Author's Note: As always, thanks for all of your reviews. I am so very glad you're enjoying the story. Lots of angst in this chapter. Enjoy! ~lg

~oOo~

Daniel stood on the peltak of Anubis's mothership. Below him, a planet turned in space: Abydos. He'd lived amongst the Abydonians for a year of his life, making friendships that he kept until his "death." He'd watched over them, just as he'd watched over the rest of SG-1, since his ascension. But today was different. Today, he'd made a deal with Anubis to save the planet.

Abydos was more to Daniel than simply another planet orbiting yet another star. It was Sha're's home, a place where he'd sworn to bring her once he'd rescued her from the Goa'uld. When that proved impossible, he returned to Abydos to lay her to rest and mourn her passing, deciding that he wanted to retire there and be buried next to her when the time came. Instead, he'd ascended and laid aside that hope.

Now, however, Abydos was in danger. Daniel looked down at the desert planet, desperate to do something—anything—to see it continue.

"Now, I will destroy Abydos." Anubis's announcement rang through the bridge of his ship.

Daniel whirled in panic. He'd been on Abydos's surface, realizing that Oma had ascended the entire population. In an instant, he transported himself to Anubis's ship and made himself visible. "Stop!"

Anubis's First Prime fired a staff blast that went right through Daniel. He continued walking so that he stood face-to-face with the half-ascended Goa'uld. Anubis stood. "Stop me if you can."

Daniel lifted his chin, held out his hands palm up, and summoned all the power he possessed as an ascended being. Light began to glow, ironically paralleling this fight between him and Anubis. He continued to build that power, the light in his palms growing.

"Slay me now!" Anubis ordered. "Do it now, or I will destroy Abydos."

Daniel knew Anubis was taunting him with Abydos. But he couldn't risk his final link with Sha're being destroyed. He struck out, throwing every bit of the power that he'd gathered at Anubis. Anubis held up a hand as if to stop him, but something else happened. Daniel felt the drawing, as if Oma had grabbed him by the shirt collar and yanked him backwards. He fought her, trying in vain to overcome something so much more powerful than he was. "No! Don't do this!"

His plea went unanswered as, a mere second later, another ascended being joined the fight and yanked him away.

From his place where he'd knelt, Anubis's First Prime gaped. "You are indeed all-powerful, my lord."

"What you just saw was not my doing," Anubis explained as he returned to his throne. "However, this is." With that, his hand came down on the weapon's trigger, and Abydos ceased to exist.

"NOOOOO!" The shout woke Daniel as the memory of Abydos's destruction abruptly melted into the reality of his rooms on Evonnia. He sat in his bed, having come upright at the force of the memory. Sweat poured from his body, and his sheets were tangled. He blinked a couple of times as the emotion of the memory washed over him. Pulling his knees up, he propped his arms on them and wept. "No."

~oOo~

Donat had just arrived at Dr. Jackson's door, his normal duty time lengthened by his inability to sleep. He had much to consider when it came to Dr. Jackson, the least of which was whether to help the man or not. He settled into his normal pose when a shout abruptly echoed from the rooms within. Alarmed, Donat pushed the door open and rushed into the bed chamber.

Dr. Jackson sat in the center of his bed, wearing the tunic-like night clothes he preferred. His face was buried in his arms, and the sound of weeping could be heard.

Uncertain whether he should interrupt or not, Donat hesitated. "Dr. Jackson?"

The man looked up suddenly, his face red and tears streaming down his cheeks. "Donat?" He looked utterly bereft and lost. An instant later, the expression faded. "I'm. . .I'm fine. Just another nightmare."

Donat nodded and, understanding that Dr. Jackson would want some time to compose himself, retreated to the sitting room. Others had likely heard the man's shout, however, so he refused to leave until he knew what had happened. He listened to Dr. Jackson move about and wondered what, if anything, he could do to offer comfort. Whatever had disturbed the other man was obviously a grief beyond understanding.

