with what they were doing at this point. He heaved a heavy mental sigh when he saw Anna pull out the jar of Mako and a syringe. The only syringe. The one they shared, which was an awful thought in of itself, but coupled with the disgusting sludge they injected themselves with, it was a nightmare. He hated it, and closed his computer, not wanting to watch.

It was a common trend between the couple. A cycle they followed almost as if they were robots programmed to do certain things when they felt a certain way. If either of them was depressed or in pain, they'd shoot up and forget it all. God forbid either of them left the house, then they'd usually end up having rampant sex with someone the hardly knew, instead of each other, but those instances weren't as prevalent. Mostly, it was just them. Together, lost in a world of inebriated bliss. The habit kept up, even as Anna's pregnancy proceeded, seemingly healthily. Leon had mixed feeling about the whole thing, sort of hoping that the child wasn't Cloud, based on how much damage the woman probably caused herself.

One thing he did find out, was that he was watching Anna specifically. She was indeed Cloud's mother. He thought himself rather clever in how he discovered it. He waited until she went shopping, leaving Aïr behind, and told the camera bug to find it's target. It left the house, looking for her instead of staying behind with Aïr. The Carrier caught up with her in a sort of open marketplace, where vendors were showing their wares at rickety tables and stands. He was fascinated at how the people there simply picked what they wanted and took it. The merchants would just have them sign a book, for keeping inventory, and they'd be sent on their way.

No one tried to take more than what they needed. It was strange that there was no currency being exchanged but the lack of selfishness and thievery was probably what perplexed Leon the most. Soldiers actively patrolled the streets, checking women for registration barcodes and keeping things in order, but even then, they seemed unconcerned with the marketplace. It was fascinating, but not what he was there for. Anna moved quickly for a woman in the later stages of pregnancy, and found what she needed, tucked it in her bag, and left. The Carrier hitched a ride on the hem of her pant leg.

They were several doors down from the house when there was a commotion in between a couple of the shacks that pulled Anna's attention away. She stopped and peeked around the side where there was a soldier having some degree of difficulty manhandling a woman. Or rather, a young woman. She couldn't have been older than fifteen or sixteen and the soldier was looked to be well into his forties. His eyes were shining a bright blue, as the trend seemed to dictate, and she was trying to pull away from his grabbing hands, yelling and screaming at him to let her go. He didn't, and she eventually gave in. He raped her in plain sight of all passerby's. People stopped to watch like Anna had, and didn't leave until he was finished with her, leaving her in a sobbing heap on the dirt pathway.

What the fuck is wrong with these people? Leon asked himself. The whole society confused him to no end. There was hardly any evidence of petty crime or personal strife between the people. No one argued very much and they all seemed to be rather polite. But the severity of the crimes that did happen weren't even reacted to. Rape wasn't something anyone but the victim seemed to care about. Women would go out, high off their gourd, and sleep with whoever they pleased, but no arguments broke out of her household afterward. Men too. They would just up and grab a woman they decided they wanted and bend them over wherever was most convenient. It was appalling, but so interesting. Like a train wreck. He couldn't help but watch, even though the scene was horrifying.

Leon's cameras didn't leave the house much after he saw the rape. He was a little shaken, but he mostly felt helpless. He wished he had been there in person and had helped the girl instead of acting like the rest of the people there had. Just watching. That's what Aïr did. He watched with a sort of blank air about him whenever he went out. He didn't get very far on most days and ended up in front of the television again after only a short while. The newscasts and programs on the shiny box weren't much better. All of it was normal to them, but so alien to Leon. He couldn't process it.

The worst instance of Midgar's twisted society came when it was time for Anna to give birth. Now, the woman never had any exams during her pregnancy. No prenatal care, no vitamins, no ultrasounds. The only thing she was given was a scheduled induction when she was registered. She and Aïr set out for the hospital early that morning, the man taking his time walking with her. For Leon, whose camera was hitching a ride on their 'just in case' bag, it was a grueling four hours of nothing. His nerves were shot by the time they finally made it, having gotten jittery right when he woke up with them. He had to time it right and sleep during the day and wake up at six in the evening or so, to make up the time zone difference.

