Watch Out For Weirdoes/ Tsukura Mono to Kowasu Mono

(Third Person P.O.V.)

One month after signing the treaty…

"Are you done with that stupid ritual yet? It's been thirty minutes already." Kakuzu complained as he watched his partner and the twitching body of the two-tails host.

"Oh shut up! Don't interrupt the ritual!" Hidan barked. He yanked the pike out of his chest and sat up. "You know, this assignment we've been given really doesn't mix well with my beliefs. Carnage is the key precept of the faith of Jashin… the dogma doesn't let me leave someone half dead." He said as he studied two-tails.

"It's that stupid faith of yours that's making us tardy."

"I know it's annoying, but it's my religion! And don't you start with that 'isn't there any way to abbreviate it' crap!"

Suddenly, a cold wind seemed to sweep right into the ruins of the city. The two Akatsuki immediately sensed the chakra of two powerful individuals.

"Up there." Kakuzu said, pointing to the top of a cliff.

Hidan looked up and saw, silhouetted against the glaring sun, two figures.

"Give us the neko-mononoke." One said.

Hidan raised his hand to block the glare and saw that they were wearing masks of some sort. The taller one wore heavy armor and a dragon mask while the shorter wore a long cloak, wide-brimmed hat and a mask in the form of a bird's skull. He was the one who had spoken.

"They want the host." Kakuzu said, standing to meet the challenge.

"If you want two-tails you'll have to go through us!" Hidan barked.

The two intruders nodded and jumped down to face them. The man in the dragon mask approached first, drawing a large katana so thick it looked as if it were made of stone. He paused when he caught a glimpse of Hidan's Jashin pendant.

"You," he said, "you are one of us."

"What?! No freakin' way! There's no way you're priests!"

"Not priests," the man in the bird mask said, his voice raspy, "a doctor and his dragon swordsman guard. We are of the mononoke, just as Jashin was."

"The what?!" Hidan growled, grabbing his scythe and leveling it at them. "That's blasphemy you're spouting!"

"Quit talking Hidan," Kakuzu growled, "We should finish them quickly."

Hidan smirked and grabbed his pendant.

"Jashin-sama, please watch over me, I am going to tear their intestines out..."

He rushed at the intruders, swiping at the dragon man, who blocked his attacks with ease.

"Not much of a surprise big guy," he said, "My attacks are the slowest in Akatsuki and the least skilled, so I just can't hit anything, seriously. But," he prepared to swing his scythe, "I'm sure as hell gonna try! Get ready, this is gonna hurt like hell!"

His attack fell short with a shudder as a blinding pain shot through his left side.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" He shouted.

The man in the bird mask had stabbed him in the ribs.

"Fuck you... you little shit, I am going to tear you to shreds, and then burn you to ashes, and then grind you to dust!!" He roared.

He attempted to raise his scythe again but found that even the slightest movement sent crippling pain racing down the entire left side of his body. He dropped to his knees, grasping at the dagger in his side. Kakuzu immediately stepped in, a blast of wind and fire sweeping the area. When their assailants were good and burnt to a crisp he knelt by his partner. Not because he cared, but because Hidan would only slow them down with a dagger in his ribs and likely complain nonstop.

"Fuck you and your slow ass. You LET that happen..." Hidan snarled.

"Hold still." Kakuzu said.

Without a moment's hesitation, he yanked the dagger out.

"DUDE! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH THAT FREAKIN' HURT?" Hidan shouted.

This was more than the pain he experienced during a ritual. This was true, agonizing pain.

"I should curse that leader next time, dammit!" He growled.

Just who were those mysterious masked men?