When Dr. Jackson did appear, he'd dressed in brown pants and had yet to comb his hair or put on his spectacles. He looked exhausted although he'd just risen for the day. "Sorry about that," he said roughly.

Donat nodded. "It is no trouble." He hesitated. "If you would like to. . .I mean, if you need. . . ."

Dr. Jackson smiled. "I appreciate the thought, Donat." He heaved a great sigh. "I told you I'd ascended, right?"

"Yes."

"Then you know that, occasionally, I'll remember something?"

"Yes."

"That's what happened tonight." Dr. Jackson ran a hand over his face, scratching at the beard that had begun to grow. "My wife was from a world called Abydos. Even though I wasn't able to save her from the Goa'uld, I planned to return there, to one day be buried next to her." He stopped speaking long enough to swallow. "Well, a Goa'uld named Anubis learned that a very powerful piece of technology was hidden there—or so I'm told. What I remembered was Anubis. . . ." His voice trailed off for a moment, and then he cleared his throat. "He destroyed Abydos. I tried to stop him. I tried. . .and failed."

The absolute grief on his face tore at Donat. The guardsman watched as Dr. Jackson blinked to clear his eyes of the tears that had gathered. Then, he straightened. "If you don't mind, I'd rather be alone."

Donat stood. "If you need anything, Dr. Jackson, I will be at the door."

The other man nodded and was silent until Donat closed the door.

For the next three hours, Donat listened intently for any sign that Dr. Jackson needed anything. None came. He heard rustling inside, as if someone was moving furniture around and taking down curtains. A tiny smile came to Donat's face. He had never cared for the garish theme of the rooms and looked forward to Jovannah's reaction when she found that Dr. Jackson had changed things.

He sobered a moment later. He had many decisions to make, including what to do about Dr. Jackson. What the Malikah had done to him was wrong, and Donat knew that he should help the other man to escape. But so much more depended on Donat being able to keep his true identity and purpose a secret. There might be a way. The whisper from his conscience forced him to consider all the options facing him. Was there a way to help Dr. Jackson and advance his goal as well?

What about Dr. Jackson's sanity? This incident proved that the man had some terrible things buried in his mind. One of his strongest arguments against Jovannah was that he had barely begun to remember. Did Donat have the right to keep him from the people who could help him the most?

Sighing deeply, Donat kept watch as the sun rose. He'd known that, sooner or later, he'd have to make a choice. This morning, that choice had been made.

~oOo~

After Donat left, Daniel sat in place for all of thirty seconds. The rage from his memory burned hotly as he started to pace. Why would Oma, of all people, prevent him from stopping Anubis? Yes, it violated the rules of the Ascended. Yes, it crossed that fine line more than a little. But it was also not just something that Daniel wanted. He'd tried to save the people of an entire planet.

And had failed, thanks to Oma and one other. The anger welled up, and he grabbed one of the orange-red curtains around his bed and yanked at it. The ornately stitched loops that held it in place tore, and the tearing felt good. Too upset to do much more than react, Daniel tugged again, pulling it down around his feet. Moving swiftly to the other side of the bed, he jerked that curtain off of its anchors and then moved on to the windows. Each tug of fabric felt like a release, so he didn't stop there. He grabbed furniture and began dragging it into the sitting room. He would get rid of this fire and ice theme once and for all!

For the next hour, Daniel worked in a frenzy, ridding the bedroom of anything remotely orange-red. All the curtains were dumped on the floor next to the door, the furniture stacked on the other side. By the time he was done, only the bed and armoire remained in the bedroom. He moved on to the sitting room, realizing that he could do nothing more until someone carted the stuff away.

A sudden rush of exhaustion overwhelmed him, and he dropped into a chair. He would regret what he'd done, he knew. But it had felt good to be so destructive. At least for a moment. Back on Earth, he probably would have picked a fight with a Marine or Teal'c. Here, he didn't have that option. Now, though, the emotional impact of his memory hit him again. Tears once again filled his eyes.

