Authors like me are the reason I tend to search for complete stories only.
A wee bit overdue, but I've planned to finish this story for a while. Two more chapters to go (written but not polished up yet) and it will be finished.
Still fairly canon, if you only count the Books. I tried wading through Pottermore but there's way too much information for me - that place makes the Star Wars Expanded Universe look uncomplicated.
Chapter 10
A.M.L.A Breakfast Meeting, Tuesday Nov 3
Hermione tapped her quill impatiently and looked over at Ron who was just polishing off a second breakfast. "Can I start now or is someone still 'bleeding starving'?"
He waved a hand at her. "Go on. Make it fast, though. I've gotta get to work."
"First of all," Hermione said. "Where is Neville?"
"He accepted that job offer in South America," Harry said. "Said it was safer than staying here."
"Wasn't that job offer from the group that wants to track and capture the newly discovered mobile man-eating plants?" Hermione asked.
"That's the one," Harry nodded.
Hermione sighed. "Bright boy, that Neville. Moving on, I shouldn't have to say this but, pay attention Luna, A.M.L.A is a law-abiding organization, we can win this one through peaceful methods. None of us should be promoting criminal acts of protest against the Marriage Law."
Luna frowned. "What a silly thing to say. Who would do that in the first place?"
"Luna! You wrote an article saying the embassy vandalism was, and I quote, 'an absolutely wonderful opportunity'."
Luna crossed her arms and tilted her chin up defiantly. "The first sentence was 'We in no way condone or endorse illegal actions'."
"Then you went on to encourage people to 'misplace' or 'forget' about petitions already filed," Hermione said, waving the offending paper at her.
Ron interrupted her. "Shouldn't you be lecturing everyone who rushed to refile with the Ministry, 'Mione?"
"Lecture 'em, and kick 'em where it hurts," Harry added.
"Besides, it's been kind of fun watching the Marriage Law people working triple shifts the last couple of days trying to fix the mess," Ron said.
"'Triple shifts',"Luna repeated. "Any sign of them giving up this nonsense yet, Unnamed Ministry Source?"
"It's not the bosses who are working overtime, Luna," Harry pointed out. "So, no, they're not going to give up that easily."
Department of Magical Law Enforcement, Auror Headquarters, Monday Nov 16
Ron stepped over a snoring grey-suited wizard buried under a pile of scrolls. "Look Harry, another dedicated worker for the Marriage Bureau."
"I feel bad for the poor sods, really," Harry said as he walked by, taking a moment to snatch a couple of the scrolls and casually letting them drop at the other end of the corridor.
"Better get a move on," Ron said speeding up. "We don't want to be late for the morning briefing again."
"New assignment, people," the current Head of Department said, glaring at Harry and Ron who had just run in and were still out of breath. "TheMinistry needs us to fix their mistakes. I know, I know, business as usual. Damn Ministry twits. This time around it's the newly created Marriage Bureau that needs us to cover their arses. A good quarter of the Marriage petitions have not been resubmitted. It's simply shocking, isn't it? Rather than just accepting the loss as what happens when you leave stuff out where it can catch on fire - the Bureau paper pushers have put together a list of all the pure-bloods who sent owls to the Bureau and have yet to refile a petition."
"They think every owl equals a petition? Are they bloody daft?"
"If those twits try to force me to file a petition just because I owled a letter of protest..." grumbled a six-foot tall witch with a beater's build.
"Oh yes, Auror Melanie Cross," the Head said, glancing down at a rather lengthy scroll. "You're on the list."
"Am I going to have to kill someone, Boss?"
"... why don't we just cross your name off here. Melanie Cross did not file a petition. Done. Only three hundred and forty two left to go."
"What are we supposed to do?" asked one of the senior Aurors.
"Knock on every door and order 'em to come out with their petitions up," his partner said with a snicker.
"Bugger that."
"Settle down, boys," the Head said with a glare. "You know I can't refuse a direct order from the Ministry. They want an investigation team on this, and they're going to get one."
"Who's the unlucky blokes?" asked Melanie Cross. "It better not be my team."
"Potter! Weasley! Congratulations. You get to head up your very own investigation. Don't screw it up."
Elite Investigation Team, Tuesday Nov 17
"When he said 'Don't screw it up'," Ron asked, "are we screwing it up? We've got zero new petitions after fourteen visits."
"Nah, we're good," Harry answered. He checked the address of the apartment they had just walked up to and then knocked imperatively. "Raul Zabini?" he said as the door opened.
"I didn't do nothing," squeaked the alleged Raul Zabini as he backed up and hit the wall.
"Hey, we're the good guys," Harry said. "There's no need to be nervous. Not unless you're into blood sacrifices or something."
"Oi! Nice shiner, mate," Ron said as he looked over Harry's shoulder. Raul was indeed sporting a lovely black eye.
"I'll make this quick," Harry said in a bored voice. "You sent an owl to the Marriage Bureau on the 29th of October. What was the purpose of this message?"
"Uh ...," Raul swallowed nervously and looked up towards the other room where a silent figure stood idly tapping his wand against his arm.
"Hello, Blaise," Harry said giving him a little wave. "Been a while."
"My fool of a cousin sent a foolish question about a foolish law, that's all," Blaise said. "Isn't that right, Raul?"
"Er ..."
"Just to be clear, Raul," Harry said. "Did you, at any time, send an official Marriage Petition to the Ministry?"
"Of course not," Blaise answered for him.
'Uh huh," Harry jotted something down on his notebook. "And are you, Raul Zabini, willing to state that you have not been pressured or coerced in any way to deny the existence of a legally binding and submitted Marriage Petition?"
