Glee does not belong to me...
Funk
Sunday afternoon I was packing my school stuff at my mom's house to take to my dad's, when the doorbell rang. I let mom take it as I keep packing.
"Hey, beautiful" Jesse says hugging me from behind, and taking me by surprise.
"Hey!" I say turning around to give him a kiss. "I thought you were going to spend the day with your dad"
"I was" he says looking me with a thoughtful look. "But he told me something that I want to talk to you about" he says pulling me to sit on the edge of my bed.
"What did he say?" I say getting worried.
"He manage to transfer me back to Carmel" he says with a solemn face. "I start tomorrow"
"You're not going back to McKinley?" I ask sadly.
"No, I'm moving back to Akron" he says.
"But what about your mom? I mean, we knew he'll found a way, but…" I was saying not knowing what to do.
"She'll be staying with my aunt, but I have to move back with my Dad" he says standing up and walking towards my window sit.
"So, now what?" I ask walking towards him.
"Now, it's going to be as before, but I'm going back to Vocal Adrenaline" he says pulling me to him.
"So we are going to compete against each other" I say pointing out the obvious.
"Yeah…" he said supporting his forehead on mine.
"I was looking forward to sing with you at regionals" I say sadly.
"I know, me too…" he says.
"But now I have to beat you" I say trying to light out the mood.
"We'll see about that" he say laughing softly.
"I'm going to miss you" I say putting my head on his chest.
"Me too" he says pulling me closer.
Walking on the halls at McKinley without Jesse feels off. I mean I know that he was here only for a couple of months but still I was getting used to have him with me. And now he's back with Vocal Adrenaline and I have to compete against him. And let's be real, now that he's back with them, there's no way we can beat them. All I have left is pray for a miracle.
"Rachel" Lila says stopping in front of me in the halls making me stop walking.
"Lila?" I asks curious as to why she has that weir look on her face.
"Why did you have to tell Aunt Shelby that I was spying on her and Vocal Adrenaline?" she asks demanding.
"Because she had to know. Besides I don't keep things from her" I tell her.
"Right, well thanks to you I'm grounded" she says before walking away.
"What the hell?" I murmur to myself.
"Is it just me or does it feel like we have a real shot at regionals next month?" I hear Mercedes says as she turns the corner with Kurt, Tina and Artie.
"The Ohio show choir chat rooms have all been buzzing about how Vocal Adrenaline has lost his step" Artie says.
"I agree, the judges know all of their tricks, and now that we have Jesse, they've lost there best performer" Kurt says.
"Actually…" I say making them stop and turn towards me. "That's not true anymore" I say walking towards them.
"Why?" Tina asks confuse.
"Jesse's dad manage to transfer him back to Carmel, and as of today, is part of Vocal Adrenaline again" I confess.
"What?!" they exclaim.
"What are we going to do now?" Artie asks terrified.
"I don't know" I say honestly.
"You guys have to come to the auditorium" Lila says coming out of nowhere. "It's an emergency" she says running away.
So we all follow her to the auditorium to find the other glee kids there, and Vocal Adrenaline on our stage.
"Jesse?" I ask confuse. "What's going on? What are you guys here?"
"The guys wanted to say something to your glee club, now that I'm back at Carmel and on VA" he says.
"Why here, in our auditorium?" Finn says walking closer to the stage.
"Blogs in chat rooms say that we're finish and that you guys are right to top us" Andrea says walking to stand next to Jesse. "We just wanted to show you a little something that we came up with a few days ago, and now that Jesse's back we convince him to join us" she says before they all got into position.
Vocal Adrenaline:
Bum, bum, bum (Jesse: Ooohh - Let's go!)
Ba da ba ba da bum
Jesse:
Steve walks wearily down the street
With his brim pulled way down low
Ain't no sound but the sound of his feet?
Machine guns ready to go
Are you ready (Vocal Adrenaline Boys: Hey!)
Are you ready for this?
Are you hanging on the edge of your seat?
Out of the doorway the bullets rip
To the sound of the beat
Jesse with Vocal Adrenaline Girls:
Yeah!
