The Twelfth Lane

A/N: Part of my personal goals lately have been to finish the things I started. I have a bad tendency to get super deep in a story and then full-on ghost it. Writer's block is a fickle bitch, especially when life comes in for a sucker punch right after it. So, rest assured, I fully intend to finish this story, even if it is four years late and generally forgotten about. Hopefully there are still some of you around to enjoy it lol

. . . . . . . . . . . .

Chapter Ten

It was surprising after the exhilarating end of the training camp week how normal things seemed to return to. Summer break ended quickly, sending them all back to the same old routine of going to classes, preparing for festivals and practice. The only difference was that Gou was now a part of a high-profile relay team whose practices ran harder and longer into the evenings than ever before. More often than not, she found herself sprawled across her desk, hardly able to keep an eye open. It wasn't fair for the teachers to throw them so hard back into school work. She needed like ten more weeks of vacation to recover from it all.

But as it was, everything following that week of training was so utterly normal. Wake up, go to class, practice, go home, study, sleep. Day-in and day-out. She knew the routine was a good thing, but she couldn't help but feel antsy. She was already ready to prove herself—obviously she had honed her skills enough to put up a good fight against Iwatobi—but the competition still remained a good two weeks away. The days ticked away slowly, like she was dragging her feet to get there, and she was beyond over it.

"—kun. Gou-kun."

She sat up with a jolt, distractedly swiping the saliva-strewn notes off where they stuck to her face. She stared at the offensive pieces of paper, wondering when she had even fallen asleep. Seijuurou gave a small chuckle from his desk and she blushed in embarrassment, glancing back at him. He leaned back in his chair with a bemused smile.

"Need a break?"

She wiped the saliva from her mouth and gave him a sheepish grin. "I don't know what you're talking about."

He laughed a bit before reaching his arms behind him to stretch his back. Gou watched the way his muscles flexed before he collapsed back in his chair. "Well, I definitely need a break. I can't stare at differential equations any longer."

She watched as he shuffled his papers with extensive math problems worked out across their front. "I don't even know how you can understand that. It practically looks like another language."

"It kinda is, in a way," he responded, tucking his notes into his textbook.

"That's probably why I don't understand it then," she said with a groan. "Why does everything always have to circle back to language?"

Seijuurou smiled and stood from his seat. "I'm headed to the convenience store. You coming?"

The promise of something cool and covered in chocolate was too much of an allure to deny. She practically jumped from her seat, knocking it back. "Yes!"

"Don't seem too excited," he laughed, heading for the door.

She fell in step beside him as they walked down the hallway. It was mostly quiet, aside from a few people wandering down the hall to the vending machines like zombies. It was already after nine at night, and most people had settled in to either finish their work or go to bed. The gates to the dorm closed at ten, so they had a few minutes to stretch their legs before hitting the books again. A few people chatted in the courtyard, joking around and laughing loudly. Gou looked at them fondly as she and Seijuurou headed for the exit.

"It's kinda cool how everybody gets along here," she mentioned. "At my old school, we didn't have a dorm, so kids didn't hang out after school like this."

"Yeah," Seijuurou agreed. "They just built the dorm a few years ago. They had so many students moving here from across the Kansai region that they needed somewhere to put them."

"Makes sense with how prestigious this place is," she said. "All my principal would ever talk about was how we could beat you guys in academics every year. I think he had some sort of vendetta against Samezuka."

He looked over at her in surprise. "For academics?"

"Yeah…" She sighed. "I think he was a super nerd when he was our age, or something. That's the only reason I can think of for why he cares less for athletics. I bet he never participated in a sport in his entire life."

"He sounds like a pain."

They walked past the gates onto the sidewalk, suddenly surrounded by the sounds of the city. Cars drove by on the street next to the sidewalk, and bright lights from the stores lining the way blinked at them. A rush of air from the train leaving the station nearby picked at the edges of Gou's t-shirt and echoed between the buildings. There were few places in Japan that weren't busy in some way or another, but for Gou, she enjoyed the sounds of liveliness. Iwatobi was a little more in the rural part of town than Samezuka was, and she had always enjoyed the busier parts of the city. To her, busyness was like its language, spoken loudly during the day and in a whisper at night. You just had to listen to hear its secrets.