I'm such a wreck, I really need to calm down, he told himself as he sat on his bed, chewing on the inside of his lip in anticipation, staring at the computer screen intently. The hospital room was practically barren of anything aside from Anna's bed, and a few chairs. There were no monitors, no machines, nothing medical, except for a clipboard holding the woman's charts. At the very least it looked like a normal hospital on the surface. It was clean and sterile, mostly white and a pastel green. The doors slid into the walls like the ones in the Shumi village, and there was a phone on the wall next to the bathroom.

"Are you alright?" Anna asked as Aïr dropped himself in a chair heavily with a grunt.

"I will be in a little bit," he said, struggling to keep his voice even and his face neutral. His pain was obvious as he gingerly moved his infected leg around, trying to find a position that lessened the feeling. Anna frowned and rubbed his shoulders.

"We'll be home by tonight," she said, sounding a bit sad.

So quickly? Leon questioned.

"It can't come soon enough," Aïr said spitefully. The woman nodded and kissed the top of his head before going to her bed and sitting on the side. They waited quietly for twenty minutes or so, which felt like a lifetime to Leon.

"Hello in here," a nurse, dressed in white, abruptly said as the door popped open. Anna startled some but kept her eyes glued to the floor. Three men followed the nurse inside. Two were normal soldiers, like the Carrier had seen patrolling the streets, the other looked much more important. He was dressed relatively the same as the other two but with silver adornments dangling off oversized metal shoulder pads. There was a very obvious sword hanging off his belt with elaborate silver scrollwork on the scabbard. The biggest difference in his clothing was the addition of an oversized pair of bangles on his wrists.

They stuck out at least an inch all the way around the man's wrists and held what Leon could only describe as engorged marbles. They were mostly green and blue, but one was red. The Carrier was intrigued. Before he could get in for a closer look, the man nudged the couple's bag across the room with his foot, taking Leon's camera along with it. Then he crossed back to the door and took Anna's chart from the little cubby it was sitting in and flipped through the papers. Everyone was quiet as he read.

"Your first?" he asked, voice deep and commanding. Anna flinched, didn't look at him, but nodded. "You're fully aware of the procedure then? You have no choice in the matter if you want to remain a citizen, it's best if you know how to handle yourself."

"Yes sir. I understand," she said quietly, eyes watering. Leon scowled, as did Aïr.

"Good. I don't want any problems," the man said and handed the chart off to the nurse before going to take a seat. The other two soldiers took their places on either side of the door, stone-faced.

He's not going to stay in there with them, is he? Leon questioned, his stomach twisting a bit. The nurse left them quickly. The air in the room was tense. The man dug in his pocket and pulled out a tiny personal computer and tugged a stylus from the top of it before poking at the screen. Leon didn't care enough to sneak up and look over his shoulder to see what he was doing. Instead, he made the camera inch itself up the wall and take roost in the corner with the best vantage point of Anna's bed. The nurse came back, pushing a cart with another woman following her close behind.

"Lie down, it's time to start," the nurse said, nudging Anna back. She obeyed and lay back quietly, propping herself up on her elbows. The nurse took little time in yanking her walking shorts down, causing Anna to yelp in surprise and try to cover herself. The man with the bangles paid no attention to the goings on and continued to fiddle with his device. The new woman, the doctor, was pushing supplies around on the cart. No one made a move to give Anna a blanket or anything to offer her some decency. The doctor came to Anna's side and took her arm. She quickly injected something in her before letting her go. Aïr, eyes dark, scooted his chair closer to Anna's side. The nurse and the doctor started up some causal conversation between themselves, the pregnant woman ignored.

Anna's labor wasn't gradual. No one checked to see if she had dilated or hooked her up to anything that could monitor her progress. Leon was appalled. The contractions, and subsequently the pain, smacked into her practically all at once, causing her to tense up and scream. Aïr was her only comfort when she broke out in tears and sobbed about how much she wanted it to stop. He held her hand in his, letting her squeeze it as much as she could and used his free one to wipe her brow when it broke out in a sweat. The only time anyone paid attention to her was when the baby started to crown. The doctor unceremoniously shoved her legs up by the bottoms of her feet and the nurse held them in place.

