*brushes dust off of account, looks up sheepishly at readers*

Well…erm…hello there. It's…ah….been awhile, hasn't it?

…

I CAN EXPLAIN!...ok, actually, I can't. I've been both really lazy and really busy, what with my Honors English class and new horror/survival game and all. I also couldn't think of many ideas or themes for these. It may start to go dormant for a long while, but will stay open just in case.

I have been writing, though. Shameless plug - A certain unnamed multi-chap is coming along quite nicely for me. It shall be posted on my fictionpress account soon.

That is, of course, after my dear editor goes over it. Speaking of which, this chapter is going to have a great big dedication, because I'm in kind of a sappy mood right now –

For:

Ciara, Jamie, Jared, Utah, Stephanie, Thomas, and the whole gang, who will never have the chance to read this. Utah, keep working on that secret laboratory.

Cheyenne – Eleven years of friendship; don't let it die because you're gone.

Lauren - Get well soon, and take care of yourself. Don't forget to breathe.

Ash - We are the oddest pair of friends I've ever seen. Wouldn't want it any other way.

Grandpa McGraw and Tex Hill, for being the biggest hero's in my life. Thanks for the advice, Tex. Say hi to your wife for me.

Katie – I would be lost without my friend and editor. Thank you so much. :)

Mom - Without you, I wouldn't be the bookworm and artist I am today.

Joe – Best uncle ever. Period. Never have I met a man who can swear in the presence of a seven year old and make it look ok. :D

And most importantly, to my Dad, who led me into a world of steam locomotives, Gordon Lightfoot, and fly-fishing. I never want to leave.

Onward!

"…Valkyrie…"

"Yes?"

"Am I correct in assuming that you just flicked a carrot at me?"

Valkyrie peered into her box of takeout, shrugged, and took another bite of her salad.

"Probably," Was the nonchalant reply. "Why?"

"Because it is currently stuck to the side of my face."

Snickering, Valkyrie continued to eat her dinner, careful not to spill anything on the seat of the Bentley. Gazing past Skulduggery (who was irritably peeling the carrot strip from the side of his skull), Valkyrie wondered for the tenth time that evening when Scapegrace was going to gather up the nerve to leave his hiding place. They had chased him through the streets on foot at first, then gave up and hopped in the parked Bentley when they rounded the same street for the second time that evening.

When Scapegrace saw them gaining on him, he ducked into a local cafe and sat down at a table in the center of the restraunt, looking pleased with himself. Skulduggery and Valkyrie didn't dare to apprehend him in the middle of a crowded place with too many mortal witnesses. So, they parked just on the other side of the street, and waited.

And waited.

Finally, Valkyrie had announced she was going to go to the small convenience store next to them and buy some food. They were obviously going to be there a while.

Now, a few hours later, she was starting to get extremely bored.

Subtly, she picked up another small shred of lettuce on her fork and flicked it at her partner.

He flinched slightly, then sighed as he picked the offending vegetable off his forehead and dropped it out the window of the car.

It was soon replaced by another.

"Do you mind?" Skulduggery growled.

"It's my salad, I can do what I want with it!"

They sat for a few moments in still silence. Valkyrie was about to catapult another carrot when suddenly Skulduggery jumped in his seat and threw the car into gear.

"There he goes!"

Scapegrace was trying unsuccessfully to edge his way out behind a flock of people exiting the café. As soon as he was a few feet from the door, he burst into a flat out run.

Valkyrie was about to snap close the container, when Skulduggery floored the gas pedal.

Next thing she knew, the box flew from her hands and her vision went green.

Sputtering in outrage, she ignored the hysterical laughs from her friend and instead snapped,

"Just drive!"

Brushing the vegetables off her face, Valkyrie managed to get most of them back in the box. Scowling, she looked out the window to see how Scapegrace was doing.

Skulduggery had easily pulled up alongside him, and he was puffing worriedly, trying to outrun the Bentley.

Then, Valkyrie got an idea.

Unbuckling her seatbelt and gripping the open salad box tightly, Valkyrie leaned far out the window.

"What are you doing?"

"Pull up ahead of him!"

"What?"

"Just do it!"

Skulduggery shrugged, and sped the car up just enough for Valkyrie to be two feet away from Scapegrace, who looked at her confusedly.

Valkyrie aimed and tossed the salad. She hit her mark.

Scapegrace squealed and tripped as the box of vegetables hit him full on in the face, and he promptly fell forward. Raising his lettuce-adorned head, Scapegrace groaned when he saw the skeleton and the girl standing over him and let his head fall back into the box.

"Well, I must admit, I've never seen someone apprehend a criminal with nothing but a salad before. It was…" Skulduggery trailed off.

"Awesome?" Valkyrie offered. "Brilliant? Extraordinary?"

"…stupid, yet effective."

Valkyrie glared.

"I mean, all you did was throw a box at his face."

"Out of a moving car!"

"Hmph."

Valkyrie's scowl only deepened when Skulduggery helpfully picked a strand of lettuce out of her hair.

"Skulduggery Pleasant, Valkyrie Cain/Stephanie Edgley, Scapegrace, Scaramouch Van Dreg, Tanith Low, Ghastly Bespoke, etc. Belong to Derek Landy and his publishers, respectively."