"You know," Seijuurou said, putting his hands behind his head. "The more you talk about Iwatobi, the less I can imagine you being there. It doesn't sound like something that fits your personality."

Gou's worn sneakers crunched small pebbles along the sidewalk as they walked, scraping lines across the cement. "To be fair, I was a different person at Iwatobi."

"I mean, I guess." Seijuurou thought for a minute pressing his lips together.

Gou gave a small smile and locked her hands behind her back. "Back there, I had long hair. All the way to my hips. I wore skirts every day and wouldn't be caught dead in anything baggy. I wore make up. Put ribbons in my hair. Painted my nails." She took a deep breath, remembering all the things she longed to relish in again. "I did everything I could to make sure people knew that I was a girl since my name was so boyish. It's kinda funny how fast I gave all of that up."

"You didn't give it all up," Seijuurou responded. She looked back at him with her brow pulled. "You might dress like a guy and sort of act like one—" Gou rolled her eyes. "But you're still you. And what you wear and how you act won't change that."

Warmth blossomed in her chest and she shuffled a little in embarrassment. How did he always know exactly what she wanted to hear? It was like he could see into her mind and knew exactly what to say to touch her heart.

"Besides," he continued, catching her attention again. She rose an eyebrow at the sheepish look on his face. "It's probably better that I got to know you this way. I tend to act a little stupid around pretty girls."

The statement was so out there and different from the person that she had gotten to know that Gou burst out in laugher. "What?"

Seijuurou frowned, the blush on his cheeks growing darker. "I wish it wasn't true… But I can't talk to girls. I tend to… babble."

"Babble?" Gou laughed again. She could hardly even imagine her cool captain turning into an awkward dork just because he was talking to a pretty girl. It was too much. The thought repeated in her mind and her laugh dwindled off some as a slight pang of disappointment shot through her chest. He seemed perfectly fine talking with her. Maybe it was because he got to know her first and he didn't think of her as a real girl. Would he have babbled if he had met her before?

They slowed in front of the convenience store, stepping to the side slightly to let another pair of Samezuka students walk by. Seijuurou's shoulder bumped against hers and her heart gave a sharp jump. She sneakily glanced up at him to see his expression. He had a casual smile on his face as he lifted a hand to wave at the boys who passed them. Gou looked away. Was she too conscious of him? Sure, he was a good looking guy with a good heart, but was that it? Or did the fact that he knew her secret and stayed in the same room with her make her feel like there was something more between them? It was all a bit confusing and a little disheartening.

She followed him into the store, lingering by the pastry case as he wandered down the aisles. All of the desserts looked so good, she wasn't sure what to choose. Should she pick the chocolate mousse? The strawberry shortcake? The fruit parfait? She mulled in indecision for a few minutes until Seijuurou pulled up beside her, a bottle of Calpis and the newest issue of Monthly Muscle in hand. Her eyes caught on the detailed image of flexed back muscles and her plight was forgotten. Seijuurou followed her gaze and laughed.

"You know, I thought it was a little weird that such a scrawny kid was into bodybuilding," he said, holding the magazine out for her to take. "It makes more sense now."

Gou blushed and flipped through the pages. "I've always admired muscles. I've just never wanted to have any of my own."

"You're a record-breaking athlete," Seijuurou responded, heading for the checkout. "That ship has sailed."

Gou frowned, snatched a shortcake from the shelf, and zeroed in on him. "What do you mean sailed? Are you saying I look like a boy?"

He looked at her, unconsciously giving her a slow once-over. Gou's breath caught, suddenly embarrassed by his careful consideration. He paused somewhere by her face and made a constipated look.

"I'm not really sure how to answer that," he eventually said. "Don't you want to look like a boy?"

Gou opened her mouth to protest before drawing short. Why was she so desperate to get confirmation that she looked feminine? He was right; the whole point of her new look was to look like a boy. It was probably a good thing that she was gaining more muscle. Muscle helped her achieve her goals. Muscle helped her break swim records and stick it to her old principal. But muscles didn't help her gain the attraction of the person she really wanted to look at her as something other than an athlete. Again, her mind was warring with itself, and all the back and forth of her morals were getting exhausting.

