Chapter 10

Clarke's heart was heavy as she walked away. It was like looking at things from the other side of a mirror. She remembered how it felt to be the one that was left behind, to watch someone she cared about walk away and leave her when she needed her the most. She wanted nothing more than to turn around and help her friend, but she couldn't. She just couldn't take that responsibility again. It would break her even more than she already was. She regretted ever letting the young grounder into her life. It would have been better if she had just kept to herself. It would have been better if she had never allowed herself to care about anyone again, but she had. She loved Emilee, the other girl had become her best friend and her family. She needed her friendship. She suddenly dropped to her knees as she was overcome with emotion, startling the horses with her actions.

"I'm so sorry Emilee." The tears flooded her vision as she knelt in the snow.

Emilee wished that Clarke had come with her but she understood the need for her to not become involved. She could never hold that against her friend, it would be selfish of her and she cared about the sky girl more than that. The latest reports had said that the bandits were days north of them, yet here they were attacking her village. The village warriors were slightly outnumbered since so many had left with the General. Had the bandits been watching? Did they wait for the moment when they were most vulnerable to attack? Emilee didn't have much time to think about it as she drew nearer to the fighting. She could see dead lying on the ground, both her people and bandits. She drew her sword and headed straight towards the nearest enemy that she saw. The man was pulling his sword out of the back of one of the young warriors. It was a boy that Emilee had watched grow up into a strong fighter during her years at Knoxville. He was only a little younger than herself. She raised her sword and swung out at his killer. Her blade cutting him across the ribs and then plunging into his heart as he turned towards her. She watched as he fell and his blood spilled out onto the already reddening snow. She quickly looked around and headed towards the next enemy she could find. She worked her way closer into the fray, her sword rising and falling as she cut through as many attackers as she could. She saw her friend Tobi. Tobi ran a shop next to hers where he made and repaired clothing and weapons. He had been the first friend she had made when she first settled in Knoxville. He was currently surrounded by three bandits, blood was flowing from a deep wound on his upper arm. She quickly pulled a dagger from her waist and threw it at the one that was approaching him from behind. Then she ran and swung at one of the remaining two. When both were lying on the ground Tobi turned and looked at her.

"They came out of nowhere. They swarmed the gate." Tobi pointed through the smashed gate and the fierce fighting taking place within the village walls.

"Let's go." Emilee said as she stooped down to grab her dagger then took off running with Tobi following right behind her.

The two fought next to each other watching the other's back. Neither side seemed to be gaining any ground. Emilee's arm was growing tired but she kept on fighting. She drew her dagger across the throat of another that she had knocked down to the ground. As she straightened up she felt a sharp pain in her side. She turned raising her sword only to have it knocked out of her hand. A giant fist swung out at her. It connected with the side of her head and sent her crumbling to the ground. Her head was ringing and she tried to focus on the bandit that was standing over her. She threw the dagger she still held and saw it bounce off the metal plate that covered his chest. She tried to look around for her sword but she was losing her battle with consciousness. She fought desperately to shake the stars from her vision, but she could feel the darkness closing in around her. Her last thoughts were that at least she died honorably, protecting her village and how she hoped that Clarke would be ok. She heard a loud noise and then nothing else.

Tobi saw Emilee fall and tried in vain to reach her. He just couldn't gain the upper hand on the enemy that he was currently engaged with. He was finally able to knock his opponent to the ground and turned towards his fallen friend. He knew he wouldn't make it in time as he saw the raised sword begin its way downward. He ran anyway, at the very least he would avenge his friend. He heard an unfamiliar sound and saw the big burly man jerk backward as if he had been hit but there was nobody in front of him. Another sound and the man fell backwards to the ground dead, blood appearing from a small hole in the center of his forehead. Looking around Tobi saw a warrior that he did not recognize. A young girl about his age. He recognized her cloak, although he hadn't ever really seen her up close before and never without the hood covering her head and leaving her face in shadow. The cloak he remembered belonging to the mysterious newcomer he had seen walking through the village with Emilee. He saw the golden hair that framed her pale face. She held a bloody sword in one hand and a small black object in the other. The look on her face was one to be feared. It was full of fury and her blue eyes seemed to burn brightly with an unseen fire. Tobi unconsciously took a step backwards. The ferocious blonde rushed to the fallen girl and after making sure she was still alive she turned towards him.

"Keep her safe." That was all she said in a husky voice before darting off.