Vocal Adrenaline Boys (Jesse with Vocal Adrenaline Girls):
Bum, bum, bum (Another one bites the dust)
Bum, bum, bum
(Another one bites the dust, yeah)
Jesse (with Vocal Adrenaline):
How do you think I'm gonna get along (without you when you're gone?)
You took me for everything that I had and (kicked me out on my own)
Jesse with Vocal Adrenaline Girls:
Are you happy? Are you satisfied?
How long can you stand the heat?
Out of the doorway the bullets rip
To the sound of the beat
Jesse with Vocal Adrenaline:
Look Out!
Vocal Adrenaline Boys (Jesse with Vocal Adrenaline Girls):
Bum, bum, bum (Another one bites the dust)
Bum, bum, bum (Another one bites the dust; and another one gone)
And another one gone (Another one bites the dust, yeah)
Hey, I'm gonna get you to, another one bites the dust (Vocal Adrenaline Girls: Oooh, ohh!)
Vocal Adrenaline Boys (Jesse with Vocal Adrenaline Girls):
Bum, bum, bum (Another one bites the dust)
"Thanks for letting us borrow your auditorium guys. It's quaint" Andrea say laughing before all of them leave, except for Jesse.
"I couldn't stop them, I'm sorry" he says before following them.
"This sucks" Tina says as we're all walking back to the choir room.
"It's a Carmel High tradition, they intimidate the competition a few weeks before the big show. They called Funkification, meaning, they show us what they got and we spiral into a deep depression" Artie says.
"Yeah, it's true. I remember, they to this to every type of competition they have so far. My mom always tried to stop it, but they always manage to do it anyways" I say.
"Yeah, we used to do the same thing to other football teams. Trying to get into their heads before the big game, pulling some pranks to intimidate them" Finn says making me roll my eyes.
"Yeah, but the difference is our football team sucks and those guys are golden" Puck says.
"Come on keep your heads on guys, it's going to take more than that to get us into a funk" he says as we walk into the choir room to found it full of toilet paper.
"Yeah, they are putting us into a FUNK" I say trying to walk through the paper.
"Come on guys, let's clean this up" Mr. Schue says pulling some trash cans to the middle of the room.
"I feel so violated. It's like someone broke into our home" Tina say as she gets a bunch of paper on the trash can.
"Look it just a lame little prank. And the fact that they're trying to get to us means that they're scare" Mr. Schue says.
"I don't know Mr. Schue. They aren't afraid of anything" Mercedes says. "That number they did was fantastic. And you know it doesn't make any sense they have all that equipment, how did they even get in?" she says confuse.
"I gave them all keys" Sue says walking into the room with some guys trailing behind her with one of the Cheerios trophies. "Help them do a sound check over the weekend" she says before ordering to the guys behind her to do some changes on the walls for her trophies.
"Sue, get out of my room" Mr. Schue tells her after she started talking about making this room a trophy annex for the cheerios.
"Glee Clubbers, for those of you whose hearing has not been damage for a massive doses of anti-acne, listen up. In a few weeks, glee club would be finish. Now how do I know that? I recently talk to my Vegas buddy, and he told me that you are a 40 to 1 underdogs at regionals. You're going to lose and your dream would be crush" she says with a smug smile.
"Sue can I see your trophy?" Mr. Schue says.
"Sure, will. Hope and dream" Sue says as Mr. Schue took the trophy and throw it to a wall destroying it.
"You drop your trophy, Sue" Mr. Schue says as if nothing happened.
"You know for me trophies are like herpes. You can try and get rid of them, but the keep coming. You know why? Sue Sylvester has outlay, burning, highly contagious talent. Enjoy your last few days here. This room is mine" She says before leaving, making us more depressed.
After school I drive to my mom's office to talk about what Vocal Adrenaline did.
"Mom, did you know about the prank the did this morning?" I ask her as I sit next to her on the auditorium.
"Actually, no. I found out when they got here for practice" she say while grading some papers.
"Well, even if I knew that Jesse wasn't going back to McKinley, it still hurt seeing him with them" I say pulling at my skirt.
"Well, honey, you know that if I could stop them I would, but they'd do it ether way" she says looking at me.