Why? Though he asked the question silently, he knew it was directed to someone other than himself. Why did you stop me?

There was no answer.

Angry that he didn't receive one, Daniel laid his head back on the chair and promptly fell asleep.

~oOo~

"I'm sorry, Sir, but the best I can do is seventy-two hours." Dr. Janet Frasier stared at Jack O'Neill, hating the news she had to give him. "While we have access to advanced technology, we still have to wait for DNA profiling. I can, however, begin the autopsy and try to find another way to identify the body. But, that will take time."

Behind the desk, General Hammond nodded. "Get to it, Doctor."

"Yes, Sir." She left the room, hearing Hammond tell Jack to sit down.

As she gained the infirmary, Janet sighed. She was dealing with the emotional impact of having that body brought back through the Stargate every bit as much as SG-1 was. Seeing them come through, looking completely shattered, was something she'd never forget. The news that this poor, mutilated man might be Daniel was almost too much for Janet to bear. She'd withdrawn for a few moments to gain her composure and pull together her best people.

Now, all that was left was for the heartbreaking work of the autopsy to begin. She walked into the morgue to find Teal'c standing next to the stretcher holding the body bag. "Teal'c, I'm going to need you to leave."

"I will not." The Jaffa stared at the wall. "If this is Daniel Jackson, I wish to remain with him until he is laid to rest."

Janet walked over to him and, not intimidated by his size, put a hand on his arm. "I understand, Teal'c. I really do. But what I have to do to determine whether this is Daniel or not won't be pretty. I think he'd want you to remember him alive, not this way."

Teal'c turned to look at her, affording her the rare privilege of seeing beneath the stoic mask he typically wore. That glimpse of grief was almost enough to reduce Janet to a sobbing heap. Instead, she met his eyes and was rewarded when he nodded. "Very well," he said softly. "I will remain outside the door."

Janet offered a tiny smile, the kind that said she appreciated the gesture. "Thank you, Teal'c." Once he was gone, she turned and faced the gurney. "Oh, Daniel. This had better not be you."

~oOo~

Jovannah walked toward Daniel's rooms with purpose in her step. After their tryst last night, she'd expected him to join her for breakfast. A smile touched her face as she thought about his kisses and how gentle he'd been with her. Somehow, in their arguing, she had managed to break through his hostility. The man beneath all of that surprised her. They had stayed in the garden until late, just talking about everything and nothing. Daniel had held her hand the entire time, keeping her close to him just as she'd wanted. They had not done anything untoward, merely shared a few kisses though Jovannah had wanted more.

Now, however, she was concerned. Instead of sending Damek to find him, she decided to go herself. Donat stood outside Daniel's door, telling her that her love was inside. She knocked and, when she heard a faint call, walked into the rooms.

And stopped. Furniture was gathered near the door, situated haphazardly as it waited for someone to cart it away. A pile of the orange-red fabric nearly tripped her as she navigated the maze. The main portion of the room looked as if it had been completely emptied, very much like some of the unused rooms in the summer palace. Jovannah frowned. "Daniel?"

He appeared in the door leading to the bed chamber. "Jovannah?" His face was both amusing and disconcerting. He looked like a child caught doing something he shouldn't while showing signs of exhaustion. "I wasn't expecting you to come here."

"You missed breakfast." She crossed the room to his side and turned to survey his work. "What is the meaning of this?"

He shrugged and slipped an arm around her waist. "You wanted me to feel at home. To be honest, the fire and ice theme really got on my nerves."

Jovannah stared into his face, a smile toying at her lips. She'd quite liked the fire and ice theme, but this was to be Daniel's home, as well. Taking the time to commit this moment to memory, she enjoyed the sight of his sweat-dampened hair and how attractive he looked when he'd been working. "Then you should redo these rooms." Turning away, she frowned. "What will you do?"