Tobi watched her for a moment as she pointed the black object again and again. Each time an enemy dropped to the ground dead. She placed the object under her cloak and pulled another sword from her back. The fire never leaving her eyes as she attacked. Tobi, unsure of exactly what he was seeing, focused his gaze down on his fallen friend. He took off is jacket and tore some strips of cloth off of the shirt he wore underneath and wrapped them around Emilee's middle where she had been stabbed.

Clarke's vision was red as she swung and chopped at the bandits around her. She didn't see the look of fear on the faces of them or of the villagers around her. She simply cut down one target and then focused on the next until there was none left. Her presence had brought about a renewed sense of hope and energy to the villagers as they refocused their attention on their attackers driving them back. Clarke looked around and saw the remaining bandits scrambling out the gates. Her heart was pounding in her chest. She gulped in huge amounts of air trying to clear her head from the battle haze that had taken over her. She looked around at the surprised villagers that could only stare at her with looks of disbelief on their faces. She saw the fallen all around her. How many because of her hand? How many more to add to the ranks of the dead that followed behind her? Her emotions overwhelmed her and she could feel herself sinking to the ground.

Emilee opened her eyes. She was surprised she wasn't dead. She saw Tobi hovering over her.

"Thank you." She managed to utter.

"It wasn't me." Tobi simply pointed and Emilee was shocked to see Clarke.

Clarke was fighting like something she could never have imagined her broken friend being like. She had witnessed the blonde's skill with the sword grow over their time together and although her swings were still sloppy and unbalanced there was no doubting the ferocity with which she wielded the weapons. The bandits seemed terrified of the sky leader and began running off. The shop keeper couldn't blame them, Clarke looked fierce and very much a force to be reckoned with and the villagers rallied around her with renewed energy. Emilee watched Clarke stop and look around. She knew that Clarke was not ok. She could see the blonde struggling for breath and struggling to stay on her feet. Emilee grabbed on to Tobi and used him to help pull herself up. She ran unsteadily to Clarke and dropped down next to her friend. She could see the dazed and unfocused look in her eyes and could hear her muttering to herself. Emilee moved closer. She could finally make out the words Clarke was saying.

"I am death." The blonde was repeating those words as if it was a sacred mantra.

Emilee moved in front of Clarke and brought her hands up to the sides of her face.

"Clarke. Clarke. I'm here. Clarke, you're ok. I'm here with you. Focus on me Clarke."

It was those same words that brought Clarke out of her nightmares at night that brought her out of the one she was currently living.

Blue eyes focused on the brown ones in front of her. "I killed them. I couldn't let you die, so I killed them."

"You did what you had to do Clarke. You know this."

Emilee pulled Clarke closer to her but the blonde jerked back and shakily stood up. Clarke looked around again. Nobody was moving. They were focused on the strange blonde that had come to their rescue.

Clarke pointed to a group of soldiers. "Go secure the gates." Clarke stood and began walking to an injured villager. "I need cloth for bandages and water. We need to help the wounded and set up guard rotations. If any of the attackers are alive they need to be tied up. Maybe we can get some answers from them."

The fire still burned in her eyes and nobody questioned her. Emilee could see why the warriors had talked of her with such respect when they came back from the mountain. The sky leader held great power, the power of the stars from which she had fallen from in a fiery blaze. She quickly turned and found Kurt. Kurt was a great warrior and had been left in charge of the village during the General's absence. Together they began to reinforce Clarke's orders and helped organize the new tasks.

Finally the wounded had all been cared for and extra guards had been posted to keep watch, who knew if or when the bandits would be back. The village had two healers and they both would be kept busy throughout the night and the next few days taking care of the injured. Emilee made sure that they had people to help them. They had found four of the bandits still alive. One had soon died because of his wounds and the other three had been locked up. Emilee had stayed close to her friend after the battle and had sent someone to get whatever Clarke needed whenever she asked for something. She had watched the blonde work as she set bones, and cleaned, closed and bandaged wounds. Once all the injured had been taken care of, Emilee saw the look on Clarke's face change. The bright blue eyes returned to their usual duller blue. The blonde look exhausted. She let Emilee lead her back to her house.

Clarke sat silently at the table as Emilee prepared some food for them. While it was getting ready she brought a bowl of water and some cloth and began cleaning the blood from the blonde's hands and face. When she was finished she took Clarke's hands in her own.