Gou kept her thoughts to herself as they paid for their things and started back toward Samezuka. The bell tower in the middle of campus gave a soft series of chimes as the clock hit ten, and they broke into a jog to make it back before the gates slid closed. Back on campus, Gou realized a bit belatedly that she had been too quiet on their return trip, troubled by the thoughts and feelings swirling around in her head. Seijuurou gave her short looks from the corner of his eye, but said nothing as they reentered their shared room. Gou lingered by the door way as he walked back to his desk and lightly placed his things on top of it. After a moment, he gave a quiet sigh and turned back towards her with determined eyes.

"Look, I didn't want to say this because it's really stupid, but sometimes it's easier to think of you as a boy instead of a girl," he said, a slight flush coming across his cheeks. "At least that way, I can talk to you like a normal person instead of making myself look like a fool."

The implication in his words was enough to draw a pleased smile to her lips. Just the idea that he occasionally couldn't help but remember that she was a girl quelled the uncertainty in her heart. He was aware of her. And that was enough.

"Thanks, Seijuurou-kun."

He avoided her eyes, ears still pink, as he settled back into his desk. "Yeah."

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

After Gou's revelation, nothing seemed to change much between them. He still talked to her casually, addressed her familiarly, and drilled her to death in their relay practices. But even between all of the normality, she occasionally caught the slight blush coloring his cheeks at something she would say, or when they walked close together. She was glad to see him paying attention to her, especially since she could hardly help the number of times a day her eyes would wander to find him. It occurred to her only after she openly-stared as he swam a few freestyle laps down the length of the pool that she had never really watched him swim before. He was usually the one who ran the races and recorded the times, but ever since she was promoted to a regular on the first-string relay team, she saw him swim all the time. And, it was clear from the first moment he dove off the starting block that he wasn't the team captain because of his attitude and seniority.

Gou had watched Rin and Haru race freestyle for years and knew every difference between their styles. But while Haru swam like he was born in the water and Rin like he had something to chase, Seijuurou swam with power. Every one of his nicely-toned muscles were used to propel him faster and sleeker through the water. He ate up ground with a languid grace, like he was just casually warming up instead of racing at incredible speeds. She couldn't drag her eyes away from him as he touched the wall, and smiled up at whoever was timing his speeds. She watched as he laughed, brightness lighting up his features as he hefted himself out of the water, beads of liquid dripping down the contours of his muscles. It wasn't until somebody bumped her shoulder that she realized just how blatant her staring really was.

She snapped her mouth closed and turned wide, embarrassed eyes up at Ryuu who leaned against her with his arms folded and his eyes suspiciously turned her way.

"I mean, I know he's awesome and all, but you're not subtle," he told her.

"I-I just—I've never actually seen him swim before," she stuttered in response. "I'm just admiring his style!"

"Uh huh," he said looking back at the captain. "I'm sure that's all you're admiring."

Gou felt her face grow hot and quickly turned on her friend, glaring. "I'm not gay."

His eyebrows shot up a bit in surprise and he lifted his hands against her fury. "I didn't imply that!"

"Yes, you did," she snapped. "And for the record, I'm just grateful that he's done so much to help me out. I couldn't have beaten the fly record without him training me. He's just a good friend and a great captain. I don't have f-feel—I don't like—"

"Hey Gou-kun."

Her throat froze up as Seijuurou waved at her and walked towards them. She could feel Ryuu's burning stare like a hot summer day against the side of her face as she tried to school her features. She didn't dare look at him and confirm whatever he was thinking in that moment. Seijuurou stopped before them with a friendly smile turned Ryuu's way before he addressed her.

"We're about to finish up here. Kobayashi is going to do another time trial, but that's all we've got left," he said, aimlessly pointing with his thumb over his shoulder. "So, if you'd like, you can probably head out early. I know you had that project in history that you were worried about completing." She nodded quickly, not trusting her voice. "Okay then. I'll see you back at the dorm?"