"I know, I just have this feeling that this is just the beginning" I say signing.
"Why do you say that?" she says putting her pen down and putting attention on me.
"I know that the guys are going to do something to avenge what they did to our choir room, I don't know what dough, but I know it. And when they do your guys… they are going to do something worse. I just feel it" I say.
"Well, we'll just have to wait and see what happens" she say patting my leg.
"I just hope that Jesse doesn't help them" I say sinking on my sit.
"I just wish they would stop with this annual thing" she says going back to grade her papers.
And just as I predicted. After Mr. Schue talk to us about regrets and about us losing to VA at regionals and getting revenge for what they did to us, Finn and Puck made the stupid decision to slash the tires of all of the VA Range Rovers. And to say that my Mom was pissed is to say the list. So now they had to find a job to pay for the tires. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
So the next class he selected that we were going to do Funk, because is the only music style Vocal Adrenaline can't do. And thanks to Mercedes trying to made fun of Quinn's want for do Funk, Quinn decided to prove her wrong by singing a funk some the next day, where she broad some pregnant girls that were part of a club or something.
"For some of us, just simply getting to class takes a little bit longer. When you're pregnant, you're responsible for two lives. And you're walking down the hallway, oppressed by the man" Quinn started to say before singing. "Hearing people called you 'Fat'" she says before the pregnant girls walk into the room. "Sometimes it hurts. Sometime you have to stop and hold that precious life and say no"
"This is offensive. Who are this girls?" Artie asks.
"We are the Unwed Mothership Connection, and that's what we are here to sing about" Quinn says as the music started.
Quinn:
This is a man's world
This is a man's world
But it wouldn't be nothing, nothing
Without a woman or a girl
Quinn with Unwed Mothership Connection harmonizing:
You see
Man made the cars to take us over the road
Man made the train to carry the heavy load
Man made electric light to take us out the dark
Man made the boat for the water, like Noah made the ark
This is a man's, man's, man's world
But it wouldn't be nothing, nothing
Without a woman or a girl (Unwed Mothership Connection: Without a woman or a girl)
Quinn with Unwed Mothership Connection:
Man thinks about the little baby girls and the baby boys
Man make them happy, 'cause man made them toys
Quinn with Unwed Mothership Connection harmonizing:
And after man make everything, everything he can
Do you know that man makes money? (Unwed Mothership Connection: He makes money)
To buy from other man (Unwed Mothership Connection: To buy from other man)
Quinn with Unwed Mothership Connection:
This is a man's world
Quinn (Unwed Mothership Connection):
But it would be nothing, nothing
Not a one little thing (Nothing, nothing)
Without a woman or a girl
(Huh-uh) He's lost (Huh-uh) in the wilderness
(Huh-uh) He's lost (Huh-uh) in betterness
(Huh-uh) He's lost, lost somewhere now (Huh-uh) in loneliness
After the song ended we all but Mercedes got up to show our support to Quinn. I mean I knew it was hard being pregnant at sixteen, but I never imagine how bad it for her.
So after the stupid idea of Mr. Schue about humiliating Sue, she didn't wanted to even get out of bed, which cause that almost all of the Cheerios except Kurt and I, to go crazy, even Santana was seen crying on the halls, and to make thing worse Finn, Puck and Mercedes sang 'Good Vibrations' by Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch, thinking it was a funk song. I mean we are in a deep funk.
And as I also predicted VA, avenged for what Finn and Puck did to their tires. They egged Lila after finding out that she's a vegan. You can imagine how traumatize she was, she kept dreaming about the little chicken mothers coming at her for revenge. So the guys wanted to beat the crap out of them, but thank god Mr. Schue stopped them.
"I have an idea. Rachel dial Jesse's number on your phone" Mr. Schue says to me.
"You haven't deleted his number jet?" Tina asks.
"He wasn't part of this" I say as I dial Jesse's number and giving my phone to Mr. Schue.
"And how do you know?" Santana asks not believing me.
"Because he was with me when this happened" I say before focusing on Mr. Schue.