"Are you ok?"

Clarke gave a slight nod. "Let me see your wound." Clarke had tried taking care of it earlier but Emilee had refused saying that she would be ok and that there were others that needed to be taken care of first. Clarke helped Emilee take her shirt off and carefully undid the blood soaked bandages Tobi had wrapped around her earlier. The wound was big but luckily wasn't very deep, even so Clarke knew that Emilee had lost a lot of blood. There was a huge bump on her head and Clarke was afraid that her friend might have a concussion.

"I never knew you were a healer, Clarke." While they were eating, Emilee had been thinking about the wounded she had watched Clarke help after the battle.

"I wish I knew more. My mom is a doctor, a healer. I used to help her before I was locked up. It was what I wanted to do. I learned a lot from her but I can't even compare to her and the knowledge she has."

"You have a great skill for it." Emilee winced slightly as Clarke prodded around the edges of her cut to check for internal damage. "You have great skills as a leader too."

Clarke didn't say anything as she cleaned the wound and closed it. She was lost in thought as she began to carefully rewrap bandages around the brunette's slim waist.

"She was right." The blonde spoke the words quietly.

She looked up at Emilee as she finished securing the bandage and saw the confusion on her face. "Lexa. Lexa was right. She said that I was born for this, that I was born to be a leader. It doesn't matter that I never wanted to be one. It doesn't matter how much I try to run from it or avoid it. I guess it is who I am. I can't seem to change that. I tried to walk away. I thought I could leave you to die, Emilee. I thought I could just pretend that you didn't mean that much to me. I couldn't do it though, so I turned back. I was just going to make sure you were safe, but when I saw the fighting and the blood on the ground and I couldn't find you it was like something just came over me. I let the monster take over. What kind of life am I supposed to have when I can't help but take care of others? When I have to make decisions I'm not prepared to make, to be something that I don't want to be, and to do things I don't want to do. I'm nothing but a monster and I don't want to be one, but at the same time I just can't help being one."

Clarke shuddered and immediately felt the warmth of Emilee's embrace.

"You're not a monster, Clarke. I hate that you think of yourself that way. You saved me. You saved the village. I can't even imagine what would have happened if you didn't show up. Everyone is so grateful for your help today."

"I'm sure it will only be a matter of time before they start wishing I wasn't here." The tears had started running out of Clarke's eyes.

Emilee sighed and then lifted her hands up to Clarke's face. She cupped a hand on each cheek and wiped away the tears with her thumbs. She knew that she wouldn't win that argument with Clarke so she wasn't even going to try. Choosing to focus on her own feelings instead. "I know that I would never think that and I am so thankful you are here. If you hadn't have come when you did then I know for sure that I would not he here now." With that said she moved one hand down to grab Clarke's and leaned in placing a kiss on her cheek. "Thank you, Clarke. Now come on. Let's try and get some sleep. I'm sure tomorrow will be a busy day."

Clarke allowed Emilee to pull her towards her room where the two got ready for bed. Clarke had felt bad that Emilee ended up leaving her bed every night to console her after her nightmares. Three nights ago she had followed Emilee to her room and had softly explained that she hated dragging the other woman out of her bed and she sheepishly admitted that she didn't want to sleep alone. Emilee had just chuckled and said she didn't mind and that if Clarke wanted to share her bed then that was fine. Once they were settled under the furs Clarke scooted in closer to Emilee's warm side. It had been a very trying day and she needed to feel the calming presence of her friend. She immediately felt the young grounder's arm slide underneath her shoulders, turning the blonde towards her and sliding an arm around her waist. Clarke adjusted her head on her friend's shoulder and wrapped her own arm around Emilee's waist being careful of her wound.

Clarke was tired and fell asleep very soon after lying down. She's been asleep for just over two hours when she found herself struggling to wake up. She had only wanted to sleep for an hour, but her body had other plans. She really was worried that Emilee might have suffered a concussion when she was hit and she had wanted to wake her friend after an hour to make sure that there hadn't been any damage to her brain. She didn't know what she would do if there was. She wasn't prepared to handle anything like that here, but maybe between her and the healers they could figure something out.

Clarke rubbed her hand up and down Emilee's arm. "Emilee." She quietly called.

Clarke called her name several times and received no response. She shook her shoulder a little harder and still nothing. Clarke bolted upright beginning to panic.

"It's ok Clarke. I'm here. It was just a dream." Emilee sat up and wrapped her arms around Clarke as she spoke.