"Sure," she squeaked.

If he noticed how awkward she was acting, he didn't acknowledge it. He merely gave her another smile, patted her on the shoulder and headed back toward the pool. She watched him go, her ears burning in embarrassment. She could already hear all of Ryuu's teasing. She spared a hesitant glance his way and, sure enough, he was nodding like he completely understood.

"Yeah, if I was in your shoes, I'd probably have a crush on him as well," he admitted.

Gou shrank. "I don't have a crush on him."

Ryuu put a hand on her shoulder and lifted his nose in the air haughtily. "I know it's hard to admit the feelings in your heart, but take it from the local romance expert. It's never good to ignore what you're feeling inside. You should tell him."

Her heart gave a hard jump. Panic rose in her heart and she derailed that train fast, scoffing loudly to cover the alarms blaring in her head. "Local romance expert? You don't even have a girlfriend!"

"Irrelevant," Ryuu responded. "Besides, that drought is about to end. I have a date on Saturday!"

"What, with your hand?"

Despite her joking tone, Gou struggled to squash the anxiety bubbling up in her chest at the idea that Ryuu could be onto her. He probably thought she just had a giant gay crush on their captain, which, all things considered, wasn't entirely wrong. But if there was any hint that he suspected that she was a girl—she wasn't sure what to do. Seijuurou was right. She was far too transparent with her thoughts and feelings. She really needed to get ahold of herself. The last thing she needed was to be kicked out of Samezuka just after getting on the relay team

"Har har," Ryuu mocked, rolling his eyes. "I'll have you know, I actually listened to your advice. I gave her the space to figure things out and it worked. She was the one who invited me."

"You listened?" Gou said dramatically. "I didn't even know your ears worked."

Ryuu glared at her before throwing his arm around her neck and drilling his knuckles into her skull. She fought against him, popping out of his headlock with a spin of dizziness.

"God, you're so rude. I don't know why I bother with you at all," he hissed at her. She stuck out her tongue good-naturedly and he shook his head. "Anyway," he continued with a pointed glared. "What I'm trying to say is that if you ever want to talk about whatever you're trying to hide, then I'll lend you an ear."

It was a nice statement, one that would normally make Gou feel warm inside from the fire of friendship, but all she felt was cold. She gave him a hesitant smile. "Thanks."

"Of course," he said, smacking her back hard enough to knock the wind out of her. "What are friends for?"

What indeed? The thought lingered in her mind as she headed back to the dorm. She had slipped. That much was obvious. But it was hard to ignore the fluttering in her chest any time that she saw Seijuurou. She already thought highly of him, and she hoped that her admiration for his authority and helpful personality would be the first thing people thought when they noticed her attention for him. But clearly she was giving off the wrong impression. Was she staring too much? Showing too much on her face? Did he know?

She entered her empty room with a sigh and leaned up against the door. It didn't really matter what the truth was. She wasn't at Samezuka to fall in love. Even if her heart yearned for something different, the only thing that was important was the competition against Iwatobi. She just had to keep reminding herself of that.

Gou sighed again, suddenly feeling exhausted. She shucked her tracksuit off, peeled off her swimsuit and rolled into comfortable clothes before collapsing on her bed. She relished in the feeling of comfort for a while until her fingers found her abandoned phone under her pillow. She pulled it out to check for any missed messages when she saw she had two missed phone calls and one voicemail from Rin. She lazily held the phone up to her ear and listened.

"Hey." She gave a small, fond smile at the familiar draw of his voice. It really had been a long time since she had seen her brother. "I don't know where the heck you are, so I guess I'll just have to tell you this way. I got some time from school, so I'm going to be making a trip back to Japan this weekend to finalize my transfer back home in a month. I need to drop by Samezuka Academy to make sure all of my enrollment goes through, but once that's done, we should meet up. So… yeah. Call me back."

The phone went dead in her ear and slowly slid from her cheek to bounce on her bed. She stared at the wall in shock. Samezuka? He was enrolling in Samezuka? The same school that she currently attended that knew her as a boy?

"Oh NOOOO," she groaned, pressing her hands against her head in despair.

Rin was going to kill her.