Blood seeped out from Anna at a steady pace, soaking the bed under her. The woman was screaming at the top of her lungs with the immense pain that no one else seemed to be concerned with. Except Aïr, his brows were knitted together worriedly as he tried to support Anna as much as he could. Leon stared, mouth agape, at the scene. The cruelty was something he couldn't even conceive. From start to finish, the labor lasted barely forty-five minutes. The doctor scooped the infant up quickly and wrapped it up once the umbilical cord was cut. The man with the bangles stood from his seat once the baby was out and forcibly took the child from her. He unwrapped and inspected the child as it wailed away before taking it to one of the soldiers by the door and handed it off.

Leon was speechless. The baby wasn't Cloud. It was a girl.

"Burn it," the man said.

"WHAT?" Leon screamed at his computer in utter shock. He watched the soldier take the infant quietly, expressionless. The soldier saluted and left, the cries of the child silencing when the door slid closed again. Anna was practically catatonic, pale as snow and breathing shallowly. Aïr had his eyes squeezed shut, his face turned away, and was still holding Anna's hand tightly. The woman blinked at the ceiling blearily, her legs splayed open, bleeding onto the bed. The sides of the mattress were dripping onto the floor.

"I expect to see you back here by this time next year, or sooner," the man with the bangles said. He approached the bed and looked at his wrists. He chose one of the oversized marbles and pressed it inward. With a quick flick of his hand he spun the bangle like a wheel, the colorful balls blurring together as they started to glow. He held his hand out over Anna's face. Pale greenish tendrils inched down from his fingers, the same ones that came from the dome of glass during the evening ceremonies in the village. Leon couldn't believe what he was seeing as the tiny strings and wisps snaked their way up Anna's nostrils and into her mouth. Her breathing regulated itself, her color returned, and any sort of traumatic tearing her genitals suffered all but disappeared. Aïr sat back, his face downtrodden, but no longer worried. In a matter of minutes, Anna was sitting up again.

"What happens if I can't?" she asked, her voice sounding normal, even toned, like none of it happened. The Carrier was flabbergasted.

"Then we come get you," the man responded. He dug in his pocket for his tiny computer again and poked at the screen again. He took Anna's arm with her registration barcode and held the device over her skin. A blue line appeared over the bars and there was a 'beep.' He let her go and typed away again.

"I meant if I can't conceive again by then," she said, blankly looking at her arm.

"Call us in a few months if nothing happens. We'll send someone else to you that may be a bit more… potent," the man said casually, as if a man's potency was the only problem. Nevermind how the woman's uterus had suddenly been fitted with an auto-eject button with whatever drug the doctor had given her. Aïr looked off to the side, eyes shameful. "Let's hope for a son next time, yes?"

"Yes sir," Anna said quietly. She scooted off the bed and sat on the arm of Aïr's chair, allowing the nurse and the doctor to change the bed sheets and to wipe off the plastic under-pad.

I don't… understand… what just happened? Leon trailed mentally, unable to voice his confusion. He held his head with hands on either side of his temples, fingers gripping his hair tightly. His entire perception of Biology and Physics was just slashed to pieces, not to mention the severe ethical problems he was having. He felt dizzy.

"I'm sorry I failed," Aïr said hoarsely, watching the man with the bangles closely.

"It happens. Be more careful," he said. The other nodded. The soldiers took their leave then, without so much as an explanation. Anna and Aïr seemed to understand, which didn't help Leon in the least. The nurse and doctor left a few minutes later. Anna went to clean herself up and get dressed again. Then the couple sat together quietly for what seemed like ages.

Say something. Tell me you're human, Leon silently begged them. The lack of emotion was unsettling.

"That wasn't so bad," Anna blurted after a while. The Carrier balked. Aïr didn't say anything. She looked at him. "What's wrong?"

"You sounded like you were dying," he said hesitantly.

"But I'm fine."

"Yeah, only because the Captain healed you."

"Right, and we can try again."

"And if he isn't so giving next time?"

"…I don't think he can do that until I at least give him a son."

Leon couldn't listen anymore. He made the camera crawl back into their bag so it could be taken home with them, but stopped the feed. His hands were shaking as his frazzled brain tried to make sense of what had happened. He missed an evening ceremony anticipating Cloud's arrival and instead, was kicked in the face. His skin was crawling. He had questions. So many questions. He shuffled out of his bed and shakily made his way over to Reno's door. He knocked quietly. The redhead answered quickly.

"Holy shit, what happened?" he blurted in surprise, taking in Leon's hollow expression.

"It wasn't Cloud," the brunette said blankly.