"Oh, I dunno." He left her side and went back to what he'd been doing, which was wrestling the massive bed from one wall to the other. "Rearranging, new colors, maybe some pictures on the walls. That sort of thing." The bed refused to budge, and he stepped back to glare at it as if it would make the bed get up and walk to where he wanted it to go.

Jovannah suppressed the chuckle and strode purposefully to the door. Donat turned to her, and she grinned. "Dr. Jackson needs your help moving furniture. But, first, find someone who can take this old furniture away. Store it for use in one of the unoccupied rooms of the summer palace."

Donat nodded and trotted away to do her bidding.

Behind her, Daniel straightened. "You didn't have to do that."

"I know." She moved to his side. "But there is more life in your eyes than I have seen since you came to the palace."

"Yeah." He hesitated. "Jovannah, last night wasn't a good night. I had a memory surface that. . . ." He blinked rapidly. "I'm really trying to forget."

She reached up and touched his face, enjoying the feel of his beard against her palm. "I wish I could help."

"You already are," he said softly. Then, without waiting for permission, he bent and gently kissed her.

Jovannah leaned into the kiss, wanting to take this to more intense, more intimate places. But, last night, Daniel had explained that royalty on his world rarely shared a bed until they'd said their marriage vows. While that was not always so among the Malikahs of Evonnia, Jovannah had decided to observe that for Daniel's sake. So, when he pulled away a second later, she did not complain. Instead, she smiled. "I will send someone to help you. Whatever you need, Daniel."

"Thank you."

Happier than she'd been in her entire life, Jovannah left the chambers and headed for her own rooms. Soon, Daniel would be hers, and she would cherish every moment with him.

~oOo~

As the door closed behind Jovannah, Daniel shuddered and swiped the back of his hand across his mouth. Last night, he'd realized that he would have to pretend, to gain her trust. It soured his stomach every time he thought about it, but he had no other recourse. At least she'd accepted his lie about royalty not sleeping together until they were married. If she hadn't, she would have known that his "affection" for her was all an act.

Determined not to think about it, Daniel went back to fighting with the bed. He wanted it facing the windows so he could see the sunrise. While not a morning person on Earth, he didn't have coffee on Evonnia to help him wake up. A short time later, Donat appeared, and the bed moved into place with ease.

~oOo~

Sam sat in her lab, staring at nothing as she tried to absorb the impact of her recent trip through the Stargate. This should be easier to handle. After all, she'd already lost Daniel once. But the not knowing was killing her. She had another forty-eight hours left to wait before DNA came back and they knew whether or not the body they'd found was Daniel. Until then, Jack and Teal'c refused to accept it.

Sam wished she could so easily set the matter aside. She'd accomplished nothing since returning to Earth, hadn't slept well, and wound up sitting in this chair. Ever since Daniel's return, she'd been reminded of how often she'd missed her closest friend. Now, she faced his death all over again. Her stomach turned suddenly, and she jumped to her feet. She barely made it to the bathroom before her lunch made a reappearance. The emotional storm in her mind and heart had clearly affected her body.

Rinsing her mouth and returning to her lab, Sam decided that she should try to get some work done. She powered up her laptop and blinked at the screen. Nothing made sense. The words and equations all fit together, but she couldn't make heads or tails of it because her focus wasn't there. At one time, work had been her refuge. Not this time.

Torn between pretending to be useful and giving in to that emotion, Sam rose and walked out of her lab. She'd already been approved for some personal time and, rather than making her way to the women's locker room, found herself standing outside of Daniel's office. She moved cautiously, seeing the touches of his presence that he'd already brought back since his return from ascension. The picture of Sha're no longer graced his desk, having taken up a prominent place in his new home. But his journals were there, and Sam felt as if his presence had surrounded her. Beyond exhausted from the emotion of the last twenty-four hours, she dropped into Daniel's chair, buried her face in her arms, and promptly fell asleep.

~TBC