"Potter, please," Blaise said. "He's an idiot, but he's still a Zabini."
"That's a no, then?"
"I'm pretty sure he's supposed to answer the question," Ron said, pointing at Raul.
"Well?" Blaise said, poking his cousin with his wand.
Raul squeaked. "No! I mean, yes, that's a no."
"Good enough," Harry said cheerfully as he snapped his notebook shut. "Nice seeing you again, Blaise."
10 Minutes Later
"You offered Blaise a job! You offered to help get a Slytherin git into the Aurors!"
"Don't be such a Gryffindor, Ron," Harry said.
"We are so screwing up," Ron whimpered.
McGonagall's Office, Friday Nov 20
McGonagall looked up from a pile of paperwork and smiled at her visitor. "Severus! Always a pleasure."
"I rather doubt it will be today," he said as he handed her a stack of papers.
She frowned as she glanced through the papers. "You have given your entire estate to Hogwarts? What in Merlin's name are you doing?"
"My entire known estate, at least," he said smugly. "And do note the date - I had the documents drawn up and completed well before that insidious Law was passed."
"Oh dear," she said as she worked something out. "So that the Ministry can't seize your assets when you ..."
He shrugged and sat down. "Run? Cross the Channel? Bugger off?"
"How could you have been so sure the Law would pass?"
"Minerva, how often have I told you that you can never underestimate the stupidity of absolutely everyone?"
"But, just leaving? Wouldn't even a sham marriage be better? We really don't want to lose you."
He groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose with one hand. "I did consider it. The thing is I just can't stand the thought of being married, even if it isn't an entirely real marriage, to some woman I do not respect."
"Aha! I told you our Severus was a romantic, didn't I?" Albus' portrait declared as he leaned forwards and rubbed his hands together with glee.
"Shut up, Albus," Snape growled. "Go pester the students, I mean, go impart some words of wisdom to the younger generation."
"I never thought you'd give up," McGonagall said leaning back and sighing. "Especially after that Hallowe'en fun at the Ministry, which you had nothing to do with."
"That was a delaying tactic, nothing more. Well, a delaying tactic and a message to the Ministry that they're lucky I'm too knackered to fight another war. Not that I had anything to do with that Hallowe'en event."
"I suppose it was too much to hope for that all of your petitions would be mysteriously misplaced."
"Even if no one resubmitted a petition, all the Ministry had to do is get their hands on the current Betting list."
"Betting list?"
"Oh really, Minerva? You have to do a better job of keeping an eye on things then that," Albus chuckled. "Several Brokers have ongoing bets on who the more prominent Muggle-born and half-bloods will end up marrying."
"Let me guess - they've offered to paint in various displays of candy in your favourite portraits, in return for telling them who to bet on?" Minerva said.
"Right, it's great fun."
"For you," Snape snapped as he searched through his pockets. "Ah, here's the latest 'Snape betting list' sent to me an 'enterprising' former student. I believe that one offered me a full fifty percent of the winnings."
"It's very ... detailed," McGonagall said, eyeing the betting list.
"Part A is all the witches who have petitioned, cross referenced by name of petitioner, house, date sent, occupation, and age. Part B is a list of available witches who are intelligent enough not to have filed a petition. Your name is a quarter of the way from the bottom, if you're wondering."
McGonagall blushed, but still followed the directions to find her own listing. "Hmph 2100 to 1. Really, I'm not that ... wait ..., Molly Weasley, that can't be right. Oh it is. Odds 1400 to 1. How can she possibly have better odds than me? How would even work?"
Snape tapped his chin and looked thoughtful. "Let's see now - Arthur dies in a tragic potions mishap. I Wait until after the funeral and then find Molly and say something like 'My condolences on your tragic loss, but look on the bright side, now you can do me a really, really big favour'. Molly swoons and falls into my waiting arms. The Weasley children all turn Muggle in shock."
"I say, that would solve his problem most admirably," Phineas Nigellus piped up from his portrait.
"There is no problem to solve," Snape said, standing up and pushing his chair back. "I'll be leaving now, if that's alright with you, Minerva. I have a few last-minute things to attend to."
"Do something," Albus hissed as Snape turned and walked to the door.
"Severus!" Minerva called, sitting up straight. "Before you go, I just want to let you know that I've always respected you. Even when I thought that you had betrayed us - I respected you."
He stopped with one hand holding the door open and took a deep breath before turning around. "Thank you, Minerva."
"Severus!" Albus whispered as he waved his hands widely and pointed his chin down towards McGonagall.
"Oh, er, and of course I have always had the utmost respect for you, Minerva," Snape said hesitantly.
"Really?" McGonagall said with a wide smile.
"Gah! You fool. This is a sad, sad day for Slytherin," Phineas said, taking off his hat and hiding his face behind it.
Snape stared at him for a minute, and then groaned.
"You do respect me, Severus?"
"Yes, Minerva, you know I do."
"Do you trust me enough to marry me?" she waited for his nod of agreement. "Well, then," she said brightly. "Since I don't want to spend my weekend looking for substitute teachers for you classes, why don't we put an end to this petition nonsense tomorrow? I hear the Ministry has set up a rapid Marriage process for petitioned wizards and witches."
He crossed his arms, looked up at the ceiling, and then sighed and nodded at the Headmistress. "Alright, I don't really want to leave my comfortable quarters seeing as I just got them put back into order, but I will take five hundred points from the first Gryffindor who calls me Mr. McGonagall."
"Don't forget to contact a few of your 'enterprising former students' before tomorrow," Phineas Nigellus said. "You may as well make a profit from your misfortune."