"Well there wasn't anything saying he didn't have siblings, was there?"Reno asked. Leon shook his head.

"He still doesn't."

"…I don't get it."

"His sister is dead."

"Stillborn?"

"No, probably tossed in an incinerator like a piece of garbage," Leon said. Reno furrowed his brows.

"That's not funny, don't joke like that."

"I'm not. I wish I was."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously."

"Wait, I need you to explain better," the redhead said, stepping aside and letting the other come in his bedroom. Reno's computer was open and broadcasting Rude's parents working together in their blacksmith shop. Leon was immediately envious of the normalcy. He sat on the edge of the redhead's bed and regurgitated the entire story back to him. Having to repeat it all and really think about all the details got him even more upset. He kept his gaze low, staring down at the lines in his palms, as the jitters sped up and made his eyes water.

"…She looked perfectly healthy but they just tossed her away because she wasn't male. I mean, maybe they saw something I didn't and she wouldn't have survived, but they kept saying over and over again 'let's hope for a son,' or 'give a son next time,' like that was the whole point. I don't know…" he trailed sadly, quiet tears dripping off the end of his nose. "Maybe it hurts me more because the females are such an integral part of my Totem but… I just couldn't imagine going through all that just to throw away a daughter or sister just because she didn't have the 'right' parts."

"It sort of makes sense though," Reno said, watching the brunette closely. Leon glanced at him, wiping at his eyes.

"How can you say that? It's cruel."

"Well, just because I can understand their mentality, it doesn't mean its okay. Think about it. Midgar is huge. They're a militaristic society for the most part and are trying to fuel an enormous war. Regulating births and population is probably a big part of that. Registering women when they're able to have children and making them keep up production until they get sons is probably a very efficient way of making sure they stay ahead of the game. If families are having a bunch of girls, it distracts them from having more kids, and the probability of more soldiers goes down the tube. If they only draft men, then they need boys to be born. Burning the girls is a bit much though," the redhead explained.

"They could've given her to me. I would've been okay having her," Leon said flatly. Reno smiled.

"That's cute."

"I'm serious. Children aren't tissues."

"I know, but it's still cute. Sorry if I'm being weird but this is the most emotion you've ever shown me, even if the circumstances are awful. I'm happy you're willing to come to me. I thought you hated me."

"'Hate' is a strong word," Leon said, wiping the rest of his face dry. The redhead laughed.

"Can't even give me a little bit of satisfaction?"

"Of course not."

"Right. Silly me," Reno said. A brief silence hung between them.

"I really want to know how Anna could go through all that and just… be healed and walk away from it. That's probably the hardest part to understand. If Midgar has that kind of technology, we should go back home and tell the Technicians and have them come research it," the brunette said.

"Yeah I'm not sure about that one. Maybe that'd be a better question for the Elder or someone who's been around longer than we have."

"Possibly. Was the Elder angry I wasn't at the ceremony tonight?"

"No, I told him Cloud's mom was having the baby."

"Okay."

"You still sound upset. Are you going to be okay?"

"I… yeah. I just want a family so badly… the idea of throwing away one before it even starts is… unthinkable to me. It's scary to think what Cloud will be like being raised in that sort of society. I mean, will he have any respect for women?"

"It's hard to say."

"Believe it or not, Aïr was the most human through all of it and I don't even know if he's Cloud's father. He's not exactly healthy and I don't know how long he'll be around. If he passes and Anna goes to someone else… I think he would've been the only chance at normalcy Cloud would've had. As much as I hate to admit it. Neither of them are high up on my respect list at this point."

"You have to look at it from their perspective though before you discount them. Assuming they were both born into that sort of life, this might be their normal. If you know no other way of life, then why would you think the current one is bad?"

"I suppose. It brings up a good question, though. Why do they think Balamb is so terrible? Is it because they're even crueler or are they just that much different?"

"That's a good point. I'll watch out for some answers for you."

"Yeah. Maybe I should really start paying attention to the news over there."

"Might be a decent place to start," Reno agreed. Leon nodded.

"Anything interesting happening on your end?" he asked.

"Well…" Reno trailed, looking thoughtful. "Rude's dad is renovating a room upstairs and they've been fucking like rabbits."

"…Sorry I asked."

"No no, it's important. I was supposed to come here and wait a couple years before Rude was estimated to be born. It's getting to be around that time, once mom goes through the pregnancy and all that. I'm excited."