"Jesse St. James? Will Schuester here. You and Vocal Adrenaline need to meet in our auditorium, Friday, 3 sharp" Mr. Schue says before hanging up.
So after winning Nationals with the Cheerios where Kurt and I did a mash up. We waited for Vocal Adrenaline, Friday afternoon at 3 pm. Where we show them what Funk is about.
"Thank you for coming, after how thing have gone so far between our groups and this pranks, we decided the only way of truly Funkify you, is to show you the one thing we know you can't do. So enjoy" I says before taking my position on stage.
Kurt:
Roof off
We're gonna tear the roof off the mother sucker
Tear the roof off the sucker
Tear the roof
We're gonna tear the roof off the mother sucker
Tear the roof off the sucker
Finn and Mercedes with Tina and New Directions:
You've got a real type of thing going down, getting down
There's a whole lot of rhythm going round
You've got a real type of thing going down, getting down
There's a whole lot of rhythm going round
Finn, Mercedes, and Tina with New Directions:
We want the funk, give up the funk
We need the funk, we gotta have that funk
We want the funk, give up the funk
We need the funk, we gotta have that funk
Na-na-na-na-na
Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo, ow
Na-na-na-na-na
Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo, ow
Artie and Mercedes with New Directions:
We're gonna turn this mother out (New Directions: We want the funk, give up the funk)
We're gonna turn this mother out
(New Directions: We need the funk, we gotta have that funk) (Mercedes: This mother out)
We're gonna turn this mother out (New Directions: We want the funk, give up the funk)
We're gonna turn this mother out
(New Directions: We need the funk, we gotta have that funk) (Mercedes: We're gonna turn this mother out hey!)
Finn and Mercedes with Tina and New Directions:
Na-na-na-na-na
Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo, ow (New Directions: You've got a real type of thing going down)
You've got a real type of thing going down, gettin' down
There's a whole lot of rhythm going down (Mercedes: Whole lot of rhythm going down!)
You've got a real type of thing going down, gettin' down
There's a whole lot of rhythm going round
Mercedes:
Yeeaahh!
Finn, Mercedes, and Tina with New Directions:
We want the funk, give up the funk
We need the funk, we gotta have that funk (Mercedes: Funky!)
We want the funk, (Mercedes: Yeahhh!)
Give up the funk
We need the funk, we gotta have that funk
We want the funk (Kurt: We're gonna tear the roof off the mother sucker)
(Mercedes: Funky funky!) (Kurt: Tear the roof off the sucker)
Give up the funk (Kurt: Tear the roof off)
We need the funk (Kurt: We're gonna tear the roof off the mother sucker)
(Mercedes: Get down man!)
We gotta have that funk (Kurt: Tear the roof off the sucker)
(Mercedes: Heey)
We want the funk, give up the funk
We need the funk, we gotta have that funk
Mercedes:
Heeeeeyyy!
"See you funks at regionals" Puck says we all left the stage.
I wait it outside of the auditorium for Jesse to come out so I could talk to him.
"Jesse!" I say as Vocal Adrenaline was leaving the auditorium. "Can we talk?" I say walking towards him.
"Yeah, sure. Go ahead guys" he tells the guys.
"Good song, Rach" Andrea say passing me by.
"Thanks" I say smiling while waiting for them to be out of hearing.
"Hey, how's Lila?" Jesse asks with a concern voice.
"A little bit shaky… but she's trying not to think about it" I say.
"I wish I could have known" he says sadly.
"I know, me too" I say before hugging him. "Did mom give you guys a hard time?" I ask wondering what she did.
"Not me thank god" he says pulling me along with him to walk towards the parking lot. "But the others have to stay till really late at school doing community work for what they did"
"Well they had it coming" I say as he walks me to my car.
"Yeah… see you tonight?" he asks after opening my door.
"See you tonight" I say before giving him a big kiss, before getting in my car and drive to my dad's house.
So here is the Funkyfication chapter, did my best to not harm Jesse's and Rachel relationship. Next it's the last chapter of season 1.
I don't know yet how long this story is going to be but I'll do my best.
I made a set of photos for this chapter on my Polyvore account. Hope you like it…
Xoxoxoxo…