Clarke let out a sigh of relief and then began to laugh. The sound caught both of them off guard. It was the first time Emilee had ever truly heard Clarke laugh.

"What is...I don't under...are you ok?" Emilee's struggle to speak due to her confusion only caused Clarke to laugh harder.

"I'm fine, Emilee." Clarke finally managed to get out. "I was worried about that hit you took to the head today and I just wanted to make sure you were ok. I was just getting worried because I was having a hard time waking you up."

Emilee finally realizing what had happened began to laugh herself as Clarke grabbed a candle from the table by the bed to check her friend's pupils. Satisfied with what she saw she placed the candle back.

"I'll probably wake you in a few hours to check again. For now you should get some more sleep."

"You woke me up to tell me to go back to sleep?"

"Often times head wounds like this can have symptoms that show up hours later and it's best to catch any problems early if there are any. I just want to make sure you are ok." With that said, Clarke laid back down pulling the brunette with her. "Now get some rest. It will help you heal."

Emilee let out another small laugh while placing a kiss on Clarke's cheek before wrapping her arms back around the blonde.

Clarke had woken up once trembling and covered in sweat. Emilee was still asleep and Clarke tightened her hold on her until her breathing returned to normal before she woke her friend up to check on her again.

As soon as she woke, Clarke wanted to go and check on the wounded and see if the guards had anything to report and see if they had gotten any information from the prisoners yet, but Emilee made her eat first. She knew that once Clarke started it would be a while before the sky leader would stop. The two were currently walking to where the prisoners were being held.

Clarke had been deep in thought as they walked and finally voiced her concerns to her friend. "I think that we may have underestimated the bandits. Something isn't right. I think that they have purposely been attacking further away to mislead the army. Those reports all said the same thing about small groups attacking. I think that they either wanted to lead the army away to hit here and possibly other larger villages or they are trying to set a trap for the army. I'm just not sure yet but something really doesn't feel right. They had to have been watching this place. That would explain the timing of their attack and that would mean that their numbers are far greater than anyone thought."

The two approached the building where the prisoners were being held. There were several warriors standing guard outside and with them was Kurt.

"Kurt, this is Clarke of the Skaikru." Emilee formally introduced her friend.

Kurt looked at Clarke and bowed his head in respect taking Clarke aback a little.

"I've tried talking to them but they refuse to say anything."

"One of them must be able to tell us something." The determination was clearly written on Clarke's face as she walked inside the building.

Clarke stopped inside the first room. She could see two warriors guarding a door that led into another room where the prisoners were being held. She turned to Kurt.

"Bring one of them here."

Kurt motioned to the guards and they left the room only to return a moment later with one of the bandits. His hands were tied behind his back. Clarke began walking towards him. The fear was evident on his face as he watched her approach.

A half hour later Clarke, Emilee, and Kurt exited the building. It turned out that the prisoner was very willing to tell Clarke everything. This had surprised by Kurt and Emilee that the man feared Clarke more than he feared death. Clarke's thoughts had been confirmed. The bandits had sent two small groups north to lead the Commander's army away while they attacked Knoxville. Their main camp was a days walk northwest of the village. There was a small pass that lead to it and they had planned on drawing the main army back that way and ambushing them. Their numbers were indeed far greater than anyone had thought. Nearly 500 in total.

Clarke turned towards Emilee. "Do you have maps of the area he was talking about?"

Emilee nodded.

"Kurt, send your fastest riders to the army. Have them tell Indra that it is a trap and that they should return here so we can regroup and plan."

Kurt nodded and set off immediately to the task.

Clarke and Emilee were standing by the table in her house. The surface was covered with a map. Clarke had been studying it for the last hour.

"What are you thinking Clarke?"

"I think we should set out tomorrow to scout the area where their main camp is. We need to see if what we were told is true and to see if there is a way to take them out."

"You plan on going yourself?" Emilee was concerned for her friend.

Clarke sighed. "What other choice is there? I'm a part of this now and I will do what I can. They have to be stopped. Once Indra arrives with the army we should be able to take them out, but we need to have a plan ready."

Emilee placed a hand on Clarke's arm. "Are you ok with this? You know some of these people. Are you ready for them to know you're here?"

Clarke sighed heavily. "I don't know if I am or not. One thing at a time I guess. I've always known that I couldn't hide forever and ready or not things are what they are."