"I'm happy for you," the brunette said, though his tone sounded far from it. He was having a difficult time keeping his envy at bay. He felt childish. He did ask, after all.

"Sorry, I'm not trying to brag."

"I know. I'm having a hard time with overall happiness; it's got nothing to do with you."

"Okay…but I'm still glad you came to me."

"Like I have much of a choice."

"Gee, how thoughtful."

"Can't let you win them all," Leon said curtly with a tiny smile in spite of himself.

"I won something?"

"You rationalized it all for me. So yes, you did win a little."

"Oh. Awesome," Reno twittered with a wide smile.

Leon spent a good portion of the next day spewing the story to the Elder. With a bit of sleep and a warm shower to calm him, he handled it much better. The Elder sat with him and quietly absorbed the entire tale, frowning in all the appropriate places. The Carrier spent as little time as possible explaining the birth process and dwelled on the puzzling healing afterward. When he was finished, the Elder took a minute to mull the information over.

"What you explained to me is commonplace. Especially in places like Balamb," it said. Leon's eyes widened in partial shock.

"Really?" he asked in utter disbelief. The Elder nodded.

"The Lifestream is in everything, you must remember. It is life itself. There are people in this world that can use it to manipulate the elements around them, Balamb being one of the most prevalent in the natural way of doing it. What you described to me sounded much like Midgar's way of manipulation and use of what is called Materia. Materia are sort of like their power plants. Where Balamb takes the energy from the earth to use and gives it back soon after, Materia does it the same way but keeps it locked within itself until it is used. As far as I'm aware, Midgar doesn't rely on the elements as much to fight though; they use brute force and their twisted soldiers. As such, I suspect this 'Captain' was given the privilege to use the Materia versus equipping every soldier with them. It would be a waste to do it otherwise with the death toll."

"But… people in Balamb just do it at will? How… I don't…" Leon trailed stupidly, unable to wrap his head around the concept.

"It takes a lot of training to do it properly without hurting yourself. Healing energy is the most difficult because it is the only kind that transfers. It doesn't return to the earth because the person receiving it holds onto it to use. It stays with them until they die. There are schools that teach the craft. Have you paid close attention to your paperwork?" the Elder asked. Leon furrowed his brows.

"Uh… which part?"

"Did you read anything about Balamb Garden?"

"…I think so. It sounded like some fruity housing development," he blurted. The Elder didn't catch the innuendo.

"It's one of the schools I was talking about."

"So I have to learn how to do this stuff?" Leon asked, his apprehension evident.

"We've tried to teach your kind the skills before and only a few have been able to have any marginal success. We're unsure if it's because you're not from here, or if it's your physical makeup that makes it so much more difficult but we're willing to try and train you. We have a few teachers and scholars here who have the gift, but it may not work with you."

"Why do you say that?"

"I'm not trying to be negative, Squall, but your demeanor doesn't lend me to believe otherwise. I've noticed how unresponsive you are during the evening ceremonies and your almost debilitating need to have an explanation and a reason for everything. Which is a good thing from a knowledge standpoint, but you don't give me the impression that you're capable of looking past that and can step into the realm of pure belief. These abilities take a lot of faith in the spirit of this planet and if you can't accept it and move past your doubt, you won't get very far."

"…Oh," Leon deadpanned.

"That's not to say you can't be successful at Balamb Garden. It's a military school regardless of what ability you have and though you may not end up being the most proficient in the craft, your strength will make you a valuable asset anyway. It's something to consider. You have the compassion in you to get upset over a loss of a life that has nothing to do with you. That's part of taking the first step. Life giving energy is the most difficult to master but it's also the most basic, because that's the Lifestream in its simplest form. If you can learn to hang onto that compassion and put it towards everything else, there is hope," the Elder said with a warm smile.

The Carrier didn't know what to think. He had mixed feelings. The desire to know how it all worked was dwarfing his confidence in his ability to let it all slide and take everything at face value. He would have to put aside everything he learned, everything he stressed and lost sleep over, and step into territory he didn't even know existed before coming to Plane 087. Physics, Biology, Chemistry, possibly even some basic Mathematics would all be warped just so he could have the opportunity to try and heal someone with his touch. He was skeptical. His knowledge base and the cold hard logical facts were what helped him keep control of things.

And control was the most important thing.