Hey everyone! Sorry that this update has taken so long. I don't really know where I was or what I was doing…so thanks to Rai Kane whose message brought me back to my senses!!
There's this song that I've been listening to over and over. If you want to, you should listen to it. It's really beautiful. I listened to it while I read stories and while I was writing this chapter. It's a piano song. I'm going to try and put the link here, but if that doesn't work and you want to listen to it (it's pretty effective to the perception of the story, for me), you can email me.
Well, it didn't work. I'm going to put my email on my profile, so if you like piano music that's pretty moving just email me! I can't stop listening to it.
Thanks to those of you who reviewed last chapter. Feedback on this one would be really appreciated!!
Oh – and some people are confused – this chapter is in Mush's point of view, the first part is from the day before (right when she left), the second part jumps back to where the last chapter left off, when Manny and Pip were having their little reunion.
Hope that helps!
I don't own the newsies.
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MUSH'S POV
I don't think Pip has any idea what the hell we all just went through.
She can't.
I mean, she had no idea where she was going for less than a half an hour yesterday, and then realized that she'd be here. We all had no idea where she would be going for a whole day. It doesn't seem like much, but it sure felt like a lot of time.
The moment she left the square yesterday, I wasn't exactly sure what to do. Actually, the only thing I found that I could do was lean against the wall and focus on my senses. I had to remind myself that everything was normal, that Pippa's departure wasn't changing the entire world. I felt the slight and cool breeze on my skin. The warm rays of the sun kept the coolness in check, though. I felt the ground under my feet and the brick through my clothes. I kept my eyes on the sky. But I kept my ears on everything else.
I heard Jack's breath become sharper. I heard Race's weak, "Christ." I heard Manny drop to the ground and in the corner of my eyes saw his head in his hands. I even heard the sound of papers being sold at the DO and the slight click of change being dropped on the counter.
I heard Jack suddenly make a break for it and shifted my eyes to watch a couple newsies move to hold him back. He struggled, and I saw the despair and fear in his eyes. "She's my sistah!" He said, over and over again. "My sistah!"
No she's not. I wanted to scream this at Jack. She's just your pretend sister.
Spot suddenly came from around a corner; a different one from the one Pip'd disappeared around. He'd sort of fast walked in, but the moment he stepped into the square he halted, narrowed his eyes, gave a quick glance around, and then gave a tight nod. I heard him mutter some curse.
"She gone?"
Someone must've nodded.
"Gutter," Spot said quietly but fiercely.
Some short kid who'd come in behind Spot took off. Probably one of his birds.
There was a silence. One which greatly reminded me of the night when Pip went missing so long ago. And even though this was different, it was still so much the same…
Before, we didn't know that Pip was gone, leaving. Now, we do. I guess the thing that makes them similar is the fact that we don't know where she's going now. The sense of helplessness, confusion, and anxiety is pretty much the feeling which was present a few years ago.
Jack was calming down now. I couldn't even look at him though; he was making me so mad for some reason.
Suddenly Manny stood up, grabbed his papers, and ran. Sad gazes followed him out. No one stopped him. He wouldn't go after her. He thought through things better than Jack did.
I, however, glared around at everyone, who was principally looking around at Jack and Spot. I was feeling such anger right now, at them, for some reason…them being Jack and Spot.
I couldn't take it anymore. Being in a place which reminded me so much of the awful past. I pushed off the wall, put my papers under my arm, and took off, without a second glance.
I needed to also figure out why I was so mad.
I tipped my hat as I passed the girls who were just getting here. I tried to hurry so that I wouldn't hear their disappointment at Pip being gone.
I wasn't fast enough.
--
Jealousy.
That was it.
Kind of a good distraction. But a bad thing.
I was jealous that Spot, Manny, and Jack were seen as the most important guys in Pip's life. And I was kind of nervous.
Were they?
Look at their reactions. Jack tried to go after her. Spot was subdued to silence. Manny couldn't deal being around anyone.
And what was mine? Making sure everything else was okay?
I was real to Pip. Jack and Manny aren't actually her brothers. Spot is supposedly her best friend.
I am actually her boyfriend.
Doesn't that mean something? Like that I should have some sort of other reaction?
I sighed and dropped my still numerous stack of papers to the ground of the dock. I moved to the edge of the dock and sat, my legs dangling over the edge. I watched the water as my hands found tiny rocks and pieces of dirt. I dropped them into the water and let the huge impact they had on the surface of the water dominate my thoughts. The cool sea breeze mixed with the warm sun always finds ways to comfort me.
--
I don't know how much later, but at some point I felt someone sit next to me. I turned my head the slightest bit…and sort of gave a start. A good one.
It was Manny.
My insides sort of melted, with my anger, as I looked at him. He was squinting out at the water, fidgeting horribly.
"How are you doing?" he said.
I smiled at him. Inside I felt shame at his unselfishness, versus my anger. "I'm…doing. You?"
He was quiet for a few moments before answering. "This is the first time I've been without her like this," he said quietly. Then he turned to look right at me. "How do you do it? How'd you deal with it? How are you so calm?"
I gave him a half smile and then looked out at the water. "I'm not calm. I don't deal with it too well. But…just finding something to do, somewhere to be, just helps pass the time."
Manny sighed. "Sorry you had to go through this before."
"That was partly our own fault."
I saw a smile twitch at the corners of Manny's mouth. "Well…partly, it was."
I laughed.
He grinned too. "Sorry…"
"No, you're right."
We sat in silence for a few more moments.
"Being here helps me," I said.
Manny looked at me. "Yeah?"
"Yeah. I don't know why. Just being here…I taught her to swim here...we found out we…well, lots of stuff happened here."
Manny was smiling. "You're the Prince of the Seas, too."
I grinned. "You're the Prince of the Alleys."
"Can I try?"
"What?"
"Being here."
I nodded. "Anytime."
--
Back to the present time, still Mush's POV
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I smiled as I watched Pip and Manny's reunion. He and I had really talked. I'd learned a lot about him, and from him. He's probably the best guy I know.
Pip and I's reunion had been perfect.
Except for this guy. Jack. Pip'd wanted me to be nice, so I'd tried. But it was hard. He was going to know so much more about what Pip was going though at home. But I tried to use what I'd learned from Manny – not be jealous.
It was really hard. I had to say something.
"Listen," I said, turning to him. "I don't know whether to trust you or not yet. I do trust that you know that one false move on your part and you'll have almost all a' New York after ya."
He nodded. His eyes were glued on Pip and Manny – probably Pip though. "I figured," he said. He grinned at me. "Just look at her."
I narrowed my eyes.
"Sorry, sorry."
"She is what you're seeing, but she's so much more," I said carefully.
"I figured that, too."
I sighed. "C'mon."
We moved forward to meet them. The moment Pip's smiling eyes met mine, any anger which had been building up just disappeared.
It's a wonder that Pip and Manny aren't related. They really are so much alike.
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